Everything to Lose

Caitlyn Sullivan pushed her Jackie-O style glasses back on her head and took a deep breath before getting out of the yellow taxicab. She could do this and she would do this. Just hand him the divorce papers. Simple enough.
Yeah right
, her inner voice screamed. When had things with Sean ever been easy?

“You okay lady?” The driver with the thick Jamaican accent asked her.

“Huh? Oh, yes, I’m fine.” That’s when she realized she’d been staring at the three-story building of the Orlando police department without moving. “Now remember, wait here. I’ll be back in less than fifteen minutes. Maybe sooner.”

He shrugged. “It’s your dime lady.”

Putting one black heeled shoe in front of the other, she forced herself forward. She normally didn’t wear heels but facing Sean called for some serious battle gear so she’d opted to wear three-inch sling-backs to boost her confidence. Her soon-to-be ex-husband had been refusing to sign their divorce papers for the past year and she was sick and tired of his childish games. He couldn’t handle her work as an aid worker, so there really wasn’t much of a reason to prolong the inevitable.

She followed two uniformed police officers into the brick building and fought the rush of nausea threatening to overwhelm her. She clutched her purse tighter against her side, as if it provided some sort of protection.

She stopped at the circular help desk. After two solid minutes of chatting on the phone, the college-aged girl behind the desk finally looked up, an annoyed expression on her pretty face. “Can I help you?”

Normally she didn’t deal well with attitude but her stomach was too twisted to care. “Is Detective Sullivan in?” Somehow her voice came out normal.

The girl rolled her eyes. “Yeah and no surprise, he’s in a foul mood. Third floor.” She pointed behind her with a pen. “The elevators are down that hall to the right.”

Caitlyn already knew that but she nodded and murmured thanks anyway. She’d secretly hoped he wouldn’t be in. He did so much undercover work, the chance of him actually being at the station was slim.

Apparently not slim enough.

The short ride to the third floor did nothing to calm her nerves. She turned left in the hallway and tried to avoid eye contact with everyone. This wasn’t the best of circumstances and she didn’t feel like explaining why she was there to any of Sean’s coworkers.

“Caitlyn? Caitlyn Sullivan, is that you?” a familiar looking man asked. She thought his last name was Ramirez but couldn’t be sure.

“Yes, can you tell me where Sean is?”

He completely ignored her question. “I thought you were in Afghanistan.”

“I was. Where is Sean?” Her words came out more forcefully than she intended but she couldn’t do small talk. She was close to vomiting on her shoes and she couldn’t shoot the shit with a stranger in the hall.

“Oh, right. Sorry, he’s just going over some paperwork in the one of the interrogation rooms.” He pointed down the hall. “Second door on the left.”

“Thanks.” She pulled out the manila packet she dreaded giving him. Bile rose in her throat but she pushed it down.

“No problem. Hope to see you around more.” He waved and disappeared into one of the other rooms.

She stopped in front of the door and peered through the square glass window. Sure enough, there sat her husband. Heat involuntarily pooled between her legs and all the air left her lungs in one whoosh. His dark brown hair was, of course, too long and he still had that familiar semi-permanent five o’clock shadow. And he looked tired. Lean, tired and as sexy as ever. She took the quiet moment to admire his profile. His brows furrowed as he pored over papers.

That was an expression she was accustomed to in more ways than one. When Sean did something, he gave it his all, whether at work or in the bedroom.

She squashed the longing threatening to bubble up and opened the door.

He looked up once then glanced back down. She stopped in her tracks, shocked by his response but his head whipped back up just as quickly. He blinked once. “Caitlyn?” His voice was strangled and he immediately stood. The scraping of the chair against the tile was deafening in the small room.

“Hey, Sean.” She stood in the doorway, suddenly unsure of herself.

“Come in. Please.” He motioned with one hand, his eyes never leaving hers but at least he didn’t make a move in her direction.

The door shut behind her with a resounding thud. “You look good.” And he did. Way too good.

“So do you. Better than good though, beautiful.” She felt heat creep up her neck when he assessed her from head to toe. Then she reminded herself why she was there. She couldn’t afford to fall under his spell again. Couldn’t afford to let his charm break down her resistance.

“Listen Sean—”

“How long are you here?” He took a step closer so she forced herself to stand her ground.

“A few weeks. I’m not sure… That’s not important though. I came here to give you this.” She held out the manila envelope and when his eyes darkened, it was obvious he understood what was in her hand. Hell, if he didn’t know by now why she was here, then he needed his head examined. She’d only been sending him the same familiar packet for the past twelve months.

“What the hell is this?” He snatched the envelope from her hand but didn’t open it.

“Don’t start that. You know exactly what it is.”

“I’m not signing these.” He started crumpling and twisting the pack in his hand.

“I don’t understand why not. It was your idea in the first place.” She felt as if her insides were literally shaking but she managed to keep her voice even.

“Damn it, Caitlyn! You know I didn’t mean it.”

“Then you shouldn’t have said it.” She crossed her arms over her chest. Her heart pounded against her rib cage with such force she was fearful he could hear it.

“I shouldn’t have said a lot of things,” he murmured.

She rolled her eyes. “You’re right about that.” She couldn’t keep the hint of anger out of her voice. She wasn’t one to hold a grudge but he’d never actually apologized for the things he’d said a year ago and that just pissed her off even more. How hard was it to say the words ‘I’m sorry’?

“Listen, I—”

The door flew open, causing them both to turn toward the disruption. After a cursory nod in her direction, a young man in uniform she didn’t recognize spoke to her husband. “Sullivan, Captain needs to see you now. It’s important.”

Sean turned to her. “Wait right here. I’ll be back in few minutes.”

Without waiting for a response he strode from the room. If she’d had anything handy, she’d have thrown it at his retreating figure. His behavior was so typical. He didn’t ask her to wait. No, he ordered her to.

“I don’t think so,” she mumbled under her breath. When she opened the door, the hall was empty. She half-walked, half-sprinted back down the hallway toward the elevators. Once she finally made it out of the building, she expelled a breath of relief.

She squinted against the afternoon sun and her throat tightened when she didn’t see the cab. Just as she was about to panic, the bright yellow car pulled out of a parking space and picked her up at the curb. She slid into the back seat, ignoring the smell of old takeout food. She heard her name being shouted, but instead of following her instinct and turning around, she pulled the door shut and rattled off the address of her hotel.

“Uh, Miss, I think that man wants to talk to you.” He motioned behind her but she still wouldn’t look.

“Just go! I’ll pay you extra.”

That got his attention. He turned around and a second later, the car jerked to life. Before they left the parking lot, she risked a glance through the rearview window and immediately regretted it. Sean had always been in good shape but he looked leaner, as if he wasn’t eating right. Not that it took away anything from his warrior stance. Nope. One hand was on his hip and the other clutched the brown manila envelope. Maybe this would get her message across loud and clear. She was through taking orders from him.

“Damn it!” Sean Sullivan shouted to the retreating vehicle. His wife was determined to drive him insane.

For the past year, she’d been sending him divorce papers once a month. Each time he’d thrown them away. When she’d walked into the interrogation room, he was sure his heart had stopped. He couldn’t believe she was finally stateside.

What the hell was she doing leaving like that? He’d asked her to stay. If she thought he was going to sign the papers and let her go without a fight she was delusional. Before going to see his Captain, he’d gone back to ask if she wanted something to drink and he’d seen her getting on the elevator. Leaving him again.

Turning, he hurried back toward the station and tried to get the image of her petite, lean body out of his head. Not that it mattered. He had her entire body memorized. Each morning for the past three hundred sixty-five days, he’d awakened with a hard-on remembering what it was like to run his hands through her long, thick red hair. Remembering what it was like to grip her hips as she rode him. Remembering all the weekends they’d spent in bed. Remembering… Remembering too damn much.

He shoved the glass door open so hard it slammed against one of the doorstops, ricocheting violently. The loud sound echoed throughout the main floor like a gong but at least the lobby was empty.

A few minutes later he was back in his Captain’s office. “Sorry about that, sir.”

“I understand. I hear Caitlyn’s back in town.”

Damn, word travelled fast. He ignored the comment and leaned against the doorframe. Normally their talks only lasted a few minutes. “You wanted to talk to me about something important?”

“Coleman’s been released from prison.”

“Repeat that?” He pushed up from his lounging position.

“You heard me. An hour ago.”

Sean rubbed a hand over his face and took a seat across from his boss. “How the hell did that happen?”

“Judge let him out on bail until the trial.”

“Coleman has unlimited funds and loose ties to the community. Is the judge on the take?”

He shrugged. “Normally I’d say no but nothing would surprise me anymore.”

Richard Coleman was a scum-sucking drug dealer who’d managed to stay out of jail because no one had ever testified against him. In the past, there had been one or two brave souls willing but they conveniently disappeared before anything ever went to trial. Until very recently, he’d been untouchable. Until Sean and his team had managed to infiltrate his group of thugs and get a couple of people willing to turn on him. “Do you think he’ll make a move against the witnesses?” He already knew the answer but wanted his Captain’s take on the situation.

“I think he’ll try but he won’t be successful this time.”

Only Sean, Captain Jones and two other men knew the location. Too many unsolved leaks in the past had made them paranoid about this case. If Coleman found the witnesses this time, they’d know where to look for the leak.

Before Sean responded, the other man continued. “I think it might be a good idea to put you and Caitlyn in protective custody.”

Sean stood up, shoving the chair backward. “What?” What the hell was he talking about?

“He made some nasty threats against you. With Caitlyn in town, I wouldn’t take the chance.”

He frowned. “Maybe you’re right but I’ll put her under my protective custody. We’re not going to some crappy safe house.” That would just push her farther away from him.

The other man was silent for a moment as he tapped his pen against the desk. “All right but I want you in constant contact with me.”

“Okay. I’ll talk to Caitlyn about it tonight. Thank you for the heads up, sir.” He started for the door but was stopped.

“Can I give you some advice Sullivan?”

He turned back around, one hand on the metal knob. “Sure.” He couldn’t exactly say no to his boss.

“Compromise.”

“Uh, I’m sorry, sir?”

“Compromise. Don’t forget that marriage is all about compromise.”

“Thank you, sir.” He nodded once, then left the room. Caitlyn’s safety wasn’t a compromise. Not in his book. Unfortunately, she might not agree with his methods.

Before he went to see her, he had one stop to make.