Entrelacen (21 page)

I just had a hard-core make out session on my
bed, and now I’m sitting on the floor staring at the
kids while they sleep. How can everything change in
the matter of minutes? How can I be walking this guy
I’m in love with down the stairs to kiss him goodnight
one second and then be running up the stairs fighting
tears the next? I’ve never believed in fate for this
reason. We made it down the stairs before I sensed the
same presence that I had felt at the bookstore. The
only difference was that this time it wasn’t being
directed at me. Taking the stairs by two, I cleared
them in seconds to stand in the doorway of myboy’s
room. MY BOYS, they’re mine, and no one was
going to change that. He was gone. They were still
sleeping, but that weird sensation was still around me.

“Ap
ril you have done well. Taking on the
responsibility of three boys is very admirable, but
your biggest threat is about to surface. You must be
ready.”

“I understand, but will I know who I need to
protect?”
“You will know which child they seek because
that child will find an object. Pay no attention to the
object; its magic has run its course and only serves as
a beacon to true power.”
“Okay. When will they be coming for him?”
“When the moon is full. Be ready. Don't let
yourself be distracted. No distractions!"
When the moon is full? That’s only a week
away. I look at my phone. It’s past midnight now, so
it’s exactly a week from today. How ironic that the
full moon is going to land on Friday the 13
^th
. Now I
just have to wait and see which kid's life is in
jeopardy. No big deal, I got this handled.
No
distractions
is playing on repeat in my head. I hear
footsteps coming up the stairs. I know who It’s, but I
just can’t bring myself to look at him. He slides down
against the wall across from me. I can feel his stare
boring into my back, and I try to fight our connection.
I cave and look at him. I see the same sadness in his
eyes that I know are in my own. Defeated. That’s how
I feel.
I always knew I shouldn’t have let someone in.
I need to always keep my guard up. That’s what I
always did before. I knew my purpose was meant for
something greater. I knew it was the boys, and now I
know It’s a specific one. It’s not fair to have Logan
put in front of me just to have him taken away,
especially after I opened up and trusted him. The
goddesses have a sense of humor. Why show me love
just to take it away? I’m still staring at Logan when
his gaze switches to anger. He balls his fist and has
this eerie red glow. My eyes open wide, and for the
first time, I’m terrified of Logan. He must have seen
my fear because his anger is immediately replaced
with concern, then sadness again, and then resolution.
Whatever he was fighting, he found his answer.
I don’t know what he is worried about, but I
know that after tonight, everything is going to be
different. Do I take a chance or just let go now? I’m at
war with myself. If I keep him, then he may become a
distraction. If I let him go, then I lose the love of my
life. I have tonight, and that’s more than I had
yesterday.
A lump has formed in my throat, so my voice
comes out as a whisper, "Stay with me tonight.”
My eyes begin to focus, the unshed tears are
starting to clear, and his flawless face becomes clear. I
can see the same battle playing out inside him. His
eyes search my face, touching every feature, and then
he looks in my eyes. His choice has been made, and
I’m nervous that he’s going to say no.
“I’m not going anywhere, not tonight
anyways,” he replies.
Something is wrong. I can see he wants me to
overlook the last part of his statement, but all my
attention focuses on that small piece. Why is he
leaving? I should be happy about that, right? I can’t
have a distraction, so why is it suddenly hard to
breath? I hold my breath because if I try to breathe
right now, I’m going to lose it.
“Breathe baby.”
So I do. Logan is kneeling in front of me with
his hands on my face. I look into his eyes and see that
he’s worried, so I try to pull it together. A few shaky
breaths later, he removes his hands, stands up, and
puts his hand out for me to take. So I take it. I reach
out to enjoy the last piece of this because tomorrow is
a new day, a new day away from distractions, a new
day away from Logan.
He’s leading me into my room by my hand.
I’m suddenly excited, scared, and unsure. A million
other emotions are zinging through my system as
well. Only one thing takes center stage though, love.
Love trumps it all. Love for him. Love for the boys.
Love for life. Love for making good decisions, even
when I don't want to. Tonight I’m going to allow
myself to love Logan and be loved by him. I turn on
the lamp next to my bed, pull the sheets back, and pull
off my t-shirt. All I'm left in is a pink kami and some
tennis shorts. I can feel him staring at me, but I’m not
ready to look at him yet, so I walk into the bathroom.
I pull down my damp hair and brush it out. I brush my
teeth and decide I can't stall anymore, so I walk back
to the bedroom. I was in there for at least five
minutes, and he’s still standing in the same position. I
walk around to the other side of the bed and get in.
Finally looking at him, he’s biting his lip. If that isn’t
the sexiest thing, I don’t know what is.
“Logan you can stay fully clothed if you want,
or you can sleep on the floor if that makes you feel
better. Just stop overthinking things. It’s just me,” I
say, hoping to calm his fear.
“That’s the thing April. It’s you, and I’ve never
done this before,” he whispers, sounding embarrassed.
“Logan, we can just sleep. I promise.”
Not letting him overthink this one more
second, I crawl over to him, grab the hem of his shirt
and yank it off. Shit. Bad move April. I knew this guy
was in great physical shape but was nowhere near
prepared for what I see. He is beyond sexy. His body
is defined in ways that shouldn't even be legal. His
pecks are so defined. I sigh. Logan laughs.
“What?”
“Did you really just sigh while checking me
out?”
I can feel the heat rising in my cheeks and
spreading across my chest, “Umm, maybe?”
He laughs some more, “Maybe? I heard you
sigh, so there's no maybeabout that.”
“Fine. So I sighed, big deal. You can’t blame
me, I mean damn, just look at you. You’re a walking
wet dream. Shit. I just said that out loud, didn’t I?”
“A walking wet dream, huh? I’ve never heard
that before.”
What is it about him that brings this out in me?
I don’t say stuff like that, well not out loud anyway.
The heat increases, and I’m pretty sure my face is the
color of a tomato.
“I like doing that to you?”
“Doing what to me?” Rendering me
speechless, thoughtless, and flustered? Take your
pick. I’m all of those things right now.
Bringing his hand up to my face, he traces a
path from my hair line to my lips, down my neck, and
across my collar bone. I shiver.
“Blush. I love it when you blush in front of
me. When you bite your lip, it drives me insane, and
when you shiver like you just did, gah, all I want to do
is get lost in you.” His voice is deep and sexy.
“So why don’t you?” Even I can hear the need
in my voice. The very wall I’ve built my entire life is
crumbling into pieces around me. He’s broken into
my armor and embedded himself into my skin. My
heart.
His eyes darken, and I swear I can see a fire
burning inside of them, pure desire. My heart rate
picks up in anticipation, my breathing hitches, and I
bite my lip. He smirks. I sit back on my feet, putting
space between us to try to catch my breath and calm
my heart. He’s not having that though. He moves
toward me, and his hands are reach up to my face. I
could get lost in his eyes.
“Grr babe, if you keep biting that lip, it’s
going to take all of my self-control away. You sitting
like that and wearing what you are wearing is already
driving me crazy. I can’t take much more.”
I’m tired of these games. I want him. I want
him in every way before I have to push him away. So
I take a leap and pray to the goddesses that he catches
me, at least for tonight. His hands are still holding my
face, so I lift off my feet so that I'm kneeling in front
of him. Every inch of our bodies are touching. I grab
his hands and put them around my waist, so he can
pull me even closer. My eyes start to get teary when
the emotion in me is boiling, so I close my eyes
before he can see them. I close the gap between us
and kiss him. I kiss him with everything I have in me.
Every ounce of love is pouring into him from my lips.
I feel his body tense, and then he relaxes into the kiss.
His hands move from my waist to the bottom of my
cami, tugging it up and off. He slides his lips across
my jaw and down my neck, “Beautiful,” he says. My
hands are shaking but not enough to deter them from
their mission. His pants are unbuckled and falling off
as he lays me back on the pillow.
He is absolutely breathtaking, and I’m
completely taken away. His hands are on the tops of
my shorts, inching them down along with my panties.
I’m completely naked, and I’ve never felt more
beautiful than I do right now. Right in this very
moment, with him gazing at me with undeniable love,
my insecurities disappear and are replaced with love
and lust. Covering my body with his, I allow myself
to get lost in the moment.
Lost in love, with Logan to guide me away.

I’m lying on my back, looking up at
the ceiling and drawing invisible patterns
on April’s back. One of her hands is resting
above my heart. Her head is in the nook
between my shoulder and neck, while one
of her legs is draped across my hips. I
finally understand what the big deal about
having sex is. Not because it was my first
time, or because of how much fun It’s, but
because it was with the ONE. I know I
sound like a girl right now, but It’s what
It’s.

Neither one of us has fallen asleep
yet. I think in some way, we both know if
we fall asleep, then It’s goodbye. At least
that’s why I’m still awake. I know that
once I close my eyes, this will become
another memory. I’m not ready for it to
be over. I’m not ready to let her go. I
know I have to, but that doesn’t make it
any easier.

“Hey Logan?” Her voice is so soft,
like she’s almost asleep.
“Yeah?”
“I don’t know what’s going on
between us or what’s going on in your
head, but I want you to know that today
was one of the best days of my life,” she
says while on the verge of crying.
“Me too April. It definitely was the
best day ever.”
She places a kiss on my neck and
settles in. Then her breathing starts to
even out. I realize she just said her
goodbye. When I know she’s asleep, I tilt
my head to the side, kiss her, and
whisper, “I love you.”
I close my eyes, letting the feel of
her skin and her love surround me and fill
me up.
***
I wake up in an empty bed in a
room that’s not familiar. I sit up, look
around, and finally remember that I
stayed at April’s last night. Everything
rushes into my mind: the water fight, the
mud, the kiss, the sex, and the goodbye
that has to take place today. So much for
waking up with a smile on my face; the
smile is replaced by a frown.
April walks through the door with
some coffee. She looks happy and hopeful,
like everything that wasn’t said isn’t going
to be said. She looks stunning always,
wearing my favorite blue jeans and an
Adelita's Way t-shirt. Images of her
tattoos show up in my head, and an old
conversation takes center stage.
She will
have somethingconnectingyou tothat
song. That's how you will know she’s the
one.
I walk up to April and grab her right
arm. There tattooed into her skin are the
lyrics I couldn’t get out of my head that
day. I didn't connect that until now. It’s
just more proof that we belong together,
even though we’re being pulled away from
each other. How cruel can life be? Pretty
damn cruel.
“Why are you looking at my
tattoos?” She asks with surprise.
I know I’m not supposed to lie, but
what am I supposed to tell her? Do I tell
her that I got a sign on the day we met
that she was going to the one I marry?
Umm, no. Not going to happen. So what
do I do? I lie.
“Those lyrics are from Adelitas Way.
That particular song is my favorite, and
seeing you in that shirt reminded me of
your tattoo.” My voice is strained, almost
forced.
I know she can tell the difference in
my voice, but she doesn’t call me on it.
“They’re one of my favorite bands
too. I made this shirt last year when they
came to my hometown in Texas for a
concert I went to.” She shrugs like it’s not
a big deal.
She amazes me. She is talented, she
loves unconditionally, and she is incredible
but doesn't even realize it. I’m starting to
think I should have gone home last night. I
don’t regret what happened between us. I
wouldn’t change that for anything, but it’s
making it 10 times harder to walk away.
“April, you know one of the things I
love most about you?” She shakes her
head, so I continue, "I love the fact that
you don’t see how amazing you are. You
walk around with the impression you’re
not anything special, but you are. You are
special to those boys, your mom, to Gran,
and to me.”
She lifts her head at the last part,
blushes, and smiles, a real smile that
reaches her eyes and makes them shine
bright. The sun hitting an emerald, it’s the
color they become when she’s happy. It’s
become my new favorite color. I have to
say bye now, or I won’t be able to do it.
“We should get to work April. Gran
will be waiting for us," I say coldly.
I don’t wait for her to answer. I
walk right by her, but not before I see the
hurt and confusion on her face. Have you
ever been in love and had your heart
broken? I just broke both of ours at the
same time. I want to turn around and say
I’m sorry. I would do anything for that
look to go away, but I can’t. I have a job
to do.