Enticing Eve: Scandalous Secrets, Book 2 (10 page)

It had become Colin’s nightly routine to curse the darkness of night and the phantoms of his past it awakened. His memories were most savage during the dead of night. But this sunset, now blood red, conjured those same vivid images that haunted him. Crimson sand soaked with blood, the pungent
 
stench
 
of
 
decaying
 
flesh
 
assailing
 
his nostrils until he thought he would retch.
 

His chest felt heavy, as if weighted by his sins. How odd that his parents’ transgressions, while once unfathomable, now paled in comparison to his own. Colin had become proficient in acts so vile they would forever torture him.
 

Though he suspected his sister was studying him, Colin refused to turn towards her. He averted his eyes from the sunset, choosing instead to study an ant crawling on the stone a foot from him as he fought to breathe.
 

The air is fresh
, he reminded himself.
You are in England.
 

Of course, his sister knew nothing of his inner turmoil. Some secrets remained better left unearthed.

“I still admire you, Colin.” Her hand still entwined with his, she paused as if waiting for him to face her, completely unaware that her topic of conversation made his skin crawl.

When he finally did so, she held eye contact with him, adding, “More so now than ever before.”

“For God’s sake, why?” his response was harsher than he intended.

Gwen’s expression turned somber. “You learned so many terrible truths and faced each one of them alone. You chose to suffer in silence because you couldn’t rely on me or Tristan.”

Colin took umbrage with his sister’s phrasing. It wasn’t a choice, per se. In retrospect, he never considered confiding in his siblings, not once since he learned of his true parentage because it wasn’t an option. His illegitimacy was his burden, not theirs – plain and simple. Or was it? How would his life have been different if he’d chosen to tell his family or confided in Eve?
 

“I’m saddened by the knowledge that I was never a good sister to you.” Gwen’s voice shook as she turned towards the sun, now lying lower in the sky, hovering just above the garden’s tall shrubbery.
 

The scarlet was subdued now, muted by a veil of gray. Night was descending.
 

“I was young and somewhat selfish. I thought that because you were older and stronger, you needed no one,” she paused for a brief moment. “It shames me that I wasn’t there for you when you needed me.”

Colin clenched his free fist, again suppressing that temptation to flee, his sister’s honesty almost too much to endure. Though he inhaled a cleansing breath, the scent of the crisp country air couldn’t cure the fact that he felt as if he were suffocating.
 

Kindness, he had learned, could be one’s greatest punishment, especially when undeserved.
 

Why was everyone being so bloody nice to him?

Because they have no idea who you really are.

Damn that conscience of his. It recognized the beast within and reminded him that he should never have returned.

Colin focused on the sun, which was sinking further into the gardens. It had been so long since he’d witnessed an English sunset – since before Lachlan MacAlistair vowed to punish Colin for his mother’s sins.
 

As long as he lived, Colin would never forget the expression of pure joy on his father’s face as Lachlan savored the prospect of ensuring that every respectable man and woman knew all the sordid details about his late wife’s depravity and adultery.
 

He planned to expose his deceased wife’s secret and publically declare Katharine MacAlistair a whore. In turn, Colin would have been disgraced. As would Eve.
 

Though Colin despised the class system imposed upon them, he couldn’t deny the scandal that would have arisen had it become known that the bastard son of the eighth Duke of Davenport was secretly betrothed to the Viscount of Haversham’s daughter. Eve would have been disgraced, and Colin refused to allow it.

At the time, Colin was certain that she would insist upon marrying him in spite of the ensuing shame. Would he have possessed the strength to refuse her? Or would he have allowed Eve to sacrifice her reputation out of devotion to a man who didn’t deserve her?
 

He feared the latter.

It is why he joined the British East India Company with one goal in mind – to prove himself worthy of Eve. He marched out of her life, immersing himself in a savage world of bloodlust and brutality. By fighting battles he didn’t believe in, Colin quickly ascended the ranks, eventually leading his regiment through a gruesome desert. Such were the actions that garnered the attention of men more powerful than he; the same men who paid him handsomely to commit unspeakable acts.

That was when he stopped thinking of home – because he couldn’t be same the Colin MacAlistair he once was. Survival forced him to become someone else.

Someone he deplored.
 

Though Colin had watched more sunsets in India than he could count, none resembled the sunset he was currently witnessing. It started familiar and somewhat comforting. Like his fleeting moments with Eve earlier, this sunset softened him and made him feel … human. Until his daemons reared their ugly heads, reminding him of the animal he had become.
 

Gwen rested her head against his shoulder, still studying the same sunset he assumed.

“I missed you, Colin,” she whispered.

He missed her as well though it had taken a very long time for him to acknowledge it, albeit silently. Colin bent his head, resting his cheek atop her soft mahogany curls, unable to voice his emotions.
 

Somehow, he hoped his sister understood.

Chapter 4

Several hours had passed before Eve returned downstairs. The twins had managed to convince their mother to allow Fiona to narrate a fourth bedtime story and Eve suspected they would negotiate a fifth.

The first person Eve encountered when she reached the bottom of the grand staircase was the Duke’s stoic butler.

“Winston, where is everyone?” Eve asked.

“In the music room, Miss.”

She nodded in acknowledgment then headed in the opposite direction, exiting through wide French doors. Her slippers tapped lightly against the stone beneath her feet, a faint drumbeat in the now crisp night air. Upon reaching her destination, Eve leaned against the cool stone balustrade for support.

The sweet aroma of honeysuckle bushes welcomed her and she inhaled deeply, relishing the silent solitude. So many thoughts had raced through her mind since learning of Colin’s return.
 

Had it been mere hours since she heard the news?
 

On this evening more than any other, she was desperate for a reprieve from the torrent of anxiety, second-guessing, and questions that still battered her.
 

Searching the vast sky, Eve caught sight of a small sliver of the crescent-shaped moon then scanned the bright constellations that dotted the black veil above.

“Have you found that which you seek?” There was a husky quality to Colin’s baritone.

Her skin prickled as if the crisp air had been charged by his very presence. Turning, she squinted in the shadows for the origin of his voice at last finding him cloaked in shadow, seated on a bench in the far corner.

This scene was all too familiar, returning Eve to the moment she and Colin first met. Though on a different night and at a different estate, that evening still unearthed emotions she never wished to exhume.

“I apologize for disturbing you,” she struggled to keep her voice calm. “I didn’t see you.”

Colin arose, strolling out of the darkness to stand beside her.

Eve’s heart leapt at his nearness. Studying the gardens before them now cloaked in the shadow of night, Eve hoped to steady her sudden disorientation. Instead, the scent of his cologne – a combination of musk and mahogany had the opposite effect, causing her pulse to quicken. She squeezed the balustrade in the hopes that the solid stone would help Eve regain her tight-knit composure.

“You never answered my question,” his tone was smooth and rich, like a vintage port, his presence intoxicating.

Question?
Had he asked a question? She turned towards him, “I beg your pardon?”

“I asked if you have found that which you seek,” he repeated.

I was looking for you.
Eve was surprised at the direction of her introspection, yet no matter how she tried to convince herself otherwise, she did want to see Colin again.

The realization terrified her.

Colin tipped his head to the side. Could he sense her inner turmoil?
 

Gathering her wits, Eve replied at last. “I was looking for Orion.”

His expression told her that he understood, since that was the constellation he taught her to find during their last encounter.
 

Look for Orion in the nighttime sky and think of me. Know that I will be thinking of you, as well.
 

Dear God, she loved him so.
 

Averting her eyes from his, she added, “I know he isn’t visible this time of year. It’s a habit, I suppose.”
 

One that was much too hard to break.
 

Did she truly want to?

“You were in need of solitude?” Colin asked.

Eve nodded. “Was that your reason for sitting alone?”
 

“Yes,” he replied with a sardonic grin. “We have always been of the same mind, have we not?”

It was true, no one knew her as Colin did. Apparently, not even the passing of time could alter that fact.
 

What was it about this man?
 

Why did he still have such a hold over her?
 

His penetrating gaze unnerved her. It was as if Colin could see into her confused and tortured soul. His next words proved that he indeed could.

“I suppose there’s no explanation for it,” Colin paused, offering her a comforting grin before he continued. “It’s simply a fact, one we mustn’t question.”

Eve nodded, unable to trust her voice. Instead, she stared straight ahead, searching the shadows for a sign that the world was the same as it had been this morning. It was as if her very existence was out of alignment.
 

The one constant, the one comfort, was the constellations above them. She again looked upwards, searching to no avail for the three bright stars that accentuated the hunter’s belt.
 

“We met on a terrace much like this one as I recall.” There was a trace of amusement in his tone as he leaned against the balustrade, his posture casual.
 

“Ah, yes.” Eve sighed, the tension slowly dissipating. “I could never forget that horrid house party in the country.”
 

“Nor I – it isn’t every day a man discovers a damsel in distress crying in the far corner of a terrace.” Colin’s grin widened, causing his dimples to become more pronounced. His teasing manner was infectious, further placing her at ease.

“It all began with Grandmamma,” Eve quipped.

Colin winked at her. “Doesn’t everything?”

“No,” Eve returned his playful banter. “I am certain she played no role in the creation of Stonehenge—”

“Touché,” Colin tipped his head.

“My spending the fortnight with my parents, though,” Eve’s tone remained animated. “That was all part of my grandmother’s elaborate ruse. Arranging for me to visit my parents while she chose that precise moment to travel abroad in a thinly veiled attempt to force me, Mama and Papa to bond. Little did Grandmamma know that my parents would drag me from London to a secret gambling party immediately upon my arrival.”
 

Eve arched her brow, her voice animated. “Their friends were lewd and downright improper, by the way. They also had terrible taste in music. Do you remember that pianist who performed on our first evening? With all the sour notes, I’m surprised no one else shed tears.”

Laughing behind his hand, Colin couldn’t help but grin. The woman he knew had resurfaced, Eve’s tone reminding him of their conversations during their country retreat. Always teasing, their conversation had been light and their laughter boundless. Neither was able to stop smiling as he recalled.

Colin never believed in love at first sight, but one conversation with Eve Weston had been enough to convince him otherwise.

“I was there by force. What was your excuse?” Eve asked through the side of her mouth.

The mischievous glint in her eyes gave him hope she was further thawing towards him.

“A mate from university said it would be entertaining. Little did I know,” Colin retorted.

She responded with a shrug. “It pains me to admit this, but I am glad you were there. You quite heroically offered me your kerchief that evening and your company thereafter.”