Enough Of The Drama (7 page)

Chapter 10

    “China,” Cassidy yelled as she banged on China’s front door. After leaving her old home she was in no mood to go job hunting, she decided to visit her sister China instead. She didn’t have the energy to start over yet, besides she knew she would look crazy filling out job applications. She hadn’t worked in years.

   “What?” China yelled yanking her door open. “What is wrong with you banging on my door like that?” China snapped as she peeked outside. “You know how these snooty ass white people are.”

   “Sorry my bad, you need to move a little faster next time.
Ewe
you look like you been to hell and back,” Cassidy said with a frown on her face as she took note of China’s pale skin.

   “Thanks, I feel like it,” she said closing the door. “Guess who I seen a couple of weeks ago?”

   “Who?” Cassidy asked taking off her coat as she walked into the living room and sat down on the couch.

   “
Clay
.”

   “Really! How is he doing? That was my boy.”

   “Cassidy did you hear what I just said.”

   “Yeah, you said Clay right.”

   “Yeah I said Clay and you all giggily about it and shit. That nigga killed Dre. I can’t believe you Cas,” China said shaking her head folding her arms across her chest. It seemed no one understood how she felt.

    Cassidy sighed and looked up at the ceiling. “China you can’t keep holding on to this. What happened to Dre was an honest mistake. Have you ever thought about the effect Dre’s death may have had on Clay? I’m sure he’s carried around more than his fair share of guilt knowing that bullet was meant for him.”

   “It should’ve hit him.”

   “China, you don’t mean that.”

   “Yes, I do. And what are you doing here anyway?” China asked ready to change the subject, she wasn’t in the mood to talk about Clay anymore.

   “Mom wants me to go job hunting,” Cassidy said rolling her eyes.

   “What’s wrong with that?”
   “Ah, hello! I just lost my husband to my sister. Need I say more?” Cassidy said placing her hand on her wide hips. “I mean damn give me some time to recuperate and some time to heal. Like that saying goes time heals all wounds.”

   China smacked her lips. “Chick please if it was up to you, you would stay cooped up in that room till kingdom come. Besides, that nigga ain’t even thinkin’ about you. You need to turn that pain into anger. Anger is easier to cope with. It will help you get over that nigga real fast, so you can go out and find a new dick to call Daddy.”

   “Please, you sound just like mommy,” Cassidy said rolling her eyes.

   “Please, don’t say that,” China joked.

   Cassidy felt her phone vibrate in her pockets. She checked the caller ID and immediately hit ignore.

   “Who was that?” China asked.

   “Pam.”

   “What? Are y’all beefing with each other or something? Nine times out of ten ole girl is right.”

   “Shut- up and no we’re not mad at each other. I’m just not ready to tell her about Marcus yet. She told me to leave his no good ass a long time ago,” she sighed as she recalled countless nights she called and cried to Pam about Marcus and his rude behavior. Pam stated to her the obvious a long time ago, but Cassidy was determined to make her marriage work and keep her family together.

   “Cas,” China said. From the look in Cassidy’s eyes she knew she was near tears.

   “What am I going to do China?” Cassidy sniffled as tears forced their way through her eyelids.

   China embraced her sister with open arms. “It’s going to be okay Cassidy. I know it’s hard right now, but you will get through this.  So what he broke you off with a nice bank roll,
sheeit
you deserved that. All those years of work you put in for that half ass nigga.”

   A slight chuckle escaped Cassidy’s lips. “Get off me,” she said giving China a playful shove. “You always saying something off the damn wall.”

  
Knock! Knock!

   China jerked her neck. She wondered who is at her door now. “Who is it?” she yelled walking towards the door.

   “It’s me.”

   “Junior,” China said opening the door. “Boy, what are you doing here? How did you get here?” she asked stepping aside allowing him to enter.

   “Sister Patterson,” he replied walking in. “I knew it wouldn’t be a problem since you ain’t got no job,” he laughed. His smile changed as soon as his eyes landed on his mother. He hadn’t seen or heard from her in two weeks. “Hey Mom.” He wanted to reach out and give her a hug but held back in fear of her rejection. So he simply stuffed his hands in his pockets.

   “Boy, why aren’t you in school and didn’t I tell you to call first?” China tried to whisper as she walked up behind him.

   “I heard that,” Cassidy said.

   “I didn’t feel like going to school today,” Junior said flopping down on the couch beside his mother.

   “Does your father know you are here?” Cassidy asked.

   “No!” Junior yelled with so much anger it caused both Cassidy and China to jump.

    “What’s wrong?” Cassidy felt compelled to ask, although she knew the answer. The anger in his eyes made her heart skip a beat. She looked at him long and hard. Her motherly instincts kicked in as she overlooked the resemblance he held to his father and gently touched the top of his head.

   “Mom I don’t want to stay there with Dad and Aunt Ci. What they doing, it isn’t right. He told me Aunt Ci was my new mom,” he said with a hard frown on his face. “Can I come back with you and Mom mom. I mean are you mad at me too?” he asked shrugging his shoulders, holding onto the tears that glazed his eyes.

   “Cas, please talk to him,” China urged, nearing tears because of the pain in her nephews eyes.

   Cassidy looked into her sons eyes and her heart broke. She kicked herself verbally for being so caught up in her own emotions she didn’t have the time to think about his. He was only fourteen and still learning the ways of this cold hard world.

   “I’m so sorry baby,” Cassidy whispered as she hugged him to her chest.

   Any other day, Junior would have surely refused his mothers show of affection. He was at that age where he felt he was too old for his mother’s hugs and kisses. But her being away for two weeks without seeing or speaking to her did something to his spirit. She’d always been there for him since the day he was born. He only went to daycare part time just so he could get a feel of being around other kids. Cassidy took him to school and picked him up from school. She attended every single class trip and PTA meeting faithfully. She took her job as a mother and housewife seriously. As she looked into her sons eyes she realized just because she’d been stripped of her duties as a housewife didn’t mean she had to stop being a mother.

   “It’s gon’ be a’ight mom you don’t have to worry about it. I will take care of you.”

   Cassidy smiled and cupped his face before planting a kiss on his cheek. He scrunched his nose and slyly wiped his cheek. She laughed. “Come on baby, let’s go.”

   “Do I have to go back to Dad’s?”

   “No, baby, not if you don’t want too. Besides we have a lot to talk about though until mom figures out what she is going to do. So how about lunch?”

   “I’m down for that.”

   Cassidy smiled at her little man. He was a little taller than she was. “But, I am going to call him and let him know that you are with me, okay.”

   “Cool,” he said shrugging his shoulders.

   China stood aside in awe as she watched her sister and nephew. She knew Cassidy still had a long road ahead of her but it seemed Cassidy was finally making an effort to move on with her life. China engaged them all in a group hug and kissed Junior on the cheek.

   “Aunt China, please make sure you don’t do that in public,” he said wiping his face.

   “I won’t,” China laughed.

   “Okay are you ready handsome?” Cassidy asked quickly putting on her coat. He nodded his head yes. “China you are more than welcomed to join us.”

   “Nah, y’all have a lot to talk about. I’ll make sure to join y’all next time. And can you please do me a favor?”

   “Anything.”

   “Can you please get a make over? Do you have anything other than sweat shirts and sweat pants? Who wears flats with sweat pants? Where they do that at? And your hair you like you’re still stuck in the eighties or nineties wearing that big ass hair.”

   “Yeah Ma she is right,” Junior chimmed in.

   “Shut-up boy, nobody asked you anything. I don’t care what y’all think, I look good.”

   “The only thing you do got going for you is your looks. I mean you look good, just boring,” China said trying to put it nicely.

   “Whatever, I’m leaving. I’ll call you later. Come on Junior.”

   “Bye Auntie,” Junior said giving her a hug.

   “Love you,” Cassidy yelled over her shoulder.

   “Love you too,” China yelled.

Chapter 11

  
Knock! Knock!

   “What? Did y’all forget something?” China asked swinging the door wide open. When she realized it wasn’t Cassidy and Junior she quickly, tried to close the door but he was too strong and determined. They struggled for a few seconds until he finally gave her door a hard shove causing China to stumble against the wall.

   “You won’t get rid of me that easy,” he panted a little out of breath.

   “What the fuck you want Clay?” China snapped.

   “We need to talk.”

   China smacked her lips. “Nigga we ain’t got shit to talk about. Now it’s time for you to leave or else there will be repercussions.”

   Clay laughed, “Still got that slick ass tongue I see.”

   “That ain’t the only thing that’s slick. I can get slick wit these hands too and you gon’ find out real soon if you don’t get up out of my house.”

   “Look, do what you gotta do, but I’m not going anywhere until we talk.”

   China breathed hard. “Clay you really trying my patience,” she said gritting her teeth and balling up her fist. Seeing Clay up this close and personal got her adrenaline pumping. She thought she’d seen the last of him at the club; it was obvious he didn’t get the message the first time.

   “Why are you bein’ so damn stubborn? I just want to talk to you and have a civilized conversation.”

   “Please, ain’t nothing civil about you. Now this is the last time I’m going to say it. Get the fuck out of my house. NOW!”

   “
No
!”

   China squinted her eyes and charged at him like a caged animal that had just been let loose. She swung and caught him with a hard right hook. He stumbled back a little from the force, but ducked just in time to dodge another hook. He grabbed her from behind and locked her in a bear hug.

   “Get the fuck off of me Clay,” she yelled as she squirmed wildly in his arms. Him touching her made her even angrier.

   “No, not until you calm the fuck down,” he growled.

   China squirmed and wiggled but it was no use, he was too strong. She was pissed with herself, for allowing her emotions to get the best of her. Clay continued to lock her secure in his bear hug,

   “You good?” he asked. China nodded her head. Clay reluctantly released her, and prepared himself just in case she was still trying to throw blows.

   “What do you want Clay?” she sniffled, her back still facing him. She rubbed her arms and impatiently tapped her foot.

   “I just want to talk that’s it. Damn I gotta go through all this just to talk to you? You come out here swingin’ and shit,” he said holding his sore jaw.

   “Clay I have nothing to say to you, and anything you have to say I really ain’t trying to hear it,” she replied her back still facing him. She couldn’t stand the sight of him at that moment, she was doing everything in her power to stand strong but she knew the bridge that held her emotions was about to crumble at any moment.

   “Damn China, you don’t think I’m fucked up over this shit. Dre was my boy too.”

   Hearing Dre’s name leave Clay’s mouth struck a nerve. She quickly turned around and smacked him. He quickly reacted and grabbed both of her wrists to keep her from hitting him again. He wasn’t the type to lay hands on a female but she was pushing him to the limit.

    “Yeah, Dre was supposed to be ya’ boy. You should have been more careful and looked out for him, not have him looking out for you. If he was your boy why the fuck did he catch your fuckin’ bullet? He’s laid stiff in some damn coffin because of you,” she shouted her bottom lip quivering.

   He looked deep in her eyes, his eyes glazing over with remorseful tears. He sucked it up though because he held to much pride to let them fall. “You don’t think I know that?” he asked his forehead creased with wrinkles. His eyes darted from side to side searching hers for understanding of his own pain. “I dream about it every night China,” he said finally releasing her and pounding the wall. “He was more than just my boy, he was my brother. I have to deal wit this shit every day of my life.” He put his hands on his head and dropped to his knees. “He died in my arms China, and I just feel like a piece of me went with him. I feel like I let him down, his mother the only mother I ever knew, I let her down, and I let you down China. It still hurts ma,” he said placing his hand over his heart as he looked up at her.

   China looked deep into his eyes, instantly connecting with the pain he felt. She didn’t want to empathize with him on any level, but she couldn’t help it. It was as if they were drawn to each other. His eyes were pleading for her forgiveness. She kneeled down in front of him and brought his head to her chest.

   “I’m so sorry China,” he said as he allowed his pride to slip momentarily. A few lone tears leaked from the corners of his eyes. “If I could trade places with him I would. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of him. He always looked out for me. He was a good nigga and didn’t deserve to die like that.”

   “I know.”

   Together they embraced each other, feeding off of each other’s pain. Releasing the months of pent up anger and guilt by a death that has haunted them both.

*   *   *

   “What time is it?” China yawned.

   Clay checked his watch. “A little past six. Why?”

   She shrugged her shoulders. “Just asking.”

   Clay sat with his back against the wall, while China’s head rested in his lap. His butt was numb and his leg was a little sore, but he didn’t want to move afraid that any sudden moves he made could destroy the bond he was trying to restore.

   “Clay.”

   “Yeah,” he yawned.

   “How long have you been back?”

   “A couple of months.”

   “Well, what made you stop by and see me? How did you even know I would be at the club that night?”
   Clay sighed. “You really wanna know?” China nodded her head yes. “Your mother called me.”

   China sat up and looked at him. “
What
! Are you serious?” she asked giving him a sideways glance.

   Clay laughed. “Why are you so surprised? You know how your moms is.”

   “You’re right, Pearl is always in somebody’s business.” She stretched and leaned back against the wall.

   “China.” Now it was his turn to ask the questions.

   “Huh,” she said her eyes remained straight ahead. She had a feeling she wouldn’t like what was coming next.

   “How long have you been using?”

   China sat there for a moment stuck on mute.
Damn is it that obvious,
she wondered.
Should I tell him the truth
? After a few seconds of thought, she decided to be upfront.

   “A few months after Dre died,” she whispered. “How did you know?”

   “Your mother told me, and its all in your face China. You’re a beautiful girl, but your skin has lost some of its color and your hair ain’t the same as it used to be. And you’ve lost a lot of weight.”

   “That obvious huh?”

   “That obvious,” Clay agreed.
That ass used to be real phat, no pun intended
, he thought to himself. “I hate to say this but you know Dre would have a fit about this shit.”

   “I know Clay, but after he died I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, I was so fucked up. The only way I could cope is with the drugs.”

   “No it wasn’t ma. It might have been the easiest way, but it wasn’t the only way. I’ll help you if you let me,” he said taking a hold of her hand.

   She looked at her hand engulfed in his and felt a sense of security that she hadn’t felt in a long time. For some reason she felt like a strange burden had been lifted off her shoulders. “I would like that.”

   “Anything you need from me I got you. I promised Dre I would take care of your stubborn ass and I plan to do just that. I just wish I would have been here sooner. I’m sorry for being selfish and jumping ship the way I did. It just seemed after Dre died I was lost my damn self. I just needed some time to think.”

   China nodded her head in understanding. “It’s cool I know exactly how you feel. Besides I doubt I would have welcomed ya’ black ass with open arms.”

   They both shared a laugh.

   “It was just hard for me to adjust to fact that I would no longer have the special someone in my life.”

   “I know ma.”

   “Oh, I meant to ask you something,” she said looking at him sideways.

   “What is it?”

   “Have you been sending me money?”

   “Yeah I have. I figured I could at least be there for you financially since I couldn’t be there for you emotionally.

   “Thank you,” she replied sincerely.

   Since picking up her habit she had fallen on hard times, and other than drugs she had another addiction, shopping. When Dre died that’s all she did was shop and do drugs. It helped to keep her mind off of him. Within a matter of months she spent Dre’s entire savings and life insurance money.

   “Well are you still hustling?”

   “No, not anymore,” Clay shook his head. “I own a couple of production companies. “I’m established in New York, Georgia, and Cali.”

   “What? Your black ass finally went legit.”

   “Yes,” he laughed. “After Dre’ died I didn’t want it all to be in vain.. All that hustling and slangin’ I did in the streets, and for what? I figured I might as well do something productive. It took me a while but I got my shit together and got on the straight and narrow.”

   “Dre would be so proud.”

   “Yeah, I know he would be,” Clay smiled. “Well, I think I’m going to get ready to bounce. You got my number if you need me?” China shook her head no. He looked at her sideways and shook his head as he pulled out his cell phone. “Let me just have yours.”

   “Clay, I don’t want to be alone tonight,” she whispered.

   He could see the fear and uncertainty in her eyes. She acted tough on the outside, but he knew beneath her tough exterior she had a soft and fragile heart.

   “A’ight I’ll stay, but don’t be tryin’ no funny shit.”

   “Negro please, your sleeping on the couch anyway.”

   “China,” Clay said with a serious expression on his face.

   “Yeah.”

   “I truly am sorry about Dre. If I could trade places with him I would.”

      They both stood there in an uncomfortable silence for a moment. At that moment he wanted to kiss her, and wash away all her doubts and fears. He wanted to hold and embrace her and protect her from the hardships of this world, he wanted to free her from her pain.

   “Clay I know you are and I’m sorry for the way I treated you at the club that night. “But,” she croaked, tears spilling from her eyes.

   “Shhh, its’ okay,” he said, gently wrapping his arms around her.

   “I was hurting Clay,” she managed to finish. “I couldn’t handle it, the pain was too much.”

   “It’s okay. You good ma I got you. We are gon’ get through this, together me and you.”