Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy) (31 page)

BOOK: Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy)
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I thought I saw the beginnings of a smile in his eyes, but I let it pass when his body language seemed normal. As we walked to his car, I wanted to ask him about th
at woman on campus, but I had no clue how to start that conversation, and I didn’t trust that I’d be able to carry on with the evening if his explanation wasn’t what I wanted to hear.

My mouth was dry, suddenly nervous to be sitting next to him, my hands betraying my feelings as I kept picking at the hem of my dress. “Did you have a good nap?”
He turned to look briefly at me smiling.

“Yeah, I think so.” I was
struggling to engage with him, dwelling on my earlier visual of him with his little blond woman. She was cute too, which made me feel even worse. I wasn’t sure who I felt worse for, her or me.

I sat in silence until he said, “Is this how all our evenings are going to start?” I glanced at him, but he was looking straight ahead at the road.

“Sorry?” I offered puzzled. He flicked his eyes to me, giving me a half smile.

“You, not talking
, being shy?”

I felt annoyed with him, but I tried hard to contain this. “I’m not sure what you want from me Alfie.”

Head snapped round quickly this time. “Didn’t we do all this before? Friendship Lily, isn’t that what you wanted too?” He looked back at the road. I tried to make it okay between us, but my feelings were becoming more of a barrier every day. I wanted to be with him in every way, yet it seemed that I’d have to choose one or another. I could either have sex with no feelings, or friendship with sexual frustration.

“Sorry, I just don’t fully understand why we’re doing this, it feels a bit weird.” He did something I hadn’t expected at that moment,
he took my hand in reassurance. 

“Lily, ‘friends with no benefits’, your call remember? If you change your mind, you only have to say
, and we’ll stop.”

 

CHAPTER 31: PLAYING WITH ME

 

As we pulled up alongside our ride to Orlando, I was reassessing Alfie. “Why did you ask me to come with you tonight?” Not answering, he took the key from the ignition and got out. Walking to my side of the car, he opened my door for me.

“I wanted you to come and hear us. It’ll be good for you. Now, enough of the soul searching, let’s go let our hair down.”

He led me to the minivan. This had been converted for them to travel around in. Some of the seats had been taken out. Others were swapped into two booths with tables in the middle.

The extra space
 held their guitars and bags. There were four other guys sitting there – one tuning a guitar, one reading a tablet, and two in conversation at the back.

“Guys…Lily
, Lily…guys,” he said, like that told all of us what we needed to know about each other. He motioned at me to sit in the free seats with a table. “Beer or wine?” he asked, reaching into a large cooler and plucking out a wet beer bottle, sliding the excess water off with his hand, while he waited for my reply.

I felt self-conscious and blushed as all the guys’ attention seemed to be focused on me. I was the only female
, and if I was being totally honest, I felt a little exposed. “Wine please.”

He wasn’t looking at me,
 but when he turned around, he produced an oversized plastic tumbler, which was almost three-quarters full, and sat facing me. “Jeez, Alfie, are you trying to get me drunk?”

He grinned wickedly
. ”Only enough to get into your panties.” He smirked, and the other guys laughed out loud. I blushed, and felt that Alfie’s remark wasn’t said entirely in jest.

One of the guys sitting
in the back walked past us, and the others were still staring at me. He pulled a beer from the cooler and came back, stopping beside me.

“Drew, pleased to meet you, Lily. Is that a London accent?” Drew was charming and almost as hot looking as Alfie. He was taller than Alfie, but just as muscularly toned, with a strong angular jaw and fabulous
gray eyes. His hair was dark brown in color and mussed in just the right way.

He seemed a pretty laid
-back guy, and as he spoke, I couldn’t help but notice his perfect white teeth framed by a luscious mouth. When I looked closely at all the guys, they were collectively a great looking band.

We chatted for a few minutes, and I warmed to him. He was really easy to talk to. I was aware that Alfie was studying us, his beer bottle almost stuck to his lips, but not really drinking it, and his eyes had narrowed.
 I wondered what he was thinking at that moment. He cleared his throat and clunked his beer bottle noisily on the table.


Okay Drew, enough. Get your own girl.” I blushed, and Drew quickly disappeared to the back again. I looked awkwardly at Alfie.

“Were we making you jealous, Alfie?” He held my gaze and smirked, but it didn’t quite change the annoyance in his eyes, before he moved away and kicked his boots off.

He noticed me watching him. “Just making myself more comfortable, it’s a couple of hours ride, maybe we can get to know each other a little better.” I blushed crimson, thinking this was an inference to his intimate knowledge of me already, or another of his games.

My eyes flicked nervously at the other guys, one of whom continued to watch me. Alfie’s eyes
widened, realizing what I thought and smirked. He leaned into my ear, and whispered, “Sorry, honey, I didn’t mean anything by it. I meant life for you before Florida.” He was smirking now. “You’re too cute… though, I like the way your mind works.” He winked at me.

I began to relax and told him about my life, the past few years of it anyway
; my dad being a helicopter pilot, my mom a paediatrician, some stuff about my close family, and that I was an only child. Then some of the things I’d done before college, mainly the work in India and England with kids before coming to Florida.

The look on his face was one of admiration. “Dang, you’ve done some profound stuff in your
 short life already. So now it’s your music? I heard you sing a little. Your voice is sweet, but there’s a bit of grit in it, unique sounding. Would you sing with me sometime?”

I couldn’t see why he would possibly want to sing with me.
 His voice was incredibly sexy from what I’d heard during our limited time on the lawn. “I’m not bullshitting you, Lily.


I want to try some stuff I’ve been working on with you.” I should have been flattered, but I was suspicious that this could be another one of his attempts to string me along.

“I wouldn’t feel comfortable singing with you Alfie.” His eyes went wide.

“Sure you would, once you were comfortable with the arrangement.” I felt a little peeved that he dismissed my opinion so freely. He had no interest in finding out what my concerns were about us collaborating.

“Okay, your turn
,” I said as cheerily as possible. I wanted to try to get him to open up to me, and I also wanted to try to get to the bottom of his relationship with the girl on campus. She intrigued me too much.
What was it about her that had him so wrapped up in her?

As soon as I began to probe about his life, he ran his hand through his hair. “Just a minute, refill,” he said, shaking his empty beer bottle at me. He got up and made his way to the cooler. When he
returned, he squeezed in beside me.

His closeness gave me butterflies in my stomach as his hip brushed alongside mine when he settled himself. My chest rose and fell quicker as my heart sped up.
 He bit his bottom lip, his tongue flicking out slowly moistening it, as his eyes briefly glanced over my mouth. I tried consciously not to swallow when he did this.

He lifted his arm, leaning away from me, to make room between us.
 He slid his arm along the back of me without making contact. The anticipation that he could drop his arm around me at any moment made me feel really excited and uncomfortable at the same time.

His eyes met mine
, and he held my gaze. My body tensed and I looked away, before crossing my legs in an effort to make some space between us. “What do you want to know? My life has been in Florida…born and raised here. I’ve always been here, apart from the occasional vacation. That might change though in the New Year, there’s a hint we may open for a small tour in Europe.”

He turned
his focus on his beer. He didn’t look at me after that. “There isn’t anything else to say.” He shrugged and picked at the label on his bottle, before taking a swig out of the bottle and setting it down. His eyes darted over to where his bandmates were.

I was conscious that
 he was possibly hiding something. It was probably the part about the girl, so I pressed on with my questions. “What about your family, girlfriend?” He sighed. “My sister and an aunt.” His answer gave me nothing to work with.

He still hadn’t mentioned the girl. “No one else?”
He shook his head, his eyes instantly showing a fleeting hint of pain.

“You need a refill?” he said, sliding
off the bench and back to the cooler again. I knew he was being evasive with me and trying to close the conversation down.

I watched him stand with his back to me, pouring another glass of wine, before leaning into the cooler, pulling out another beer. After refilling my wine glass, he leaned forward and spoke to one of his bandmates. His conversation was inaudible over the acoustic guitar that one of them was strumming.

Alfie’s brow was creased as he turned, and I saw what I felt was a forced smile as he came back handing me the wine. “I really can’t drink that, Alfie. I’ll be drunk!” I shook my head and put my hand up to refuse the glass. He pursed his lips and a slow grin appeared.

“That’s the idea.”

I was worried that if I did drink it, my defenses against him would be non- existent. He set the wine down in front of me. “Better get that, before it spills.” He chuckled, letting the tumbler go, making me grab and steady it.

He stretched across me to open an air conditioning vent.
 His foot brushed across my leg as he did this, the back of his arm, dragging lightly across my breast as he sat back. “Sorry, that wasn’t intentional.” He looked apologetically at me.

The accidental contact sparked feelings in me, even this minimal contact made me crave his touch.
 My body immediately reacted, wanting more. The guy that Alfie was speaking to before came over and sat down opposite him. They discussed the set order for the gig. Alfie was off the hook about his personal life just like that.

I wondered if he was helping him to avoid resuming our previous conversation. As they became engrossed in technical conversation, I was able to observe Alfie without him noticing.

His strong jawline was relaxed, his lips occasionally curling into a beautifully perfect smile that was as sexy as all hell. 
Damn it
. There was no doubt about it, he’s absolutely stunning, and I found myself staring at his mouth, his spoken words not registering at all.

My eyes scanned his flawless, close shaven skin, then fell back to his beautiful full lips
 and when he smiled again, that cute dimple seemed to wink at me from his cheek.

Alfie’s
 sharp hazel eyes were like mood stones. He had a definite black ring circling each pupil making them piercing to look at. They changed color all the time.

Right now, they were hazel, more brown than green
. However, when he looked at me intensely, they were more often than not green. They made me melt, especially when he smiled, but even more so when they were lusting. When I finished the checking-his-face-out phase, my attention tuned to his voice as he spoke.

His voice
had rich dulcet tones. Listening to him speak softly made me feel calm. He definitely has a seductive and addictive voice.

Every now and again a little chuckle would escape his throat, reminding me of the times he did that when he was playfully nuzzling my neck. The effect he had on me was insane. He was turning me on
, and he wasn’t even communicating with me.

I
realized that I’d been sipping the wine as I was having my ‘Alfie feast’, and when I looked at my glass it was almost gone. I shouldn’t have drunk all that wine, but I was nervous. I now felt lightheaded and woozy just sitting quietly.

My eyes drooped closed, and I slunk
ed down in the seat. I could still hear him talking, alongside the lull of the engine of the bus. My head kept rolling to the side, and I felt myself moving as Alfie shifted me into position closer to him, leaning my head onto him.

He thought I was asleep, so I used this to my advantage and snuggled into his side.
 He sighed. “She’s fucking wrecking me, dude.” he murmured quietly to the guy across from him.

I heard the guy move away, and Alfie
 slunked down a little more beside me. I had to consciously tell myself not to tense, because I was supposed to be asleep. He inhaled, smelling my hair and sighed again. His arm nestled down the side of me, and he drew me closer to him. I heard his heartbeat become stronger and a little faster at the close contact.

His reaction told me he wasn’t exactly without feeling
s for me, and I hoped that it wasn’t purely arousal. As his palm rested along my hip, he put slight pressure on it again, keeping me in place.

I felt a featherlight kiss on my temple, his breath on my cheek
as he inhaled sharply, before controlling his exhale. The scent of him, his bodywash, and the faint smell of leather on his skin from his jacket made me feel like I wanted to stay there forever.

He inhaled deeply again, before his breathing became a little heavier and ragged when he exhaled.
 Alfie tensed, but didn’t move. He just stilled, swallowing hard, and eventually relaxed again.

Drew nudged both of us
 as we arrived at the ‘Firestone Live’ venue in Orlando. I stretched a little, opening one eye to peek up at him. “Do all English girls sleep as much as you?” he whispered, smiling slowly at me.

The urge to put my lips
on his was so strong I had to restrain myself. “Nope, just me, I think. But the wine didn’t help.” I smiled sleepily, stretching a little again and groaned. He groaned in response and swept his index finger down my nose. He pushed me away from him and got up, looking as if he was fighting his urge for me too.

“Okay, Dan, our driver
, is going to look after you, honey. I need to get with my band. You’ll be okay in the wings with him. We can hang out, and watch the others when we’re done.” Smiling, I gave him a small wave.

“Go do your thing, rock star!”

Alfie grinned sexily at me, and kissed my forehead. I think he meant to hug me briefly, but he lingered a tad longer than was comfortable before turning to run after the others.

The fact that he lingered showed me that he was still struggling to keep our relationship platonic as well.

Dan wasn’t a conversationalist, he just said, “Come with me.” However, he did take care of me, making sure that I had a backstage pass, protected me from over enthusiastic fans hanging around by the stage door, and showed me where to go to watch Alfie’s band perform.

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