Enid Blyton (13 page)

XIII

It wasn
’
t very long before a message came from
Moon-Face. "I have heard from Saucepan. He
says we are to go up to Dame Slap
’
s Land tomorrow, and have tea. If we go to the back door
of the school, his mother will be there."

So the next day, the four children set off. They
went up the Faraway Tree, and called for Silky
first. She had on a pretty party frock, and had
washed her hair, which was more like a golden
mist than ever.

"I
’
m just ready," she said, giving her hair a last
brush. "I hope Moon-
Face won
’
t keep us waiting.
He had lost his hat this morning, and he
’
s been
rushing up and down the tree all day, asking
everyone if they
’
ve seen it."

When they got to Moon-
Face
’
s he was quite
ready, beaming as usual, a floppy hat on his head.

"Oh, you found your hat then," said Silky.

"Yes—it had fallen down the Slippery-Slip,"
said Moon-Face. "And when I went down there,
I shot out of the trap-door at the bottom, and there
was my hat on my feet! So that was all right. Are
we all ready?"

"Yes," said
J
o. "But do for goodness
’
s
ake look
out for Dame Slap. I really do feel nervous of her."

"Saucepan will be looking out for us, don
’
t
worry," said Moon-Face. "I expect he will be at
the top of the ladder, waiting. We are sure to
have a lovely tea. His mother is a most marvellous
cook."

They climbed up the topmost branch of the
Tree, and came to the ladder. They all went up it
and found themselves in Dame Slap
’
s Land.

There wasn
’
t much to see
—only, in the distance,
a large green house set in the middle of a great
garden.

"That
’
s
Dame Slap
’
s school," said
Jo
to Connie.

"W
ho goes to it?" asked Connie, curiously.

"All the bad pixies and fairies and brownies,"
said Bessie. "W
e saw some once when we were
there. Dame Slap has to be very stern or she
wouldn
’
t
be able to teach them. They are very
naughty."

"W
here
’
s the back-door?" said Connie, looking
nervously round. "Let
’
s go there, quick. I do
think Saucepan might have waited for us at the
top of the ladder."

"Yes, I don
’
t know why he didn
’
t," said Moon-Face, rather puzzled. "Shall we call him?"

"No, of course not, silly," said
J
o. "We
’
ll have
Dame Slap after us at once! Come on—we
’
ll fi
nd
the back-door. We really can
’
t wait about any
longer."

So they went round the large garden, keeping
carefully outside the tall wall, until they came to
two gates. One opened on to the drive that led to
the front door. The other opened on to a path
that plainly led to the back-door.

"This is where we go," said Bessie, and they
went quietly through the back gate. They came
t
o the back-
door. It was shut. No one seemed to
be about.

"I suppose Saucepan and his mother
are
expecting us?" said
J
o, puzzled. He knocked on
the door. There was no answer. He knocked again.

"Let
’
s open the door and go in," said Bessie,
impatiently. "We must find Saucepan. I expect
he
’
s forgotten he asked us to come
today
."

They pushed open the door and went into a big
and very tidy kitchen. There was no one there.
It seemed very strange. Connie opened the
further door and peered into what seemed to be a
big hall.

"I believe I can hear someone," she said.
"I
’
ll go and see if it
’
s Saucepan."

Before the others could stop her she had opened
the door and gone. No one felt that they wanted
to follow. They sat down in the kitchen and waited.

Connie went into the big hall. There was no
one there. She went into another room, that
looked like a drawing-room. Connie peered round
it in curiosity. Then, in at a door opposite came
a tall old woman, with large spectacles on her long
nose and a big white bonnet on her head.

"Oh!" said Connie, beaming. "Many happy
returns o
f the day! Where
’
s Saucepan? W
e
’
ve all
come to have tea with you?"

The old woman stopped in surprise. "Indeed!"
she said. "You have, have you? And who are the
rest of you?"

"Oh—didn
’
t Saucepan tell you?" asked Connie.
"There
’
s
J
o and Bessie and Fanny and Moon-Face and Silky. We did hope that Saucepan would
meet us by the ladder, because we were so afraid
of meeting that awful Dame Slap."

"Oh, really?" said the old woman, and her eyes
gleamed behind her big spectacles. "You think
she
’
s awful, do you?"

"Well,
J
o and the others told me all about her,"
said Connie. "They were all here once, you
know, and they escaped. They were very much
afraid of meeting her again."

"Where are they?" said the old woman.

"In the kitchen," said Connie. "I
’
ll go and
tell them I
’
ve found you."

She ran ahead of the old woman, who followed
her at once. Connie fl
ung open the kitchen door.

"I
’
ve found Saucepan
’
s mother!" she said.
"Here she is!"

The old lady came into the room—and
Jo
and
the others gave a gasp of horror. It wasn
’
t
Saucepan
’
s mother. It was Dame Slap herself,
looking simply furious.

"Dame Slap!" yelled
Jo
. "Run, everyone!"

But it was too late. Dame Slap turned the key
in the kitchen door and put it into her pocket.

"So you escaped from me before, did you?"
she said. "W
ell, you won
’
t escape again. Bad
children who are sent to me to be made good don
’
t
usually escape before they are taught the things
they ought to know!"

"Look here
!" began Moon-Face, putting a bold
face on. "Look here, Dame Slap, we didn
’
t come
to see you; we came to see Saucepan
’
s mother."

"I
’
ve never in my life heard of Saucepan,"
said Dame Slap. "Never. It
’
s a naughty story.
You
’
re making it up. I slap people for telling
stories."

And she gave poor Moon-Face such a slap that
he yelled.

"Saucepan
’
s mother is your cook!" he shouted,
dodging round the kitchen. "Your cook! Where
is she?"

"Oh
—my cook," said Dame Slap. "Well, she
walked out yesterday, along with a dreadful
creature who was all hung round with kettles and
pans."

"That was Saucepan," groaned
Jo
. "Where did
they go?"

"I don
’
t know and I certainly don
’
t care,"
said Dame Slap. "The cook was most rude to me,
and I gave her a good slap. So she went off. Can
any of you girls cook?"

"I can," said Bessie. "But if you think I
’
m going
to be your cook now, you
’
re mistaken. I
’
m going
home to my mother."

"You can stay here and cook for me till my
old cook comes back," said Dame Slap. "And
this girl can help you." She pointed to Fanny.
"The others can come into my school and learn
to work hard, to get good manners and to be
well-behaved children. Go along now!"

To
J
o
’
s horror she pushed everyone but Bessie
and Fanny into the hall, and up the stairs to a big
classroom, where dozens of noisy little imps,
fairies and pixies were playing and pushing and
f
ighting together.

Dame Slap dealt out a few hard smacks and sent
them to their seats, yelling.

Connie was very much afraid. She stayed close
to
J
o and Moon-F
ace. Dame Slap made them all
sit down at the back of the room.

"Silence!" she said. "You will now do your
homework
. The new children will please f
ind
pencils and paper in their desks. Everyone must
answer the questions on the board. If anyone gets
them wrong, they will have to be punished."

"Oh dear!" groaned Silky. Connie whispered
to her:

"Don
’
t worry! I
’
m awfully good at lessons. I
shall know all the answers, and I
’
ll tell you
them too."

"Who is whispering?" shouted Dame Slap,
and everyone jumped. "You, new girl, come out
here."

Connie came out, trembling. Dame Slap gave
her a hard smack on each hand.

"Stop crying!" said Dame Slap. And Connie
stopped. She gave a gulp, and stopped at once.
"Go back to your seat and do your ho
m
ework,"
ordered the old dame. So back Connie went.

"Now, no talking and no playing," said Dame
Slap. "
J
ust hard work. I am going to talk to my
new cooks in the kitchen about a Nice Treacle
Pudding. If I hear anyone talking or playing
when I come back, or if anyone hasn
’
t done the
homework, there will be no Nice Treacle Pudding
for any of you."

With this awful threat Dame Slap walked out of
the room. She left the door wide open so that
she could hear any noise.

The imp in front of Connie turned round and
shook his pen on her book. A big blot came there!
The goblin next to him pulled Silky
’
s
hair. A
bright-eyed pixie threw a rubber at Moon-Face
and hit him on the nose. Truly Dame Slap
’
s pupils
were a mischievous lot!

"We
must
do our homework!" whispered Silky
to the others. "Connie, read the questions on the
board, and tell us the answers, quick!"

So Connie read them—but, oh, dear me, how
could she answer questions like that? She never,
never could. They would all go without pudding,
and be slapped and sent to bed! Oh dear, oh dear,
oh dear!