Encore Encore (24 page)

“But last night we— You slept with me, stayed with me, all night.”

“Do you have to make it sound so much like an accusation?” Kieran tried to laugh, make it sound like a teasing remark, keep it light. But it wasn’t light. It was an accusation if he’d ever heard one. And he saw its refl ection in David’s eyes, the judgment as well as the condemnation.

“Why would you go to bed with me when you’re in love with someone else?”

“I’m not in love with him. We’re just…” Just what? He couldn’t say exactly what he and Will were to each other, not without getting into the whole long story about Roxanne and the secret meetings and the whole deal which was just too… Something. It was something he couldn’t tell David.

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But one thing he did know, Will didn’t love him. And he sure as hell didn’t love Will. Kieran knew all too well what it was to love, and what he felt for Will wasn’t even close. Not even in those early giddy days of being swept up and whisked away to romantic getaways had he felt anything akin to what he’d once felt for the man now seated across from him, the man trying to get him to come back, to once again risk his heart. And, as tempting as it was, he just couldn’t take that chance.

“How long?”

“How long what?”

“How long have you been with him?” There was a beat of silence. “I need to know, Kieran. Were you with him before?” He didn’t need a clarifi cation of what “before” meant. And suddenly his choice was clear. He could end this thing right here, right now and with a single lie. All he had to say was that he’d been fucking Will since before the two of them had broken up, before that awful weekend in Boston. Except he couldn’t lie, not to David, not now, after all that had happened between them, not when he still loved him so goddamn much it hurt.

“I met him on my fi rst trip to L.A. He was working on that show,
Stop Me Before I Kiss Again,
and doing development on
What a Drag.
He invited me to dinner and he offered me the part of—”

“So you fucked him. Was that a gratitude fuck, or a please-Mr.-Producer-can-I-have-the-part fuck?”

“It wasn’t like that. I didn’t fuck him.”

“Oh, please. Just don’t fucking lie to me, not now.” David covered his face then raked his fi ngers through his hair just as he’d always done when he was stressed. “I’m such an idiot. When you came home from that trip I knew, I knew something was wrong between us.” He lowered his hands and now his eyes were fi lled with hurt and anger. “I fi gured you were torn up about the decision, whether or not to take the role, whether or not to leave me.” He huffed out a laugh. “I’m such an idiot.”
184 Gardner ~ His Leading Man

“David, I wasn’t fucking Will. I didn’t fuck him for that part.

I wouldn’t do that to you, to us.”

“Save it.” David stood. “It doesn’t matter now anyway. None of it matters.”

“It does matter. David, wait.” Kieran slid to the end of the bench and reach for David’s hand.

“I can’t do this, Kay. Not again.” David stepped back, turned away and left the bar.

“Wait.” Kieran jammed his feet into his shoes and jumped up.

He cursed the damn stiletto heels that slowed him down as he ran after David. Skidding to a halt just outside the bar, he scanned the lobby. Where the hell had he gone? He couldn’t have disappeared that quickly. Then he spotted him standing in front of the bank of elevators.

Ding. The door slid open.

Kieran ran. A split second before the door slid shut, he threw himself into the elevator.

Thank God it was just the two of them in there.

David stabbed the door-open button. “Goddamn it!” He slammed his palm against the panel of buttons, but the door remained shut and the elevator began its ascent.

“David, please, let me explain.” Why was he doing this, trying to tell what had actually gone down between him and Will on that fi rst trip? Why was it so important that David believe that he hadn’t fucked Will, not until after Boston?

“I don’t want to hear it,” David shouted.

“That’s too fucking bad because I’m going to tell you anyway.”

The elevator stopped, the door opened and a well-dressed, older couple stared at them. Clearly they’d heard at least some of the argument. It was written all over their faces.

“Excuse us.” David stepped back to make room. “Sorry.” ENCORE! ENCORE!
185

The man shook his head. “No, that’s fi ne. We’ll take the next one.”

“No, really. There’s plenty of room.” David held his fi nger on the door open button.

The couple exchanged another glance. The woman gave a small shrug and together they stepped into the elevator. The door closed and the four of them rode the rest of the way in silence.

They reached David’s fl oor. Ding. Bracing for another argument, Kieran followed David off the elevator. The door slid shut.

Okay, here it comes, Kieran thought, but David said nothing, only walked to his room and shoved his key-card into the lock.

Beep.

Opening the door, David stepped over the threshold and turned to him. “You aren’t coming in, so you might as well just get the fuck out of here.”

But he couldn’t, not until David heard the truth. So, trusting that this man who used to love him wouldn’t deliberately hurt him, Kieran wedged himself in the space between the frame and the door.

“Kieran, I mean it.” David shoved the door, trying to squeeze him back into the hallway.

“Five minutes,” Kieran pleaded. “Just give me fi ve minutes, then I’ll go, I swear, and you’ll never have to see me again.” He looked up at David, willing him to give just this last little bit.

There was a long pause.

Kieran prayed, please let him listen.

David sighed. “Five minutes, then you’re going.”

“Five minutes,” Kieran agreed, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. He leaned back against it and took a breath.

Somehow he felt calmer now that he was in David’s room. David would listen because David was reasonable. If he’d let him in it meant he really did want to hear what he had to say.

186 Gardner ~ His Leading Man

Except looking at him, Kieran was not so sure. His expression didn’t speak of openness or a willingness to listen. His face was shut down, expressionless, his arms crossed over his chest. God, he was doing everything but staring at his watch and tapping his foot.

“I can explain.”

“So you said.”

Kieran’s gaze slid past David to the bed, the same bed where they had made love. It was unmade, the sheets rumpled and the quilt trailing on the fl oor. The farther bed was made and atop it were piled two room-service trays bearing the leftovers of a shared meal. Someone had been here, with David. Maybe in bed with him. And they had eaten… what? Lunch? Dinner?

Kieran’s brain fl ashed to all those Sunday mornings in their apartment in New York, back to how they lazed in bed eating bagels and reading the New York Times to each other, back to long lazy hours of love making in the early morning sunshine, the golden light spilling over the bed, over their bodies, lighting David’s face and hair and shining off his skin as he came deep inside Kieran.

The stab of jealousy was quick and sharp, and totally unreasonable. Still, it hurt like fi re and he went a little crazy.

“Have company?” Kieran walked over to the bed and lifted the cover on the fi rst of the two trays. The plate held the remnants of a salad, a few soggy lettuce leaves, a scrap of chicken, a slice of tomato. The tangy aroma of French dressing assailed his nostrils.

He replaced the cover.

“What? What the hell are you doing?” David took a step toward him and Kieran took a step back.

“Just checking out what you and your friend had to eat.” He lifted the cover on the other tray. This one held a pile of cold French fries and the crust of what might have been a club sandwich or maybe a BLT. There was also a basket of rolls on the tray and a carafe of coffee. “I didn’t have dinner so…” He ENCORE! ENCORE!
187

picked up one of the rolls, took a bite. Very deliberately chewed and swallowed. “You did invite me to dinner, remember?”

“Of course I remember. Stop it. Put that down.” David grabbed the roll out of his hand and tossed it on the tray. “What the hell are you doing?”

What the hell was he doing? Kieran felt suddenly like he was playing a part, like it wasn’t him but some other character who was green-eyed with jealousy over some unseen man who might have shared a meal with David and maybe, possibly, shared his bed.

He shrugged. “Seems funny that if you were so anxious to hear from me, if you ‘waited all night,’“ he made quotes in the air,

“that you would have shared a cozy room service dinner with…” He let his words trail off.

David laughed. “Oh man, you have balls. After telling me how you’ve been fucking some big-shot producer since before we broke up, you’re going to come in here and act like I’m the one who’s been unfaithful? Let me remind you, sweetheart, we aren’t together anymore. I’m a free agent now and who I fuck is none of your business.”

“Did you fuck him?” Kieran eased down on the unmade bed and leaned back on his elbows. He sent David a sultry look. “Or did he fuck you? I know you don’t take it up the ass very often but sometimes…” He shifted his hips, tugged his skirt up until the lacy tops of his stockings peeked out.

David’s gaze dropped to where that bit of lace showed and he licked his lips. “Get the hell out of here. I mean it, Kieran.”

“Remember when you used to ride my cock, David? God, that was so good.” The skirt rose several more inches, now showing smooth golden brown thighs. “Your ass is so tight because you hardly ever bottom.” With a fi ngertip, Kieran traced the edge of his stocking, satisfi ed when David’s eyes followed the movement.

“I love coming in your ass, and when I’d pull out, watching how my cum would run out of your hole. So fucking sexy.”

“Stop it,” David breathed. “Why are you doing this?”
188 Gardner ~ His Leading Man

But Kieran couldn’t stop, because he wasn’t himself anymore.

So David thought he was some slut who’d fuck around just to get a part? He could be a slut like that. God knew he’d had enough practice playing one on TV.

“That’s not what you really want. I know what you really want.” Raising his hips off the mattress, he tugged the snug-fi tting skirt up to his waist, revealing the scrap of red lace that barely covered his erection. He spread his legs and cupped his sack in one hand as he gripped his shaft with the other, stroking right through the lace. “Mmm, feels good.”

Now he was lying back all the way, his head on the pillow, his feet still on the fl oor. Through half-closed eyes, he watched David watching him. His dick was clearly outlined under the faded denim of his jeans.

Oh yeah, David wanted him.

“C’mon, David,” Kieran purred. “C’mon and fuck me. I can see you want to. Why try to deny it?”

“No.” But David took a step forward. “I said stop it. Get out of here before I—”

“Before you what?” Kieran smiled, gave his balls a light squeeze and rolled his hips. “Before you lose all that fucking righteousness and shove your cock up my ass anyway?” Kieran’s gaze shifted, lit on the room service trays, on that basket of rolls, on the little cup of butter. Sitting up he reached across the space between the beds and grabbed it. He stuck two fi ngers into the gooey, greasy mess and scooped up a glob.

Yanking aside the lace of his panties, he spread the butter over and around his hole before sliding one then two fi ngers inside.

“Aaaahhh, God. Yeah.” Kieran began fucking himself on his fi ngers and jacking his dick in time. He moaned, still watching his audience through his lashes as he performed.

David made a strangled sound in his throat and stumbled forward. Kieran hardly had time to move his hands before David was on him like a starving wolf on a piece of meat. His panties went with one quick jerk, the sound of tearing lace very loud.

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189

Hands gripped his hips and dragged him closer to the edge of the bed. Then he felt the head of David’s cock against his entrance.

No kisses, no soft words, no gentle preparation, just a single hard thrust and David was inside him.

Kieran gasped and arched his spine, trying to adjust all at once to the steely length relentlessly fi lling him up. His gaze locked with David’s and he looked quickly away, not wanting to see what was there. Heat but no warmth, lust but no love. He’d wanted to make David want him, and maybe to hurt him. Well, it seemed he’d done just that, and now he found he couldn’t bear it.

David’s balls bumped his ass and without stopping he pulled back, shoved in again, hard, nearly brutal thrusts as David fucked him.

It hurt, not horribly, not enough to make him go soft, but it did hurt being fucked like this, like he was nothing but some nasty nameless little slut. Which was what David thought and, who knew, maybe even what he deserved.

Too much thinking. Kieran hooked his legs over David’s arms then raised them to his shoulders, the burn and stretch in his ass beginning to fade to a dull throb. He wrapped his fi ngers around his dick, his own hand nearly as brutal as the hands that were surely bruising his hips. He jerked himself hard, matching his pulls to the pounding in his ass.

He waited for David to say awful things, that he was a slut, that he hated him and never wanted to see him again, that he deserved all this and worse. But David said nothing, the silence somehow worse than any recrimination would have been.

The thrusts grew sharper, faster, the movement of David’s hips more erratic. Kieran sped up his pulls on his cock, the two of them racing toward their mutual and joyless release. Then David shoved in deep, his body going tense as he came. It triggered Kieran’s own orgasm and he shot, warm, sticky spunk spilling over his hand, the sound he made perilously close to a sob.

And then it was over and David pulled out. He said nothing, didn’t even look at Kieran still sprawled out on the bed, his skirt
190 Gardner ~ His Leading Man