Eliana (15 page)

Her gaze fell on the Wyoming snow globe which someone had set on the windowsill. She picked it up, flipped it, and watched the snow swirl around the plastic cowboy.

Kon. Dane.

Grief bit hard. She tucked the snow globe under the bed and out of sight.

Good riddance.

Chapter Sixteen

The room reminded Eliana of an old Japanese movie—tatami floors, rice paper doors, and screens, and a dais at the head of the room. A futon was laid out on the dais, and behind it was a gigantic painting of a samurai readying his male lover to accept his enormous cock. A naked woman crouched nearby, waiting her turn.

She glanced down as a blush heated her cheeks. The embarrassment wasn’t from seeing the image but from wanting to act it out. Nice girls weren’t supposed to want to take part in such dirty sex, but then she must not be a nice girl if she kept having dreams like this.

Especially dreams in which her hip no longer pained her and she could move with complete freedom. The beautiful clothes didn’t hurt either. She and Dane wore traditional Japanese kimonos, his blue and embroidered with chrysanthemums, hers pink with cranes.

“Do you see him?” Dane asked. He held a leather flogger which he flicked idly against his thigh.

Confused, she looked at Kon. He stood in the center, naked but for a blindfold and the nylon ropes Dane had woven around his shoulders and arms to keep him from fighting back. “He’s right there.”

“But do you see
him
?”

She considered where he placed the emphasis. Kon was there, angelic, body perfect. “I see him.”

Dane shook his head. “No, you don’t.” He gave the flogger a few test swipes in the air before striking expertly against Kon’s back. Kon gave a swift intake of breath but otherwise made no sound. “What do you see?”

“I…”

Dane flogged him again. Kon shuddered.

“He likes it.”

Dane sighed. She had the feeling she was missing something important. “Your turn. See if you can
feel
him.”

Eliana took the leather flogger. Like Dane, she flicked it harmlessly in the air to get the feel of its weight and heft.
See him. Feel him
. What the hell did Dane mean?

Studying Kon’s back, pale except for the red marks Dane had just applied, she chose her spot—and swung.

The instrument met flesh. The impact jarred her hand and wrist. Kon hissed.

“Perfect,” Dane said. “Every man is different in what he likes and doesn’t, but I can tell you Kon loves a good beating.” He patted Kon’s buttocks. “A few good hits and he’ll be on his knees begging for more.”

As soon as Dane stepped to the side, Eliana struck. Kon twitched but remained standing. Again, she swung. Red crept across Kon’s skin, deepening with every blow.

Just as Dane said, Kon was soon on his knees, blubbering incoherently.

“Look well.” Dane took the flogger. He bent to kiss Kon’s forehead. Kon calmed but tilted his head upward, obviously hoping for more. Dane gazed at Eliana, eyebrows slightly raised.

She didn’t know what he wanted. Look at Kon. Look at
what?
He was so beautiful she wanted to touch him, fuck him, raise more welts on his skin.

Dane gave a small sigh, then led Kon to the dais. He urged Kon to lie on his side on the futon, one leg crooked upward to expose his buttocks.

Incense burned. Bowls of oil sat ready for use. Several wooden dildos, carved to be anatomically accurate, waited to perform.

Dane arranged himself so Kon’s head rested in his lap. “Touch him.
Feel
him.”

She rested her hands on his back, still hot from the flogging. “He’s warm. The welts are softer than I thought.”

Dane shook his head. Yet again she’d earned his disappointment. This had to be more of that cryptic bullshit. Either that or Dane was playing games with her, and there was no way in hell she’d put up with that.

“Try again. Oil him well inside and out. Use the smallest dildo first to give him time to adjust.”

She dipped her fingers in the viscous liquid kept warm by a candle burning beneath it. The scent of sandalwood drifted to her nose as she dripped oil along the crack of Kon’s ass.

With growing enthusiasm, she circled the tight muscle of his asshole. It surprised her that fondling a man’s body, especially one so well made, ceased to hold any disgust. Kon was hers to play with, to please, to love, and she’d show Dane just what she could do with him.

Once she felt him relax, she gently pressed one finger inside until he accepted her. A second finger followed. She slid them in and out, marveling at the way Kon’s body accepted her intrusion, almost sucking her hand into the tight, wet heat.

“There’s a place inside—” Dane began, but Eliana waved him to silence so she could concentrate and explore on her own. She felt a round hardness beneath her probing fingers. Kon jerked. Inspired by his reaction, she continued to rub, eliciting more squirming and a few strangled moans.

She withdrew her fingers and reached for a dildo. Feeling wicked, she bypassed the first dildo for the second. She oiled it well, then nudged it against Kon’s asshole. Kon wriggled but made no effort to escape. She pressed, easing slowly past the initial resistance until the dildo slid in all the way to the carved testicles.

Kon’s ragged breaths filled the room. Pleased with the response she’d gotten, she gazed at Dane.

The man
still
wasn’t happy. His lips were pinched, his fingers tight around Kon’s shoulder.

“What did I do?”

“It’s what you
didn’t
do. Watch.” Without explaining, he parted his robe, exposing first his fine, muscular torso and then his swollen cock. A little nudging at Kon’s lips and Kon eagerly took the member within his mouth. He sucked it, whimpering softly.

Dampness gathered between Eliana’s legs as she watched, imagining what Kon’s tongue must feel like as he so expertly licked and sucked.
What’s the difference? We both gave Kon something he wanted.

Eliana swayed, breathless at the sight of Kon penetrated by cocks at both ends. Dane nodded. He rocked his hips to drive himself farther down Kon’s throat. Kon’s untended cock strained, the tip shining. Eliana reached out to touch it, but Dane stopped her. “Use the next one.”

She lovingly prepared the largest dildo before removing the other. She didn’t give Kon time to adjust to its absence but drove the new wooden phallus hard and deep. Muffled by Dane’s cock, Kon moaned and shuddered, though he did not yet climax. His muscles strained against the ropes.

“Touch him,” Dane said. He tangled his fingers in the hair at the back of Kon’s head, forcing him to swallow more.

Eliana reached around Kon’s leg and wrapped her hand around his cock. He trembled. The tip of his cock was sticky and warm beneath her thumb. She dug her nails into the delicate flesh of his balls, warm and taut. Kon moaned, the sound muffled by Dane’s cock.

Eliana shivered as a surge of desire streaked through her belly. A man’s body had never seemed so delicate or vulnerable, but Kon’s was. She could hurt him, tease him, or drive him mad, all by giving or denying physical contact. Giddiness made her head swim at the realization of how much power she wielded over him—and how careful she had to be not to exploit it.

Up and down she stroked his cock. Kon twitched and groaned. His feet scrabbled against the sheets. She grabbed the base of the dildo, pulled it partway out, and thrust it in again.

Kon continued to squirm. Eliana panted as she pumped. Her arms burned from the effort.

“Look at him.” Dane’s voice was softer, pleading.

The tone hit her last nerve. “Stop it! I don’t know what the hell you mean. I’m touching him. I’m fucking him. What else do you want from me?”

“
Look
at him.” Dane extracted himself from Kon’s mouth. Kon’s eyes were closed, but his mouth continued to work.

“I’m looking. I’m looking! See, he’s about to—”

Kon gave one deep, rolling shudder before spasming in climax. White fluid spurted across her hand, coating her fingers and dripping onto the futon. A strangled cry ripped from his throat.

Yet it wasn’t a sound of pleasure or mild discomfort. It was the wail her cat had made after being hit by a car.

Horrified, Eliana jerked out the dildo and held her hands high and away. Her heart thudded. Something had gone terribly, terribly wrong. She visually searched Kon, but there was no blood, no sign of anything broken. Deep shudders racked his body.

Dane just stared, wrinkles deepening at the corners of his eyes. He shook his head and exhaled. He stroked Kon’s head and said just loud enough for her to hear, “She doesn’t understand. I don’t know what else I can do.”

A tear trickled from Kon’s eye. She’d hurt him, but she didn’t know what she’d done. “I’m sorry. Please, I don’t know what—”

“It’s too late.”

“Too late for what?”As she watched, Kon’s skin paled to a pasty white. His breathing grew shallow and choppy.

It was as if she was caught in some fairy tale with a trial akin to guessing Rumpelstiltskin’s name. Asking directly didn’t work, because she was supposed to know it already. And when Dane tried to spell it out, it was as if he spoke in some incomprehensible language, and no matter how long or how hard she tried, she couldn’t decipher it. And if she failed…

If she failed…

The tremors ceased abruptly. Kon stopped breathing. Face grave, Dane draped his kimono over Kon’s body.

“No.” Eliana crawled over and pounded on his arms. “I didn’t have time. I didn’t have a chance!”

Dane tucked the edges of the kimono beneath Kon’s head and arms. “You can’t see the truth. Not his or yours.”

She might not have finished high school, but she was plenty smart enough to understand if he’d only
tell
her what he meant. “Stop talking in riddles. How the hell am I supposed to figure it out?”

“It’s not about your brains. It’s about your heart.”

She remembered Kon in the parking lot, placid and still in his meditation. Not once could she recall having such peace. “How do I find it? How?”

Dane’s kiss was soft, gentle, and full of compassion but lacked the information she needed.

“Tell me, damn it!”

“You have to find the path yourself.” He gathered Kon’s limp body into his arms. Staggering slightly, he rose like a Greek warrior carrying his shrouded lover from a field of battle.

When he was halfway to the door, he paused and gazed at her over his shoulder. “I have faith in you.”

She would have asked why, but she woke to a pillow damp with tears.

* * * *

Sitting on the bed in his suite, Kon studied the file as much to distract himself from another highly charged dream as to search for answers he wanted and couldn’t find. He laid photos of himself and his father side by side.
Face of an angel. Son of a devil and a demon
. Looking at Viktor’s 1939 portrait when his father was thirty-five, Kon was riveted by the contrast of the stark coldness of his expression and the hot fierceness of his gaze. He was dressed in a sharp black officer’s uniform and would have been handsome if not for the almost obscene passion in his eyes.

They bore the same eyes and facial features, though Kon’s were softened, almost feminine. They had striking similarities externally—at least some of the inside must match as well. Kon’s eyes burned as he reread the file.

Eliana’s departure made it clear just how true the old taunt was.
Angel’s face and devil’s spawn
. His Sensitivity was more of a burden than a gift and only served to drive people away. His father had reduced entire lives to paper without thought to his subjects’ wishes. Kon shouldn’t have looked in the damn envelope—yet he couldn’t have
not
looked.

“Are you going to go back to your clinic today? It’s been almost a week.” Dane didn’t look up from typing at the computer.

“Maybe tomorrow.” Guilt nagged at him. He knew his patients needed him, but after Eliana’s harsh words, he was afraid to go near any of them. He’d been drilled in the ethical use of Sensitivity from his first day as a student. Yet he couldn’t drum up the courage to return to the clinic he’d founded. What if Eliana was right and he was doing things he shouldn’t, even unwittingly?

What if his father’s blood was in him too deeply to ever truly let go?

“Tomorrow? You’ve said that every day since we got back. I’ve gotten three articles and a short story written, and all you’ve done is sit there and mope.”

“I’m not moping.”

“Right.” Like a panther, Dane prowled onto the bed. With one muscled arm, he put Kon in a headlock. “If you don’t put those papers away, I’m going burn them.”

Dane rarely made idle threats when he believed he was protecting Kon, yet Kon couldn’t make himself put the file away. Somewhere in there had to be a way to eradicate the darkness within him so Eliana wouldn’t be afraid of him.

Damn it
. She kept popping into his head at the most unreasonable times. His gut stirred as he recalled the dream and how Eliana had been Dane’s willing accomplice in bringing him to a mind-racking climax he couldn’t compare to any in the waking world.

“What’s it going to take to forget her?” Dane pulled Kon backward so Kon had no choice but to lie against his chest and listen to the steadiness of his heart. Dane wrapped his legs around Kon’s, offering no hope for escape.

Not that Kon wanted to escape. Locked in Dane’s embrace, he was wrapped in comfort and love. Dane had been unfailingly attentive since their return to the enclave, seeing to Kon’s every need, tempting him with favorite foods, leaving silly toys on his tray to get a smile out of him. He should be happy. The past could be put to rest, and he could focus on Dane and their future together…without Eliana. “I’m sorry. I miss her.”

“If having a female partner would make you happy, I’d do anything to make that happen. The last time you fell for a dominant woman, you ended up hurt.”

“Eliana isn’t anything like Valerie.”

“And how would I know what Valerie was like?” Dane’s arms suddenly tightened around him, making it hard for Kon to breathe. “You never told me.”