Eddy's Current (13 page)

“While I do not claim that Kathy and I are victims, I do claim that we did not have knowledge of the sponsorship of the event and I also claim that neither of us had met any of the sponsors before that night. Still, we were there and we participated in the event. Pictures of us posing with the lobbyists are real. We socialized, posed, and we lent our names to the false validity of the event and, by association, to other similar events.

“Kathy and I should not have been in the auditorium that night. Furthermore, once we arrived and realized the reasons for the event and the sponsors involved, we should have exited the building forthwith. I am truly sorry for being there and for willfully participating in the event. Those who would judge us adversely have every right to do so. I would only ask to be allowed to regain the trust of my constituents. Here’s how I plan to regain that trust.

“First of all, I will not associate with lobbyists except through strictly defined processes. Requests for me to support proposed legislation must be placed in writing and will only be considered by me after completion of a form requesting me to do so. The form must include the name or names of the persons requesting the legislation and of any group represented by those persons. Also included on the form must be a reasonably accurate estimate of the payments to be made to the lobbyists by the group in exchange for the lobbyists’ representation.

“Attached to that form must be the actual proposal for the legislation. Before I consider the proposed legislation, the request form and the proposed legislation will be posted on my web site for my constituents to read at least two weeks before a vote is taken on the legislation. I will also create a mailing list of constituents who would prefer to receive the proposed legislation by mail. Absent such clear documentation, I will not consider supporting the proposed legislation, or even placing it before my constituents for their consideration.

“I will not knowingly have meals with lobbyists. I will not attend social events sponsored by lobbyists. I will not personally accept money or gifts, in any way, from lobbyists. I will not travel with them and I will not travel when the travel costs are paid by them. I will not accept campaign money from lobbyists, the exception being that lobbyists will be allowed to give to my campaign funds up to my self–imposed limit of $100 per contributor, per year. Even contributions that do not exceed that limit will be returned if it is clear that they have been made as part of a ‘mass contribution’ orchestrated by large groups who are loyal to lobbyists.

“I will agree to regular press conferences, at least bi–monthly, with the media from Florida’s third congressional district. Constituents will be invited and will be allowed to ask questions. These press conferences will not be held in Washington and they will not be prearranged or preconditioned in any way. They will be held in my district, and the media and the public will be given no less than thirty–six hours notice of each press conference. Questions will not be restricted. I pledge to give direct answers except where issues of national security can be legitimately claimed as the reason for an indirect or incomplete answer.

“I look forward to moving on and representing the great state of Florida in the U.S. Congress. Thank you for your time, and thank you, Mr. Hancock, for allowing me to come on your show this evening. I will now answer any questions you have.”

“On the night in question, when you and your newly–elected buddies in Washington were feeding from the trough placed before you by your future bosses, the lobbyists, were you as staggeringly drunk as it appeared that you were?” Hancock asked, directing a question at Alex out of the gate that proved that it was to be a long night for him.

“I can’t speak for the others present that night. I had no buddies in the room, except for my wife. No. I was not drunk. I don’t drink. Nor does my wife.”

Hancock was not kidding or exaggerating when he said earlier to Alex that the gloves were coming off. “Were there any drugs in use that night, any cocaine?” Hancock asked.

“I know of no drug use that night. I don’t believe that question is pertinent. It sort of reminds me of the ‘have you stopped beating your wife?’ question. It’s asked for shock value, or to slap me around, figuratively speaking, while I’m on the ropes, but it really is not a pertinent question. You and I did agree that any question is allowed tonight during this interview, so you certainly can ask that question or other questions like it. To me, our agreement also meant that you would remain civil. What did our agreement mean to you, Mr. Hancock?”

“Do you believe that our elected officials can responsibly represent the people of this country while they’re inebriated when considering legislation proposed by lobbyists who, at the time of their presentations, are also staggeringly drunk?”

“No. An elected official could not responsibly represent the people under such circumstances.”

“Did you lie during your campaign?”

“No. I did not lie during my campaign.”

“Did you and your campaign manager plan, or even informally consider, ways to use the members of the media to get a message out about you that may or may not have been an accurate? In other words, did you and/or your campaign manager discuss ways to manipulate the media during your campaign?”

Alex had agreed to answer all questions truthfully and directly. On this one he paused, just for a second or so, then answered, “yes, we did discuss ways to use the media.”

“Tell me about it,” Hancock said.

“We discussed who would get what information. We discussed how members of the media, yourself included, could be used in order to get our message out. We were not well known in the beginning. We had to set up and use members of the media in order to gain the exposure that the other candidates could afford to buy. They had big campaign chests. We did not.”

“How did you, for example, use me? After you fabricated your now–famous notes, did your campaign manager then call me and fax your notes to me? Believing I would be impressed and then give you positive coverage?”

“No. We did not fabricate my notes. They were the result of endless campaigning throughout the rural areas of my district. They were the result of door–to–door campaigning on my part. They were real. We knew who to call about them, though. We knew that you were sort of anti–status quo.

“We knew that you were looking for a David–vs.–Goliath story, a story of a sincere politician who wanted to embark on a career representing his constituents vs. the typical professional politician who was in it for his ego, or money, or prestige, or whatever. We believed that was the angle you were looking to report on.”

“So, instead of a campaign strategy that called for the manipulation of the media through an expensive advertising and public relations campaign, yours was a campaign that manipulated, just the same as the other candidate, but without the money… without paying professionals to do it? You and your campaign manager served as in–house manipulators. It was cheaper that way. Right?”

“My campaign was not about manipulation. My tenure of service will not be about manipulation, either. I was simply trying to be honest with you and explain to you that my campaign manager and I had discussions as to how we would engage the media.”

“Engage and manipulate?”

“No. Engage and use.”

“When’s your next lobbyist party? I hear that there’s one scheduled for next Friday night, this time in New York. Should be a real bash. Do you expect that booze and drugs will flow there as well?”

“I won’t be there and neither will any representative of mine.”

“Tell me about your vision to represent the people of your district. What are their needs and expectations?”

“The people of my district, like much of America, have diverse needs. My constituents are students, farmers, college professors, blue collar workers, big city professionals—all of whom love this country and are concerned about what has been going on in Washington and the rest of the world. They want change. The most recent economic meltdown, and of course the worldwide political crises are the paramount issues. Though there are many other issues of importance, they pale in comparison to these. Floridians put their nation first. I was elected to help bring about change. They voted for me for that purpose. In spite of my recent screw up, they will get that change; it will be change for the better.

“Floridians are indeed concerned for America in general, for our safety from terror attacks, and for the preservation of our freedoms. We Floridians are American first and Floridian second. As for their particular needs as Floridians, it’s really very simple. Above all else they want me to be straight with them, whatever my vote or position on a particular matter. They want the fragile environment of Florida protected. They want better schools for all, and, of course, a smaller federal government. There’s more detail, but I want you and them to know that I have their mandates clear in my head. I have my priorities set to match theirs.”

“Thank you for coming on my show tonight. I believe we’ve cleared up a great deal tonight. Good luck in Washington,” Hancock said.

“Thank you for having me on. Before I leave, I have a joke for you, but I must warn you that it’s a joke about you.”

“That’s okay. I can take a joke. Go ahead.”

“What’s the difference between T’kina Hancock and a terrorist?”

“I have no clue. What’s the difference between a terrorist and me?”

“A terrorist will negotiate.”

Alex smiled nervously. Hancock laughed a laugh that said that the joke was okay and that the more serious concerns of the night had been addressed responsibly.

“Whose idea was the closing joke?” Kathy asked, her first words spoken to Alex when greeting him at Jacksonville airport upon his return from New York.

“It’s an old joke that I changed slightly to have a little fun with Hancock.”

“You did great. You engaged him.”

“I never got your father to tell me what exactly is meant by ‘engage.’ Can you tell me?”

“You got your message across loud and clear by being direct with someone without offending them, and all the while they believed that they were in control of the discussion. That’s what it means.”

“Whatever.”

“Now it’s time for you to get to work. You’ll soon have a new constituent.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m pregnant. But please listen to me, really, I mean it. Listen, listen. Pay attention. We got Hancock out of the way. Now all we have to do is wait for Thompston and Brighton to blitz us with irresponsible statements. When they finally say something outrageous — completely over the top — we’ll get them, not in a vengeful way, but we’ll get them. We just have to make sure we don’t engage them yet. Let them stew. Let it fester. They’ll keep stuffing more and more gun powder into their own keg. The more, the better. It’ll blow up in their faces.”

QUESTIONS

SPRING 2010

River and Eddy had watched it work many times. It was always the same. Its predictable nature enchanted them. Each time they observed it, they waited patiently for it to do something different, hoping that it would not. It never disappointed them. Nothing else seemed to matter while they were enjoying it. But now it was time for them to go away, far away, deep into the forest, then even further along and on with their lives. They would return someday.

Though River and Eddy believed that this particular forest was their exclusive domain, many have studied the beauty of the walk along the way. Many have been awed by the large trees that rise majestically to the sky, interrupted only occasionally by each other’s extreme outer leaves gently swaying by the calm breeze, and bristling against one another. The air was crisp, the water ran gently over the rocks and down into the small crevices, trickling down, then rushed noisily along, as far as down as possible. Though it was noisy, it did not interrupt the tranquility; it was a noise that hurt no one. It fit in — water doing what water does — obedient to gravity’s laws, just as it is supposed to be.

River and Eddy watched the bugs go about their business. The bugs were scrambling to hide, perhaps fearing a visit from the bears who came by occasionally and scavenged patiently, clawing away the bark of rotting trees, determined to locate and eat the termites that were surely there, somewhere under it all.

It was nearly impossible that anything sinister could be going on in this forest. Surely only a good God was at work here. This place had no space for evil; it was not the setting for malevolence. This was a good place for River and Eddy to unwind and relax.

Their eyes carried them to yet another wonder, and then another, simply by turning their heads. There it is… over there: a sparrow, deer, a stream. Nature called their names as only she can beckon. They answered silently with their eyes and with their own sense of wonder. Words were not necessary. Strange how it works—people, those with much or with little, awed by nature in this place.

River and Eddy exited the forest at the base of the trail and went directly to the small parking lot. It was time to return to the cabin, time to leave tranquility and begin the gradual, far–too–soon return to normal life. The hike was over, the entire trek was nearly over, and life was soon to return—boring reality, predictable and filled with the stress that River disdained.

“Don’t bother planning any work–related events for the next ten years or so,” River joked. “I will be useless for quite a long time after being here in these woods. I can’t believe it’s over.”

“Trust me, River, it’s over,” Eddy responded with a bland reality that somewhat bothered River, but to which he had become accustomed. Eddy always found a way to move on and get going to the next of life’s challenges after a mini vacation such as this, or a wonderful party, family get–together, or any of life’s other treats.

River always stayed behind, just a while longer—sometimes quite a bit longer. Enjoy the relaxation by staying away from work a week or so longer. Stay at a party until two or three the next morning. Enjoy all of life’s special moments, and don’t let them go. To do so is to face the drudgery of life rather than to enjoy its treats. For River, it really was a choice between two extremes. The good times ended too early for River. Still, he knew Eddy was right about getting on with real life. But could she just be unrealistic? Just once? No, not really. Eddy embraced reality; River rejected it. River enjoyed his naps.