Dunc's Undercover Christmas (5 page)
Read Dunc's Undercover Christmas Online
Authors: Gary Paulsen
They led him through the mall toward Halversons. The little kids went wild when they spotted him. One little girl grabbed his
leg and wouldn't let go. He tried to shake her off. She hung on tight.
Amos bent down and whispered something to her. She let go and ran off screaming for her mother.
“What did you say to her?” Dunc asked.
“I told her that Santa lets me eat all the bad little kids for breakfast. And her name was next on the list.”
Dunc tried not to smile. “She'll probably have nightmares.”
“Good.”
“Okay, Amos. Here's the store.” Dunc straightened an antler. “You find a good spot where you can watch the Santa. T.J. and I will keep an eye out for the van.”
Amos moved in near the Santa. It was Jim Sikes from the Lundini Agency. Amos found a spot on the far side of the platform and sat down. The reindeer head was heavy, so he decided to lie down. When the kids finished with Santa, they paraded by Amos and petted him.
Amos was almost asleep when he heard a familiar voice. His eyes flew open.
Melissa.
She and one of her friends were baby-sitting the little boy who was talking to Santa. Melissa was standing near the platform waiting. Then it happened.â¦
Melissa reached out her hand.
And petted him.
Amos knew it was true love. He got up on all fours to talk to herâbut one of his antlers got caught in her hair. Every time he moved, he yanked her hair.
Melissa's friend finally managed to get them untangled. Melissa turned and walked away without a backward glance. The kid they were baby-sitting gave him a good hard kick in the ribs. And Melissa's friend bent his antler for good measure.
Amos sat up and watched them go. Dunc moved up behind him and whispered, “What was that all about?”
Amos let out a sigh. “She touched me, Dunc. Did you see it? I told you we had a relationship.”
“She didn't know it was you. You have a reindeer suit onâremember?”
Amos sighed again. “She left me some of her hair.” He took a piece off his antler and held it up. “See?”
Dunc shook his head. “Listen, Amos. Now is not the time for you to get crazy on me. T.J.'s spotted the van. Something could break loose any minute. If that Sikes guy makes a move, you stay right with him. Got it?”
“Sure.”
“Amos?”
“I'm sure.”
Dunc knew something was about to happen. He hoped he had everything covered. T.J. was watching the outside door. Amos was watching Sikes. He had alerted Mall Security and the store manager. All he could do now was wait.
Amos was sitting on the edge of the platform playing with a piece of Melissa's hair. He looked up. Jim Sikes was taking a break. Sikes put a sign in his chair, telling the kids Santa would be right back.
Sikes had taken breaks before. But this one was different. This time he took his bag with him. Amos quickly wiggled out of his costume and followed.
Dunc saw Amos and Sikes leave the platform and was about to follow them when he noticed two other Santas coming in from the mall entrance. Each one was carrying a bag identical to Sikes's.
So that's how they did it, Dunc thought. No wonder no one had been able to identify them.
The new Santas made sure everyone in the store saw them. They even talked to a few people to be certain.
Sikes, on the other hand, was making a quick round of the store. He shoved anything that was loose into his black bag. Amos watched him scoop in rings, watches, clothes, and china.
When Sikes was through, he set his bag down on the floor. One of the new Santas casually walked by and traded bags with him.
T.J. and Amos raced over to Dunc. “What do we do now?”
“We have to keep all three of those Santas in the store until the police get here. Amos, you take Sikes. Do whatever you have to, but don't let him leave.”
Sikes had gone back to his Santa chair just as if nothing had happened. The little kids started lining up to talk to him.
Amos took his job seriously. He cut in front of the first little kid and sat down on Sikes's knee.
“You're kinda big for this, ain't you?” Sikes asked.
“I just want to make sure you know everything I want for ChristmasâSanta.” Amos gave him a toothy imitation grin and started rattling off his wish list.
Dunc and T.J. ran for the back door. They stood in front of it, blocking the exit.
The two new Santas walked up. The taller one said, “Excuse us, boys. We need to get through that door.”
The boys didn't move.
One of the Santas reached for T.J. The alarm in his trench coat went off. The boxing glove popped out and hit the man right between the eyes. It knocked him out cold.
“It works! It really works! Did you see that, Dunc?”
The other Santa dropped the bag, pushed the boys to the side, and ran out the door.
Dunc started after him.
“Don't bother,” T.J. said. “He's not going anywhere. Like my great-grandma always says, âStop the wind, and the eagle won't fly.'Â ”
Dunc looked puzzled.
T.J. grinned. “I let the air out of their tires.”
“Front page. Look at this, Amos. You made the front page of the newspaper.” Dunc showed him the copy he'd brought over.
“I've seen it,” Amos sulked.
“It's a good likeness. Everybody in town should recognize you.”
“Dunc, I'm sitting on Santa's knee. My reputation is shot. I won't be able to show my face in public for the next twenty years.”
“It's not that bad, Amos. You should be proud of yourself. You helped bust up a ring
of thieves. Those guys will be spending Christmas behind bars.”
“Maybe they'll let me join them.”
Dunc sat down on the living-room couch beside Amos. “I have some news that'll cheer you up.”
“An earthquake is about to swallow my house?”
“Better. I've decided to give you your Christmas present a day early.”
Amos looked around. “Where is it?”
“You'll know more about it when T.J. gets back.”
“You sent T.J. to buy my present?”
“No. I sent him to work out those details I was telling you about.”
The front door slammed. T.J. came running in with a package in his hand. “It's all taken care of, Dunc.”
“Is that my present?” Amos grabbed the package from T.J.'s hands.
“No. I found this on the porch. There wasn't a card with it, so I don't know who it's for.”
Amos ripped it open. Inside was the
robot from the department store. “Thanks, Dunc. It's just what I wanted.”
“That's not my present, Amos. I got you something else.”
Amos scratched his head. “Then who ⦔
A small white card was in the robot's hand.
Dunc read it out loud: “Â âCongratulations on your case. Thank you for still believing. S. Claus.'Â ”
T.J. and Dunc stared at each other.
Amos looked smug. “And you guys made fun of me! Said I was crazy! Imagining things! How do you explain this?”
Dunc started to answer, but T.J. cut him off. “It's almost time for the you-know-what. You better get him ready.”
“What are you guys up to?” Amos asked.
Dunc cleared his throat. “It's about your present, Amos. I tried my best to think of the one thing you want more than anything else. I think I've found it. In approximately three minutes, Melissa Hansen is going to call here.”
“Melissa â¦Â call â¦Â here?”
“Hold him down, T.J. He gets like this when he thinks a phone will ring.”
T.J. held him on the couch.
Dunc continued. “T.J. went over to Melissa's house and told her that someone at this number would like to buy raffle tickets from her for the Christmas bazaar. She doesn't know it's you. Do you understand so far?”
Amos was rocking back and forth. He was breathing hard, and his face was turning red.
“Is he okay?” T.J. asked.
“Yeah. It usually doesn't start until he hears the first ring.” Dunc looked at Amos. “Here's how we're going to do it. Are you listening, Amos?”
Amos nodded. His tongue was hanging out of the side of his mouth.
“When the phone rings, I'm going to hold it up to your ear. No crashes. No wrecks. When you hear her voice, all you have to do is talk to her. Got it?”
Amos nodded again.
“One minute,” Dunc said. “You better get a good hold on him, T.J. When that phone rings, no telling what will happen.”
They waited. Dunc counted down the seconds.
Amos was sweating.
It rang.
Dunc picked it up and held it to Amos's ear.
“Hello. This is Melissa Hansen.⦠Hello?”
Silence.
Amos fell over in a dead faint.
T.J. tried to revive him.
Dunc quietly hung up the phone and smiled. “Merry Christmas, Amos.”
*
1. Do you
(a) sharpen your pencils every day and keep them sorted from longest to shortest?
(b) write with whatever you find lying around in your drawer?
(c) consider yourself lucky if your neighbor has a pencil you can borrow?
2. Is your bedroom floor
(a) so clean you could eat a meal off it?
(b) partially visible near the corners of the room?
(c) buried under so much stuff you can't remember what color it is?
3. Is your bicycle
(a) a smoothly oiled, finely tuned machine in perfect working condition?
(b) slightly squeaky so wherever you go, people can hear you coming?
(c) so junky the neighbors' cat keeps trying to bury it in the backyard?
4. Do you
(a) make your bed to army regulationsâso
tightly a dime could bounce off your sheets?
(b) make your bed when your mother makes you make it?
(c) need hypnosis therapy to remember the last time you made your bed?
5. Have you been known
(a) to organize the paper clips in your desk drawer?
(b) to find last week's homework hidden in your desk drawer?
(c) to leave slices of pizza in your desk drawer?
6. In your bedroom, do you
(a) rotate the posters monthly to prevent visual boredom?
(b) convince yourself that last year's arrangement is good enough for this year to avoid the bother of changing them?
(c) use the one poster on the back of your door for a dart board?
7. Do you
(a) count hairs to be sure to part your hair in exactly the same place every time you comb it?
(b) brush your hair with your hands on your way out the door?
(c) just put on a hat in the morning rather than look in a mirror?
8. Do you
(a) turn in extra-credit reports along with your regular homework just to be safe?
(b) frantically finish your assignment before the bell rings?
(c) have trouble remembering if you did your homework when the teacher asks?
9. Do you
(a) color-coordinate everything in your closet?
(b) feel lucky if what you're wearing makes it to a hanger by the end of the day?
(c) fear for your life when you open your closet?
10. Are you
(a) perfectly able to answer a ringing telephone?
(b) nervous when the phone rings, because it might be someone you owe money to?
(c) hard-pressed to get to the phone without wrecking at least one room in your house?
Give yourself 10 points for every (c) response, 5 points for every (b) response, and subtract 5 points for every (a) response.
*
You may want to answer on a separate sheet so others can take this challenge too.
If you scored LESS THAN ZERO points, then you are a dead ringer for Duncâget out your detective kit, you may have investigative talents you haven't discovered yet.