Doomsday Love: An MMA & Second Chance Romance (14 page)

“Fuck,” he breathed. “Fuck, Jenny.”

“What?” I finally spoke, my voice hardly a whisper.

“That’s what you want, isn’t it? All of that shit I just said is exactly what you want.” He shook his head with a small huff. He still had my face in his large, rough hands. “You want me so fucking bad, but you don’t even know what I can provide. That’s seriously fucked up. Realize this, Jenny,” he said, face stern, his chest pressing on mine. “I’m not a good guy. I don’t say sweet shit and I don’t like to fucking apologize. In a sense, I’m just like my fucking father. But… unlike him, I won’t sleep on my feelings. I won’t put up a guard against you. I keep getting told that I’m only hurting myself when I do that. So you want me?” he breathed raggedly, leaning forward and skimming my jawline with the tip of his nose. “You want me, so I’ll let you see for yourself just how truly fucked up I am. I’ll let you decide whether you really want to get to know me, or if you will just end up hating me, which is exactly what I am expecting.”

With our eyes bolted, I could feel it all. I could feel
him
—the fire racing through my veins, my heart pounding like a fucking drum. I was on the tip of my toes and I didn’t even realize it.

My breasts were pressed on his solid chest, bodies glued, and then, finally, it happened. It happened and it was so good I felt like I’d died and gone to heaven.

Drake’s lips crushed mine, thick fingers curling around the nape of my neck. He held me the entire time, his tongue sweeping through my mouth, stealing a taste.

He groaned, his groin pressing into me, digging into my belly. I moaned when our tongues mingled, and sighed when he pulled away for a fleeting moment.

I’d never felt a pull so strong—never felt so much fire and pleasure running to my core. My back was pressed against the cool window, his hands still clasping my face, his manhood hardening in his sweats, and molding perfectly between my legs.

Seconds later and his hands came up to my hair, possessively yanking out the band that held the ponytail, tugging, and gripping when my curls were set free.

I whimpered, not from pain, but from ultimate satisfaction. It felt nice to experience this rough side of him—the
mean
side.

Drake had lost control. He, too, wanted this. He wanted it so bad and now that he had it, he didn’t want to let go. And, fortunately, I didn’t mind it. He could have kissed me until the sun rose for all I cared.

We remained this way for several minutes. My hands didn’t know what to do. All they knew was that they wanted to touch him.
Everywhere
. I wanted to grab the rock in his pants, fiddle and play.

I wanted to please him, release some stress. I wanted him to know that it was okay—that I was okay and that I was still that friend he could talk to.

When the kiss finally broke, his eyes bore into mine. His lips were raw and wet, face as hard as stone. He released me slowly, feeling that magnetic pull between us—the one that was extremely hard to deny.

I couldn’t pull away either. Truth be told, I didn’t want to.

We were greedy for each other.

I panted.

He simply watched me.

The bell above the restaurant door chimed and finally we snapped out of it as Kylie called my name.

I straightened up, and Drake rubbed his mouth with the back of his arm. He stepped to my side, looking towards Kylie, who’d finally found us by the car.

She had a smirk on her lips as she looked between us. I tried to fix my disheveled hair—the dead giveaway that it was—glancing up at Drake, who was focused on anything but me right now.

“Got your text,” Kylie huffed. “Oscar said he’d give me a ride home. Is that cool?” She was grinning like a fool now, stealing glances of Drake who was now focused on his shoes.

“Yeah,” I said way too cheerily. “That’s cool with me! Text me when you get home!”

“Oh, I’m not going home,” she beamed, wiggling her eyebrows.

I shook my head. “Bad girl. Well, have fun but be safe!”

“Girl, I have a fighter with me. I’m safe for now.” She grinned at me and then at Drake. “
You guys
be safe.” She winked at me, giving me that
we are definitely going to talk about this ASAP
look. “See you later, Jen.”

“Later, Kylie.”

Kylie hurried back for the restaurant and through the window I saw her sit with Oscar again. Oscar wasn’t paying much attention to her. He was looking through the window and in our direction.

He turned and asked Kylie something, she responded, but then he looked again for a few seconds before turning around and shrugging.

My heart was still dancing in my chest. I ran the bottom of my shoe across the gravel on the road, unsure of what to say now.

My lips still tingled, my belly fluttering, chest tight. I was beaming, and I tried to push it aside but it wouldn’t budge.

“You should get home,” Drake murmured.

I looked up at him. “I’m not ready to go home yet.”

“Well, you can’t stay out here all night.”

I pouted a little. “What are you going to do?”

“Eat,” he said, almost laughing. “I need fuel.”

“You like this place?” I asked, looking around the restaurant.

“It satisfies.” His arms went across his chest again. “And it’s cheap.” He looked down at me, and I felt flushed, sinking my teeth into my bottom lip.

“That it is.”

Unfolding his arms, he stepped forward, scanning me again. “I’m free tomorrow. Call me.” He started to walk off, but before he could get away, I caught his hand, spinning him around.

There wasn’t enough space between us, so we clashed into one another. Luckily, he caught me, strong arms tight around my middle. His eyes were filled with fire, but they weren’t the type of flames that held anger.

These flames were intense and hungry. Almost desperate.

I put on a small smile and meshed my lips together. That kiss had me feeling all types of bold and confident with him.

I smiled.

His mouth twitched, failing to prevent one.

Finally I went for the kill, pressing in, and kissing him tenderly one last time before I left.

He didn’t fight it. He allowed me, though he didn’t exactly return the kiss. When I pulled away, my smile was coy and I vanished from his grasp.

“I’ll call you tomorrow,” I said, and then I turned, opening my car door and sliding in. I started the ignition and when I put the car in reverse, Drake was still standing in the parking lot.

I waved at him.

He didn’t wave back, just stared at me.

I laughed, and then I left Buckley’s. And then I giggled because he just didn’t get it.

He didn’t understand why I liked him so much, and worse, he didn’t know why he felt the exact same way.

I couldn’t explain why…I just did.

There was just something about him—something I couldn’t ignore or deny.

I
kissed her
.

And she kissed me back… twice.

What the fuck was I thinking, chasing after her?

That was stupid. So fucking wrong. What the hell had I gotten myself into? I knew better. I was working so hard to push her away, and when it finally happened, I lost my shit.

I wasn’t letting her leave me like that. She and I both knew what we really wanted, but my paranoia was getting the best of me. I knew Jenny well—well enough to know she would never do anything to hurt me.

She’d always had a kind heart, and it was something I admired about her because it reminded me of my mother. And fuck, she looked so sexy in that dress.

That kiss was not what I was expecting. I shouldn’t have done it… but I didn’t regret it. Not a single fucking moment of it.

Damn...

What was she doing to me?

Why couldn’t I stay away?

* * *

M
etal scraped
.

A door slammed.

Voices rumbled and hissed, one of them light and feeble, the other deep and gravelly.

I groaned, groggily rubbing my eyes as I came to. The sunlight was splashed on the wall across from me. Fortunately, it was no longer gloomy or raining.

I pushed up on my elbows, catching the sound of a familiar deep voice floating through the hallway from the kitchen. Then I heard Grandma Marie’s voice. She was whisper-hissing—that thing she did when she didn’t want certain people to hear what she was talking about.

She most likely had a friend over, maybe Mr. Johnson from across the street, and was probably talking some crazy shit about me coming in late last night. She hated it when I came home late without calling.

I started to lie down again, but when I heard, “He can’t keep staying here with you! You’re dying, bitch!” I shot up, realizing it was Flex’s voice coming from the kitchen.

My knuckles ached as I pushed up on my fists, stumbling off the couch and stomping down the hallway.

Grandma Marie was standing in front of the stove, her usual pale face now mortified. When she heard me coming, her eyes swung over to me and she uncovered her mouth, stepping aside.

Flex stood by the screen door, arms folding, nostrils flared.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” My voice couldn’t come out as anything but a snarl. It was too fucking early for this shit and he was the last person I wanted to fucking see.

“Go back to sleep, Drake. It’s okay. I can handle this.” Grandma Marie stepped to my side, but I shook my head.

“Grandma, go get back in bed. Go rest. I’ll handle this.”

Grandma Marie didn’t react right away. She watched the mini-showdown between me and Flex, squeezing my arm with nimble fingers. She was begging me to look down at her, but I couldn’t. I refused to let her love ease my temper. Not today.

Finally giving up, Grandma Marie rushed around me, slipping out of the kitchen but not before giving me one final glance. I heard her bedroom door creak, but it didn’t shut.

Such a hardheaded woman. I knew she was listening through the crack of the door.

“Why am I waking up to you in
my
fucking kitchen, talking to
my
grandmother, like you’ve lost
your
goddamn mind?” I moved closer. Flex unfolded his arms when he glanced down at my balled fists. I’d had enough of him. He was asking for an ass-whooping now.

“You should be at home, training for that fucking fight tomorrow night,” he snapped.

“I am home,” I said through clenched teeth. My brows furrowed, anger taking hold of every single inch of me.

He laughed. “You call
this
home? This piece of fucking garbage?”

I wouldn’t have reacted to his statement, but when he took two steps toward me, looking me over as if I was worthless, I snapped. He didn’t have to say shit. His glare alone was enough.

I charged him, forcing his back against the fridge, my forearm at his throat.

The candles and pots Grandma Marie kept on top of it rattled and clanked. A cylinder candle hit the floor, causing a loud thunk.

“Get the fuck out of my house,” I seethed.

“Or what?” he countered, putting on a smirk. “All you can do is threaten me. And why?” He dropped his head, staring me in the eyes. “Because you’re a pussy who listens to his sweet, old grandmother. If you knew what was best for you, you’d drop the old hag and come back to where you belong. Under my fucking roof. You wouldn’t be as good as you are if it wasn’t for me. Sad that you think listening to her is gonna get you anywhere. You’ve got it all wrong, boy.”

I dug my forearm into his throat. “What the fuck do you care? You bet against me last night. The whole Pit was talking about it.”

His eyes darted to the right, and I looked with him, spotting Grandma Marie standing between the frames of the kitchen entrance. Her body was so weak, her face so pale. She was getting worse by the day, the cancer stealing away every ounce of her energy—every spark of life.

“Drake,” she murmured, with a shake of her head. “Son, calm down. What do I tell you everyday?”

Be calm. Be brave. Be better than him.

I ignored the chant of her daily words, snatching my gaze away and focusing on Flex again. His smirk made my blood boil. “Go on. Listen to grandma now.”

Rapidly, my hand went to his throat, squeezing tight. He tried not to flinch, but I knew he wanted to react. I could have squeezed the life right out of him, right there. I was taller than him now. Bigger than I used to be. I was so fucking close to doing it, but when Grandma Marie called my name again, I caved.

Her voice was gentle. It reminded me of my mother’s. She reminded me of her so much. I could see where Mom got all her beauty and kindness. I just couldn’t understand how she’d let a fuck-up like Flex ruin her. She was so much better than him.

Nostrils flared, I finally yanked away, stepping back as Flex stepped away from the fridge. He poked his chest out as if he were going to take action now. He fucking knew better. He wouldn’t touch me. He wasn’t stupid. The last thing he wanted to do was lose his moneymaker.

We stared at one another, and I hated that my eyes were the same color as his. I hated that we looked so much alike. I hated that we shared the same blood. I wanted nothing to do with this fucker.
Nothing
.

“Go now, Frank, before I call the cops.” Grandma Marie went for the telephone on the wall. She picked it up, and started to dial but Flex moved quickly, knowing that if she called once more, he would be tossed in jail. It was the last straw.

Flex hurried for the screen door, but before he was out, he called, “See you tomorrow night…
Doom
.”

The door slammed closed, and he left us in the wake of his mayhem. Grandma Marie blew a breath, swallowing hard as she came my way. Her eyes caught mine, and guilt flooded me like water in a dam.

“I hate him,” I grumbled.

“Don’t say that. You don’t hate your father. You just disagree with him.”

“No, Grandma, I
hate
him. He’s done nothing for me. He fucked up my life. He fucked up Mom’s life. Why the hell does he keep coming here, anyway? We agreed that he wouldn’t come here anymore as long as I kept fighting for him! He got what he wanted!”

Grandma dropped her head, squeezing my hands with emotional eyes. She gestured towards the two-top table, ordering me to sit as she did. I sat, but she kept my hands in hers, sighing.

“Honey, we both know I won’t be here long. And we both know you won’t be able to pay the bills here if you do decide to stay.”

I frowned, yanking my hands away. “What are you trying to say?”

She studied my eyes, the gold flecks in her hazel reminding me of Mom’s. “I’m saying that… I may have asked your father to look out for you once I’m gone.” I pushed out of my chair, starting with a protest but she yanked me back down, continuing before I could even speak. “I have nothing left, Drake.
Nothing
. I used all of my savings on your mother’s funeral, as well as Papa Jacob’s. I haven’t come close to paying off my mortgage. I’m behind on my bills from the clinic.” Tears rimmed her eyes as she sighed. “Trust me, baby boy, this was a last resort. But you know we have no one. I know Oscar and Otto will help you when they can, but they have their own problems. Your Aunt Jane won’t be able to provide much. So that only left me one person to ask. Someone that is, unfortunately, closer than you want him to be.”

“Flex,” I spat.

“I know this isn’t what you want—”

“No, it’s not what I want. You’re right! We can find a cheaper place, Grandma. I don’t know. We can do something. I just don’t want that motherfucker back in my life. I don’t want him thinking he has any control over me outside of fighting. You and I both know if I’m around him for too long, one of us will end up dead… and we all know it won’t be me.”

Grandma Marie shook her head but didn’t say anything more. She watched me pace the kitchen, watched as I knocked pans off the stove, plates off the counter.

My rage consumed me. I shook the fridge, punched the wall. I was pissed the fuck off and I hated that she’d waited so long to tell me.

It wasn’t even Flex that I was worried most about. No. That’s just what I wanted her to think. Truthfully, it was the fact that she said she didn’t have long to live.

I knew it. We both knew it. I just didn’t want to believe it.

In my mind, Grandma Marie was still the sweet, healthy woman that made me banana pancakes and eggs every Sunday morning. She was the woman that took care of me after I lost Mom.

I pulled at the roots of my hair, plopping down in my chair, breathing raggedly through my nostrils. Looking up, I peered at Grandma Marie who only watched me with wet, defeated eyes.

She had no more strength to argue—no more fight within her. She only had one choice, and she chose letting Flex take care of everything after she was gone rather than allowing me to suffer through it.

She knew I would never accept his help. I was sure they had the payments already arranged. Fuck that. I wouldn’t take any of his money. I would move out of the home I grew up in before I let his bitch-ass help me.

“I’m… I’m sorry,” I whispered, voice cracking. “I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

She rubbed my hand. “You will be okay, sweetie. You have made it this far, right?” She reached forward to stroke my cheek.

“With your help,” I muttered, glancing up.

“No. You’ve been a greater help than you think, Drake.” Grandma Marie lifted both brows, a smile playing on her lips. “So… who is Jenny?” she questioned.

I sat up straight, my eyebrows pulling together. “What?”

“You heard me. Jenny?” She laughed lightly. “I saw her name pop up on your phone screen when I woke up.” I began to protest yet again until she held up a hand to stop me from talking. “Don’t worry, I didn’t check your phone, but I saw her name. I’ve been seeing it a lot lately. Hearing it from the twins. Makes me wonder…”

“Wonder what?” I asked, suddenly uneasy. I shifted in my seat, looking away. It wasn’t Grandma Marie that was making me feel this way. It was the thought of Jenny.

The swirling I felt in the pit of my belly, the way my chest tightened, my cock pulsing in my sweats from the mere thought of her.

“You like her?”

“No,” I responded quickly.

“You are such a terrible liar.”

I straightened my back a little more, finally looking away from her. “She’s just a friend.”

“You know, I remember you telling me about a girl named Jenny when you were in fifth grade. I remember because it was the happiest I’d seen you since Sam passed away. You said she was nice to you, unlike the other kids in your class. That she let you swing with her and that she even stood up for you. I remember it because you couldn’t stop talking about it. You even asked if she could come over one weekend, but I told you it was a bad idea. You really liked that girl.”

“That… was a different Jenny.”

She laughed again. “I’m sure you don’t know that many Jenny’s in Fox River.”

“I’ve had lots of girlfriends, Grandma.” That was a lie. I’d only had two, but technically they weren’t really girlfriends. I just let them believe they were so I could get easy pussy.

“All named Jenny?” She grinned.

I waved a hand, pushing out of my chair. “No. It’s not like that,” I said, picking up a few of the pots and pans I knocked down. I set everything on the counter and then grabbed a bowl from the cabinet above. I placed it on the counter, dumping the sugared corn flakes into it. “She’s just really persistent and I don’t want to hurt her feelings so—”

“Since when do you care about not hurting anyone’s feelings?” I glimpsed back and she was still smiling. I fought a laugh, taking out the jug of milk.

I turned for my chair again, sticking my spoon in the bowl. “Just know it’s not like that. I have more important things to worry about now than some girl from grade school. Like your
health
and the bills.”

“Yeah,” she breathed, standing. I started to help her up but, as always, she shooed my hand away, going for the exit of the kitchen. “You keep telling yourself that, but from what I was hearing you say in your sleep, this Jenny girl is much more to you than just some
friend
. You care about her, and you can pretend that you don’t, but you’ll only be hurting yourself in the end.”