Discern (43 page)

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Authors: Samantha Shakespeare

BOOK: Discern
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“You’ve never failed me,” I said breathlessly.

Our lips touched softly at first, but became more forceful as the passion of the moment heated up. My hands wandered, feeling all the hard ridges of his muscular chest. His hand slid through my hair and he wound several stands around his fist, slightly tugging and intensifying the moment. Our lips pressed harder against one another’s. He pushed against my back, nearly slamming his chest against mine.

My hands wandered upward to his luscious golden locks. I, too, wrapped my fingers around several strands and gave a light pull, once again intensifying the moment. Our kiss abruptly ended. He casually returned me to my previous seat on the couch.

“What happened?” I asked, watching him walk away.

“My strength is weakening,” he sighed.

“Oh,” I said softly, unsure of what he meant. “Is it time to take a soul?” I asked nervously.

He burst in to laughter and rushed to my side. He continued to laugh, which now was insulting.

“Why are you laughing?” I hissed.

He pressed his lips tightly forming a straight line. His eyes had returned to emeralds once more. I assumed our passionate moment was over. “Sorry, please forgive me.”

“I didn’t realize that killing a human was so humorous,” I said horrified.

“Haley, I wasn’t laughing at the act of killing a mort…human. It was the idea that after we just shared that wonderful moment, you thought that I was preoccupied in thought about hunting human souls,” he smiled tenderly.

“Oh,” I said aloud, feeling foolish.

“I’ll always abide by your wishes, but there are times when it’s harder than others,” he grinned widely. “And it was very, very difficult to break away from that moment. I feared if we continued that I wouldn’t be able to stop. And I don’t want to rush you in to something you’re not completely ready for.”

“But I am ready.”

“You aren’t.”

“And why not?” I asked sharply.

“You will be, once I prove to you that you’ll be safe and so will humanity,” he said as he caressed the back of my hand.

“What if…” He placed his finger over my lips.

“I won’t fail, you won’t die and neither will mankind. And after I prove this to you, you’ll be ready.”

“Your success doesn’t dictate when I’ll be ready,” I challenged.

“No, and it shouldn’t, but I can’t give you the proper human ceremony to bond us until after I deal with the situation at hand.” His smile faded as he thought of his journey ahead.

“I don’t need that anymore. It’s silly after what I’ve seen to believe that someone with a certificate which legalizes their ability to perform marriages would ever bond us any closer than our souls already are at this very moment.”

“I don’t have a soul,” he said flatly.

“I don’t believe that for a second.”

“I really don’t,” he insisted.

I lightly ran my finger along his gray, tight fitting shirt that clung to his muscular back. I perched my body on my knees and leaned my chest up against his back. I ran my fingers through his hair and gently kissed the top of his head. I leaned down resting my lips against his ear. “Whatever it is that allows you to love is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen and is the reason my soul yearns to be with you,” I whispered.

He effortlessly swung my body around and rested it in his lap again, cradling me like a baby. “The beauty you might see is pale in comparison to yours,” he said softly as he pressed his lips atop my head. “Nothing or no one is more beautiful than you.”

The sun had set long ago. “It’s been a long day,” I yawned.

Releasing his tight grip and setting my weak, tired body on the soft cushions of the couch, he glanced up at the clock. “We should get back to your house before your father grows worried.”

“He isn’t too worried,” I sighed.

“Why not?”

“He isn’t home and won’t be for a few days,” I answered. My father had texted me a couple of hours ago saying he was leaving town tonight. His method of delivering the message was odd.

“Where did he go?”

“Vegas,” I replied. He usually went this time of year for car conventions and gambling, but I suspected there were other reasons for this trip, besides business.

“Alone?”

“Not sure, but probably with Evelyn,” I replied, trying to muffle my disapproval.

“Are you okay with that?” he asked, reaching for my hand.

“Yeah, it’s a little unsettling, but he’s a grown man, and I can’t deny him his happiness.”

“Do you not have someone in your life making you happy?” His eyes stared intensely.

‘Yes,” I blushed—but Andrew wasn’t just someone—he was everything to me.

“I was worried you would say no.”

“Why?” I asked stunned.

“I worry my presence has put a strain on your life,” he sighed.

“No, you make me feel alive again,” I assured.

“I know how you feel.”

“Well, at least we have the house to ourselves,” I smiled.

“We usually do,” he smirked.

“True.”

“Are you ready?” he smiled as he placed the journal in my lap and lifted me off the couch.

He tucked my body inside his arms, cradling me. I pressed my head against his chest and closed my eyes. I inhaled deeply as our bodies swiftly moved.

My bed was how I left it this morning, unmade. “Sorry,” I said, gesturing toward the untidiness of my room.

“I should be the one apologizing. I keep you away from your house too long,” he said as he began straightening out the white down comforter on my bed.

I rushed over embarrassed. “I’ll take care of it.”

“I’ve got it,” he smiled nervously, taking a seat.

“Something wrong?” I asked, feeling a little tension.

“I haven’t been completely truthful with you, and it’s been bothering me.”

“Does this have anything to do with what Holden mentioned about my eyes?” My voice was hopeful.

“Yes,” he sighed. “Human’s eyes change when we become intimate with them. Only we can tell this difference; it’s sort of a territorial marking,” he explained.

“Does intimacy alter a soul?” My voice cracked.

“Temporarily.”

“Is this why you haven’t pressed the subject?” I asked, feeling slightly betrayed.

“Not completely. I would’ve given in long ago if that’s what you desired, but your intent on staying pure has been a relief.”

“Why?”

“Your abilities are rare, and if we took that next step, then I fear it could alter them and leave you weak and vulnerable,” he admitted. “I can’t have that happen…not now.”

“So we’ll never be able to…” I stopped.

“One day, but not until I straighten several things out.”

“I guess my silly traditional ideologies have actually saved my life,” I smirked.

“It would appear so,” he grinned. “Just having you in my life again is enough.”

“Would you want to be intimate with another?” I asked, fearing his response.

“Haley, why in the world would you ask that?” he asked, more hurt than angry.

“Because, it’s happened before.”

“I’m not Braden, and I wish you didn’t compare the two situations,” he grimaced. “I’m not a human man, so therefore I don’t need to be intimate. I only did it to pass time after she died, and there’s no mortal or immortal woman that could compare to how I feel for you. No one else would be good enough,” he confessed.

“I feel the same way,” I admitted. “But I do wish for us to be intimate one day,” I blushed.

“Don’t get me wrong, so do I, and it will happen.” He lightly traced my lips with his finger.

“Hopefully before I’m forty,” I said, enjoying his slight touch. I refrained from allowing my thoughts to wander about what our intimacy would be like—his touch was heated enough.

“I’m not talking about years, maybe months,” he smiled.

“Oh,” I said surprised, realizing it would be sooner than I anticipated.

“Is that too soon?”

“No, it just sounds weird to plan out something so emotional.”

He laughed lightly. “Isn’t that what you were planning with marriage?”

“Oh, yeah,” I sighed. “I guess it just feels so different now. I never thought I’d ever feel this way.”

“That’s what love is supposed to feel like,” he smiled. “At least what I know about it.”

“The feeling is stronger than I ever imagined.”

“Love is powerful,” he agreed. “And the word seems weak compared to how I feel for you.”

“It does,” I agreed, slightly yawning.

“Oh, Haley, you must be so tired.”

“I am a little,” I admitted.

“Go to sleep.”

I laid my head down on the pillow, feeling the cool pillowcase against my face. He slid into the bed beside me. His warm chest gently touched my back. “Goodnight my love,” he whispered in my ear before softly kissing my cheek.

“I love you,” I whispered. My eyelids were heavy, and I could no longer fight the urge to sleep.

22

 

Gone

 
 

I sprinted up several flights of stairs, almost knocking down a few meddling students. I could feel my chest expanding as I inhaled deeply. I hadn’t run this fast since the day I fled Braden’s apartment.

I rushed into the open doorway of room 202 to find Andrew sitting behind his desk. I quickly scanned the room to see if any other students were seated. To my relief no one had arrived yet.

“What happened?” I gasped, trying to catch my breath. “I’ve been calling you all day.”

“Sorry, I had to meet with a few business associates,” he answered flatly, casually glancing up at me. “I had forgotten all about these papers I needed to grade,” he said, holding up the stack.

His demeanor was unusual. He seemed distant and cold.

 
“You couldn’t call me to let me know?” I asked hurt.

“Sorry, Haley, I was busy.” His reply was icy.

I slammed my books down on his desk as hard as I could. “What’s wrong with you?” I seethed.

“Calm yourself,” he hissed under his breath.

I heard footsteps. One of my classmates was entering the room. I had never seen this side of him—not even the day Mr. Mitchell discovered our relationship was he this cold. I glanced back over my shoulder to see if my classmate was paying any attention to us, but she was digging through her purse.

I took this opportunity and pulled Andrew’s face to me. “What are you doing?” he said furiously.

“They’re black!” I gasped.

His eyes were black. There was no beautiful sparkle of any color. I would have even taken red at this very moment. Anger was better than hopelessness or uncertainty.

“Go take your seat,” he commanded.

“No.” I stormed out of the room, desperately hoping he would follow so I could have some time alone with him. I flew down the hall as fast as I could walk. I looked behind to see if he was following. There was no sign of him.

I turned back around trying to figure out what my next move would be. “Oh crap!” I shouted.

Andrew stood in front of me. His eyes were now red crystals. His nostrils flared. He nearly slung me inside the open janitor’s closet.

“What’s wrong with you?” he snarled.

“Your attitude,” I answered icily.

His eyes darkened from red back to black. “I have to leave for a few days,” he said, clinching the sleeve of my pink, puffy jacket.

My face dropped, and I started to panic. “Why?”

He looked away momentarily before answering. “A mission for the government.”

“Can I come with you?”

“No,” he said, shaking his head.

“How long have you known about this?”

“They told me this afternoon.”

“It took all day?”

 
“There were lots of details to go over,” he frowned.

“Why are your eyes black?”

“I’m not happy about this. I don’t like being away from you for such a long length of time.”

“Why are you being so cold?” I asked hurt.

“I thought maybe if you were angry with me, the time apart would be more bearable for you.”

I playfully smacked his arm. “Don’t do that again,” I sighed, resting my head against his warm chest. “You scared me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I thought missions only took hours?” I asked, remembering back to a previous conversation.

“This is a detailed one with human involvement, so I can’t just go in undetected and take care of business. It’s really quite frustrating.”

“When will you be back?”

“Hopefully by Sunday; Monday at the latest.”

“Oh,” I breathed. “When do you leave?”

“Tonight.”

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