DIARY OF AN OXYGEN THIEF By Anonymous (The Oxygen Thief Diaries) (17 page)

at them like they’re playing tennis.The Kilkenny man is obeying some voice he only acknowledges days later, do not drink that. He's not thirsty. He has after all drank about five pints of the stuff already. Vodka isn't supposed to have a smell. AA is full of people who used to believe this. That's the very reason they so vehemently downed the stuff. An alcoholic doesn’t want to smell like booze. Funny really, you'd have thought we

wouldn't care.

             
But one little trick you learn if you don't want to start drinking again is to get into the habit of smelling everything you drink.

             
Even tea.

             
It's a good habit. Might save your life.

             
So here's the thing...if this gets published then the likelihood is they won't publish her book of photo-essays because her methods were exposed. Or if they do, then at least I’ll get the first word in, and I will have aired all my feelings about what happened. If this doesn't get published, then her book will probably come out in a year or so and I'll be humiliated or at least mildly embarrassed and she'll be the victor and I will remain in awe of her forever. On the other hand, if you are reading this, then it not only got published but I'm now working either on my next book or the screenplay for this one.

           Congratulate me.