Authors: Goldie Alexander
Next morning as I’m
searching in my bag for something halfway decent to wear, I try hard to pretend
nothing happened. But of course it did, and it’s too late wishing it hadn’t. In
the bustle of getting ready for the cruise, I hope the others won’t notice the
way Sacha keeps giving me soppy looks. ‘Anything happen last night?’ I ask
Kaz.
Jodie answers
for her, ‘Some kid got drowned.’
‘How come?’
Sacha’s eyes never leave me.
‘He went surfing
by himself,’ says Kaz. ‘Got sucked under by a giant wave.’
I don’t dare
meet Sacha’s intense gaze. ‘Will you please hurry,’ I butt in. ‘Laura will be
here any minute now. Don’t forget your bathers.’
‘I won’t be able
to swim,’ Jodie whines. ‘Not with my infection.’
Kaz goes
bug-eyed. ‘That’s your fault, isn’t it?’
‘I’m going down
to the foyer.’ I go to the bedroom to throw some clothes into a bag.
Sacha follows.
‘You won’t need all that stuff, will you?’
I can’t look at
him. ‘I’m going to stay with my dad a day or two.’
He sits on the
bed and stares at me like a whipped dog. ‘But…but what about us?’
I hate the way
he looks at me, mostly because it makes me feel so cubist distorted. What can
be worse than unwanted affection? Last night, did Abdul feel like that when I
phoned? I try not to think about it. But I don’t want to lead Sacha on any further.
I like him too much and want to keep him as a special friend. ‘Well, there’s no
way you can stay with me, Sash,’ I say as gently as I know how. ‘My father
wouldn’t approve. Besides…’ it’s hard to look at his mournful face, ‘I don’t
really know my dad any more. We’ve got to get to know each other again.
‘Sure…course.’
He accepts this
explanation far too quickly to appease my conscience. I mentally kick myself.
If only last night hadn’t happened. I could kick myself for being a fool.
‘When will you
be back?’
‘In a couple of
days.’
Downstairs,
Laura is already waiting. ‘Hi gang,’ she says and we all pile into the Jeep.
‘You didn’t
introduce me,’ Sacha whispers. He sounds so desolate I have to force myself not
to give in to his distress. But if I don’t want lead him on, what else can I
do?
We head off down
the highway to a spot on the river just near the entrance to the Broadwater.
Laura leads the party down one of the jetties to a big catamaran. I spot my
father leaning on a rail waving. He looks so good, I can’t help a surge of
pride. Deckhands are busy untying ropes. We troop on board. Robert points us to
a cluster of deck chairs. Kaz settles into the nearest. ‘How about a drink?’
‘Bar’s not open
yet,’ Laura says shortly. ‘We have to be on the water. You can wait until then,
can’t you?’
I glare at Kaz.
‘Sure we can.’
This trip is
spectacular. We pass homes reaching right down to the riverbank; palatial
houses with swimming pools, many with sleek boats moored at their private
jetties. I could be part of all this! Then I shove the thought away. What if it
corrupts my art?
The boat picks
up speed and the Broadwater opens out ahead. Laura comes around with savories
and Kaz works her way through several vodka-oranges. When we arrive at
Tipplers, a barbecue is quickly set up. When Dad joins us, Sacha says, ‘Great
place, Mr Simpson.’
‘Call me Rob,’
he says. ‘We’ll be here for a couple of hours. That path will take you to the
surf beach. Don’t swim. It’s not patrolled.’
‘Feel like a
walk, Emma?’ Sacha whispers.
I feel so bad
about pushing him away, I agree. As we walk Sacha says ‘You’re lucky, your dad
being so cool.’
‘Oh I don’t
know. He’s okay now. But he left us in the lurch, and now he wants me to stay
up here.’
‘I’d stay if I
had the chance,’ he says. We’ve finally reached the surf and are lying in the
shallows. ‘I don’t want to go back to Melbourne.’ His face clouds over. ‘I
won’t get into any uni. And you know what? I don’t care. Maybe I’ll ask your
dad for a job. I can do the same stuff as those guys on the boat.’
I sit up. ‘But
what about your art?’
‘Lots of artists
work at other jobs before they settle down. They use the experience. I’d keep
on sketching, you know.’
I frown, still
trying to put him off. ‘How do you know you’d be any good on a boat?’
‘After all that
gym work, I’m pretty strong. What do you reckon, Emma? Could you put in a good
word for me? He’s suddenly full of purpose. ‘Will you, Emma? Please?’
I refuse to meet
his gaze. ‘I don’t know, Sacha. It’s not really up to me, is it?’
‘He can only say
no, can’t he? Maybe I could come back with you tonight?’
‘Let me think
about it, Sacha,’ I say trying to ignore his hangdog look. My problem is he
knows too much about my earlier escapades. The last thing I want is him
spilling the beans. Still, he might really like it up here and it’s hard not to
feel mean. Thankfully he doesn’t push and we wander back towards the boat to be
met by Kaz who’s drunk too much and is furious at being left behind. Plus a
sober, if sulky, Jodie.
Laura and Dad are openly
relieved to see us. ‘What have you two been up to eh?’ Dad asks jocularly, but
I note the alarm in his voice, as if he’s suddenly realised I’m all grown up.
Then he goes off to fire the engines that will take the boat back to its
moorings.
Back in Melbourne, I fire up the
bathroom’s ancient hot water system. Jeremy bangs on the door and hands me the
phone.
Abdul! He’s found time to
see me after all. Heart racing, I wrap a towel around myself, and take the
call.
‘Hi! It’s me. Where were you
last night? Didn’t Hannah tell you I phoned?’
‘Emma!’ In a heart-dropping
burst of disappointment, I try to calm my racing pulse. ‘Oh, they always
forget.’
‘Yeah, well.’ Emma sounds
exasperated. ‘How you are?’
‘Fine.’ I wrap my towel
more firmly around myself and sink to the floor.
‘Doing your exercises?’
‘Course. Don’t nag.’
Emma gives her abrupt
laugh. My pulse starts to slow down. I ask, ‘How come you’re not on your cell
phone?’
‘It’s dead. Anyway, I’m
sleeping over at Dad’s so I can use his landline.’
‘How is it up there?’ I ask
cautiously.
‘Total luxury. Wait till
you see it.’
‘Can hardly. What’s Surfers
like?’
‘Hot. Lots of kids getting
stoned and throwing up. Toolies everywhere. We mostly stay out of things.’
‘Sounds great!’ I can’t
avoid an envious twinge. ‘How are the others?’
‘Fine. Well, except for
Jodie. She got a navel ring and now it’s infected. She’s on antibiotics and
can’t drink.’
I laugh. ‘What about Kaz?’
‘She drinking enough for
everyone.’
‘Ouch! How’s Sash?’
‘Oh, he’s on a high. He’s
discovered the casino.’
‘You kidding? Has he lost
heaps?’
‘He’s winning. Shouted me
dinner last night. And today Dad took all of us out on the boat to Tipplers.
You should see the houses fronting the canal, total luxury.’
‘So you’re having a ball.’
I allow my envy to hang out. Anyway, won’t this stop Emma asking awkward
questions? I can hardly believe my cunning…
‘Yeah... well, lots of
partying for us. We’re planning a visit to Warner Studios. Two new clubs and
an open-air concert. Shame you’re not here. I’m really missing you.’
I don’t bother commenting.
‘Tell me more about Kaz.’
‘Like I said, she’s
drinking heaps and you know how aggro she can get. Sends her love. She’s keen
on this dread-lock singer called Brodie, only I don’t think he’s actually planning
on hanging around.’
I giggle. ‘Poor Kaz. Give
her my sympathies.’
There’s a long pause. I
know something will now come up I can’t respond to honestly.
‘Listen,’ says Emma. ‘I
phoned Abdul’s landline, and he was distant, cold, like he couldn’t wait to
hang up. I’m just wondering...’ Her voice trails away.
My mouth goes dry. ‘Maybe
he was busy.’
‘Maybe. Could you ring him
and see? He might be sick or something.’
‘Sure,’ I say a little too
smoothly. ‘What do you want me to say?’
‘Just tell him Hi. Find out
what’s up, will you?’
‘I’ll do it right off.’ I
can’t wait to hang up. I feel so bad, in another minute I’ll blurt everything
out. ‘Dad’s yelling for this phone,’ I say quickly. ‘I’ll call later. Promise.’
‘You will phone Abdul?’
‘Said I would, didn’t I?
Okay Dad,’ I call. Then back into the phone, ‘Tell the others I’m missing them.
Love you heaps. If your cell phone’s out, email me.’
I drop the receiver as if
it’s too hot to handle. Which in a way it is.
But isn’t this the result
of Chaos Theory? If it hadn’t rained that heavily, Emma would never have bummed
a lift from Jon, we would never have had that accident, I wouldn’t have a
broken ankle, we’d both have worked in the same supermarket where I would’ve
met Abdul before Emma. How unlucky can two best friends be?
Half an hour later I’m fixing my face
when I hear footsteps.
Julie Simpson opens the
door.
I drop my lip-gloss and
scramble about on the floor to pick it up, no easy task with a leg in an
awkward plastic boot.
Julie has her usual untidy
look: floaty clothes that look wrong on her plump body, her long curly hair
flecked with grey. ‘Hi, darling. Where you off to?’
‘Hi Julie.’ Almost
impossible not to look guilty. ‘Heard from Emma?’
‘No… nothing in the last
few days.’ Her face falls into discontented lines. ‘You’d think she’d bother to
phone. Oh well, daughters…’ A theatrical sigh, then she lightens up, ‘Where are
you going?’
I swallow. ‘Out to dinner.
Nowhere much.’
‘Nowhere much?’ She rocks
back on downtrodden heels. ‘Can’t recall the last time someone took me out to
dinner. Anyway, since my belly reducing diet, it’s probably for the best. I
always go for the dessert.’
Relieved we’re on a safe
topic, I cry, ‘Me too…mud-cake.’
‘Cheesecake.’
‘Tiramisu.’
We share a grin. Both Julie
and Emma have violet eyes, pretty perky noses and generous wide mouths; there’s
no mistaking the mother-daughter relationship. But while Emma is truly pretty
and Julie would be too, she has unfortunately, to quote Nanna Pearl, ‘Let
herself go’.
I wake up she’s saying in
her little-girl voice, ‘Just came by to see how you are.’
‘I’m fine, Julie. I really
am.’ We hug and I take in Julie’s familiar feel and smell. What if I was to
lose the woman almost as close to me as my own mother? But what can you do if
you fall in love with your best friend’s guy?
‘Look,’ Julie is saying. ‘I
don’t want to ring Surfers, have Emma think I hate her living with her dad.’
‘Course not,’ I say though
when Robert took off with Laura, Julie was so angry anyone would think him the
husband from hell.
‘Emma’s got this new guy,
Abdul. You know how over the top she can get. If you should happen to speak
with her let me know.’
‘Course,’ I say scarcely
believing how sincere I sound.
Julie kisses my cheek and
leaves. The front door closes. A few minutes later, Hannah stalks into the
bedroom. ‘Really Dessi, you’ve placed me in a very difficult situation.’
I scowl ferociously. ‘What
do you mean?’
‘This Abdul. Let’s get one
thing straight. Whose boyfriend is he?’
‘It’s not like that…’
‘So what it’s like?’ A long
silence. ‘Abdul’s nice, but is he really worth it?’
Hard meeting Hannah’s angry
face. ‘Before you met Dad, didn’t you and Julie like the same guy?’
‘Course.’ Hannah holds my
gaze in the mirror. ‘I never did anything about it.’
‘How did you stop
yourself?’
‘I just did. Anyway,’ she
turns to go, ‘You know how fragile Emma is. So be sure you know what you’re
doing.’
I nod mutely. I understand
all right. But no one, nothing, is going to stop me seeing Abdul.
In Abdul’s van some hours later I say,
‘It’s like I’m betraying the whole family. We’ve never had anything like this
happen before.’
‘Not ever?’
‘Never. We always tell each
other everything.’
‘You never lie to each
other?’
‘What’s the point of having
a best friend if you lie to her?’