Demons Prefer Blondes (25 page)

“Lucy was kidnapped by a couple of Belial’s minions. They’re taking her to Hell. We need your help.”

“
¡Ay, Dios mío!
” A string of other words Rafael didn’t recognize rang in his ear. Frankie’s frantic voice muffled in the background. “Lucy’s been kidnapped.”

There was no mistaking Frankie’s gasp in the background. “What happened?”

“
Un momento
,” Gerardo rattled off.

The scraping sounds of the phone shuffling scratched in his ear. In the background, Gerardo quickly relayed a brief and completely paraphrased explanation. “See! We have to go. Right?”

In truth, he didn’t like bringing humans into a demon’s battle, but he had no choice—not if he wanted to save Lucy.

“Yes, Lucy’s life depends on it.”

On the other end of the line, more hushed arguments followed by more scuffling. Now wasn’t the time to argue over a phone.

“What do we have to do?” Frankie’s usually soft southern lilt screamed urgency.

“We need you to take us to Hell, Michigan.”

“Hell? You’re joking. It’s way out in the boonies. There’s nothing there.”

How wrong Frankie was. “There is now, and we haven’t much time. Kalli and I are on our way. Be ready in—” He reached in his pocket and pulled out his old timepiece, the one he’d cherished for so long—the one given to him by the enemy. He flung it against the wall, metal, glass, and gears flying and skittering across the floor. “Five minutes.” With that, he clicked the button to disconnect the call.

Kalli stood there, arms crossed, twirling her lip ring with her tongue. “That’s an antique, you know.”

“It’s worth naught but a bitter reminder of a love that never was. I’d rather let go of the past and move on to the future.”

“Fair enough.” Kalli slinked over to the broken bits and scooped them up. “Always cleaning up after you, aren’t I?”

“Whatever, Kalli. We need to go.
Now.
”

“Certainly.” Bowing her head, she raised her arms and shot her hands toward the ceiling. In a swirl of ice, snow, and frost, she vanished.

Summoning the portals, Rafael allowed the frigid wind, ice, and freezing snow to surround him and pull him through the portal. The sooner he slipped through, the better.

Winds, bitter and cold, lapped at his skin. Sleet licked at his face. Ice twined its way through his hair. The tunnel, which normally transferred him in seconds, seemed to be taking minutes… no,
hours
. Had traveling always taken this long? Bloody hell.
Time doesn’t fly when the woman you love is in danger.

Allowing the winds to spin around him and reanimate his human form, he closed his eyes. It was about bloody time. Swiping the ice chunks and frost from his hair and face, he opened his eyes. Kalli, twirling a coil of ratty hair, propped herself against one of the shiny silver-trimmed shampoo bowls. A scowl etched her face.

“We’ve got bigger problems.”

Shaking the rest of the ice from his clothing, Rafael groaned. This didn’t sound good. Should he ask? “What is it?”

“Serah and Squeaky are missing.”

“Are we there yet?” Lucy asked for the third time, using the same annoying voice a child would use while on their way to an amusement park. But they weren’t going to an amusement park. They were going to a town in the middle of nowhere that just happened to be named Hell. Poor Belial and Lamia. They would be disappointed.

Lamia turned to glare at her and clucked her forked tongue. “Try as you may to annoy me, my dear Lucia. It won’t work.”

She arched a brow. “Are you going to silence me like you did your tool?”

“Unfortunately, no.” A wide smile crept across her face, making her look almost pretty. “Belial needs your voice intact, so you can speak your vows.”

“The only vow I’m giving him is the one where I promise to kick him back to the netherworld… preferably in his nether region.” Lucy flashed her own sweet smile. “After sending you there first, of course.”

Too bad they still had her cuffed. Her fingers curled and clenched. She kicked at the back of the driver’s seat, the silver chains clanging in a rhythmic tone that taunted her, driving her to the breaking point.

The bitch was going down. Lucy angled a glance toward the passenger seat, where Larissa slept, a peaceful expression sweeping across her
angelic
face.
And her little friend too.
When she woke up, of course. Lucy wanted her to remember the beatdown she deserved. For the hell she’d put her friends through, but especially for the torment and agony she’d inflicted on Rafe. And that was truly unforgivable.

“Strong, aren’t they?” Lamia threw her head back, her cackle reverberating in Lucy’s ears. “Forged in the pits of Hell. Amazing, huh?”

Poor demon that had to make these things.
It probably killed them. “Yeah, amazing, considering demons are
allergic
to silver.”

“Only on Earth, my dear. When we are in our natural habitat, we can touch silver all day long, if we choose.”

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Lucky you!” With as much strength as she could, she lugged her shackled legs up onto the seat. If only she and Rafe had had more time. She could’ve gone to see those Fore-Demons and accept the Paladin way. Then these cuffs would be history and she’d be kicking some snake-lady ass. If only her dad would’ve been more honest with her mom and her. Now wasn’t the time for blame, though.

Now was the time to kick Lamia’s scaly ass. With a determined smirk, Lucy pulled her legs up. Luckily for her, Larissa had inadvertently left just enough slack for her to be deadly. And here she used to think the pretty little blonde was smart. Who knew clichés could be so true.

“So, are we there yet?”

Lamia straightened in her seat, her hands gripping the steering wheel like two giant vices.

Lucy’s grin spread wider. She almost had Lamia where she wanted her. “Well?”

One.

“Well?”

Two.

“Are we? Huh? Are we?”

Three.

“Well, are—”

“
Shut up you insolent bitch!
” Lamia whipped around to face her, her red eyes swirling.
Perfect!

Wrenching her legs apart, she pulled herself around. Hopefully she could channel some of those ninja moves she discovered earlier. She arched her back and bent her knees, lightly grazing against the back of Lamia’s seat.

“Why the hell are you squirming? Is the princess scared?” Lamia eyes blazed bright, further fueling Lucy’s ire.

She had two choices: Either sit still in the backseat like a weak-minded fool while Lamia drove her to certain death. Oh, Lamia could try and sugarcoat the whole marriage thing, but knowing Belial, he had no intentions of providing his new bride a life of wedded bliss.

The second option? Surprising Lamia with a swift kick to her head. With a quick shake of her shackled ankles, she hid her smile in the darkness.

Either way, death was imminent. And Lucy would rather go down now, before Belial could do whatever it was he needed to do with the
Arca Inferorum
. She twisted her wrists behind her and cracked her knuckles.

“I’m not scared, but you should be,” she muttered beneath her breath. She heaved her legs up further and did something she hadn’t done in a long time. She prayed.

She prayed like she’d never prayed before. She prayed for the strength her father had to leave her mother and her. She prayed for Rafe’s courage. She prayed that she could channel even an inch of his resolve. She only hoped whoever was listening hadn’t completely given up on her.

“What was that?” Lamia barked.

Now or never.
With a quick jerk, she launched her legs higher in the air. Tumbling against the hard backseat cushion, she kicked her feet out. Neck kinked to the left, she swung her legs across the top of the driver’s seat.

Crack!

The heel of her tennis shoe slammed against Lamia’s ear, sending her head flinging to the side. Another loud crunch echoed as her head smashed against the window. Wrenching her neck around, Lamia growled, loud and primal. Clawed fingers reached out and snaked around Lucy’s leg, hurling her body to the floor.

Struggling to maintain her balance, Lucy wrestled with the handcuffs that bound her wrists. Lamia, her body snaking and slithering, hovered over her, spittle and blood dripping from her scaly lips onto Lucy’s already bloodied sweater. The car swayed and swerved with each movement. This wouldn’t be good at all.

“What would Belial say?”

A loud hiss ground from Lamia’s lips. “Belial is a fool, but he needs you.”

“The tool calling Belial a fool. Ha-ha! Very funny.”

“Don’t make me slap you.”

“Maybe I’m into that kinky shit.”

Her scaly hand lashed out and snaked around Lucy’s neck, pulling her eye-to-eye with her crimson one. Eyes flashing, Lamia’s fingers coiled around her neck, tightening their slithering grip.

A niggling deep within Lucy’s brain poked and prodded, even as she choked and gasped for fleeting air. How the hell was Lamia still driving?

“You…” Lamia squeezed her neck tighter. “are…” She shook Lucy’s head like she was James Bond’s favorite martini. “…a bloody fool.” With that, Lamia’s slithering fingers loosened, sending her crashing to the floor.

The car careened and swerved, sending her head sailing against the back door. “What the heck?” she muttered, wishing desperately that her hands were free to massage her aching skull.

Another swerve sent the car jerking to the left. Lucy’s head banged against the passenger side door and her back cracked against hard floor.

“Shit!” Lamia’s shrill exclamation shredded Lucy’s eardrums.

Tires squealing, the car veered to the right. A horn honked. Like an overused rag doll, Lucy’s body crumpled, slamming against the other side. Her head swam, her back ached, and her fists clenched.

Plastic and metal ripped and twisted in an agonizing cacophony, the impact pulsing in her ears. Lamia’s body catapulted forward, then back, her loud hiss reverberating throughout the tiny confines of the car. Or was that the radiator?

“Bloody fool!” Lamia, in her true form, hovered over her, slithering like a snake being charmed from a basket.

One thing was different. Lucy certainly wasn’t the one doing the charming. Hauling herself up, she stared her in her slitted eyes. “I did that on purpose.”

“Oh, I’m sure you did.” Lamia’s forked tongue darted out and whipped Lucy’s nose. “Belial won’t like this.”

Lucy’s eyebrow quirked up. “I thought you didn’t give a shit about Belial.”

Lamia’s scaly tail lashed out and wrapped around her neck, pulling her closer, the grip tightening. “If it weren’t for the treasures he was offering, I’d kill you right now.”

She opened her mouth to offer her usual bit of sarcasm, but only managed an intelligible gasp. Wow. Lamia finally found a way to shut her up. Score one for Lamia, much to Lucy’s chagrin.

Lamia’s tail loosened its grip and slithered away, returning to her slightly improved, human form. Crimson curls cascading down her head, she spread her lips into a wide smirk. “That got you to shut up, didn’t it?”

“Yes, mistress,” she coughed out.

Her red-black eyes flickered as a snarl revealed two very long pointed fangs—fangs she’d used to suck the souls from innocent children. She’d show her where to stick those fangs.

Up Larissa’s pert little ass.

As if knowing Lucy was thinking about her and that body that would make a model jealous, Larissa shifted in the passenger seat, a soft sigh escaping her too-plump lips. Why did the evil ones have to be so damned cutesy sounding?

“And, so you know, my dear Lucia.” A wry smile curved Lamia’s lips, her arm stretching and snaking around her. With absolutely no effort, she hauled Lucy up and flung her against the backseat. “Nothing you say or attempt to do will stop us. The Infernati will prevail.”

“We’ll see about that.”

“Oh, yes we will.” Her greenish-gray tail slinked and slithered across Lucy’s cheek, the cool smooth skin sending shivers of revulsion coursing through her. Lucy fought with every fiber of her being to keep the bile from rising to her throat.

The trilling of a cell phone broke the silence. With an aggravated huff, Lamia pulled her appendage away from Lucy’s face and snatched up the phone, her body slithering back into its human form.

She clicked the button and jerked the phone to her ear. “Speak.” A mortified gasp blew from her mouth. “My apologies. I didn’t realize it was you.” She flashed a warning glare.

Tool, indeed.

Lamia continued her conversation. “There’s a slight delay.”

Slight delay, my ass.

Peering over the car seat and out the cracked windshield, Lucy attempted to survey the damage. Steam rolled from beneath the hood as the car creaked, clanked, and shuddered. The passenger side door dangled precariously, allowing cold gusts of air to hit her face. Shock had clearly hit.

“Your
bride
managed to get us in an accident.” Lamia scraped her clawed fingers through her blood red curls. “Is this worth it, my prince?”

Lucy chuckled to herself. Lamia, for as much as she claimed to be all for her own glory, she had herself firmly wrapped around Belial’s golden finger.

“I’m sorry, Prince. It shall not happen again.” She pushed open the door and lumbered out of the car. “I’d rather discuss this with you in private.
She’s
a handful.” With that, she slammed the door shut, the mangled hunk of metal moaning in response.

Lucy craned her head to watch Lamia pace next to the car, her claws clenching the phone. Any tighter and they’d be digging inside. She shook her head, mouthing a few unnamed curse words. With a sharp twist, she turned back toward the car, her glowing red glare boring into her. Lucy returned her glare with one of her own. Nope. She wasn’t shaking in her boots. There was too much at stake.

Cramming her phone into the pocket of the black skinny jeans that clung to her every snakelike curve, she flung the door open. “Get out, bitch. We’re going to Hell after all.”

“I’m sure
you
are.” Lucy flashed a toothy grin. “And I’m going to enjoy sending you there.”

“Ha-ha. Very funny.” With that, Lamia grabbed her by the collar of her coat and yanked her from the car. “Have you ever traveled?”

Lucy shrugged, a tiny smirk spreading across her face. “Nope. I never learned. I’m afraid you’re out of luck.”

“Oh, I have plenty of luck, Lucy.” Crimson lips spread into a wide smirk, she snapped her fingers.

With a soft gasp, Larissa jerked her head up. Scratching her head, she squinted. “Wha… What happened?”

“Stupid bitch got us in a car accident.” She narrowed her gaze and gave Lucy a searing hiss. “We have to travel now.”

Rubbing her eyes, Larissa let out a long drawn out yawn. “How’d that happen?”

“Never mind that,” Lamia barked. “Get the hell out of the car.”

With a quick jolt, Larissa reached for the door handle and pulled. Yanking and jerking the handle, she grumbled beneath her breath. “Bloody hell. The door’s stuck.” Pushing and pulling, she fought the crumpled scrap of metal.

“Incompetent!” Lamia growled. “Can’t you do anything right?”

With a soft yelp, Larissa flinched, her rosy red lips forming a tiny pout. “Yes,” she mumbled, exhaustion and frustration creasing her brow. If she hadn’t been such a bitch, Lucy might have felt sorry for her.

But beneath that beauty and grace lay a monster. A vicious heartless monster who’d hurt someone she loved. A wound she’d let fester for over two hundred years. If it weren’t for the cuffs, she’d give her three hundred years of wounds. Unfortunately, even that wouldn’t be enough to make up for the abuse she’d put Rafe through.

With a groan, Larissa heaved herself over the gearshift and plopped down into the driver’s seat. Swinging to the side, she pushed herself out of the car. “Are we close enough?”

“At this point, I don’t fucking care.” Lamia growled out. Her talons gripping into Lucy’s shoulder blades, she yanked her to her. Her forked tongue lashing out, she hissed. “Either way, she dies.” She leaned in close, her cold, lifeless breath crawling against her skin. “Yes, you’ll die, and it’ll bring me much pleasure.”

Adrenaline pounded through Lucy. “What did I ever do to you?”

Lamia jerked her head to meet her red-rimmed glare. “You were born.”

“Don’t blame me for that.”

“If you weren’t born I’d be the Sexubi Queen.” Larissa sauntered to stand next to her mistress, her true self shining through. Pristine pale skin swirled and molded into green scales. Spiked tale whipping back and forth, her pupils narrowed to tiny slits.

“Instead, you’re the Lizard Queen. Sucks to be you, huh?”

Lamia grumbled, her other hand literally snaking out to stroke Larissa’s scaly cheek. “Now, now. You remember our plan, my dear.”

Larissa’s gaze shifted to the ground. “Yes, mistress. I remember.”

Lamia’s lips slithered into a sly smile. “Good.”

“So what was your plan?” Lucy asked, cocking her head to the side.

Lamia’s tail slithered and twined around her leg. “We were going to kill your father so I could take over the kingdom.”