Deeper (28 page)

I
covered his hand with mine and said, “I really don’t see that happening, Kris.
You are going to be the best dad and our child will adore you.”

“You
think so?”

“I
know so,” I said, and just as I was about to lean in to kiss him, the baby
kicked. I’d been feeling it for a while but when I saw the surprise on Kris’
face, I knew he’d felt it too.

“Was
that what I think it was?” he asked softly. When I felt another nudge in my
belly and he gasped, I smiled widely and felt sheer bliss flowing through me.

“I
think our baby just said hello to Daddy for the first time,” I answered
happily.

Kris’
demeanor instantly changed as his guilt and sadness was replaced with pure love
and complete happiness.

“That
is the most incredible thing I’ve ever felt in my life,” he whispered as our
little one continued to twirl and kick in my belly. “Jess, this is
unbelievable.”

“It
really is. I’m still in awe that this is real. I still feel like I’m dreaming
and I’m just waiting to wake up.”

He
moved his hand up and combed his fingers gently through my hair. I smiled as I
felt his erection swelling under me and I knew that our sweet bonding moment
was about to turn dirty. Some women worry about their husbands losing interest
in them the further along they are in their pregnancies, but my husband seemed
to find me more and more desirable as the months went by.

“Bedroom?”
he growled as he stood and lifted me into his arms.

I
giggled and whispered, “You’re insatiable.”

“Fucking
right I am,” he said as he carried me out of my office and up the stairs to our
bedroom.

Four Months Later-Present Day

“Thank
you again for doing this for us today,” I said to Danni, hugging her as my baby
kicked happily in my belly. “Everything was perfect.”

It
was now one week until my due date and I was so anxious to finally meet our
child that it was difficult to sit still. I absolutely loved everything about
being pregnant, but now that the end was in sight each day seemed longer than
the last. As much as I loved being Aunt Jessie to the two little ones in our
big, crazy family, it just made me ache so much more to be able to hold my own.

Right
after I found out I was pregnant, Everleigh and Ryder had welcomed their son
Max into the world on Halloween. He was such an adorable little boy and looked
so much like Ryder that it was scary.

A
month later, Danni gave birth to her and Beau’s daughter Harlowe after a pretty
dramatic delivery. She’d had a placental abruption and if Beau hadn’t come home
and found her when he did, both of them might not have made it. Harlowe was
such a beautiful little girl and I get a chill shiver every time I think about
the fact that things could’ve been so much worse and her and Danni could’ve
died.

Today
was the day of our “joint baby shower”. When Danni told me that she, Everleigh,
and Sadie wanted to have a shower for me, I knew that I wanted it to be a
family event. As much as I loved my girls, I didn’t want to spend this day
without my boys too. Ryder, Beau, and Jude had been there for me just as much
as Kris had and were my brothers in every sense of the word. I couldn’t do this
without them, and Danni graciously agreed to a joint party after I sat her and
Everleigh down and finally let them in on why it was so important to me. After
all the trauma I’d suffered in my life, my guys were my one constant and I
wasn’t going to do this without them. After Danni and Everleigh cried for a
solid half hour after I told them about losing my first child because of
Crystal’s abuse, they agreed that this was very important to me and they
planned the whole day around us being together as a family.

“I’m
so glad, and it was my pleasure. Thankfully Harlowe wasn’t too cranky today. I
think she’s cutting a tooth.”

“Oh
no, she was a perfect angel. If she was cranky I didn’t notice at all because
she’s such a sweet precious baby,” I answered as I watched Beau holding
Harlowe, who was resting her little head on his chest. I smiled as I watched my
friend carrying his sleeping baby girl in his arms and my heart warmed at the
sight. I was so glad that he’d finally had the family he’d always deserved.

“Yeah,
she’s sweet and precious when Beau’s in the room,” Danni laughed. “I know my
little girl loves me but I’m number two when Daddy’s around. It’s okay though,
it’s impossible not to love the man.”

“Very
true,” I answered, winking at Beau when he glanced at me. “Are you sure that
you don’t want me to stay and help you clean up?”

“Are
you serious? No way am I letting you lift a finger, Jessie. You’re super
pregnant and need to let Kris get you home and in bed.”

I
stifled a yawn. “Well I would argue with you, but I am feeling a little tired.
Sleep sounds amazing right about now.”

Kris
came back inside the house at that moment and walked right to me. Placing his
large hands on my belly, he said, “Okay the car is all packed. Are you ready to
head home, beautiful?”

I
nodded at him. “Yeah, I’m ready. I’m pretty wiped out.”

Everleigh
came into the room holding Max and said, “Get all the rest you can now because
that little one will be here soon and sleep will soon be a distant and fond memory.”

Laughing,
I answered, “I can’t wait for that. I’ve waited to have a baby keep me up for
so long.”

“Well
you’re almost there,” she answered and hugged me. “Get some sleep and call if
you need anything, okay? Whatever you need, you call and between Danni, Sadie,
the guys, and myself it’ll get done.”

“Thank
you Evie,” I replied and kissed her cheek before she released me. “I appreciate
that. Thank you all for today, it was wonderful. Good night to you too buddy,”
I said to Max and blew him a kiss. “You be good for Mommy and Daddy, okay?” Max
smiled and made little spit bubbles in his mouth and I chuckled.

I
said my goodbyes to everyone before Kris and I walked out the front door and to
the car. After making the short drive back to our house, he quickly led me
inside and straight to our bedroom.

“Lay
down and put your feet up,” he ordered as he grabbed a throw blanket from the
closet and unfolded it. As soon as I was lying on the bed he covered me with
the blanket and started adjusting my pillows. “Is there anything you need
before you get some rest?”

I
chuckled at him and replied, “No, Kris, I’m fine. Thank you.”

“Are
you sure? I just want you to be comfortable and get as much sleep as you can,”
he said as he continued to fuss with my pillows.

I
grabbed his wrist and placed a hand on his scratchy cheek. “Baby, I’m fine.
Wake me up in a few hours, okay?”

He
leaned down and kissed my lips sweetly. “Okay. I’m going to bring the gifts
inside and get them set up in the baby’s room. If you need anything you just
yell and I’m here.”

“I’ll
be fine. Thanks,” I said, kissing him back before yawning. “Love you.”

He
reverently rubbed my belly and gave it a kiss before saying, “Love you too,”
and leaving me to take a nap.

When
I woke up, I felt groggy before I’d even opened my eyes. I tried to stretch my
legs but they were too stiff from lying in the same position for so long. I
opened my eyes to look around and the room was pitch black. Kris was sleeping
next to me and it was as dark as midnight. I looked at the digital clock on
Kris’ side of the bed and the time read eleven-thirty. I blinked in surprise;
I’d been asleep for more than seven hours.

I
looked at Kris sleeping soundly next to me and noticed he was still in the same
clothes he’d worn all day long. He must have been so exhausted because he
hadn’t even taken off his shoes.
Poor guy
, I thought to myself. I
reached out and stroked his cheek and sighed in contentment. God I loved this
man.

As
I tried to turn to my side, I gasped as I felt a sudden gush of liquid burst
from me and my eyes went wide. After taking a few deep breaths, I reached out
to flick the lamp on and slowly sat up on the bed. I didn’t want to freak Kris
out if it was just a false alarm so I slowly stumbled to the bathroom so I
could check things out.

Once
I made it to the toilet, I pulled up my dress and lowered my panties before I
sat down. As they fell to the floor, I looked down and saw they were soaking
wet and tinged with a small amount of blood. I remembered Dr. Mitchell telling
me to look for these signs and instead of being scared or nervous, my
excitement and adrenaline took over and I knew that I needed to get ready to go
to the hospital. After I took a quick (well, as quick as I could have) shower
and I got dressed, I slowly walked into the bedroom to wake Kris up. He looked
so exhausted and I hated to wake him, but I was sure that my water had broken
and there was no time to try to ease into labor at home; I had to get to the
hospital soon.

I
walked to his side of the bed and gently shook him. “Kris? Kris, wake up.”

He
immediately jolted awake and turned to face me. “Jess? Everything okay?” he
asked groggily.

I
smiled and nodded slightly. “I’m pretty sure my water just broke.”

His
eyes widened to the size of quarters and his face went completely pale. “Fuck!
Okay, I’m up,” he said, jumping up off the bed and frantically grabbing my
hospital bag and the fully stocked diaper bag that was waiting by the bedroom
door. He was running around and gathering things up with a dazed look on his face
and I bit my lip to keep from laughing. He looked so cute in his half-crazed
state.

I
leaned against the bed and sat my bottom on the very edge of the mattress.
“Kris?”

His
eyes snapped to mine and he crossed the room in just a few steps. “Are you all right?
Are you in any pain?”

I
placed my hand on his cheek and answered, “No, Kris, I’m not in any pain yet. I
feel okay.”

“Is
there anything you need?”

“Yeah,
I kind of need you to take me to the hospital.”

Kris’
eyes glinted as he smiled at me. “Right,” he laughed. “Okay, let’s go have a
baby.”

I
leaned in and kissed his lips, lingering a little longer than I meant to. He
helped me off the bed and after he grabbed the bags we locked up the house and
made our way to the hospital to finally meet the child we so desperately hoped
for.

“Did
you call everyone yet?” I asked Kris as he walked back into my room carrying a
pitcher of ice water. I grimaced slightly as the contractions were getting
stronger and stronger. It had been three hours since I’d arrived and my
contractions were definitely intensifying. Once I arrived at the hospital and
checked in, I was quickly examined and checked into a room. After about two
hours of no progress, Dr. Mitchell had suggested that we get the contractions
going since my water had completely broken. She didn’t want the baby being in
there too long because of risks of infections and I was okay with that. I
wanted our baby getting here safely and I’d do anything I could to make sure of
that.

“Yeah,
I just got off the phone with Jude. He really wanted to be here but I told him
to just get some sleep and come after the baby’s born, just like you asked me
to. Everyone wanted to come, Jess.” He poured some ice water into my cup and I
immediately took a long satisfying drink.

“I
know they did, Kris, but it’s almost two in the morning. If everyone came
they’d have to wake up the babies or call a sitter in the middle of the night
and I don’t want them doing that. The babies might be scared if they wake up
and their parents aren’t there.”

Kris
picked up a damp cloth from the stand by the bed and dabbed it across my
sweat-covered forehead. “I get it, Jess, but…” he trailed off.

“What
is it?”

“I
just…I guess it just feels weird to not have the whole family here when our
baby is born. They all know what we went through to get here and it just
doesn’t feel right not having them here.”

“I
know, it does feel weird, but I am honestly thinking of Max and Harlowe. It’s
so hard to be here without all of my family but those little ones need their
rest. Besides, no one knows how long this labor will take and they could very
well be here before this little one is b-oh, whoa!” I stopped mid-sentence when
I was hit with another hard contraction.

Kris
grabbed my hand and said, “Just breathe, Jess. Hold onto my hand and squeeze as
hard as you need to, okay?”

I
closed my eyes and breathed as evenly as I could…shit, that one was bad. As
soon as it had subsided, I released his hand and smiled at him.

“I’d
better be careful. Those magic hands of yours pay the bills,” I laughed as I
wiped a tear from my eye.

He
smiled in return and leaned to kiss my forehead. “Oh I’m fine, Jess. No
offence, but you’re grip is kind of weak.”