Deep End: A Bad Boy Sports Romance (33 page)

“Well, if you had been talking to us for the last few years, instead of ignoring us, and treating us like we weren’t anything to you, you would have known he was undergoing chemotherapy for aggressive liver cancer.”

“Liver cancer?” I said, choosing for the moment to ignore the insult. After all, it hadn’t just been my fault we hadn’t talked. My Mother and Father hadn’t called me either, or tried to initiate contact in any way.

“He’d been drinking too much, apparently. Not that you would have known that, or even cared. Anyway, the funeral is today…”

That was the final straw for me.

“Today
?!
How could you not tell me ahead of time? Why didn’t you call me when he was dying, so I could have said goodbye? How long was he dying?”

“Oh, honey, he was sick for years…”

“Years!” I couldn’t believe it. “Why in the world didn’t you let me know?”

“We thought you wanted to be left alone, dear. After all, you were always such a sullen and selfish child…I just couldn’t imagine that you want to make the trip up here for your Father, even though it would have meant so much to him.”

“Of course I would have come up, if you had bothered to mention it to me. This is just like you, to blame the whole thing on me.”

I could barely listen to my Mother as she continued to insult me over the phone. I held the phone away from my ear. I couldn’t hear the words she was saying but I could hear the noise of her harsh voice…it made me shudder just hearing the tone.

I took a few deep breaths…just as my therapist had taught me. Not that I saw a therapist anymore, after he had tried to seduce me during a therapy session…I guess my perky breast sticking up as I lay on the couch had simply been too much of a temptation for him…

I was calm enough to ask my Mother for the directions and time of the funeral. I hung up before she could insult me further.

I arrived finally at my car in the strip club parking lot. I got in, drove home, and dressed myself up for a funeral. I had a funeral to go to…my own Father’s funeral.

Things were going much better for Colton.

Ever since he had gotten his new manager, he had enjoyed much more fame. He had done his first car commercial already, only a week after contracting Cambridge Whitehead as his manager.

Of course, a large percentage of the money he was earning was going right to Cambridge’s pocket. But honestly Colton didn’t even care.

He was trying to enjoy the new lifestyle…the new fame. When he went to the store now, people knew
who
he was. He had been on TV now, so he wasn’t just a
nobody
like everybody else.

And Cambridge had promised that he would be a household name within the next few months…all Colton had to do was keep competing at the same level at the rodeo…that shouldn’t be much of a problem. He was feeling as fit and healthy as ever…he was even drinking a little bit less. He figured he had a few good years left in him before he had to retire, and by that point he hoped that the fame he had build up in these good years would carry him into old age…

But he was having problems enjoying it…
.it
was very unusual for him. Sure, he was sleeping with hotter woman than ever before…many of them were actual models, whose pictures could be seen in the supermarket aisles on the covers of the national magazines. But it was that woman…that woman he had shared just one brief night with just one week ago…there was something special about her. He wasn’t sure what it was. He didn’t know how to describe it.

But as he thought more and more about her, his fear of deep intimate relationships began to slowly diminish. Of course, this transformation was only apparent to
himself
.

To everyone else, he was the same fun loving bad boy rodeo star as always…if not even more so, now that he was enjoying more fame.

But inside, he was secretly longing to find that woman again, and to have some type of relationship with her…he found himself wondering what she would look
like
as she grew older, as they grew older together. Would she be the woman who would bear him children? He found himself thinking about children for the first time in his adult life. Before her, the thought had never once crossed his mind.

But the fact of the matter was that Colton was far too caught up his new life to think much about Katy…after all, he didn’t even know her name.

This was the day of the next big event.

He was in the changing room at the rodeo.

The last competitor had just finished. There was only one more before Colton’s turn was up.

“Now, remember,” said Cambridge. “You don’t need to do anything spectacular. Don’t let this new fame get to your head. Don’t try any fancy tricks or anything. Just ride the bull like you always have. I mean really how hard is it? You just need to stay on for a couple second right?” Cambridge laughed at his own joke.

“It’s pretty difficult, no matter how many times you do it,” said Colton. His mind should have been focused on the bull…on the task he had ahead.

But for some strange reason, this changing room had reminded him of Katy. It was something about the scents here…it was the scents of the dirt, of the bulls…something about being a little closer to nature made him think of Katy and their night together.

“Earth to Colton. Colton, are you there?”

Colton looked up.

“What’s going on with you, Colton? You look like you’re out in space somewhere. You need to be concentrating. I’m doing all this work. Aren’t I promoting you well? You’re already getting more famous than you ever have been, right?”

Colton nodded his head.

“Great, now all you have to do is just keep doing what you’ve been doing for years. Just pretend you’re still the expert bull rider you were when you were toiling in obscurity. Pretend you don’t know anything about fame. Pretend it’s not even on your mind. This is what I tell all my clients who have to keep performing a skill…”

“Don’t all your clients have skills?” said Colton, seeming to wake up a little.

“You’d be surprised how easing acting is,” said Cambridge. “It’s really a lot more about the image with actors. And the rest of the skills we can usually fake. The singers, for instance, are usually just lip sinking at concerts. A lot of them had skills to begin with. But once they got famous, they couldn’t be bothered with trying to maintain a certain skill level. Plus, I think fame affects people negatively.”

“Shouldn’t you not be telling me this, especially now?” said Colton.

Cambridge laughed a big belly laugh. He adjusted his golden cuff links while nodding his head. “You’re a sharp one, Colton. Trust me, you’re going to be just fine. And after you win this one, I’m going to tell you what I have in store for you next. This next move of mine is going to propel you through the celebrity stratosphere, don’t worry. Just go out there and do your job.”

Colton nodded. He took his cowboy hat from the post and put it carefully on his head with one hand. He leaned down and adjusted his boots one final time. He was ready.

“Ladies and gentleman, may I now present to you the man you’ve all been waiting for, the current number one rodeo champion in the world…Colton.
”

The crowd exploded.

Something had happened.

There were people here who weren’t just rodeo fans.

In the last week alone, Colton’s fame had exploded.

Driving home from my Father’s funeral, I had heard Colton on a radio talk show. And there were fans calling in from all over, just hoping for a chance to talk to Colton for a moment.

I had to admit it had affected me. His widespread fame had made it nearly impossible to get him out of my head. He had become all I could think about.

I looked down and saw Colton. He was seated on his bull in the pen. He looked…well, he looked hot, especially in his cowboy hat and jeans…all that rodeo gear.

The bull was a big and vicious one. It was exhaling sharply through its massive nostrils…it seemed to me that I could sense its anger, it’s meanness.

The group was already going wild…there were women who were lifting up their shirts, showing their pert young breasts…
.I
felt a twang of jealousy…who knew how many more women Colton had slept with since me.

I was jealous, angry and sad. But I couldn’t stay away.

I had seen a billboard advertising this rodeo event, and had made a flash decision to come…the tickets had been more than I’d thought. The man at the ticket counter said that they were about to sell out, and that the tickets were selling for twice as much as normal. When I’d asked why, he’d said it was because Colton was fast becoming the most famous rodeo star ever.

The crowd was going insane at this point. Breasts were everywhere…young breasts…I looked down at my own and wondered if they could ever compete.

The voice on the loudspeaker was saying something, but I couldn’t concentrate on what it was saying, or who was speaking.

I had finally found Colton in the crowd. He was all I could see from that point onward.

He was wearing his full rodeo gear.

He wore his cowboy hat, his spurs, his chaps,
all
the leather gear that I had always associated with cowboy style. It turned out it was all practical gear, and the style was just an offshoot of original practical necessities…that just goes to show you how much of a city girl I really was. I didn’t know anything about cowboys or the rodeo. This was actually my first rodeo. There was a distant possibility I had been to one in college, but if that was true than I had definitely been so drunk on tequila that I didn’t remember a single moment of it.

Colton got onto the bull. The bull seemed fairly calm so far for having a human mount him, and for being locked in a pen.

Forgive me for my descriptions…I’m sure an actual rodeo fan would kill me for the technical details I’m missing, but I did my best to pay attention to the rodeo, but like I said I was not only a complete beginner, but also my mind and my body were so focused on Colton that it was hard to see what was going on around him…not that focusing on the rodeo rider during a rodeo is a bad thing…but, you know, you should also be paying attention to the bull and all that…

Colton looked…hot.
Simply hot.

Colton had a way of sitting on that bull that made it look easy. He had a way of moving his body fluidly along with the bull. It was strange, observing him, to see how gracefully his body moved, meanwhile being encased in very stiff clothing made out of leather and denim. His blue jeans, for instance, must have been some kind of special cowboy brand, since they were perhaps twice as thick and twice as stiff as the normal jeans. But because of the way his chaps were positioned, I could still get a great view of his ass, which looked even tighter, even plumper, even more muscular than when I had seen him outside of the rodeo arena…I would have to ask him about those blue jeans…

Of course, asking him about the blue jeans meant that I would see him again, and I wasn’t imagining just any old interaction, but an intimate one…

Even though he had left me at the hotel…abandoned me like any other fan, I knew that I had to have him again…and I had no doubt that he wanted me too…I didn’t know how I knew, but something had completely overcome me…Colton was now, now that I saw him, at least, a complete obsession.

My vision became like a tunnel, and the periphery completely faded out. I was no longer aware at all of the crowd or where I saw on the bleachers.

Something must have happened…some announcement…the next thing I knew an assistant, also dressed in cowboy gear, ran up and jabbed the bull with a long stick. It was possible that it was an electrical prod, but I couldn’t be sure. I thought I had remembered something

Colton rode it like the pro that he was.

He looked incredibly hot. He looked like he was having the time of his life.

When the bull finally bucked him off, the smile was still glued to Colton’s face.

Colton went flying through the air. But even as he did so, he looked absolutely graceful. He reminded me of a ballerina. He was spectacular, twisting his body around in such a way that he just barely missed the horns of the bull…the horns were swishing viciously through the air, their pointed ends trying desperately to piece Colton, the bull’s tormentor.

Colton landed on his feet. It was miraculous…I wasn’t sure, but I was pretty sure that the bull riders didn’t normally land like that…totally intact and standing tall in their cowboy boots.

Colton beamed at the crowed.

The bull was looking angrier than ever, even now that it had finally gotten Colton off its back.

Colton took his hat off and waved at the crowd.

I was so focused on him, that somehow that focus must have communicated itself to Colton. I imagined I must have looked quite singular, that I must have stood out quite a bit, sitting in the crowd, focused only on Colton…or else it was something else altogether. Maybe it had to do with that feeling that he and I were meant to be together, no matter what…

Whatever the cause, we locked eyes…

Colton stared into my eyes, and it felt like he was seeing deep down into my soul. My body felt completely bare before his gaze. At the same time, I felt like I could see into him in a way that I couldn’t before…
.I
saw all the troubles he was going through…it was almost something like a telepathic connection, without all the magical mumbo jumbo…this was just the power of two souls connecting, the power of love…

I knew in that instant that Colton really was the man for me. And I could see it in him…he knew then and there that I was who he wanted, more than anyone else. For both of us, there wasn’t anyone else that could do that job. And we knew this without even talking about it, without discussing it, without even uttering a single word.