Deadly Force (36 page)

Backing up, her foot caught on the metal chair leg, sending it banging into the wall. Cal opened his eyes and frowned when he saw the tears rolling down her face.

“B?”

She couldn’t stay here. Couldn’t look at him and not feel horrible guilt at the way her sad, pathetic life had chained his hands. How her mother had tied him to her, knowing that even as a kid, he was responsible and honorable and would do the right thing when she couldn’t.

Coward
.

Annabelle had played them both, right up to the end. The ultimate manipulator.

A sob broke from her lips. Her life was a lie. She’d been damaged goods then and she still was. Everything she touched, she ruined.

“I love you, too,” she whispered. “But it’s time you had a life without me. A real life, where you don’t have to worry about me. You fulfilled your promise, Cal. Now go find a woman you can love with no strings attached.”

“What?”

With her heart shattering into a million pieces once more, she bolted for the door. There she stopped and looked back at Cal. He looked too big for the bed, his gypsy eyes confused. “But I’m taking the dog. Go adopt a cat instead.”

Chapter Thirty-four

San Diego

Six weeks later

The doorbell rang, Maggie barked, and Bianca looked up from her book. The sun was setting and the living room had grown dark without her noticing. She’d been so absorbed in JD Robb’s
Reunion
In Death
, she hadn’t noticed her eyes were straining.

She rubbed her eyes. Her new contacts took some getting used to. She never read fiction, especially suspense or mysteries, since she could figure out the bad guy from the start. Most were filled with plot holes so big she wanted to throw them across the room.

In fact,
The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind
sat open on her coffee table where she’d left it. Next to that, was
What To Expect When You’re Expecting
.

She was late with her period. Sick to her stomach as well. After two pregnancies, she knew the signs, but she couldn’t bring herself to take the test sitting in her cabinet.

What were the odds? Even if she were pregnant—the universe sure had a sick sense of humor—her track record of carrying a pregnancy to term sucked. Although, after the last miscarriage, her gynecologist had discovered an abnormality with her cervix and corrected it with same-day surgery. Her odds were better now of carrying a child to term.

And her heart, oddly enough, wanted one.

Listening to her heart came easier these days. She’d found a way to shut off the logical side of her brain—she’d had to in order to stop thinking about Cal and what she should have, could have done to save their marriage—and Ronni had loaded her up with paperbacks that now consumed her when she wasn’t working. After finishing the last
In Death
book, she’d tried diving into
Bicameral Mind
, but her brain had craved more fiction.
Reunion In Death
was number fourteen in the series and there were many more to go. A lot of chapters in the baby book to read too.

The doorbell rang again. No one but Ronni ever came to visit and she always texted first. Hope jumped in Bianca’s chest.
Illogical
. No one knew where she lived except for Ronni and the taskforce. She’d changed her name, created a new identity for herself with the help of Bobby and the blessing of Victor Dupé. The secrets in her head made her a target for some very bad people and she wasn’t about to leave herself an easy target.

Even so, it wouldn’t be impossible for a good hacker to find her location. She’d anticipated as much. Slipping her hand under the sofa pillow, she drew out her handgun and flipped off the safety.

Making a mental note of her place in the book, she tossed it on top of the baby book and headed for the door. Maggie followed.

A check of the peephole revealed a familiar face on the other side. Not the one she’d hoped for, but odds were, she’d never see that face again.

And that was fine. That was what she wanted.

At least the logical side of her thought so.

Logic insisted the truth had set them both free. Bianca had no doubt Cal had felt a huge relief after he got used to her not being around and needing him. He’d probably run with his freedom to the nearest “normal” woman he could find. He was living a happy life with a healthy relationship.

And good for him
. He deserved that.

On the other hand, the emotional side of her—which refused to go back into its hole—wanted Cal to realize he actually
did
love her, heart and soul, with no promises or personal codes of honor hanging over his head. She wanted him to break down the walls of heaven and the gates of hell to find her.

So far, logic was winning, just like always.

She unlocked the door and cracked it open, gun out of sight but still hanging by her side. Maggie rushed out between her legs and greeted the visitor, jumping and licking him, and making him laugh.

When the dog settled down to simply wagging and panting, their visitor looked up with a smile on his face and met Bianca’s eyes. “Hey, Bianca. How’s it going?”

“It’s Bronwyn, now.” Of course, he knew that if he’d found her residence. “Wyn for short. How’d you find me?”

Emit Petit wore his usual—black everything—and feigned shock at her question. “You doubt my skills?”

She doubted his intentions. This was no casual visit. He was Cal’s friend, not hers. “What do you want?”

“Right to business. Some things never change.” He patted Maggie’s head. “Aren’t you going to invite me in?”

“Nope.”

He waited as if she might be kidding.

She wasn’t.

He lifted one brow and smiled, hoping she would feel pressured and change her mind.

She didn’t.

“Okay, okay.” He stuck a hand in his coat and rustled around. “Two things actually. First”—he pulled out a pale blue envelope from the inside pocket—“we’re having a birthday party for Austin next weekend. He’s turning one. Lori and I would like you to come.”

A social event. People, kids, food, and fun. Something she’d always hated. Something she might
still
hate, but she was working on that. Ronni and Thomas were helping her learn real world social skills. She’d already survived a party at Cooper and Celina’s. It had only included the taskforce members but it had been nice. Not as overwhelming as she’d feared.

There were a dozen reasons why she shouldn’t go to the birthday party, but only one that mattered. “Will Cal be there with his new girlfriend?”

Emit’s brows drew together and he looked confused. “Nooo.” His voice held a trace of a lie.

She took the invitation. “I’ll think about it. What’s the second thing?”

He reached into his coat pocket again. “This.”

The envelope this time was legal sized and pale ivory. Her lawyer’s name and address were in the top left corner.

The divorce papers
.

Her heart cramped inside her chest. As usual, her instincts and her logic had been spot on. This was no casual visit. “Oh. I see. He finally signed them.”
But he couldn’t bother to bring them himself
.

Fingers shaking, she snatched the envelope from Emit’s hand. “He could have just mailed them to the lawyer.”

Emit scratched the back of his head, looked around. “Are you doing okay, Bianca? I mean, Bronwyn? Harris said you’re consulting for the taskforce, but he said you won’t come back to his team fulltime.”

The envelope in her hand felt too heavy. She tossed it onto the foyer table and the stupid thing slid off. “I’m not an undercover agent, and there’s a lot of stuff up here.” She tapped her temple with a finger and focused on Maggie for a second to calm herself. The dog did wonders for her anxiety. “Criminals, terrorists, and foreign governments would like to get their hands on that kind of information. It’s not safe for me to stay in one place too long or to form permanent relationships.”

“Sounds lonely.”

Ironically, she felt less alone now than she had before. It would suck when she had to pack up and move, but Victor Dupé had already found several government consulting jobs along the west coast for her where she’d make new friends and have a decent income. “I know how to take care of myself. I’m fine.”

And she was, except for the raging gap of misery in her heart.

“Well…” Emit hesitated. “I have a proposition for you.”

“I’m not interested.”

He held up a hand. “Hear me out. Business is good, but I need help. Help that I can trust. You’d be challenged and never bored, and you’d be safe. My team is made up of all crack bodyguards and they’re smart. Not as smart as you, but I need the ultimate analytical mind to teach them how to fine-tune their skills so they can be better. I don’t want them to just be meat bags that stop a bullet. I want them to stop the bullets
before
they fly.”

Neurons in her brain fired. Her pulse sped up. What he was offering sounded too good to be true.

Which meant it was.

Maggie stood and looked down the sidewalk toward Emit’s SUV parked at the curb. There was no one in the front seat, no one nearby.

“Offering me a job out of pity or because you owe Cal is low, even for you, Emit.”

“No one in their right mind would ever pity you, Bianca, and I would never offer anyone a job if I didn’t know they were the right person.”

“Bronwyn, not Bianca.” She didn’t believe him. His eyes were sincere and his posture earnest, but there was a slight dip in his voice. “You’re lying again.”

He pinched his lips together, sighed. “Not about the job. I’m prepared to offer you a very substantial salary and all the perks that go along with management. You’d have your run of all my gadgets and I’d tell you all my secrets.”

“I don’t want to know any more secrets. Trust me.”

He put his hands on his hips and gave her an exasperated look. “Tell you what, why don’t you speak to my project manager. He can explain things better than I can.”

He turned and motioned toward his vehicle. Maggie wagged her tail.

As the rear passenger side door opened, Bianca’s heart stopped.

Cal exited the SUV slowly, shutting the door and standing on the sidewalk. He didn’t move, just stared at her.

Maggie
woofed
once, then looked back at Bianca. She was too stunned to do anything but give the dog the command to go. Maggie rushed down the sidewalk and nearly jumped into Cal’s arms.

Dog and master greeted each other, Maggie’s enthusiasm pulling a smile from Cal’s otherwise grim face.

Bianca tried to harden her heart. “What is he doing here?”

“What the hell do you think he’s doing here?” Emit said. “He was afraid you wouldn’t open the door if he showed up, so he sent me ahead to scope out enemy territory.”

“Why. Is. He. Here?”

“Because he loves you, B. He’s not going to sign those divorce papers so you may as well burn them.”

The reunion with Maggie over, Cal started up the sidewalk, the dog slowing his progress by trying to get him to play.

It couldn’t be true. He’d had Emit track her down. He hadn’t signed the divorce papers. She’d given him his freedom and her blessing and he’d come back anyway.

Hastily setting the gun on the table, Bianca stepped out onto the porch. “Is it true?”

He was smiling. “Is what true?”

Emit backed away as Cal took the steps, sweeping her up in a bear hug.

She let out a squeak. Surprise, mixed with that fragile but tenacious spark of hope, made her giddy. But that hope was still tempered. “Do you love me for me and not out of a convoluted sense of honor and duty?”

He stared into her eyes, his own dark ones snapping with what looked like the same hope she was feeling. “I’ve always loved you for you. This past month, I worked on my rehab, and it was hell. I went before the investigative board and Congress and cleared my name. But the only reason I left you alone was to prove to both of us that we belong together. I can’t imagine my life without you. We’re a team, remember?”

She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “Aren’t you going back to the Navy?”

“You heard Emit. I’m his new project manager. And we need an analyst, badly. Emit can’t keep up with the number of clients we have and something’s going to slide through the cracks. A client or one of our men are going to get hurt or killed. I have the field knowledge, but you…you have the brains. The ability to analyze and predict outcomes. Together, you and I can make sure Emit’s team stays safe and so do the clients.”

“And,” Emit added, “you won’t need a fake name. You keep my men safe and they’ll return the favor.”

It was a big step. A huge one. The dynamics were mindboggling. Exactly the kind of thing she loved.

Emit peeked over Cal’s shoulder at her. “What do you say?”

What could she say? She got her husband back and a new career.

She gave Cal a death glare. “How often will you be leaving me?”

“Did I not just say we’re a team?” He grinned. “Where you go, I go, and vice versa. We’ll travel to locations together to scope out security holes, and we’ll brainstorm, plan, and execute operations together as well.”