Daunting Days of Winter (17 page)

“We’ll come for you in the morning, Jennifer,” Gabe said as they prepared to close the hatch. “Kyle, you have to stay here until the jury is ready. Have a good night.” The hatch swung shut, and the chest was slid back into position. Kyle pressed the button on his flashlight, and a single, thin beam of white light pierced the darkness.

“A flashlight?” Jennifer asked. “Where did you get that?”

Kyle took Jennifer by the hand and led her over to his sleeping pad, carefully guiding her head to avoid the metal pipes that hung from the joists. “Ty gave it to me. It’s LED, so it doesn’t use much power. There’s not much to see down here, so I only use it to find my bucket, or on special occasions like this.”

Her eyes shimmered in the light, and Kyle could see she was on the verge of tears. “What’s wrong?” He switched off the light and sat beside her in the darkness.

She let out a sob-laced laugh. “What’s wrong? You’re fighting for your life, and we’re imprisoned in the cellar of a decrepit old house, and you ask what’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, pulling her close and rocking her. “I’m sorry I’m putting you through this. I’m sorry that after everything else, that you have to deal with this.”

“Oh, Kyle. You haven’t done anything wrong. It’s this whole screwed up world we’re living in. I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m terrified that I’m going to lose you. I think my testimony today sealed it. How am I supposed to live with that?” She wiped her eyes and nose with her sleeve.

“Don’t say that, Jenn. I was so happy to be your husband today, just as I am everyday. I’d walk from Texas again just to spend one day with you, let alone ten weeks.”

“I should’ve lied. Should’ve said we made love every day, till I couldn’t walk anymore. Told them you begged me to stop. Instead, I made you look more guilty.”

He could hear her sniffing, and he kissed her on the head. “I love you. Do you understand that? No matter what happens, good or bad, I completely, absolutely, one hundred percent, no hesitation whatsoever, love you.”

There was a long pause before she spoke. “I know, Kyle, but I don’t deserve you. You nearly die walking home, and instead of a loving wife you find some frigid, emotionally unstable waif posing in her place, someone who jumps at her own shadow or at a touch she isn’t expecting. How can you still love me?”

“Oh, babe,” Kyle said, fighting to control his own emotions. “Please don’t say that. What do I have to do to make you believe that I’m completely, crazy in love with you? When we got married, I thought a man could never love anyone more than I did then, but I was so wrong. When I was walking home, every night I prayed for at least one more day with you, one more touch of your hand, one more kiss. Then when I made it, when I finally saw you, it was the most powerful thing I’ve ever felt. I didn’t know it was possible to love someone that much. I remembered everything we’ve been through together, the easy times, and the hard. I knew for sure then, and still know today, how little I want a life that you aren’t a part of. I love you so much more now than the day we got married because of what we’ve been through, because every minute we spend together makes you more a part of me. Please, don’t ever ask me how I can love you.”

His arms were wrapped around her, and he pulled her even closer, resting his head on hers, then kissing her cheek. She didn’t speak, but he could feel her crying.

They sat together, feeling each other’s warmth, rocking gently. After a long period of silence, Jennifer finally spoke. “I’m scared.”

Kyle nodded. “Me too. Me too.”

“What do I do if I lose you?”

“You’ll never lose me, but if the worst happens, you’ll be fine, Jenn. You’ll make it. You’re tough.”

“I’m not that tough. If they find you guilty, you know they’re going to shoot you, right?”

Kyle nodded, the lump in his throat growing larger. “Yeah. I try not to think about it, but it’s crossed my mind a time or two.”

“How do I live with that? How do I look at our kids everyday for the rest of my life, knowing that their father was murdered and I couldn’t do anything about it.”

“Try and think positive.”

“How? How do I think positive? There’s not a positive thing about this. That woman was too good. Your guy, Boyd, was serviceable, but she was a pit bull. She could have gotten Spencer convicted. There was no way to stop her.”

“Whatever happens, you’ll be fine. You have to be fine. Promise me that. You made it for months without me; you can do it again. This is still a good community. They’ll help you. They can hate me, but they like you.”

“Stop it, Kyle. I’m not that strong. When you weren’t here, I didn’t know where you were, so I could believe you’d be back, that I just had to hold on another day. That gave me strength, taking it a day at a time. If this happens, then all hope is lost. I’ll have nothing to hold on to. They may as well shoot me, because losing you will kill me. I don’t know how women do it who lose their husbands.”

Kyle fought to compose himself. “You can’t think that way. We have three children who need you. You’ll find the strength; I know it. Besides, I’ll be there. You might not be able to see me, but I’ll be there. I know I’m not that religious, but if it’s possible, if God will let me, I’ll give up heaven so I can be at your side every minute of every day, until it’s your time. I’ll catch every tear that you shed. I’ll be in every breeze that you feel. I’ll hold your head every night when you fall asleep. I’ll never, ever be gone from you. You just have to be strong until we’re together again. Do you promise to do that?”

Jennifer couldn’t speak. Sobs racked her body and sapped her strength. Kyle held her, rocked her, stroked her hair, kissed her forehead, and experienced her in his arms, praying the moment would never end. “Do you promise me?” he asked again when his own tears slowed.

He felt her head nod. “I promise,” she managed when she could finally speak. “As long as you promise to always be there, I promise.”

“I will always be there.”

He felt her twist in his arms, and she pushed him down on his back. She leaned down and kissed him on the lips, a deep, warm, all-consuming kiss. “I love you, Kyle Tait,” she said as she pulled away and sat up. He heard the zipper on her jacket, then felt her hands searching for his.

CHAPTER 21

Thursday, January 26
^th

Deer Creek, MT

The jurors were back in their seats at the front of the room, silent, eyes down, arms folded tightly across their chests. The verdict had just been handed to Don Anderson, and the tension was thick. There were a few whispers and some sideways glances, but without exception everyone’s attention was locked on the two men at the front.

Shortly after the first signs of daylight had peeked through the cracks in the foundation, the hatch had been opened and Jennifer told to leave, then Kyle had waited for seven long hours before being informed that the verdict was in, and he was to be taken to the courthouse.

When Kyle and his entourage arrived at the building, it was packed, with every seat full and more than a hundred people standing in the back of the hall. Jennifer waited in the first row behind the defense table, wearing her best dress. Their three children were next to her, all dressed in church clothes at least one size too small. Spencer grinned at the sight of his dad and ran forward to hug him. Kyle knelt down and winked, his arms still secured behind his back. “You sure look good. How are you doing?”

Spencer wrapped his arms around Kyle’s neck. “I want you to come home, dad. I miss you.”

“I want to come home, too, son. Maybe today. Would that be alright?”

Spencer nodded, his arms still tight around his dad. “Why are your hands tied up? What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything, Spence. People are just worried.”

Jennifer peeled Spencer off of Kyle, and both father and son began to cry. Kyle stood up and proceeded to the front of the room. He smiled at David and Emma, who both sat there with swollen, red eyes. Jennifer slipped into her chair with Spencer and smiled bravely at Kyle.

Boyd pulled Kyle’s chair away from the table and waited for him to sit. “How are you doing today?”

“Had better days, I have to admit. Hopefully things will improve.”

“Lets hope so,” Boyd replied, patting Kyle on the back.

Kyle watched as Don placed the envelope with the verdict on the table in front of them. Gabe looked up and addressed the jurors. “Is everyone in agreement on the verdict?”

There were nods and mumbled affirmations.

Don opened the envelope, took out the folded piece of paper, and he and Gabe read the verdict in silence. He then returned to the jury, where the foreman stood to receive the paper.

“Please read your verdict,” Gabe said, his voice cracking.

The man nodded, unfolded the paper, and read. “We, the members of this jury, on the charge of murder, find the defendant guilty.”

A roar of voices filled the room. Kyle heard Jennifer gasp, then Emma’s panicked voice. “What does that mean, mom?”

Boyd put his hand on Kyle’s shoulder and almost shouted to be heard. “I’m really sorry, Kyle. I thought we made our case.”

Kyle stared at the ground, shaking his head vigorously from side to side.

The foreman waited for the room to calm down. Gabe banged on the front table with a hammer until it was almost silent and the foreman could continue. “On the charge of rape, we find the defendant guilty.” Another roar went through the crowd, though not as long or as loud. The juror handed the paper back to Don and sat down.

All eyes were now locked on the two men at the front of the room. Don and Gabe whispered back and forth briefly, Gabe shaking his head as he spoke. Finally Don stood, and the room went silent. “Mr. Tait,” he began, his voice shaking. “This jury has found you guilty of rape and murder. This was a vicious and terrible crime, and because of the horrific nature of it, you are sentenced to death.” A smattering of applause could be heard as the room again descended into chaos. Several minutes and several pounds of the hammer later, the room got quiet again and Don continued. “The sentence will be carried out before sunset. We ask that young children not be exposed to this event.” He took a deep breath and put his hand on the table to steady himself.

Kyle heard his family crying, despite the surrounding commotion, and Carol Jeffries trying to console Spencer and Emma. Kyle’s head was spinning; he leaned against the table to steady himself. His guards stepped closer, nervously scanning the crowd. Gabe once again used the hammer to return order to the court. “Mr. Tait, do you have anything to say?”

Kyle took a deep breath as he sat up and nodded. Don motioned for Kyle to speak. He stood and turned to the crowd, which quickly went silent. Every eye in the room was glued to him as tears ran freely down his cheeks. “I just want to say,” he looked at the Smith family, “that I’m sorry.” An explosion of voices forced Gabe, once again, to use his hammer to settle the crowd. “Not,” Kyle shouted, the noise decreasing. “Not because I hurt your daughter. I didn’t. But I am sorry for your loss. I have children who I love very much, and I can only guess at the hurt and the loss that you’re feeling. I hope those wounds will heal.”

He looked at his wife and smiled. “I want you all to know how much I love my wife. And whatever you think about me, or this verdict, please don’t hold this against her. She’s an amazing woman who made me a better man than I ever would have been without her, but she’ll need your help.” He swallowed, the lump in his throat making it hard to speak. “I don’t know who did this, but my death will not make you any safer. I do hope that at some point the guilty person will be found and that you will all be able sleep safer at night.” He thanked Don and Gabe and sat down, nearly collapsing into his chair.

Don dismissed the crowd, and chairs clattered on the floor as people hurried to the exit. Kyle felt arms around his neck and Jennifer’s lips on his cheek. “I can’t believe this, Kyle,” she choked out. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

Kyle focused on his children. David was wiping his eyes on his sleeve, Spencer had his face buried in Carol’s lap, and Emma, looking terrified, clung tightly to her mother’s arm. Kyle broke down and sobbed uncontrollably, his emotions too much to control, his shoulders heaving as the magnitude of his sentence hit him. “I love you all so much,” he wailed, his arms still secured behind his back, making it impossible to hug his children.

His guards stood a few steps back, watching the scene unfold, waiting to take him away, while the family huddled and wept together, broken hearted, and in unbearable pain. The room had mostly emptied, leaving just Kyle and his family, Carol, the four guards, and some curious onlookers. With no more words to say, Kyle and his family just sat, holding each other, being together for their final few minutes.

One of the guards finally spoke up. “I’m really, really sorry, Mr. Tait, but we need to go. We have to take you now.”

Kyle looked up at the guard. “I understand,” he said. He tried to stand, but his legs gave out, and he fell to the floor. Two of the guards grabbed his shoulders and helped him to his feet, supporting him on each side.

“We can escape, Dad!” David whispered urgently. “I’ll get my gun; we can get away.”

“No, David,” Kyle said shaking his head. “Don’t do that. No one else needs to get hurt. It’s better to die innocent than kill to be free. Please, son.” He waited until David looked him in the eyes. “You’ve got to be there for your mother. You understand? She needs you more than ever.”

Tears streamed down David’s defiant face, but he nodded his understanding. The guards began walking him towards the door, and Spencer started screaming hysterically. Carol held him in her arms to keep him from running after his father. Emma lay in a heap on the floor, her head cradled in Jennifer’s lap, her eyes swollen and red. “David,” Jennifer said, her voice faltering. “Hold your sister. I have to go with your father.”

“No, Jennifer!” Kyle called out. “I don’t want you to see this. I don’t want you to have that memory.”