Authors: Mary Downing Hahn
She snapped it, almost getting my fingers as well as the cheese, and gulped it down. "Me-row?" she asked politely.
Having nothing else to do, I fed her the rest of the slice of cheese bit by bit, hoping she wouldn't throw it up later. Then I went upstairs to my room and lay down on my bed. Although I'd planned to read or maybe even start another Benjamin Mouse story, I fell asleep instead.
I didn't wake up until late in the afternoon. I knew that Josh was home because I could hear his stereo, but I felt too bad to get up and tell him to turn it down. My head hurt, my throat was sore, and my whole body ached.
By the time Mom came home, I was sure I had a fever. When she called me from downstairs, I answered feebly and begged her to bring me a glass of orange juice.
"What's the matter, honey?" Mom paused in the doorway and smiled at me. She had her hands behind her back as if she had a surprise for me.
"Didn't you bring the orange juice?" I whimpered.
"I brought something else." She crossed the room and stood next to me. "Do you feel well enough for a surprise?"
I nodded. "What is it?"
With a little flourish, she handed me something warm and soft, a little bundle of black fur. "For youâfrom Hope."
"It's Raven!" I cradled the kitten gently. His whole body vibrated with a purr so loud it was hard to believe it came from something so small. Cuddling him close to me, I smiled up at Mom. "Did you keep him at the library all day?"
She sat down next to me and nodded. "He was so good. He stayed in my office and behaved himself beautifully." Laying her hand on my forehead, she looked concerned. "You're burning up, Jessie."
"I feel awful. I didn't even go to school. I stayed home and slept all day."
"Is your throat sore?"
I nodded. "And I ache all over."
"A lot of people at the library have been out sick with some kind of virus. I guess that's what you have." She got up. "I'll get you the juice and an aspirin. Then I'll tell you what happened this morning."
While she was gone, I petted Raven. I wasn't sure I wanted to know what had happened at Daphne's house. Didn't I feel bad enough already? I just wanted to lie in bed and stroke Raven and wait for my body to stop aching. I didn't want to hear depressing things. I didn't want to worry.
When Mom came back, she gave me an aspirin, and I swallowed it down with juice. Then she sat down on my bed and told me what had happened.
"It was a good thing that I went, Jessica. Poor Mrs. Woodleigh was so confused she could barely remember who Hope and Daphne were. Like you said, she ranted and raved about the cracks in the ceiling and assured me that her son would be home any minute to take care of everything. She was very hostile toward Ed and me. At one point she tried to run us off with a broom." Mom shook her head and sighed.
"But it wasn't just her mental condition that worried Ed and me. She's obviously in poor physical health. I suspect she's suffering from malnutrition, and she may have pneumonia from the sound of her cough." Mom looked at me. "You should have told me sooner, Jessica, you really should have."
I lay back on my pillow, still holding Raven, and shook my head. "You know I promised Daphne not to tell."
"Some things are far too serious to keep to yourself. When I think of those poor frightened girls alone in that cold house with that sick old woman, no food, no electricity, no one to turn to for help..." Mom's voice trailed off.
"What happened, what did you do?" I asked.
"I left Ed there and drove to McDonald's to call the county Social Services Department. They got Mrs. Woodleigh into a hospital, and a social worker took Daphne and Hope to Roseland."
"What's that?" The pretty name sounded like a cover-up for a terrible place with bars on the windows.
"It's a shelter for children who have no suitable home. I know it must sound awful to you, but at least they'll have warm beds and three decent meals a day." Mom patted my shoulder and tried to smile, but her voice was sad.
"Did Daphne say anything about me?"
There was a brief silence. "No, she didn't, Jessica," Mom said slowly. "She was very upset, especially about her grandmother." She paused again. "Hope found the kitten and brought him to me for you. She said she'd take good care of Baby Mouse."
"Oh, Mom." I started crying. "Daphne hates me, doesn't she? She'll never forgive me for telling you, I know she won't!"
"Now, now, Jessie, don't cry. Give Daphne a little time. She'll understand that it was the best thing for her and Hope ... and for their grandmother."
"If only you could have brought them here, then maybe she'd forgive me, but you sent her to Roseland. I bet there isn't one rose there or anything nice." I was so upset that I let Raven go and rolled over on my stomach. Burying my face in my pillow, I sobbed while Mom rubbed my back and tried to comfort me.
When I could talk calmly, I asked, "Do you really think they'll be all right at Roseland?"
"I'm sure they will be. Please try not to worry about them, honey. You'll just make yourself feel worse."
"Where is Roseland?"
"Up in the mountains. Somewhere west of Hagerstown, I think."
"Is that far?"
"About fifty or sixty miles, I guess." Mom stroked my forehead. "When you feel better, do you want to go and see them?"
I nodded. "If Daphne wants me to."
Mom shifted her weight, as if she were about to get up. "Don't go." I grabbed her hand. "Stay a while, just till I fall asleep."
She smiled. "Is there anything I can get you?"
"No, just you. You're all I want," I mumbled.
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For three days I felt too sick to think about anything, even Daphne. My body felt as if someone had beaten it all over with a baseball bat, and my throat was so sore I could hardly talk. All I did was sleep, drink orange juice, and take aspirin. On Sunday I felt well enough to sit up and watch television, and on Monday I ate dinner downstairs with everyone. Mom decided that I would probably be able to go back to school by Thursday.
"Maybe you should call Tracy and see what's going on in your classes. She could tell you what you've missed and help you get caught up," Mom suggested.
Reluctantly I dialed Tracy's number. I hadn't heard from her since she'd walked home with me from the village center. I was afraid that Michelle and Sherry might have convinced her that I was as strange as Daphne.
The phone rang once, twice, but just as I was about to hang up, Tracy's little sister said, "Hello?"
"Hi, Kelly, is Tracy there?"
"Just a minute." With an ear-splitting clank, she dropped the phone. "Tracy!" Kelly bellowed. "It's for you!"
"Who is it?" I heard Tracy yell.
"I don't know, some girl. Not Michelle."
"Tell her I'll be there in a minute."
"She's in the bathroom," Kelly yelled into the phone, then dropped it again, almost deafening me for life.
After a while, Tracy said, "Hello?"
"Hi, it's me."
"Jess, how are you? When are you coming back to school?"
"Thursday, I think. Have I missed much?"
"Just the same old boring stuff." While Tracy filled me in on the details of book reports, math tests, and history projects, I tried to analyze her tone of voice. She didn't sound bored or angry or disgusted, so I hoped that things were still all right between us.
"You won't have any trouble catching up, Jess. You're such a brain and all." Tracy popped her gum and added, "Did you know Daphne is in Roseland?"
"How did you find out?"
"Mr. O'Brien told us. He thought some of us might want to write to her or something."
"Do you think anybody will?"
"No. I'd kind of like to, but I don't know what to say. I was thinking maybe I'd send her a funny card or something."
"She'd like that."
"I guess you've written to her."
Embarrassed, I doodled little spirals on the pad by the phone. "I haven't yet. I guess I felt too bad." I hesitated, then asked, "Are Michelle and Sherry mad at me?"
"No, I don't think so. In fact, Michelle said to tell you she was sorry she upset you. She didn't mean to make you cry." Tracy popped her gum again and added, "Don't let her bother you, Jess. Michelle doesn't mean half the dumb stuff she says."
"I'll try to remember that." I grabbed a Kleenex and blew my nose. "Well, thanks for telling me what's going on at school, Tracy. I think I'm going back to bed. I still feel kind of crummy."
"I'll see you Thursday, okay?"
"Okay." After I hung up, I felt a little better about everything. At least Tracy was still friendly, and, if she were telling the truth, Michelle and Sherry weren't going to say or do anything too horrible to me.
Rescuing Raven from the corner Snuff had backed him into, I carried him up to my room and crawled into bed. I turned out the light and lay in the dark listening to Raven's wonderful rumbling purr. In the corner of my room, the moonlight dimly illuminated my dollhouse. I thought of Princess Heatherfern standing at her window and Cragstar poring over his books in the tower. They were still waiting for Sir Benjamin to come home, but I knew he wasn't going to return. Like Daphne's father, he was gone for good.
"You might as well be brave and face the truth," I whispered to the mice. "Daphne was right about happy endings. They just don't happen in real life."
W
HEN I WENT
back to school, nobody said anything about Daphne except Mr. O'Brien. He caught me in the hall after school and started asking me questions.
"I'm so worried about Daphne," he began. "Have you talked to her since she went to Roseland?"
Avoiding his eyes, I shook my head. "It's a long-distance call." Even to me that sounded like a feeble excuse.
He frowned. "I didn't think of that. Well, have you written to her?"
Again I shook my head. "I've been really sick," I mumbled.
He sighed. "I'm sure she'd enjoy hearing from you, Jessica. You were the only real friend Daphne had here." He sounded puzzled.
"It's all my fault she's in Roseland, don't you know that?" Angrily I felt tears fill my eyes. I didn't want to cry in front of Mr. O'Brien, especially not here in the hall where anyone might walk by and see me. "Daphne doesn't want to hear from me. She hates me for telling my mother, I know she does!"
Mr. O'Brien shook his head. "I don't think Daphne could possibly hate you. Please write to her, let her know she has a friend."
After promising Mr. O'Brien that I would write to her, I edged away from him toward my locker. All the way home I composed letters in my head, but when I sat down at my desk, a blank sheet of stationery in front of me, all I could write was "Dear Daphne." Nothing more.
Days went by. Every night I promised myself I'd write the letter in the morning, but I never did. The more I delayed, the guiltier I felt. To make myself feel better, I told myself that Daphne despised me, that I was the last person she wanted to hear from, that she would probably tear a letter from me to pieces without even reading it.
Then, about three weeks later, Mr. O'Brien told our English class that he had an announcement to make.
"I'm proud to tell you that Daphne's and Jessica's book won first prize in the county Write-a-Book contest."
Everybody clapped and smiled at me. When the room was quiet, Mr. O'Brien added that "The Mysterious Disappearance of Sir Benjamin Mouse" was now on display in the exhibit hall at the Board of Education building.
"In June, the winners are invited to attend a special awards banquet. I'll have more information on that later, Jessica."
After class, Mr. O'Brien stopped me. "Would it be possible for your mother to drive you out to Roseland so you could give Daphne the good news in person?"
"I guess so," I said.
He tipped my chin up, forcing me to look at him. "I'm sure she doesn't hate you, Jessica."
"But I let her down. I broke my promise."
"Go see her, take her the good news about the book." He smiled. "I'd go myself, but I'm sure she'd rather see you."
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That Sunday Mom drove me out to Roseland. It was a long ride through the rolling farmland of western Maryland. Mom had no problem as long as we stayed on Interstate 70, but as soon as she found herself trying to navigate the winding country roads that led to Roseland, she got lost. We had to stop at three gas stations and a funny little store to ask directions.
Finally we drove over the crest of a hill and saw an official-looking green sign pointing the way to Roseland. Following the arrow, Mom turned into a narrow driveway, winding uphill through trees tipped now with green.
"What happens if someone comes in the other direction?" I looked ahead at the narrow road. It wasn't wide enough for two cars, and I couldn't see a shoulder, just trees crowding right up to the rutted asphalt.
Mom grinned. "Just hope no one leaves before we get there."
At last we left the woods behind. Ahead of us, at the end of a circular drive, was Roseland. It was a huge stone house sitting on the top of a hill. Behind it the mountains loomed, almost as blue as the sky.
"What a beautiful place," Mom sighed. "It must have been someone's home once a long time ago."
I stared at the building, but all I saw was its grimness. Bristling with fire escapes, it looked like a prison to me. I was sure Hope and Daphne didn't think it was beautiful.
"Do you want me to come in with you?" Mom nosed the cat smoothly into a packing place marked
VISITORS ONLY.
I shook my head. "I think I'd rather see her alone, if you don't mind."
Mom smiled. "I'll just walk around the grounds, then. It's a beautiful day, and I brought a book." She waved a copy of
Your Second Marriage: Make It Work
at me.
"Okay. I'll see you later, then." As I started to open the car door, Mom leaned toward me and gave me a kiss. "Do you think Daphne'll still be mad?" I asked her.
"I'm sure she'll be happy to see you, Jessica. She knows you wanted to help her."
I nodded, but I wasn't absolutely positive that Mom was right. Waving to her, I walked slowly across the parking lot and followed a sidewalk to the front door. Big beds of daffodils and tulips did their best to brighten the approach to the house, but even their cheerful colors couldn't mask its institutional appearance.