Damaged (new adult romance) (Never Leave Me, #2) (2 page)

I heard his words, but wasn’t sure whether or not to believe him. I wasn’t ready to let my guard down, again.

“Did you hear me?” he asked.

I nodded.

“My little brother found her curled up in pain in her bedroom early this morning. He called me and I called 911. I rushed over to the hospital.” He paused. “She went into emergency surgery.”

I threw my arms around him. “I’m so sorry.” My heart hurt for him and I prayed his mom was okay.

When I let him go, I asked, “What happened?”

“She had appendicitis. She’s okay, now. I’m sorry I didn’t call you, I should have.”

“No, you shouldn’t have. You did what you were supposed to do, which is be with your mom.”

“I had to come over and talk to you. I couldn’t let you think I had stood you up. I would never stand you up.
” He took my hand. “We only just met, but I’m already crazy about you. I wake up thinking about you. I go to sleep thinking about you. There’s something about you, it’s hard to put into words, but whatever it is…I want to be with you.”

His words made me want to cry. No one had ever spoken to me like that. No one had ever really wanted to be with me, not
even my parents. At nineteen, I had sat by my mother’s hospital bed when she was dying and begged her not to leave me. I wanted her to fight, to stay alive for me, because I didn’t want to be alone. I didn’t want to be an orphan. And when she took her last breath, I screamed at her. I told her I hated her.
Oh, Mami, I still miss you. Despite your flaws, I still miss you. I still want you back. But, you left me; you died when I needed you the most.

And
my father? He walked out of my life when I was twelve years old. He didn’t have the guts to leave me a note, to let me know it wasn’t my fault that he was leaving. He should have left me something, anything that would have let me know he didn’t leave me because of me. I was a good kid. Polite, kind, respectful. I never got into fights. I never talked back. I didn’t deserve the parents I got, but then, children don’t choose their parents. And I’m not the only kid who got the short end of the parent stick.

“I don’t know how to respond,” I said, tears forming.

He leaned in and kissed me. When his lips were on mine, I felt as if he was touching every part of my body, as if he and I were one, as if we were really meant to be together. Nothing else mattered. I was happy and I wanted him. I wanted him to kiss me forever, to make me forget my past, my sadness, and my demons. His mouth was so warm and I savored his tongue with mine. I felt drunk.

I realize I’m st
arting to sound like this is my first kiss. Let me put my heart out there to you. Here’s the truth about me and kisses. While yes, I’ve been kissed many times before, I have never really experienced a real kiss, not like this. Just like my sexual experiences, they were always rushed and I always had the feeling that the boy kissing me would rather have skipped straight to putting his hand down my pants.

When Reece
finally pulled his lips away from mine, he said, “You have no idea how badly I wanted to kiss you.”

Taking his hand, I said, “I’m glad yo
u gave in to your instincts.”

He let out a hushed laugh and gave my hand a peck. “What now?”

“I guess we start over.”

He smiled. “Does this mean I can ask you out on another date?”

“It means you can try. Just because I let you kiss me, doesn’t mean I’ll agree to going out with you, again,” I said.

“I see, okay, we
ll, I’ll give it a shot. Jadie?”

“Yes?”

He got down on one knee.

I started to laugh. “Whoa, what are you doing?”

“What do you think I’m doing? I’m going right to it. I mean why take another chance at a failed date? I think we should just go for it, don’t you?”

“Stop it! Get up. You look like a crazy person.”

“Crazy about you,” he said.

Blushing, I said, “If you don’t get up right this minute, I’m going to go back inside and never talk to you again.”

He stood and put his hand over his heart. “Ouch, you win. I won’t ask you to marry me. How about we settle on a date?”

“I think that’s a good start.”

“How about now?” he asked.

“Really?”

“No, just kidding. Of course, really. I’m starving, you?”

My stomach suddenly growled.
I pressed my hand on it.
Okay, okay, stop being so pushy.

“There is an awesome Chinese carryout place a couple of blocks from here. We can grab some f
ood and then go sit in the park,” I said.

“Let’s do it,” he said, grinning.

“Mind giving me five minutes?”

“But, of course.”

“I’d ask you in, but I’m pretty sure Lisa will start interrogating you. It’s probably best you wait here.”

He nodded.

I rushed to the bathroom to refresh myself. Comb my hair, put on some pink, no screw it, I’ll go for the red lipstick, and yep, let’s face it, my armpits could use a new layer of deodorant. Once I was satisfied with myself, I darted toward the door.

“I take it all is well with Mr. Hottie,” Lisa yelled from the kitchen.

“I’ll talk to you later,” I yelled back and disappeared through the front door.

Reece wasn’t in the hallway.
You’ve got to be kidding me!

I made for the steps. There he was at the bottom of the staircase, a smile on his face, a single rose in his hand.

“You look really pretty,” he said, once I had joined him.

“Is that for me?” I asked, pointing at the rose.

“No, it’s for your roommate, Lisa,” he said, quite seriously.

“Hate
to break it to you, but she prefers lilies over roses.”

“Ah, well, in that case,
I guess I better give it to you,” he said, extending the rose out to me.

I took it. “Thank you,” I whispered. I suddenly felt very shy.

“Thank
you
for agreeing to going out with me, again,” he said.

***

We spent an hou
r eating, laughing and talking in the park. He told me more about his book and I told him about the manuscripts I was reading for work and how some of them were really, really good, so good I wanted to publish them myself. It felt great to be with Reece and I wished we could stay in the park forever. A childish wish, for sure, yet I would have given anything to make it come true.

He walked me back to my apartment building.

“It was nice being with you,” he said.

“I had a great time.”

He kissed my cheek.

“I hope your mom recovers quickly.”

“Thank you. I’m heading back to the hospital.”

“Let me know how she’s doing.”

“I will.”

“Okay, well, I’ll see you, then.”

“Yeah, okay,” he said, not moving.

I started climbing the stairs to my building. When I reached the top, I turned around.

He was still there.

“All right, well, I’m going inside, now.” I put my hand on the door knob.

“Can I see you again?” he asked.

“I’ll have to think about it,” I replied and entered the building.
My heart was going to fall right down to my feet; I was so excited and so happy and so at peace.

***

It was 9 p.m.
Since I wanted to cherish the time I had spent with Reece, I went straight to my room and locked the door. My roommates would simply have to wait for the details.

I didn’t see Reece on Sunday, but he did call to tell me he missed me and couldn’t wait to see me. He was spending the day with his mom and his little brother. We agreed to meet for lunch on Monday. I’m not embarrassed to admit that I pretty much spent most o
f Sunday daydreaming about him. And yes, I filled Lisa and Grace in on all the details, eventually. They forgave him, but insisted I invite him over for dinner so they could get to know him better, which was code for,
interrogation.

Let’s face it, Lisa and Grace are really all I have and in all honesty, as much as they annoy me sometimes, I love that they care enough about me to want to make sure I’m not dating a creep who is going to hurt me.

Finally, Monday morning came around. I nearly fell out of bed, I was moving so fast. In what seemed like ten seconds, I was showered, dressed and out the door, on my way to work. I figured the sooner I got to work, the sooner it would be lunch time. I wanted to see Reece more than anything!

A few Metro stops later, I raced up the escalators and then dashed across the street. And right at th
at moment, right at the moment my feet touched the other side of the street, my throat started closing, my stomach started hurting and my hands started shaking. I couldn’t move. I felt that if I moved even one step, my body would break and I’d crumble to the ground.

There he was, just feet from me. My father. He was standing against the wall,
underneath the railroad tracks, staring at his feet. Reality began to dance around me, taunting me, laughing at me, and calling me a stupid, stupid girl. Was it possible that Reece had actually pushed out every thought I had about my homeless father? Selfish of me to have allowed a guy, someone I hardly knew to make me forget about my real life.

Damn my demons to Hell. How foolish of me to have even considered that a damaged soul could heal. I lowered my head in shame and urged my feet to walk. I’d not avoid him. If he recognized me, I’d face him and tell him who I was. No more hiding or running away.

Biting my nails and very nearly hyperventilating, I took a step and then another. The closer I got to him, the more nervous I became. And there it was still poking fun at me: REALITY. I scratched the back of my neck and kept moving. He didn’t notice me. I walked right passed him and he didn’t say anything to me.

“Hey!” I heard him yell.

I didn’t stop.

“Hey, come back!” he yelled.

I stop, but don’t turn around. No, I’m not ready. I can’t do this. I can’t face him. I’m feeling lightheaded. I can’t breathe. I’m going to faint. OH MY GOD, my father knows who I am. He’s calling out to me. I’m sweating. Someone help me. Please, someone blink me out of here. NOW, someone help me, NOW.

I swallow saliva and lick my lips. Then, I do it. I reach down inside of me, down to my very soul and I turn around. I see him talking to a woman. He’
s handing her a folder. She must have dropped it when she walked past him. It’s not me he was calling. I don’t have to talk to him today. I can put it off one more day, two days, maybe three. My lungs are filling with air again. I’m not shaking anymore. Today is going to be a fine day. A good day. A FAKE day. I can go on pretending I don’t have a homeless father. I can see Reece and talk to him and laugh with him and kiss him. All is well. Raise your head, turn back around and get your butt to work.

***

Waiting for me in front of my desk, was Mr. Walker and some guy I had never seen before.

“Perfect timing,” Mr. Walker said.

“Good morning,” I said.

“I want to introduce you to Thomas,” he said.

Thomas extended a hand to me. “Call me Tom,” he said, showing off his dimples.

“Today is his first day. He’s going to help us read manuscripts. I stole him from the Used-to- be-Big-but-Now-Sells-Nothing Literary Agency. Tom here has a great eye for what makes a good story. I want to grab him on his way up, before someone else does,” Mr. Walker said, winking at me.

WHAT?! This blonde hair, blue-eyed guy is here to take my job, outshine me. Okay, wait a minute, settle down. You’re still only Mr. Walker’s assistant.
Your job is to answer phones and schedule meetings and just because Mr. Walker is letting you read manuscripts doesn’t mean you’re suddenly some hot, up-and-coming literary agent. Don’t get outraged. Take a deep breath and smile.

“Welcome,” I said with a big ole smile.

“Here’s what I need you to do,” Mr. Walker said directly to me. “Give him any manuscripts you haven’t read yet.”

Keep smiling.

“What about the ones I’ve already read?” I asked, resisting the urge to snap at Mr. Walker.

Mr. Walker scratched his head. “Did you like any of them?”

“Yes, a few.”

“Okay, well, give him the ones you liked along with any notes,” Mr. Walker said. Then he faced Tom. “Look through those first and let me know what you think. If you agree with Jadie, pass them along to me, if not, set them aside.”
Turning to me, he said, “I’ll need you to write the rejection letters for the ones he puts aside, okay?”

“I’ve never…written a rejection letter.” I was fuming. Blonde Tom was now between me and Mr. Walker. No more going directly to Mr. Walker.