Crushing on the Bully (9 page)

“Like I said there’s a lot you don’t know about Skull and it’s his place to tell you not mine, but I can tell you this, he got himself in trouble tonight. I don’t know what you think but not Hugo or me or Lobster or anyone in Starless asked him to go,” the blond said.

“Where did he go?” Clarissa asked.

“To talk to some shady figures,” Lilac frowned.

“Like?”

“Now that’s not important, but I want you to know if we can help him we will,” the older woman said, “That’s what Starless does. It helps kids your age,”

Clarissa rolled her eyes.

“Oh, don’t you roll your eyes at me, Miss Thang, I know you don’t think of yourself as a kid, but when your forty-seven looking back, you’ll understand me then,” the woman laughed, “But no, we do help them or at least try to. Hugo and I founded Starless after we lost our son to a drug deal gone bad. He was young and just trying to find somewhere to fit in and hell, we didn’t know what to do for him. We figured he’d grow out of it, but he never got the chance. We laid our Garry to rest when he was only seventeen. Seventeen, sweetheart! Afterward, both Hugo and I took to drinking, but eventually we came to our senses and Starless was founded.”

“So Skull is doing drugs?” Clarissa asked.

“We don’t know that for sure, but I hope not sweetheart,” she said, “He reminds me so much of my Garry, but of course a lot of the kids we work with do. The little girl next door just adored Garry, she wanted to marry him and she pined away for years after Garry died. Eventually, she moved on and married, but he took part of her to his grave with him. He took part of us all.”

“What do we do now?” Clarissa asked.

The bar door swung open and Lobster walked out, helmet in hand.

“You gals just wait here,” he said, his mouth twisted into a grimace that he tried to pass off as a grin, “I’m going to take a ride over and see what I can do for the boy. Hugo wanted to go, but I didn’t think it would be a good idea, Lilac.”

“You’re right it wouldn’t be,” Lilac shook her head, “He’s too involved already. Too emotionally invested.”

“See you gals in a bit,” Lobster said as he straddled his bike, “Hopefully, I can bring him back to you.”

Clarissa not trusting herself to speak merely nodded and watched the trail of dust that his bike left behind.

“Let’s get back inside,” Lilac said, wrapping a friendly arm around Clarissa’s shoulder.

Clarissa wrinkled her nose and held her breath as she walked back into the AlleyCat Pub. Lilac smelled of perfume and cigarette smoke and the combination was making Clarissa dizzy. She glanced up at the clock and sighed. It was only one o’clock. She had only left work an hour ago. How had so much changed since then?

Lilac insisted that she join her and Hugo at their normal corner table. The older woman nervously chain smoked cigarettes and after the fifth Clarissa broke out into a coughing fit that shook her hard.

“Can you please quit smoking those damn things around me?” she asked standing up and heading to the bathroom, “It’s killing me.”

Clarissa washed her hands and face before returning from the barroom. She didn’t rejoin the others, but sat on the other side of the bar resting her head against the table. Her eyes darted from person to person, as she tried to keep an eye on where everyone was. She didn’t want any of them to catch her off guard. They might be trying to help Skull, but she still didn’t trust them.

She glanced up at the clock.

“One fifteen?” she muttered to herself and gently bumped her forehead against the table a few times, “Lobster only left fifteen minutes ago?”

* * * *

1:23AM

Clarissa ordered a soda and twirled the straw around the drink until all the ice melted.

1:46AM

Clarissa buried her face in her arms and took a deep breath.

2:00AM

Clarissa asked the bartender if he was sure the clock was working. He in returned assured her he changed the battery yesterday.

“How long does this normally take?” Clarissa asked, having never known someone who had been arrested.

“Depends,” Hugo grunted.

“On what?” Clarissa asked.

“The circumstances,” he said before returning his attention to his wife.

Clarissa bit her lip and balled her hands into fists.

“Easy for you to be chill about it,”
she thought to herself,
“Your wife is sitting right there. If it were her in jail, if you had seen her get arrested...”

2:04AM

Clarissa sprinted to the bathroom and locked herself inside the largest stall. She leaned against the solid wall and gently banged her fist into it as hot angry tears streamed down her face. She slid to the floor, but quickly forced herself to stand up.

“I don’t know what’s been on these floors,” she cried, “I’m never going to see Skull again and I’m going to catch something! Ewww! Ewww! Ewww!”

2:36AM

Having regained her composure Clarissa returned to the barroom and ordered another soda. She drank this one and then used the straw to swirl the ice around the glass.

2:59AM

“Did they arrest Lobster too?”
she thought to herself.

3:03AM

“Maybe Lobster wasn’t going to help him after all and they just wanted to keep me out of the way?”

3:15AM

“Should I call Julie? No definitely not,”
she shook her head,
“She’d never understand it and she’d blab to everyone. She might even call my parents! What the hell would I tell my parents?”

3:36AM

“Maybe I should just go home,”
Clarissa thought as she tapped her head on the table again.

4:00AM

“That’s it!” Clarissa declared, “I’m going to go find out what’s going on!”

Chapter Eleven

The roar of a motorcycle sounded in the distance, its soft purr turning into a growl as it quickly approached. Clarissa stopped mid-step and swallowed hard. Was it too much to hope for? She let out a sigh of relief when the bike came to an idling stop in the parking lot. She ran towards the door, but Lilac appeared next to her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Now, he might not have been able to bail him out,” she said softly.

Clarissa pulled away from the older woman and sprinted towards the door. She was reaching for the knob when it swung inward forcing her to take to long backward strides to avoid being hit. Lobster came through first, his bald head glistening with sweat.

“Did..?” Clarissa asked, finally exhaling the breath she had inhaled when she heard the bike in the distance.

Lobster gave her a lopsided grin and stepped aside.

“Skull!” Clarissa said and threw herself into his arms.

He flashed her a grin and returned the embrace. Clarissa rested her head against his chest and allowed the tension she had been holding onto to flow away from her, but then she remembered why she had been so upset.

“What the hell did you do?” she demanded, “What the hell is going on? You tell me you’re going to meet up with me later and then I drive by and see you in handcuffs and being put into a police car? I want answers and I want them now! I can’t do this anymore, Skull! I can’t keep playing this on again and off again game! Either we’re on or we’re off! Either we’re together or I’ll walk out of here tonight and never look back! I swear it! I swear it on the safety of everything I hold dear to me, Skull!”

“Your lover’s spat can wait,” Hugo said standing up.

“Shut up!” Clarissa yelled at him, “No, I’ve waited long enough! You’ve had your chance to help! More than one for the sounds of it! No, we’re doing this here and now! You just go back to chain smoking and give me a damn minute!”

Hugo’s eyes grew wide and Clarissa’s hands shook. Would he try to make her leave? Hugo was a skyscraper of a man, compared to her small frame, but she squared her shoulders determined to hold her ground.

She didn’t allow herself to relax until she heard the others laughing.

“You’re right kid,” he said looking at Skull, “She’s fierier than she looks.”

Clarissa turned back to Skull and arched a brow, “So what’s it going to be?”

“We told you not to go,” Lobster chuckled.

Clarissa rolled her eyes and locked eyes with Skull. His brown eyes looked excited and it made her want to smile, but she refused to give in.

Skull leaned in and brushed his lips against hers, but she pushed him away.

“No,” she said, putting her hands firmly against his chest, “Skull, I’m serious, and kissing isn’t going to get you out of it!”

The guys laughed again and Clarissa flipped them a bird over her shoulder without looking back at them.

“We’ll talk, but first I need to go to St. Louis,” Skull said, “As soon as I can my bike out of the impound lot in the morning.”

“St. Louis?” Clarissa asked, throwing up her hands, “What the hell is in St. Louis?”

“You’re not going anywhere,” Hugo said.

“You’re not my father, Hugo,” Skull said, stepping past Clarissa, “I’ve told you that before and I talked to a guy while I was waiting for someone to show up. He went to school with Aaron and he said he saw him last weekend in St. Louis! I’ve gotta go! This is the closest things I’ve found to a real lead! I’m going, even if I have to walk there!”

“Who’s Aaron?” Clarissa asked, stepping in front of Skull, not willing to be ignored for a man that smelled like a stale ashtray.

“You’re not going! It’s crazy!” Hugo said, “You keep chasing after him, but he don’t want to be found, boy! So what, he’s thrown his life away? I’ve tried to help! Just like I’m trying to help you! You have a girl who thinks the world of you for some reason I can’t logic out, but she does and you want to run off again?”

“Who’s Aaron?” Clarissa asked again, her lips trembling.

“Tell him he’s crazy,” Hugo said, “Tell him it’s crazy to go off on a wild goose chase, girl! Tell ‘em!”

“Shut up!” Clarissa said again, “I’ll tell him what I damn well please, whose Aaron, Skull? I’ll drive you to St. Louis tomorrow, I’ll take the night off and everything. I’ll take you, just please tell me what’s going on! I can’t take this anymore! I love you, Skull!”

The room fails silent and Clarissa listened to the breathing of the other occupants, which suddenly sounded incredibly loud. Every inhale and exhale the room made echoed around her mind. Had she really said that? Right here in front of everyone?

“Aaron’s my brother,” Skull said pulling her into his arms. Clarissa buried her face in his chest, thankful for a place to hide her bright red cheeks, “Look I don’t want to talk about this here.”

“Then when?” Clarissa asked.

“Tonight, but not here,” he said.

“Come on,” Clarissa said, entwining her fingers through his and holding tightly to his hand. She didn’t look back at the others, because she didn’t want to see their faces. She had never liked to let people down, but tonight was about Skull and her, not them. Her fingers were cramping by the time they reached Green Grandma, but she still didn’t want to let go of him.

Before unlocking the car she looked up at him and gently touched his cheek. He looked excited, but exhausted, his brown eyes were bloodshot and Clarissa hoped it was only from the lack of sleep.

“I won’t say it,” Skull said, “I won’t say it right now, it’s not fair to you, you’ll understand after we talk.”

Clarissa nodded and dropped her hand away from his to unlock the car. Sliding behind the wheel of Green Grandma wasn’t as familiar or as comforting as her old blue clunker, but she reminded herself any car is better than no car.

Upon arriving at her apartment complex Clarissa took a deep breath before getting out of the car.

“Nice car,” Skull grinned.

“You be nice to Grandma,” Clarissa laughed, thankful for the distraction from the nerves that were squeezing her stomach.

“Is this your Grandma’s car?” Skull asked.

“No, her name is Green Grandma,” Clarissa said as they entered the elevator heading up to the fourth floor.

Clarissa unlocked the front door and they both took their shoes off before stepping onto the carpet. She grinned up at him, both thankful and impressed that he had actually remembered this time. She grabbed two sodas from the refrigerator before rejoining Skull in the living room. He was sitting on the sofa leaning back against the arm. His pose was self-assured as always, but the worried look in his brown eyes let Clarissa know that he was more concerned about their ‘talk’ than he wanted to let on.

Clarissa sat down next to him, handing him one of the cans.

“Thanks, Bookworm,” he said.

“Not a problem,” Clarissa said attempting to keep her voice level, as not to betray the panic that was twisting her insides, “So, what’s up?”

“I don’t even know where to start,” Skull said, shaking his head.

“How about why you were arrested tonight?” Clarissa suggested.

“Because the charges were dropped,” Skull laughed.

“That doesn’t tell me why,” Clarissa crossed her arms.

“Because I was watching a house where a drug bust happened,” Skull said.

“What? Watching a house? Like spying on someone or something? Are you trying to play at being a government agent or something?”

“No,” Skull shook his head, “Nothing like that, unfortunately, because that would be a freakin’ cool explanation.”

“Yeah, too bad,” Clarissa laughed, trying to ignore the tension that had locked her shoulders and made her body ache, “So why exactly, were you there?”

“Looking for my brother or to be more specific I was looking for someone who might have had information to where Aaron might be,” Skull said.

“Is Aaron in trouble or something?” Clarissa asked, cocking her head to the side.

“That’s just it, I don’t know,” Skull sighed.

Clarissa touched his face and kissed his lips softly, but he was the one to pull away this time.

“Don’t or I’ll never be able to tell you everything,” he said shaking his head.

Clarissa nodded and sat back on her heels, settling her hand in his.

“When I was six and Aaron was twelve our father went down for a long time for heroin,” Skull began, “Our mom did her best, but Aaron was already determined that he had to be the one to take care of everything. Mom worked her fingers to the bones, but nothing was ever good enough for Aaron. He always wanted more, not that I ever blamed him. I wanted more too, but not badly enough to go the route he did. He was getting in with the wrong crowd by the time he was fifteen. Then when I was ten, our...”

Skull paused for a second and swallowed hard. Clarissa gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and reached out to touch his face, but Skull shook his head and looked away for a second. Clarissa took a deep breath and bit her lip. She felt guilty for making him talk about it.

“You don’t have to say anymore, I’m sorry,” she said, “You’re right, it’s none of my business.”

“Yes, it is,” Skull said, looking back at her, “If we’re going to be together, it is, because I won’t stop until I find out what happened to Aaron, if he’s alive or not. When I was ten and my brother was sixteen my father was killed in a prison fight. From what we heard he died lying on his dirty cell floor. When they went through his belongings they found that someone had been smuggling him drugs from the outside. They suspected Aaron was doing it, but they could never prove it.

“Things were going fine, but as soon as he turned eighteen he took off. He spent time in jail for a minor charge of assault, he called it minor, Mom was more pissed than I ever seen her. He was getting cleaned up, but then four years ago he just took off in the middle of the night. Mom and I tried to find him. Hugo and the guys helped us look for awhile, but eventually they all gave up.”

“But you didn’t,” Clarissa smiled at him.

“He’s my brother,” he said.

“I think it’s sweet. More than that it’s the right thing to do, but what if you can’t find him? Are you going to look forever? Are you going throw your life away, because he threw his away?” Clarissa asked.

She tried to keep her voice steady, but she feared that Skull would take everything she was saying the wrong away.

“What am I supposed to do just forget about him?” Skull asked.

“No,” Clarissa shook her head, before resting it against Skull’s shoulder, “I’ll take you to St. Louis tomorrow.”

“I’m going alone,” Skull said.

“I’m going with you,” Clarissa said.

“It isn’t safe, Clarissa,” he said.

“Exactly,” she said.

“You’re not going,” Skulls said, looking down at her.

“Yes, I am, Skull. I’m going to St. Louis with you even if I have to drive alone and follow you. There’s no law against going to St. Louis,” Clarissa said pulling away from him and crossing her arms.

“Fine,” Skull said.

They both quietly studied the other. Clarissa wondered what Skull was thinking about and if he was wondering what she was thinking about? Did things like that ever cross a guy’s mind?