Crimson Midnight (A New Adult Dark Urban Fantasy Series) (The Crimson Series Book 1) (25 page)

32.

SOME CLARITY, PLEASE!

Roman softly shut his bedroom door
and sat down on the edge of his bed with a soft thwump. Bent at the waist, he
held his head in his hands as if the mere action would calm his messy thoughts.

What was he doing?  If his mum
hadn’t walked in when she did, what would he have done?  He shook his head to
clear it. The fact was, that she
had
come home and he hadn’t done
anything, so it was okay…right? 

Damn! Who was he kidding? Another
few minutes and he would have buried himself inside Rose, fuck the
consequences.  He felt himself getting hard just thinking about it.  The feel
of her body under his, firm but soft in all the right places, the taste of her
lips, the naked hunger in her eyes, which made his blood heat.  How could he
have even thought that things could be normal between them? The attraction was
just too great, amplified by the forbidden fruit aspect of the situation. He
fell backwards onto the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling illuminated by moonlight.
There was no choice– he would have to distance himself from her. Polite but
distant, it was the only way to overcome these feelings. Eventually the
attraction would fade. If he was lucky he might even meet his bond mate, and
then the grip that Rose had on him would fade
.  But what about Rose?
A
small voice in his head asked.
Would it fade for her? Would it hurt her to
see him with someone else?
 

The thought of hurting Rose brought
to the fore a mess of protective feelings. He had it bad, if only…if only what?
If only he wasn’t a werewolf, if only she wasn’t so damn attractive, so
appealing, so…Rose.

He closed his eyes, shutting out
the moonlight. He needed Thistle, needed her badly.  He thought he would never
sleep but sleep claimed him, stealthy and unexpectedly, as slumber sometimes
has the tendency to do. He tumbled quickly into the land of dreams, into the
arms of Rose

33.

JUST FRIENDS

Rose woke earlier then she had
hoped and lay in bed trying to block out the chirping of the early bird and hoping
that the oblivion of sleep would claim her again. After ten long minutes of the
sandman being a no show, she admitted defeat and pulled herself out of bed.

Might as well face the music. 

She wasn’t working this weekend and
had planned a day with Faye, shopping, lunch then more shopping– Faye’s idea.
Before she could immerse herself in retail therapy, however, she needed to see
Roman, needed to sort things out with him.  Ideally, she would have loved to
speak to Thistle, get her head straight first. But Thistle would be unavailable
all week, some vampire holiday thing where they went off on a short sabbatical
or something. She shook her head as she pulled on yesterday’s jeans and a fresh
jumper– the mornings were getting chillier. Slipping her feet into her
slippers, she glanced at her bedside clock, which read half past seven. She wasn’t sure if Roman was working today, but if he was she wanted to catch him
before he headed out.  She needed to clear the air, to apologise.

She found him in the kitchen
spooning cereal into his mouth so fast she was surprised he hadn’t choked.  He
froze as she entered, then set down his spoon, sighing deeply. He stood
quickly, dumping his bowl into the sink.  Rose’s face heated as she realised
what he had been trying to do. The expression on his face when she had walked
into the kitchen was akin to that of a naughty school boy caught breaking into
the head master’s office– shock, guilt then resignation.

“Were you trying to avoid me?” she
asked.

Roman turned to face her. “I think
that’s best, don’t you?”

Rose exhaled in frustration.  This
is not how she expected things to be. “Look, I’m sorry about last night.  I
egged you on…I knew you were on the edge and I pushed you.  I don’t have any
excuse really. I guess I was listening to Miss Horny on my left shoulder. It
won’t happen again.” She looked him straight in the eye, her gaze open and
sincere.

He smiled tiredly. “But it will. I
could have stopped, Rose, believe me. I could have stopped if I had wanted to,
but the thing is…I didn’t want to and if mum hadn’t come back when she
did…well, I wouldn’t have stopped.” He shrugged. “We need to stay away from
each other, and we can’t be friends, not while this attraction is still
there.”  He was right, she knew that he was right. Then why did it feel like he
was squeezing her guts with his bare hands? 

It’s painful because you care
too much, because he’s right
.  The little voice of righteousness whispered
in her ear.

Shut up, annoying inner voice! And
where the hell were you last night anyway!
She scowled and Roman looked
slightly taken aback.

“You okay?” He asked.

She frowned, shaking her head, “Oh,
it’s not you. It’s that annoying little voice you hear sometimes. You know, the
voice of reason and morality? I was just wondering where the hell it was last
night.”

Roman’s eyes twinkled with
amusement. “And what did it say?”

She sighed, crossing her arms
across her chest, her lip curling slightly. “That you were right.” She rolled
her eyes.

He chuckled. “You see this is why I
lo-” he clamped his lips together, his eyes wide with insight.

Rose felt like she had been belted
in the gut.

“I have to go.” His voice was
strangled and uneven. “I’m already running late.” He brushed past her quickly
without making eye contact, but leaving the trail of fire on her skin where his
body touched hers.

Roman loved her…

34.

 ONE WEEK LATER

Roman knew it was going to be a
good day. He could tell as soon as he opened his curtains. It was a glorious
Saturday morning. There was frost on the ground and the air was crisp. The sun
was a burning disc in the blue sky and only a few puffs of white floated
across. Days like these were good days, happiness-inducing days. There was just
something about a sunny day that put the spring in your step and compelled you
to get out of bed.

Roman took a hot shower, singing as
he did so. He felt good. And then breakfast was his next thing. That was
surprisingly pleasant too. Rose, Flo, Erin and himself all sat together and ate
omelettes, which Flo had expertly prepared.  

Things with Rose had seemed to have
reached a balance at last.  After the Friday evening a week ago when they had
almost…anyway, after that night, and after their little chat the morning after,
they had been rubbing along just fine.  Not exactly avoiding each other but
chilling out more with others around. So far it had worked. Sure, there was the
odd moment or two when he would look at her and suddenly be struck by the way
the light played on her hair, or the sweeping curve of her lashes, but he was
quick to squash the thoughts.  So far, so good. He was actually pretty sure he
was getting over her, and getting over her meant they could go back to being
verbal sparring partners. And maybe even friends. She might even meet someone
and have a relationship and he could be happy for her
.

 And someone else would be
kissing her, holding her, burying himself inside her hot and tight
…Okay,
enough of that.  He’d cross that bridge when he came to it.  Right now, right
this moment, life felt almost good and he wasn’t going to let anything rob him
of that feeling. Anyway, he would be seeing Thistle in the evening– they had
prearranged the date a week ago.  Everything would be back on an even keel.

He smiled as he chewed the last of
his omelette.

“Another triumph,” he said to Flo
and kissed her on the cheek. “I could eat them all day.”

“Ain’t you sweet,” Flo said.
“What’s the catch?”

 Roman chuckled. “No catch. Just
feeling good.”

“He wants money,” Erin said.

Flo laughed. “How much do ya want?”

Roman raised his arms in faux
righteous indignation. “Can’t a man just express his love of a good omelette?”

“Oh, well I won’t get me purse.”

“There’s no need. Just telling you
I love your cooking.” He gave her another kiss before making his exit.

Flo looked surprised. “I thought
this would go back and forth for a few minutes until he admitted, in his way of
doing it, that he needed to borrow some money because he’d blown it all again.
It burns a hole in his pocket.”

“Maybe he is genuinely feeling
good.” Rose’s mouth twisted wryly as she regarded the doorway Roman had just
flown out of.  He had been more relaxed around her of late, even though she had
noticed they were never exactly alone together. She wasn’t sure whether it was
by coincidence or orchestration on his part. Regardless, it seemed to be
working.  Roman seemed back to his usual, flighty self.  Could it be that he
was over her?  The possibility wrought a mixture of emotions– relief and
disappointment and regret.

She tuned out the thoughts.
Producing a genuine smile, she turned her face up to Flo.  “He’s right about
the omelette though.”

Flo dimpled with pleasure. “Thanks,
sweetheart. Want another cuppa?”

“Yes please.” 

“I’ll stick the kettle on.” She
padded toward the doorway and called out. “Want some tea, Roman?” 

“No thanks. I’m going out.” Roman
called back. He appeared in the dining room shortly after, his coat on. “I feel
like enjoying the lovely sunshine. See you in a bit.”

“Bye.” Erin waved him off.

Rose refused to be miffed that he
hadn’t even glanced at her. This was good. This was how it should be…then why
did she suddenly feel so dejected?

“See ya, luv.” Flo called after
him. “Don’t know what’s put the spring in his bleedin’ step this morning,” Flo
said.

Thistle
, Rose thought.

Thistle would be back from her
break. Roman would be seeing Thistle this evening.  Thistle had put the spring
back in his step.  He was over her and Thistle was back.  This was the way it
should be. Thistle was her friend and she resolved to be happy for them.

Roman enjoyed being bathed in light
as he walked to Hammersmith tube station. The ground crackled under his feet
still coated in a sheen of frost and the air was sharp and refreshing. On his
way he encountered Mr and Mrs Williams, owners of the small green grocers, and
a very glamorous blonde woman with legs and breasts he’d like to see more of.
They all had a cheery hello for him– the blonde being more flirtatious than Mr
and Mrs Williams.

Roman was grinning as he descended
the steps to the platform. He chided himself for not getting the hot woman’s
number but in the next heartbeat dismissed the thought. Thistle was back and he
wanted to lose himself in thoughts of her. She’d been gone on her post-moon
stuff all week. She hadn’t come back the night before.

Most of the vampires did come back
exactly a week later, but they were allowed an extra day as long as they
reported in first. Thistle always took an extra day. He was looking forward to
her phone call later– and the marathon sex session to make up for her absence.
God knew he needed it. The thing with Rose had taken its toll and there was
only so much sexual frustration his beast would allow him to endure.  Thistle
understood that, that’s why they were so good together. They both fed each
other’s primal needs, at least until they found their rightful mates.

He was looking forward to throwing
himself back into his relationship and getting back to his playboy ways. It had
worked for him so far and the Rose thing would just fade away.

Yep, he could just tell it was
going to be a good day. Call it werewolf instinct.

The train pulled in and he boarded
it, bound for Central London.

Soho was alive this morning. And a
sense of euphoria filled the air. Roman absorbed everything around him, the
smells, the people, the colourful shops, the sounds. He loved it. He got some
bargain CDs from his favourite record shop and some heavenly, crumbly fudge
from a very small and cool sweet shop.

Two women passed him and he
accidentally tapped into their conversation as they walked by.

“She sent him a text message saying
that she really loves him and that she’s really lonely. She said why does he
have to be in the pub every night? She begged him to come home, begged him big
time,” said the woman with the dark bob.

 “That girl has got the biggest
heart,” said the other woman, a buxom blonde.

“Either that or really low self-esteem. 
I mean, I wouldn’t put up with that crap. If that was me he’d be out on his
ear.’”

The blonde nodded. “She deserves
better.”

“Absolutely. We need to get her out
to have some fun. Maybe she’ll forget all about him then.”

“I’d love to smack him right in
the…”

The conversation continued as they
walked further away, their voices dying out.

Poor girl,
Roman thought.
Hope
she sees the light and dumps the dick quick.

Roman continued his walk through Soho, passing bookshops selling books of art and fiction. Inside some of the books shops
were
XXX
neon signs with arrows pointing down to a staircase.

Roman remembered going into one of
these shops for the first time with Damon.

He laughed at the memory. He
remembered Damon’s perfect veneer of sophistication crack wide open as he
looked at the huge selection of porno down those stairs. In fact, Damon hadn’t
known where to look. He had stammered responses to Roman’s questions and turned
beet-red in the process. Yet, Roman was convinced Damon had secretly purchased
a few things that day.

An old man with a flat cap smoking
a pipe, wearing a brown wax jacket and jodhpurs, with a very prominent white
moustache, walked by. He tipped his hat to Roman.

“Morning,” Roman said.

“Good morning, young man,” the man
replied. He took a long draw on his pipe and exhaled.

Roman was not a smoker, he never really
saw the need or point of it, but he had to admit that he did like the smell of
the pipe.

“I do love these fresh October
mornings.” The man looked up at the sky then back at Roman.

“Me too. It’s a nice day for a
stroll.”

“Indeed it is, young man. There is
nothing I enjoy more than walking around my wonderful neighbourhood in the
morning with just my pipe and my thoughts for company. Taking a walk is good
for the mind, good for the soul.” He placed his left hand on his heart as he
spoke, tapping his chest when he said the word soul, as if indicating that his
soul was in his chest.

“Yeah, blows away the cobwebs.”

“Ah, the minds of the young.” He
took another puff of his pipe. “The minds of the young are so clogged up with
worry, with angst, with courting and love and sex and money. I remember it well
and it all seems so important. But one day you’ll see it isn’t, it won’t
matter. One day all of that angst will go and you will be free. It probably
won’t happen until your autumn years, or later. But one day it will. One day
you will see that life is the simple joys of a pipe and a walk. Pleasure is not
a complex mistress.”

“I don’t smoke,” Roman said
wistfully.

The man chuckled. “Then you will
have to find a pipe of a different kind.”

Roman had a few comebacks for that
line but decided against using them. “I’m probably the world’s biggest
pleasure-seeker. Believe me when I say I’m good at what I do. But no amount of
pleasure can take away the complexities of life. Unfortunately, we can’t live
simply for pleasure.”

The man puffed on his pipe. “You
can if you allow yourself to.”

Roman wanted to protest. He wanted
to remind the man about loss, sadness, pain, death, war, famine, poverty,
sickness, financial worry…but he held back. Maybe the man had seen his fair share
of those things. Maybe he had lost loved ones and suffered and now was his time
to enjoy his walks and his pipe. Roman felt his joy slipping away. He really
didn’t need these thoughts tainting his morning, didn’t want to wade into deep
thoughts.

The man tipped his hat. “Good day
to you, young man. I must bid you farewell. Maybe we will meet again on some
other morning walk.”

“Maybe we will.” Roman hoped they
didn’t. The experience had thrown a shadow over his bright mood. “Have a good
one.”

The man nodded and turned,
continuing his walk.

Roman’s pushed away his dark
thoughts clasping at the joy he had felt all morning, he wasn’t going to let
anything bring him down. Today was not a day for thinking. Anyway, the man had
been talking about pleasure. It was Roman who was thinking about the dark
stuff. So pleasure it was. This day was a pleasure day.

His phone started ringing. He
answered it. “Hello?”

“It’s Raven.”

“Hey, mate. Why do you sound so
glum?”

“Where are you?”

“In Soho.”

“We need to talk. It’s urgent.”

“Shoot.”

“I received a phone call this
morning from Alpha. Jeremiah contacted him. Thistle has not reported in. She
did not return last night and she did not contact Jeremiah to inform him of the
extra day.”

“What?”

“Jeremiah is deeply worried.
Richard has instructed us to be on alert. If she does not return at sundown
then she will be declared missing. We will be searching for her if she
doesn’t.”

“Shit, you sure? Shit, of course
you’re sure…shit!” His mind was reeling. He didn’t want to contemplate the
implications.

“I’m sorry, Roman.”

“No, don’t be, there’s nothing to
be sorry about. She’s probably having a blast, lost track of time…”

There was a long pause in which
Roman tried to convince himself of what he had just said, and Raven waited
patiently for him to fail.

“Shit!” Roman said, losing his
inner battle. Thistle wasn’t one to break the rules.

“Do you want me to come and meet
you?”’

“No, it’s…it’s okay. I’ll go home.”

And he did.

Sundown came, and so did the rain.
But Thistle did not. Raven came to the house along with two vampires, Anthony
and Jared. They all stood in the hallway– Rose, Roman, Flo, Raven and the
vampires. Erin was in his room playing X-Box. Damon, Kris and Harold had been
assigned areas to patrol– some of Thistle’s favourite haunts. Raven, Roman and
the vampires were to go to Soho together and search her favourite places in
that area, as well as all of the surrounding areas.

“The car is waiting outside,” Raven
said.

This wasn’t like Thistle. She was
not one to really break the rules, especially post-moon stuff rules. Thistle
knew how worried Jeremiah would be. But was she doing it deliberately? She’d
told Roman about her punishment, about the song she wasn’t allowed to perform.

“I can’t believe this,” Flo said.
“I hope you find her. This ain’t like Thistle at all.”

“Let me get my coat,” Roman said.
“I left it in my room.”

“I’m coming.” Rose burst into his
room shortly after he’d entered it.

Roman opened his mouth to speak and
Rose held up her hand to stall him.

“Don’t even try and tell me no,”
she said. “I know what’s coming. This is not a matter for me, or some bollocks
line like that. Well, tough. This is a matter that concerns me. I’m her friend.
That girl has been so good to me. When I was shit scared about all this supernatural
stuff, she was there for me. She made it okay, she made me feel like everything
was going to be all right.” Her eyes flashed with determination. “I need to do
this and I know I can help. I don’t know what I am and I don’t know what my
power can do. But I can kick arse if I need to.  I’m part of the supernatural
world now. I’m involved and I’m coming with you.” She finished, breathless.