Criminal Instinct (26 page)

Thursday
8:35 a.m.

Ana slowly rose from her hospital bed. Time to get dressed. Jay-man had brought her a change of clothes, then left to complete her discharge papers. She’d had to stay overnight in the hospital. Not that her injuries were bad. Sure, she looked like she’d been used as a punching bag—and felt like it—but the doctor had wanted to ensure she received rest. She was also dehydrated, and the task of having her malfunctioned tracker replaced needed tending to.

Come to find out, SIDE hadn‘t left her for dead in Tyler’s clutches. They had believed she was dead when they couldn’t receive a signal from her.

The Suits had busted the tracker, since it sat close to her skin without much protection. The high-tech gurus hadn’t considered all the dangers of the job, or that the locator might be worn by someone as small as herself.

A government specialist had flown into San Francisco with a replacement. Inserting it was a simple procedure done within thirty minutes, performed while she was awake under a local anesthetic. Just like the first time.

She brushed a few fingers across the bandage to the left of her chest. Yeah, she was still under someone else’s control. Still trapped by the law. But at least not behind bars.

Carefully, she bent at the waist and slipped on sweat pants over the gauze wrapped around her thighs.

The room spun.

She whipped on her pants the rest of the way then fell back on the bed, shutting her eyes. Still weak and undernourished. The only thing the nurses had let her eat was Jell-O and clear broth. They wouldn’t even allow her one sip of Dr. Pepper.

When she’d awakened in the bed last night, Sarge and Jay-man had been in her room. She hadn’t known what to think, but then Sarge had started drilling her for information. And all that had been on her mind had been Jonas.

“He’s fine,” Sarge had barked out. “Checked out and discharged. DEA will want their time with him, then he’s free. Tyler is the one they want. Mission’s complete. Saven is now out of your life.”

Jonas hadn’t come to see her.

While he had carried her to the yacht and what could have been their deaths, she’d thought something had changed between them, that Jonas had forgiven her for essentially being a spy. But now it was all over. For SIDE, Operation Deadly Adam was officially closed.

Saven is now out of your life
.

And he probably thought his life would be better without her in it.

Just like her mother had thought, and Max.

She’d shifted in the bed. “What happened? I remember hitting water, struggling with Tyler…then nothing until I awoke with the EMT.”

“You were unconscious when you were pulled out of the ocean,” Jay-man said. “Sarge performed CPR and saved you.”

Her eyes had jerked to Sarge. “Thanks. I—”

“Least I could do.” He’d crossed his arms. “Now. Tell me how you ended up with Tyler.”

Her voice went monotone while she told them everything that had gone down, starting when the Suits had taken her from her apartment.

Jay-man had looked at her with those sympathetic eyes, but Sarge was the same as ever—a hardass—shooting out questions left and right.

“What about the SIDE program?” she’d finally asked, bracing herself for bad news.

“The program’s still in effect. DEA will receive credit for stopping the Ecstasy shipment of nearly a half million PMA tablets. Unless the political system goes haywire, Tyler will be put away till he’s old and gray. The backers aren’t pulling the plug on the program.” His tone implied, “Until next time.”

The team was safe. That was what mattered.

But the hollowness in her chest told her differently.

“And I wouldn’t be worried about your SIDE review. You’ve passed. After all this—” Sarge’s hand flicked toward her, “—you never know, you might get paroled a year early.”

She‘d let out a breath, a relieved smile curving her lips. “Well, then. Is it Miller time?”

Jay-man had laughed and Sarge actually smiled. If one side of his bushy mustache lifting could be called a smile. It had been a rare moment.

Now here she was, having a hell of a time getting dressed. With great care, she rose from the bed and slipped off her gown. Just as she pulled her sweatshirt down over her stomach, the door to her room swung open.

“Damn, Skates,” Jax said to Paul as they both entered the room. “A few seconds too late.”

Paul smiled sheepishly, mixing pink with the fading yellow and green of his bruises. The door slid shut behind him.

Ana shook her head. “Yeah. Right.” No smart come-back today. Too damn tired.

She eased over into the hospital chair and put on her Nikes. “What are you two doing here?”

“Wanted to clear something up,” Jax answered. “Skates here couldn’t wait to see you. So he came along.”

She sat back in the chair, worn out just from dressing herself. “What’s there to clear up?”

He scrubbed at the whiskers on his jaw. “Looks like you won the bet.”

That made her smile. “Oh, you mean the sixty-four-thousand-dollar bet? The one that would tell us who was the
better
player?”

“What bet?” Paul wanted to know.

“Yeah, go ahead, rub it in,” Jax grumbled. “I guess you deserve it.”

“You bet your ass I deserve it.”

Jax scanned her face. The swelling in her eyes had gone down in the last twenty-hour hours since the takedown, but it would be a week before the bruises faded. “I’m holding up my end,” he said. “I’ll be out of your face for a week.”

She shrugged a shoulder. “Sounds like heaven, but it shouldn’t be hard since I’m on bed rest until further notice.” The truth was, sometimes Jax was okay. He still got on her nerves, but that was just Jax. Kind of like a good pair of underwear—nice and worn from all the washing so that they fit good and snug, only occasionally they rode up your buns and you had to snap them in place again. Not a glowing endorsement for a friendship, but it was still a major step up from her menstrual period.

“I won’t hold you to your end,” she told him. “It wasn’t like I would have honored my part if I lost.”

Jax gave her a sexy smile. Good thing she was immune. Sort of.

“What are you guys talking about?” Paul walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. He still had his broken fingers wrapped.

She ignored his question. “How are you doing, Paul?”

“Good. After I’m healed, Jax offered to help with extra training in our spare time. Help me get into better shape.”

Ana’s eyes widened a bit. They all knew Paul could use extra help besides SIDE training. “Nicest thing I think he’s ever offered.”

“I don’t know,” Jax said. “I’ve offered a lot of nice things to people. Offers…I like to keep open.”

Ana’s lips curved against her better judgment.

Paul nodded, not catching the underlying meaning. He looked down, suddenly interested in his black Converse shoes. “I’m glad you’re okay, Ana. I’m glad you’re alive.”

“Yeah, well, you’re not the only one.”

His blue eyes flicked to hers. “You’re my best friend.”

She still panicked a little at the way he looked up to her like she was some wise soul, but it was nothing she couldn’t handle. “What were you doing there that night of the takedown with Tyler? I’m pretty sure I saw the entire team.”

Paul seemed to straighten. “We wanted to see Tyler take the fall. It was a possibility he’d taken you out.”

“You mean…” They’d cared that something had happened to her?

“Yeah, we’d made a pact and Jax was going—”

Jax cleared his throat, cutting him off. “Should I leave you two alone?”

Ana eyed both of them seriously. “You were going to do what?”

Paul glanced at Jax, then away.

When no one said anything, she let it go. Something told her it would be better for everyone. “Why don’t you make yourself useful and tell me how you and the Black Dragons ended up on that yacht.”

“You haven’t heard? Somehow the Garcia brothers got word that Derek Meyer worked for Tyler, so they beat the crap out of Meyer and made him spill what he knew about the shipment’s expected arrival and destination.”

Ana lifted her eyebrows. Meyer’s battered face on Drag Night finally made sense. Gay bashing. Sure. “Too bad the jerk wouldn’t spill it to the cops when they brought him in for questioning.”

The door swung open again. Jay-man entered, pushing a wheelchair. Digit and Romeo stood in the entryway.

Romeo kept shifting his gaze to Digit, and it seemed like Digit did whatever she could to keep her back to him.

Could there be something…?

Romeo looked at Ana and smiled. “You ready to break out of here?”

“More than ready.”

Digit walked over, leaned down and gave her a hug. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

Ana patted her back. It was a small step toward getting over her aversion to touching. “Maybe,” she whispered near Digit’s ear, “we could talk sometime.”

Digit straightened with a smile. “Definitely.”

“Thanks,” Ana said, meaning it. She glanced around the room and in that moment realized they had all become her friends. Maybe even, for the first time, her family. In one week something had happened that hadn’t in the first six months they’d worked together. Maybe the Deadly Adam op was the one final step they’d had to take after several small ones, to make them form a solid bond. In this group, nationality didn’t matter. It was what they harbored inside and the depths they would go to for each other that were important.

She slammed the door on Max’s taunts that she had no one and never would. Max never really cared for her. He had felt obligated to fulfill a debt of a deceased friend. He had been a loner, a drifter, and he’d died alone.

She didn’t want to end up like him.

She would not live her life by his rules anymore.

“You know,” she said. “You guys are all right.”

Everyone laughed.

Jay-man pushed the wheelchair next to her. “Hop in.”

Ana stared at the chair with a curled lip. “You’re kidding.”

His teeth flashed, giving her the impression he would enjoy seeing her riding through the halls like a baby in a stroller. “Hospital rules.”

Great.

Monday
2:33 p.m.

In his office above Decadent, Jonas stared at his car keys lying on his desk. His fingers were steepled against his lips and his elbows rested on the leather arms of his chair in an effort to keep from grabbing those keys and taking off for Ana’s.

“Damn it. Where are you?” He blew out a breath and ran his fingers over his hair until he hit the band at his neck.

She’d been released from the hospital two days ago. It had taken everything for him not to walk into her hospital room when he’d been discharged. He’d learned from the desk nurse that she was doing fine and resting, and he had walked out to take care of his questioning with DEA, excluding information regarding his operations. He wasn’t ready to stop, not ready to give up his life’s work. He’d admitted to the relations between Tyler and his father, and hinted at Tyler’s vendetta against him. DEA may always have their suspicions about Jonas’s illegal activities, but they had no solid evidence on him. If he was careful, they never would.

He’d just wanted everything about Tyler over and behind him.

So he could move on.

But he couldn’t do that until Ana walked her stubborn little attitude back into his life.

Seeing her charge Tyler while he had a gun… His muscles clenched. She’d risked everything for him. That spoke to him, and his emotions, in a thousand different ways, yet it was something he couldn’t quite put into words. He’d always been the one who felt compelled to save someone.

This time Ana had saved him.

He was a man accustomed to getting his way. But merely getting his way with Ana wasn’t enough. He couldn’t order her to want to be with him. And hell, if he could, he wouldn’t feel for her the way he did. Their relationship would only work if she decided she
wanted
to be with him…

If he pressured Ana to be with him, he’d end up taking her for granted, not treasuring her the way she should be treasured. This was a whole new feeling, a whole new situation.

A whole new woman.

For him.

A knock at his door made him stiffen. He didn’t know who it was, but the last couple of days around Kara and Ray hadn’t been pleasant. “Come in.”

Ray walked into his office, leaving the door open at his back. “Do you need my resignation?”

Jonas relaxed against his chair. It was the first Ray had spoken to him since the night on Tyler’s yacht. “Do you want to leave?”

Ray’s eyes flickered. “No. I want to get to know my son. But I’m going to do that either way. I just want to know if you still want me here.”

“That depends.” He studied the man he had trusted like a brother. He’d been let down by having him keep a secret concerning Kara from him for six years. Though Kara was a grown woman, that didn’t stop Jonas from looking out for her.

This past week, dealing with the guilt of the deaths of his men, with having all his anger come to one boiling point against Tyler for the revenge of his family, and then almost losing Ana…it was enough to amend a man’s outlook on life.

Enough to learn how to forgive.

Ray’s expression was impassive, his eyes guarded.

“The truth is, you’ve helped me build what I have today. You’ve protected my family and me more times than I can count. That, I can never forget or repay. But I need to know…do you love Kara?”

Ray seemed to freeze for a few long seconds, and then he blew out a breath, his eyebrows pulling together. “Yes.”

The murmur of voices sounded just through the door.

“Hi, Uncle Jonas! Hi, Ray!” Elliott jogged into the room, Kara behind him clutching Elliott’s jacket.

As far as Jonas could understand, Kara and Ray hadn’t felt they were ready to tell Elliott the news that Ray was his biological father. Elliott had been only two when Tony passed away and he never spoke of him anymore, but they still wanted to take things slow.

Jonas studied his sister. She looked a little pale. Had she heard what Ray admitted to him just now?

It was still an adjustment to know Ray and his sister had been together. The morning when he’d entered his rooms above Decadent after hours of interrogation with DEA, Kara had been there crying. She’d confessed what had happened all those years ago. Jonas had gone out of town. Ray was supposed to be looking out for her, and they’d spent the night together. Kara had fallen in love. The next morning Ray had told her that he was upset he’d betrayed Jonas’s trust. He’d said he was no good for her, and against Kara’s protests, he’d left her alone. Kara, hurt and betrayed, had ended up pregnant and jumped into a marriage with Tony, who had adored her.

The years of tension between Ray and Kara now made sense.

But the way she’d knuckled under to Tyler’s threats, trying to handle things on her own, was still hard to accept.

Elliott jumped on his lap and wrapped his arms around him. He smelled of oranges, his favorite snack.

Ray shifted on his feet. He looked nervous.

“So I hear you’re going to a movie with Ray?” Jonas asked Elliott.

Elliott bobbed his head. “Yeah, then pizza an’ ice cream.”

“I bet you’re going to have a fun time.”

Elliott shifted his dark eyes to Ray, a little wary. “Can Mommy come too?”

The room fell quiet. Ray didn’t move, but Kara seemed to hug Elliott’s coat tighter.

“Sure,” Ray finally said, a little strained.

“This is gonna be fun,” Elliott said, jumping from Jonas’s lap.

Kara looked ready to bolt, until Ray looked at her. Something passed between them and Kara nodded.

“Here, baby, put on your jacket,” she said to Elliott. “You go downstairs with Ray, and I’ll be along in a minute.”

When Jonas and Kara were alone, Jonas stood.

Kara tossed her hair and raised her chin. But she ruined the tough girl act when her lower lip trembled.

Jonas opened his arms and Kara ran into them.

“I know I keep saying it, but I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “You believe me when I say I didn’t tell Tyler anything, don’t you?”

“Yeah, don’t worry.” He sighed. “Everything’s going to work out.”

For her, at least.

The verdict was still out for him.

“The team did good, Miles,” Jay said, when they were back at the office at the firehouse.

Miles nodded. “Yeah, not bad.”

“How are you feeling about the shipment being stopped?”

Miles looked at him. “You mean does it give me closure for Charlie?”

Jay nodded.

“Evidence didn’t point to Tyler for the Rave Massacre that took Charlie’s life. But stopping it from happening again is enough…for now.”

Thump—thump—thump.

Ana’s stomach was so tight it was as if a giant fist squeezed her insides. Her fingers were sore from cracking her knuckles, but she couldn’t seem to stop. She stood in the doorway of Jonas’s office, watching him pound at a black punch bag. Kara had let her into Decadent as she left the building. She had looked at Ana and said, “Don’t hurt him,” before she went out the door.

Thump—thump—thump—thump.

Ana’s eyes traveled down Jonas’s strong naked back as he whipped out his taped fists, his body in constant motion, his lean, jeans-clad hips moving side-to-side. He hadn’t been at it long. She’d watched him hang the bag, peel his shirt off, and start going at it.

It had been the longest three minutes of her life.

Abruptly he cursed, whirling toward her so fast she flinched.

His eyes widened.

Her heart stopped.

Then he charged.

She barely had time to step back when his hands closed around her waist, lifting her into a hug, her feet dangling above the floor. Her arms circled his damp neck as his mouth sealed over hers.

Her heart seemed to start again, increasing to a rapid beat. Warmth spread through her so damn fast, she thought she’d never be cold again.

He pulled his mouth from hers. “I thought you’d never get your little ass over here.”

She looked into those warm golden eyes. “You were waiting for me?”

“Damn right.” He walked them over to his couch and gently pulled her down so that she sat across his lap. He brushed back her hair with one taped hand, studying her colorful face. “How are you?”

Her throat tightened at the soft and caring way he looked at her. “Good.”

He lightly caressed her thighs. “Here?”

“Healing.”

“And…” His hand hovered over her tracker.

“Still tracking away.”

With his forefinger, he traced the delicate area under her left eye.

“I haven’t been sleeping so well since…”

“Nightmares.”

She nodded.

“Shit.”

“It’s okay. They’ll taper off soon. They usually do.”

He met her eyes. “What took you so long?”

She looked down at his bare chest. “I wasn’t sure you wanted to be with me.”

“That’s a bunch of—”

“But Paul answered a few things.” She raised her gaze. “He told me how you jumped into the ocean after me. I thought…you had to care enough for me to risk your life.” She shook her head a little. “But I still worried that if you looked at me with disgust, the way you looked into my eyes that morning when the cops came, it just might kill something inside me.”

He cradled her face. “I’m sorry for that. I had it wrong.”

“And I had given you plenty of reasons not to trust me.” Her lips curved. “I know that. It was just hard to take when everyone I’ve cared for has eventually left. How could I be with you, when I wasn’t even good enough for my mother?”

Jonas muttered a curse.

“I don’t know,” she spoke quietly, shutting her eyes. “I think she left me because I wasn’t the color of her skin.”

“Ana, look at me.”

She did. “Her skin was white. Mine dark. I have a memory of the time before she left. This woman was asking my mother if she had adopted me, because we looked so different. Maybe she left because she couldn’t stand to look at me—”

“Stop.” Jonas tightened his warm grip on her. “I’m sorry you’ll never know for certain why your mother left. But I want you to understand, it’s who you are inside that I care about. Everything that’s part of you, each nationality inside you, makes you special, to
me
.”

“That means more to me than you can know.” She swallowed past the tightness in her throat. “All these years I’ve felt inadequate for not knowing more about my heritage, walking a fine line between being Latina or white. Believing if I just ignored the culture my mother couldn’t stand within me, I wouldn’t feel so secluded from others. But the seclusion was mostly caused by my own choices, because I didn’t want to risk being hurt.

“I’ve been denying that part of my father that is inside me. I want to learn how he lived growing up. I want to learn more about my Mexican heritage.”

“I’ll be there with you to help.” His eyes softened. “When I couldn’t find you in the ocean…I lost it, Ana. I was going to tear Tyler apart.”

“Hey, it’s over.”

“Then I did find you.”

“I’ve been meaning to thank you.”

“I owe you thanks for risking your life for me. But don’t ever do it again.”

“Goes both ways,” she murmured.

Jonas leaned toward her, rubbing his lips against hers. “God, I missed you.”

She fell into the warmth of his mouth and the play of his tongue. Her body reacted instantly, her heart pounding, her muscles going weak.

“Wait.” She pulled back and held onto his smooth shoulders. His lips were shiny, his eyelids heavy. “I want to show you something.”

He grinned devishly. “Me too.” He glanced at her T-shirt. “Your shirt doesn’t apply to me, does it?”

Her white tee had Garfield the cat leisurely draped on a carpet, with Paws Off printed across the top.

She snorted. “Apparently not.” She carefully rose and went to the hallway to retrieve her backpack. Taking out the box, she settled back on his lap. She couldn’t help wanting to be physically close to him.

“Your box of hearts,” he said.

Her eyebrows pinched. “How do you know about it?”

“I came across it when I stopped by your studio.”

She should have been upset, but she wasn’t. She wanted to share this part of herself with him. Something she’d never done with anyone. She removed the lid and pulled out a palm-sized heart cut from a withered piece of foil. She told him about the janitor at the girls’ home who’d once baked brownies just for her. Then she replaced the foil heart for another one, and spoke about a girl who’d been a friend for a while before she was adopted.

She finally pulled out a white cotton heart with Max’s initials. “This is from my own T-shirt when Max first came to see me and told me about my father.”

“Will you tell me about both of them sometime?”

She nodded.

Jonas reached inside the box and pulled out the heart cut from his leather jacket. “And this is from the first time we made love.”

She nibbled on her lip, unsure with what he might say.

He set the heart back in the box. “There’s something I want to share with you.”

Curious, she replaced the lid on her box and set it beside them on the couch.

Jonas shifted with her on his lap and pulled out his wallet. It was still worn and cracked but at least it didn’t smell like rotten egg any longer.

“You wondered why I had this old wallet. It’s the last present I received from my mother, her last gift to me before she passed away.”

Ana felt tenderness spread from her chest to her stomach. Jonas was sharing with her something he cherished. He opened the leather flaps and pulled out a faded picture of a pretty woman with brown hair and topaz eyes.

“She’s beautiful.”

A smile touched his lips. “I think so.” He set the picture and wallet atop her box and shifted her more closely to him.

She took a silent breath. “Jonas, just to be clear, this thing with you and me… I still work with SIDE, and there are rules, and dangers. And you still have your life.”

“We can work through it.” He smiled that gorgeous grin. “I know it will be hard.” He ran a finger across the area of her shirt where her tracker lay beneath. “But I understand now.”

His eyes told her he’d come to terms with why she agreed to join SIDE and he supported her.