Authors: Billie Sue Mosiman
Nisroc had hungered for it always, true life. In God’s court there was but mind and spirit. But what He created on this planet was the true bounty--the experience of living man.
Now thanks to Angelique, She Who Ruled the Fallen, he was back. Back in the world!
The very thought propelled him. He came up as if loosened from chains, sitting straight, shoulders back, hips tensed. From this perspective the world seemed to tilt and skew for a moment. He closed his eyes, but the darkness behind his lids scared him, reminded him of the dark from which he’d come, so he quickly opened his eyes, his mouth falling open. He took a deep breath. He looked around.
Angelique was living such a meager existence. Her clothes, lying crumpled on the floor and hung from pegs, were ragged and faded. Her bed was made of rope, woven and tied, swinging from the ribs of the canopy that covered the wagon. She had a small chest, but without looking in it he knew there was little of value there.
Reduced to these circumstances he could understand why she needed his assistance. She had tried for three lifetimes to make it on her own, training humans to care for her. Losing her last human to death threw her again on her own where she’d discovered this job with the traveling circus. Naturally they had not wanted her, hadn’t believed she’d be of use—a ten-year-old waif with worn shoes and holes in her clothes. But she had convinced the Master of the circus that she had supernatural abilities dealing with his few wild caged animals. She could make them bend to her will. The elephant lifted front legs into the air on her command and danced when she made her biding. The lions sat on small stools and roared on cue. The panther, the best performer of all, slithered in a circle, its sinuous muscles moving like snakes beneath its skin. It could leap through a burning ring of hay bales and leap out again unscathed. It would go to its belly and let Angelique climb onto its back for a ride around the circus arena. It could even stand up on its back legs, taller than a man, and scream with a piercing cry, showing teeth that were a child’s nightmare. This panther, under Angelique’s tutelage, had become the star of the show.
In his dark place in the far regions of creation Nisroc had now and again widened his vision in order to see what Angelique was doing. He tried to imagine the scent of the animals, tried to hear the sound of the wind and rain, tried to feel the rest of true sleep, but all he could do was watch and hunger and hope.
Now she had deigned to bring him to her and he was so full of joy and appreciation that he thought he might burst.
He felt an itching on his back and sensed his great wings buried beneath his skin, but only as nubs, tiny buds of flesh that through the strength of his will he could cause to grow. Not now, of course. He had no use for them in this fine body of a man. But he knew they were there if ever he did need them.
He lifted his arms above his head and laughed. LIFE!
**
Angelique returned to her wagon after the show. The crowds were thinning, families trudging home to London and outlying farms. She carried a bowl of stew made from goat, potatoes, rutabagas, and carrots. Nisroc would need to eat. By now she expected he was able to move, but even though his angel being was renewing the diseased human flesh, he still needed to take sustenance just as any man would. He was now part angel, part human, the greater being angel. She was so excited he was with her. Human guardians were fine for a while, but tended in the end to be such a burden. Nisroc, on the other hand, was like her—nearly indestructible. Some accident might fatally injure the body, even kill it, but being angel made them both so quick, so sensitive to danger, that neither of them needed to worry overmuch about human death. Given the properties they had brought to the body from the angelic realm, it was as if they were a completely different, rare, and superior species.
She stepped onto the rear step they’d made for her small stature on the back of the wagon, drew back the curtain, and saw Nisroc sitting up on the floor, staring at her, tears in his eyes.
“
I can’t believe this,” he said. “It’s so…so wonderful.”
She climbed in beside him and handed over the bowl of food. “Eat, you need to bolster your strength.”
He didn’t need to be told twice. He ate like a ravenous dog, hardly chewing before swallowing. When the bowl was empty, he used his fingers to scrub out the residue of stew gravy. “Ummm, so good.”
“
As you see, I live in mean conditions,” she said, coming right to the point of why she’d summoned him.
“
It’s not a palace,” he agreed. When he smiled he was a beautiful creature.
“
You’re to be my father. When around the Others, treat me like your child. Speak to me as an adult guardian. But…” She squinted her eyes and Nisroc lost his smile. “…when we are alone, I won’t tolerate being spoken to without deference. I hope you understand that.”
“
Certainly.”
“
Because I can send you back. If I have to.”
Now he quaked, his hands taking on a tremor he couldn’t quite control. “I love it here,” he said.
“
I know you do. But the last time here you failed. This time you’ll do
exactly
as I say or I have no use for you. Understood?”
He nodded, not trusting his voice.
“
We’re getting out of this stinking place,” she said, beginning to pack the loose clothes in her chest.
“
Where are we going?”
“
To the wharf in London to buy tickets on a ship.”
“
Where to?”
“
The New World--though now they call it the United States of America.”
“
That sounds wonderful.”
She paused and eyed him. “I’m taking a chance fleeing this soon after your coming. You might not be ready to play your part.”
“
I’m ready!”
“
Who am I?”
“
What? You’re Angelique, Queen of…”
“No! I’m Angelique, your daughter. A child, Nisroc, I’m just a little girl.”
“
Of course.”
“
Don’t forget. Don’t mess this up for us, Nisroc. You’ll buy the tickets. Here…” She held out a soft bag filled with coins. “There’s enough there for our passage, but not much more. It’s taken me months to save it.”
“
What will we do once we arrive?”
“
Steal, what else? You’re not fit for work, except of the physical kind, and we’re NOT going with a circus, ever again. It’s filthy work, despicable. I hate it. In fact, when we leave I’m opening all the cages and letting the dumb animals free.”
“
Is that wise?” As soon as he’d asked the question he knew he’d made a mistake. He could never question her decisions, not ever.
She paused in the stuffing of her things into the small chest. She became as still as a snake eyeing prey, eyes unwavering. Her pupils contracted, morphed into pinpoints of darkness. Just the look of her was terrifying.
“
You’re questioning me?”
He hung his head. “I’m sorry, Angelique.”
“
Damn you and the reason I needed you. If only I hadn’t been trapped in this miserable child’s body!”
He said nothing and would not look into her eyes.
“
Never mind. Just don’t ask so many questions. Just do what I tell you and we’ll be fine. You’ll gradually feel natural in that body and back in this world. Now help me lift this out of the wagon. It’s time to go.”
***
Nisroc watched from the sidelines as Angelique undid the latches on the cages. It was dark and the only noise came from the wagons where other circus performers readied for their beds and sleep.
First, the panther leaped to the ground and lumbered to Angelique’s side to lick her hand. The lions growled low in their throats, surprised to be free in the night. Then the monkeys were let out and they immediately scrambled off into the darkness. The elephant was unchained from the iron bar attached to the back of the lion cage. It shuffled off, following the monkeys’ lead. Finally came the white wolf, an albino captured in the far north and sold to the circus. It stood at Angelique’s side as if it would never leave until she gave it a command Nisroc didn’t understand. Then it strode off majestic into the night. When all the cages were open and all the occupants gone, only then did Angelique turn to him and gestured that he lift the little chest to follow her.
On the way to the wharves Nisroc did not see even one of the freed wild animals. He had no idea where they’d disappeared, but since the circus was on the outskirts of London, he figured they’d headed away from the city rather than toward it.
He and Angelique found the ship that was bound to leave in the morning for their destination. She had him put the chest down near a shipping crate and then, folding her skirts, she sat cross-legged on the ground. She patted the space next to her and he folded his long legs and sat down. She snuggled under his arm, positioning her head on his wide chest. “Rest a while,” she said. “We’ll get the tickets at sunrise.”
He sat like a statue, his arm around her little shoulders. He felt her breathing slow then grow regular. She slept. He was too excited to sleep. Someone would have to knock him over the head to make him unconscious for he’d never give into it on his own. Not this night, his first night back on Earth, back in a human body, alive. He listened to the near waters of the sea as it lapped against the ships and pilings of the wharf pilings. He smelled the sharp scent of salt water and wet wood. He stared overhead at the night sky filled with stars. The moon had not yet risen. His thoughts recoiled from that vast overhead emptiness. It was where he had come from and he hoped not to go back there for as long as possible. Look at Angelique. She had carried this little child’s body through three hundred years and still it functioned. It did not grow or age, but it still lived just as any other human body lives. With angelic possession her body could go on for a thousand years. And so could his.
A thousand years!
His smile widened and his teeth felt the chill of the night as they were exposed to the slight wind sweeping across his face.
Just spending these few hours in a body was a gift beyond all measure, but the idea he might be able to live hundreds of years overwhelmed him. Tears stood in his eyes, but he refused to shed them. He brought his gaze down from the night heavens to the little girl’s face resting on his chest. She was a beautiful little thing, her skin dark, almost bronze, her hair raven, her lashes against her cheeks long and black and feathery. She was a small exotic beauty. Her little hand that rested on his midsection was perfect, tiny, unwrinkled, and so utterly beautiful. It was not going to be hard to adore her and follow her wherever she wished to travel. She was…angelic.
All night long he thought his wandering thoughts and let himself drown in physical sensations, the way only a newborn might. What a glorious night it was, the best of all nights, the ultimate in his experience so far.
***
Nisroc handled the buying of the tickets and getting them settled on the passenger ship bound for a new land. They were given a cabin with twin swinging hammocks and a small porthole looking out on the ocean at sea level. Neither of them suffered anything as pedestrian as seasickness, but it seemed Angelique found the cabin claustrophobic so she insisted they spend most of their time on deck.
This was a trial to Nisroc since it meant he stay “in character” while on the deck interacting with crew and other passengers. He was “Father.” Angelique was “Dear Daughter” as in, “Dear daughter, please don’t lean so far over the railing, you might fall overboard.” Or “My dear daughter has missed her mother, but the two of us have learned how to make do the best we can.”
He never failed to miss her silent cues so when on the third day of the long voyage a female child approached them where they sat in deck chairs, he knew there might be trouble. He felt it in the air, felt it on his skin like a cold cloak laid over him. Angelique stiffened in her chair and she darted a dark look his direction. He thought she hissed in displeasure, but he might only have imagined that.
The child kept coming until she stood in front of Angelique. She said, “Hi, my name is Daisy. What’s yours?”
Angelique spoke her name, but as she did so she turned and looked at Nisroc squarely on as if to say DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS.
He cleared his throat to get the child’s attention. “Uh, Angelique’s got a sore throat. She doesn’t feel like playing.” Angelique turned back to glare at the girl, but the other child picked up no clues at all.
“
That’s okay, I can just sit down beside you and we can play something easy. See this rock?” Daisy pulled a smooth stone from the pocket of her long skirt. “I found it on the beach weeks ago, during our travels to London. We can play catch with it.”
“
No, uh…” Nisroc began, but was interrupted by Angelique.
“
Sure, here, let me see it.”
Daisy handed over the favored souvenir to what she hoped would be her friend during the passage. As soon as Angelique had hold of the stone, she drew back her arm and threw it, causing it to arc high in the air and just fall short of making it over the rail into the sea. It slid along the rough boards before halting against the bulwark.
Daisy jumped up with a cry and ran to retrieve the stone. She turned back, tears in her eyes. “You tried to throw it away,” she said.