Coveting Love (Jessica Crawford) (44 page)

He stopped to gather his thoughts. He held her close, as if drawing strength from her presence.

“
The rest of the story I heard from someone, I don’t remember exactly who. Later that evening Mother wasn’t feeling well. It was hard work being a hostess. She was tired and hot, so she decided to break from her duties and step outside for some fresh air. Father was busy with his guests and didn’t notice her missing for a couple of hours. He looked all over for her, but he couldn’t find her anywhere. A search party assembled. They searched for hours, but there was no sign of her anywhere. It was as if she had just disappeared.

“
Several guests commented on seeing her with some man. Mrs. Parkinson finally broke down and admitted what my mother had confided to her. My father was angry and ran off blindly looking for her. Someone called the sheriff’s office, who took control. Many of the guests left, having grown bored with the search. Most people stayed out of curiosity and continued to enjoy the party, using the search as a catalyst for new conversation.

“
Some true friends stayed to help with the search. They were the ones who found her and my father, around midday.”

Jessica watched Brandon break down in front of her. He started weeping, and this time she did throw her arms around him, offering comfort as best she could. They rocked back and forth until he regained control. He continued with his tale.

“
The man had been holding her in a shack on the outskirts of the ranch. The shack, used many years before by ranch hands when they went on overnight cattle drives, had been abandoned when it became unsafe to use. Unfortunately, no one had ever bothered to tear it down. Matthew and I used to sneak out there and play.

“
Father was shot trying to rescue Mother. The sheriff found them both in the shack. Father was barely alive, and Mother was badly beaten. A life-flight helicopter came and took them to the hospital.

“
The man escaped and was never caught. No one seemed to have any idea who he was. Rumors went around about a sour business deal, but no one knew for sure. My parents spent several weeks in the hospital. They eventually made a full recovery, at least physically, but their mental state took a beating.

“
There weren’t nearly as many parties after that. The ones I do remember consisted of close contacts only. I used to go up to Mother’s room and sit with her for hours. I felt bad about what happened. I somehow felt responsible. If I had told Father what I had witnessed, it wouldn’t have happened.”

He stopped for a moment, not sure that he wanted to tell it all, and then decided she needed to know the truth. “Mother had been raped. Jeffrey is a result of the encounter. I suppose that’s why I have so much hatred toward him.”

Jessica made a sharp intake of her breath, shocked, but not wanting to show it. She caressed his arm. “You were a child. You couldn’t have known any better. Nothing was your fault. Just as none of it’s Jeffrey’s fault, either.”

“
I know that now, but I carried the guilt for a long time. I swore if I ever got my hands on the man, I would kill him.” He grabbed her arm, pulling her roughly along behind him.

“
Come on, I want to show you something.”

They ran to the stable, where Brandon quickly saddled two mounts. Practically throwing Jessica on her mare, he raced out of the stable. Her mare panted, trying to keep up with his stallion.

She shouted behind him, “Brandon, wait. Stop!” But it was no use. He couldn’t hear her. She did her best to keep up, dodging tree branches as they flew into her face. Twice her horse stumbled, and she feared they were going down. Both she and the horse were sweating profusely when Brandon abruptly came to a halt and dismounted.

He pulled her from her horse and ran through the field. They came to a stop in front of a large oak tree. Beside the tree was a broken down watering trough.

“
This is it; this is the place. This is where the attack happened.”

Tears welled in the corners of his eyes, but he swiped at them, like a little kid trying to be brave in the face of friends after being injured or scared.

“
They tore the shack down, but they can’t tear away the memories, or the damage the man did that day.”

He kicked the trough and wheeled on her. A storm raged in his eyes. She flinched— afraid he would strike her, as though his mother’s attack had been her fault. He was breathing hard, the tears flowing freely down his cheeks. This time, he let them flow. She tentatively put her hand out to him, and he pulled her roughly to him.

“
I’m so sorry,” he choked out, “I’m so very sorry.”

She didn’t say a thing; words weren’t necessary. She knew he didn’t blame her. She also knew he was holding something back. She wouldn’t push him. He would come around in his own time, and she would be there for him.

They mounted their horses, calmly this time, and rode side-by-side. Neither of them spoke.

“
Let’s stop here; the horses need some water.”

They pulled up to a stream and he helped her dismount. Then he led both horses to the edge of the stream, where they eagerly waded in. He came and sat down on the grass beside her.

She carefully watched the man she had promised to marry. He alarmed her with the ease in which he flew into a rage, and then amazed her at how quickly the storm would subside. Did she really know him well enough to marry him? Where had this doubt come from? She knew the answer; Jeffrey had put it there, Jeffrey and his persistent pursuit of her. She shivered.

“
Are you cold?”

“
Yes,” she lied, pulling her coat closer around her for effect.

He pulled her close, gazing into her eyes, the mask of rage and hostility he had worn earlier replaced by the gentle softness that she knew so well. He took off his own jacket and wrapped it around her.

“
We can’t have you getting sick now, can we?”

“
It’s been a long day. If you think the horses have had enough rest, I would like to go back to the house now. I think I’d like a nap before dinner.”

He nodded in agreement, whistled for the horses, and helped her mount. They rode back in guarded conversation, each of them being careful not to mention what had happened. Once they arrived at the stable, he turned the horses over to a groom. Then he escorted Jessica back to the house.

“
I can find my own way to my room.” She smiled as encouragingly as possible.

“
Very well, shall I come and escort you to dinner?”

“
That would be nice.”

He watched her as she walked up the porch steps and disappeared into the house. She was right; it had been a long day. The time was growing late. He was sure Matthew would appreciate some help with the closing chores.

Something had snapped in him that day. Feelings had surfaced that he hadn’t even known still existed. He must not let Jessica see that side of him again. He hoped he hadn’t already blown it with her. If only Jeffrey hadn’t stirred things up again, everything would have been all right. He was always stirring things up, damn his younger brother. Why did his mother even have to give birth to him? He was nothing but trouble, had been since the day she had conceived him.

He sighed and waved to Matthew, hurrying on to help him. He intended to make it up to Jessica. The rest of her trip would be spectacular. He would make sure she returned home with only positive memories of her visit.

**********

CHAPTER 28

Holidays were a major event in the Phillip’s household. They sought any excuse for a party and adorned the entire house in seasonal spirit. Thanksgiving was especially festive, and Jessica marveled at the sight of the exquisite china and fresh cut flowers that spread the entire length of the massive table.

It looked as if they intended to feed an army. Brandon assured her the guest list was actually limited, with only a few close family friends invited. She sighed in relief. The thought of meeting so many people who were a part of Brandon’s life, all at once, overwhelmed her. She was later horrified to learn that a limited few turned out to be fifty.

Brandon laughed at her unease and reassured her he would stay by her side. “Nobody expects you to remember their names,” he had gently coaxed. She played her part well, though, and many of the guests were familiar with her work, which gave her a subject to talk about that she loved, easing the social inadequacies. She even promised a few of them she would photograph their homes and families, after she and Brandon were married and she went into business for herself.

The more she walked around the expansive house and met the extensive staff, the surer she was she would wind up with nothing to do to occupy her time.

The idea of self-employment had come to her during a conversation she had with John. They had been playing around with different lighting techniques. One of the marketing directors had stopped in to say hello and had his young daughter in tow. She was dressed for a school play, in which she was playing the part of a fairy. On a whim, Jessica asked if she could photograph her. He consented, and a roll of film later they were looking at magic. The girl’s father was amazed at the photographs and offered to pay her for them. She laughed it off and gave him all the pictures. But something about the incident had started her thinking.

“
Put a country setting to that and we’ll have a masterpiece,” John had joked. That’s when the thought struck her; she would be living in a country setting.

The interest his friends showed in Jessica and her work thrilled Brandon, and he began to relax a little. He wished she would consider moving the wedding date up, but she wouldn’t budge. She wanted a spring wedding and nothing he said would change her mind. “Besides,” she had told him. “I need more time to prepare for this. It’s going to be hard for me to go from being a full-time photographer to country wife and mother,” she had teased.

“
Mother?” he had inquired, raising his eyebrows.

“
No, not yet,” she had said. “I know we said soon, but why wait. I think we should start right away.”

He had wrapped his arms around her in a romantic embrace, bending her backward and kissing her.

“
Have I told you lately how very much I love you? You’re wicked and have cast a love spell upon me.”

She laughed and the happiness had shown bright in her eyes.

He remembered that day well. It was on one of his trips to the city. They were having dinner at her apartment, in front of the fire. They were discussing their plans for the future and he hadn’t been quite sure how to broach the subject of a family. He wanted to start one right away but anticipated an argument. In fact, he spent the entire trip thinking of reasons for not waiting, but he didn’t need any of them.

“
When is the wedding?”

“
I’m sorry; what did you say?” Brandon pulled his attention back to the party.

“
I asked when the wedding is.”

It was one of his father’s oldest friends asking the question. Brandon hated to seem rude, but the sight of Matthew and Jessica laughing easily in the corner distracted his mind. He hated seeing them together. He didn’t like the way Matthew was fawning over her. He had to put a stop to it.

Ignoring Mr. Simpson, he started toward the two of them, intent on setting Matthew straight. His mother’s personal attendant stopped him midway. “Excuse me, Mr. Phillips.” He looked at her impatiently. “Your mother is ready to join the party now.”

He glanced angrily at the couple in the corner. He would have to deal with Matthew later.

Despite her health, Virginia Phillips insisted on being present at significant social gatherings that went on in her house, especially the holidays. She didn’t stay long, but she made an appearance nonetheless.

With the help of her eldest son, she painfully made her way downstairs. They had installed a chair lift five years previous, making the task somewhat easier. As Brandon seated her in the chair, she grabbed his hand.

“
I know that look, son. I’m warning you not to blow it with this young lady. She’s a gem. Don’t push her away,” she warned.

He knelt in front of her. “That’s what I’m trying to do, Mother. But Matthew and Jeffrey keep getting in the way.”

“
Jealousy over your brothers is going to get you in trouble. Matthew isn’t after your woman. He doesn’t have time; he’s too busy being a father and running this ranch. Now, Jeffrey is another story. I know all about the rivalry between you boys, and I think I’m a fairly good judge of people. I know Jeffrey is no saint, and I know he loves a good challenge. You only succeed in encouraging him when you play into his hands. Marry this girl, and do it fast. Get her away from your brother, but don’t push her away with your jealousy.”

He kissed her cheek. “Thank you for your support. I wish you could talk some sense into Jessica. I’d get married today if she would consent, but she wants a big wedding in the spring.”

Virginia shook her head. “You might not have that long.”

“
That’s what I’m afraid of, too.”

He pushed the button that would carry her chair down the lift. She never ceased to make a grand entrance. Because of the diamonds and emeralds that her beloved husband had insisted upon showering her with, she always sparkled. Not that she minded in the least, though. She loved to turn heads, and she was well aware that in her day she had turned quite a few.