Covertly Strong (The Strong Series Book 1) (31 page)

Although his words are playful, his tone is anything but. The pain in his face is brought to life with each downward swipe of his thick lashes over his beautiful eyes.

“There are so many things I want to tell you, Nix.” She runs a frustrated hand through her long locks. “God, I want to tell you everything. I
hate
this. I hate the fact that I can’t let you all the way into my world, but I want you to understand something, I’ve let you into the most important part of me.” She sits up on her knees as she gazes down at his prone form. She places his hand on her bare chest. “You’re in here, baby. You are in my heart and in my soul, and my love for you is running through my veins—feeding life into every single part of me.”

Her eyelashes flutter, releasing three single tears from her eyes. Each tear makes a slow descent down her cheeks, marring her face with the sadness that aches incessantly inside her chest.

His thumbs reach out and softly brush the liquid emotion from her cheeks. “Meli, I love you, and I promise that nothing will stand in our way of being together. This is it—
you and me.
We have our second chance, and I won’t let that slip through our fingers this time.”

“You promise?”

“I more than promise, sweetheart. I am giving you my word—my absolute guarantee—that we will have a future together,” he pronounces with strong conviction.

“Okay.” She swallows the sadness that fills her throat. “I have a feeling that, once I get back from Guadalajara, I’ll be making some big decisions—life changes.”

“I’ll support you, no matter what you decide to do. I’m here, and I’ll have you in any way I can get you,” he affirms to ensure that she doesn’t feel pressured to alter her current life—her current career choice—just because she’s afraid she’ll lose him. Although she’s never told him the true nature of her job, he already has a pretty good idea of what she’s wrapped up in.

“Thank you.” Her fingers find his and they entwine themselves together.

His hand grasps hers, holding it tight to his chest. “No thanks necessary. We’re in this together, remember? You and me.”

“Now that we have all of that settled…” she trails off.

His eyes perk up with intrigue, ready to hear more.

“I have some plans to keep us in constant contact while I’m away. Phone calls will be hard, but I’ll try to find a way to hear your voice without a way for anyone to trace the call back to us. Now, emails…” A meaningful expression encompasses her face as she observes his reaction to that one word.

Nix chuckles despite the painful memories that the sheer idea of emails awakens. “Fucking emails. The one thing we should have done from the start, right?”

“Exactly,” she laughs. “With the help of someone I trust with my own life, I’ve started each of us an account that I can ensure has zero affiliation with our real-life selves. They can’t be traced to anyone because they can only be accessed from a secure site. We’ll just have to be careful what we put in those particular emails just in case—”

“You know, speaking in code with you is one of my favorite things,” he interrupts.

“Perfect.” Her lips quirk up into a faint smile. “Now, this is probably more important for me rather than you, but it might be in our best interests if we ensure that the devices we access our email accounts from never leave an easily accessed trail. It helps that the emails can only be sent and received from a secure site. The person who created the site—specifically for us—is pretty special to me, and well, his computer-hacking skills are downright unbelievable. He’s worked with some—”

An index finger over her lips stops her from saying anything else.

Nix chooses to stop her little speech before she inadvertently reveals something she shouldn’t. “Meli, I trust you. You don’t have to tell me anything else. Just know that I trust you and we’ll get through this.”

Sloan nods her head in understanding.

“All I want to do right now is hold you in my arms and enjoy the last few hours we have. Okay, babe?”

“Okay,” her lips gently whisper as she lies beside him.

His strong arms pull her close. His warm breath brushes her skin as his lips place a soft kiss to her forehead. “You and me, Meli.
You and me
,” he professes as a yawn escapes his mouth.

“Always,” she confirms as her eyes lose the battle, fatigue sliding her lids closed.

Nix watches her nearly sleeping form for a few quiet moments, his eyes memorizing every inch of her. He hates that she will be leaving in a few hours.
God, I’m going to miss her so fucking much.

“Stop staring at me.” Her quiet voice surprises him. “It’s creepy.”

“I’m only creepy for you, baby,” he teases.

“Well thank fucking god for that,” she retorts in a tired voice, her eyes remaining closed.

“Throwing out F bombs and busting my balls,” he responds with feigned annoyance. “What in the hell am I going to do with your sassy ass?”

Sloan’s only response is a soft laugh as she burrows her little body closer to his. Her chest moves up and down in easy motions as her breathing begins to slow.

After another yawn leaves his lips, Nix finally lets his eyes fall shut.

Sleep serving as life’s metaphor for time, it begins to take hold, pulling them down slowly and then so quickly that neither has time to fight against it.

AGENT MATTHEWS STEPS OUT OF the black town car and efficiently begins to load Sloan’s luggage into the trunk. His smooth strides and calm demeanor are the polar opposite of how she feels. Nix stands beside her, his hand firmly grasping hers as they slowly make their way towards the door of the vehicle.

Their hands mirror their hearts’ sentiments—refusing to disconnect from one another.

She turns towards Nix, her eyes taking in every inch of him. His messy, brown hair and cerulean eyes. The strong jaw with several days’ worth of scruff. And his mouth—
his oh-so-perfect mouth
, which is highlighted by a small, bittersweet smile that encompasses his otherwise masculine face.

“So I guess this is goodbye, huh?” she asks quietly while the familiar sounds of the morning rush hour buzz around them.

“Nah, baby. This isn’t goodbye. This is just see you soon,” he declares as his strong arms pull her into his warm embrace.

Their bodies line up seamlessly, like two puzzle pieces. They are each other’s perfect match. Their hearts and souls are intangibly connected, their minds subconsciously in tune and their spirits inherently aware of one another.

“This is just temporary, Meli. We
will
keep in touch and you have my word that we’ll find our way right back here.”

Despite her melancholy mood, she laughs against his chest. Each breath she takes inhales his all-too-familiar smell—aftershave and clean laundry and just pure Nix.

“What?” he asks with curious amusement.

“I never thought I’d see the day where Nixon West would be willing to embrace technology. Adult hood looks good on you,” she jokes as her russet eyes peer into his.

“I’m gonna miss that mouth full of sass, baby. I’m going to miss it so fucking much.” His fingertips brush her cheek softly.

Her eyebrow rises in delight as a smile crests her lips. “Oh don’t worry. I can dish the sass in email too.”

Nix exhales a frustrated groan. “Oh god, I can only imagine. You and all that sass with the opportunity to say anything you want
without
having to worry about me throwing you over my shoulder and spanking your glorious ass? I have a feeling you’ll find creative ways to continue busting my balls despite you being thousands of miles away from me.”

She grins.

He smiles down at her before pulling her heart-shaped face to his, and his strong lips meld gently with hers.

Agent Matthews clears his throat in their direction, breaking the moment quicker than it started. “Felicia, we need to head out,” he announces.

Sloan leans back and looks into Nix’s deep, blue eyes. “I love you.
Always
.”

“I love you too, Meli.
Always
.”

With always being their promise of forever, Sloan slides into the back seat.

Nix closes the door. His gaze never leaves hers as Agent Matthews starts the engine and begins to pull out onto the main road.

“I’m sorry, Felicia,” Agent Matthews voices from the driver’s seat. “I wish I could have given you more time,” he pauses as a meaningful look fills his eyes. “I’ve never seen you so happy. It looks good on you,” he adds with a bittersweet smile.

Sloan’s only response is to smile back at Agent Matthews before turning around, her body kneeling in the back seat. Her hand rests against the cool glass of the rear windshield as she watches the reason for her happiness slowly disappear in the distance.

She looks at him once more, her heart aching with infinite longing and her lungs struggling against infinite sadness. Her heart cries,
Just him
. Her soul whispers,
Always
. And her mind opens itself up to the possibilities of a future—in the gray area of life—with Nix by her side.

Guadalajara, Mexico—
a place where black and white collides with gray—where everything isn’t always as it seems…