County Line Road (10 page)

When Jimmy got home to change clothes, he found Linda sitting in the darkened living room, curtains drawn, and television low. A cigarette dangled from the fingers of one hand and she held a glass of whiskey in the other. She wore a big t-shirt and jeans but no shoes.

“Hi, Jimmy,” she said, sounding a little drunk. “Have a drink.” She raised her glass.

He turned it down with a hand motion, hoping he could just get through the living room to his bedroom without incident. He felt the tension start in the pit of his stomach again, but he knocked it out of him, envisioning it as a baseball he hit out of the park.

“Oh, I forgot,” she said, slurring her words. “You’re going to be Mr. Big Track Star at Clemson now that you and your Daddy are buddies again.”

“Is he here?”

“No, just us,” she said. “Alone as usual. And it will probably get worse, after what you said to him.”

“It’s not my fault you’re —,” he paused. He was going to say she was cheating on him, but he remembered what his father had said, that it wasn’t his business. Jimmy turned to go.

“Wait, Jimmy,” she said. “You’re the only one I can talk to. I’m not really mad at you.”

She lurched up out of the armchair and cornered him. She stood so close to him, he could smell the liquor and cigarette smoke on her breath. The smell was sour, not like she’d just taken a sip but the smell was old, a rotten smell. His stomach turned from the stench.

He saw for the first time that she wasn’t trying to get his attention with her tight clothes but that she was actually sad and lonely. He’d never thought of her as a real person before, only as a manipulative stepmother, who was always trying to ruin his life.

“We were always such special friends,” she said. “You let me rub your legs that year you grew four inches in one summer, remember?”

His head began to ache from the cigarette smoke that filled the room and the tension creeping up his shoulders.

“I’d come in and smooth your hair while you were sleeping and your father was away,” she continued. “You were lonely for your mother after she left. I get lonely too. Sometimes people make bad decisions when they’re lonely. I never meant to hurt you. You know, about your father’s baseball.”

She tried to reach for his hair. He grabbed her arm and jerked it back.

“I knew it,” he said. “I can’t believe you did that. You almost ruined my life. What’s wrong with you? I’m not some kid you can wrap round your finger anymore.”

“What’s different now? Look around.” She waved her hands drunkenly. “There’s nobody here! What do you care? You’ve got your little girlfriend now.”

“Don’t talk about her,” Jimmy said.

“I’ll do whatever I want,” she said. “I’m not the one with steroids in my system.”

“What?”

“That’s right,” she said. “I had some from work and a few tablets may have gotten crushed up and put in your food and Gatorade. I think I’ll call the coach to ask him about drug testing.”

She stumbled toward the phone, but Jimmy blocked her.

“You’re lying,” he said. “You must be crazy.”

“Not like your mother,” she said and laughed.

“Shut up!” Jimmy yelled.

“You tell your father you lied, or I’ll say Rich gave you the steroids. Then you’ll both go to jail.”

“You can’t do that!”

“I can and I will,” she said. “And the police will believe me. You know about Ritchie’s past, right?”

Jimmy was breathing hard. He tried to get a grip on himself to think what to do.

“I’ll tell Rich!” he said. “And my dad. They’ll stop you.”

“Tell your father you lied about me,” she said, angry.

“No,” Jimmy said. “I won’t lie. I’m not like you.”

“Ha. That’s it then,” she said. She looked at her watch. “Aren’t you late for a concert or something? Have fun! Oh, and don’t worry, I haven’t told your father you stole a necklace for your little whore, not yet anyway.”

Jimmy was seething with rage that flashed through he veins so fast it actually hurt.

She stumbled to her purse and jingled her car keys at him.

“Gotta’ go to work,” she said. “Better got some coffee on the way. I have to help in ER tonight. Gotta’ be on my toes!” She looked down at her feet. “Oops! Need shoes. And a uniform. Ha, ha!” She shook a pack of breath mints from her purse. “Oh, I better have a few of these too!” She popped some mints in her mouth and went into her room, fumbling to pull her t-shirt over her head as she shut the door. “Bye bye!”

Jimmy watched her disappear behind the door as if he were seeing a circus show, some bizarre surreal act he could not comprehend. The slam of the door brought him to his senses. He ran to change into jeans and bolted out the door to Double A’s house. He had to find Rich.

That night, driving to the concert, Jimmy, Allison, and Double A sat in the front seat of Double A’s Cutlass 442. The red paint gleamed in the street lights like the car was fresh off a showroom floor.

“I have to find Rich,” Jimmy said. “I hope he’s at the concert. He said he was going. I can’t believe she would do that. Just when I was starting to feel sorry for her. Do you think she did that? I mean put steroids in my food?”

“I don’t know,” Double A said. “Does it work that way?”

“Yeah. If she did, it will be out of your system faster if you drink a lot of water,” Allison said. “I heard that back in school from a guy on the football team.”

Jimmy looked at her.

“Did you ever take anything?”

“And grow a beard?” she said. “No way.”

“I’m sorry,” Jimmy said. “I’m really freaked out right now. Can we stop at a convenience store and get some water?”

“Yeah,” Double A said.

They went into a store and Jimmy guzzled from a liter bottle.

“Slow down,” Allison said. “Not that much. You’ll flush the minerals out too.”

“I’ll do what I have to do to make sure,” he said.

“No one is going to test you tonight,” she said. “We’ll get this figured out, okay? We’ll find your brother, and maybe your dad can help.”

“I’m not sure what I’d tell my father now,” Jimmy said. “Let’s go to the Sportatorium and look for Rich.”

They rode out of their neighborhood and were soon inching along in traffic.

“Why did you take Sheridan Street?” Jimmy said. “Sterling is faster.”

“No way,” Double A said. “It doesn’t even go all the way through. We’d have to get back on Sheridan anyway. I know how to get there.”

“Drive faster,” Jimmy said.

“We’ll get there faster if we don’t have to stop and wait for the police to write me a speeding ticket and then for the ambulance to pick you up after I beat the crap out of you.”

“Very funny,” Jimmy said.

“Just trying to lighten the mood for a minute,” Double A said. “We’ll get there. I’m driving as fast as I can.”

“You’re driving me over edge!” Jimmy said. He laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Allison said.

“His father used to say that all the time,” Jimmy said. “When we were kids, tearing up his vegetable garden in the backyard when we played soccer, that’s what he always said to us.”

“My dad says, ‘This doesn’t add up.’ ” Allison said. “He must have been born a banker.”

“Like my father,” Jimmy said. “Born a pilot. I remember my dad saying to me and Rich, ‘This ain’t gonna’ fly’ whenever we did something and got caught.”

“And you always got caught,” Double A razzed Jimmy.

“You weren’t no angel,” Jimmy said. “Don’t let him fool you.”

“None of us are angels,” Allison said.

“That’s the truth,” Jimmy said. Jimmy remembered that he had not told Allison about him getting arrested. He didn’t want to say it now and maybe ruin everything. He decided he’d tell her later, when he thought of exactly how he’d tell her.

When they reached the intersection of County Line Road and Sheridan Street, Double A waited for a break in the traffic and made a right turn onto County Line Road to join the stream of cars heading in the same direction as if on a pilgrimage.

“Finally, County Line Road,” he said. “It’s not that far. It usually doesn’t take this long to get here, but this traffic sucks. The Sportatorium is right down there.” He pointed for Allison.

“Remember when we tried to ride our bikes all the way down to County Line Road to fish in that lake by the Turnpike at night?” Jimmy said.

“Don’t tell that story,” Double A said.

“You rode your bikes all the way down here?” Allison asked.

“This was a two-lane road then, no houses, nothing,” Double A said.

“And it was dark. We were in the seventh grade. We get down there and he’s scared the whole time saying we should go back,” Jimmy said.

“And you got us in trouble by riding your bike on the exit ramp,” Double A said. “The toll plaza lady called the police. My mom never let me sleep over Jimmy’s house again.”

“I guess I owe you a whole bunch of apologies,” Jimmy said.

“When you get your big Nike or Reebok endorsement deals, send me a few million,” Double A said. “Then we’ll call it even.”

“If all this blows over, you got a deal.”

All around them, other cars were full of people with music playing, windows open, everyone talking and laughing. Double A waved to people they knew and pointed them out to Allison. Jimmy looked at every motorcycle to see if it was Rich.

With the music blaring, Double A tapped his fingers on the steering wheel and Jimmy drummed on the dashboard in rhythm to the song on the radio while waiting at the next light. The light changed and Double A hit the gas and took off down County Line Road. Rows and rows of orange trees zipped by as fast as the music. The further west they went, the fewer houses and shops there were. Only construction sites and pastures and Melaluca trees with their white papery bark flaking in the wind.

As they neared the Sporatorium, Double A had to slow down and inch along into the parking lot with all the other cars. He tried to avoid the pot holes but couldn’t go around them all. As Double A eased the 442 through Gate 13 at the Sportatorium, the car dipped and bounced across the dirt lot.

“Thirteen. Is it lucky or unlucky 13?” he asked as the car bounced over pot holes, splashing muddy water on his side panels. “Oh, man, my car.”

“Lucky 13,” Jimmy said. “I think I’ve had all the bad luck for a year. Do you see Rich anywhere?”

“No,” Double A said. “I’m sure we will soon.”

Attendants with glow sticks waved cars down the dirt aisles. Double A parked at the end. “We’re almost on the other side of the parking lot,” he said. “We could have come in that entrance.” He pointed at a gate nearby where cars streamed in, stereos blasting.

They parked and walked toward the auditorium through the dirt parking lot. Allison tried to brush the dirt off her sneakers, but it only smeared and looked worse.

“Are those new sneakers?” Jimmy asked.

“Yeah, but that’s all right,” Allison said. “I’ve decided I’m not going to worry about anything tonight.”

“Me neither,” Jimmy said and put his arm around her. “I’m getting new running shoes tomorrow. Want to go with me?”

“Sure,” she said.

When they reached the entrance, Allison paused to look up at the ten-foot high concrete wall topped with barbed wire that surrounded the auditorium.

“This is where you guys see concerts?” she said. “It looks like an airplane hanger on a military base, or a prison.”

“This is the best place to see shows,” Jimmy said. “The crowd is wild, the place is ragged out and no one cares. It’s just a free for all.”

At the gate, a muscle-bound guy with a shaved head inspected their tickets, tore them in half, dropped half in a trash can and gave them the other half while reciting the rules of no bottles, no cameras, etc.

Inside the wall, people milled about talking, buying beer or souvenir T-shirts from kiosks set up in the area that surrounded the auditorium like a dirt moat around a castle. Double A wanted to buy a T-shirt, so they went over to look.

Stepping through the metal doors of the arena, Allison was bombarded by the sounds and smells. The air was a smoky haze, and the noise of the people and the taped music echoed off the concrete floor and metal walls into the huge space trapped in this giant metal and concrete warehouse. Rows of seats swept all the way around in a horseshoe from one end where the stage was set up, across the back of the auditorium and back around. Another level ran above the first with a chain link fence lining the railings of the upper level and all the hallways and stairwells like nets or cages. The floor section seats weren’t bolted down, only attached to each other in long countless rows.

She looked down all the way to the front row and saw the stage sat partially lit. A wall of speakers, like a honeycomb, rose on both sides of the stage and across the back. The drums were on a raised platform and scaffolding ran up to the rafters above the stage. A ceiling of lights hung overhead, looking too heavy to be up in the air. The chrome of the microphone stands, amps, and drum kit glinted in the lights.

“Let’s go upstairs and walk around,” Jimmy said when he saw Allison looking around the arena. “There’s a balcony up there, and you can see the whole place. Maybe I can spot Rich.”

They climbed up the concrete stairs with the crowd. Once upstairs they looked over the fenced railing at the floor section. People next to them leaned over the railing smoking cigarettes and drinking beer from plastic cups.

“Our seats are right there, close up to the front,” Jimmy said and pointed.

It was hot and humid upstairs, and Allison felt clammy with sweat. “It’s so hot in here. Can we buy beer?” she said.

“Yeah,” Jimmy said. “I’ll get it. It will help flush out my system. You want one?” he asked Double A.

“Yeah, get me one. Here.” Double A dug in his pocket for money.

“Nope,” Jimmy said with a smile. “I got this.” He waved some cash and turned into the crowd and headed for the nearest beer vendor.

Allison and Double A leaned on the railing, watching people go by. He saw Jeff and called his name. Jeff looked around until he saw Double A and waved. Jeff had Jeanie on one side and another girl Double A didn’t know on the other.

“Hey, Jeff!” Double A called. “You seen Rich?”

Jeff shook his head No, and then he was absorbed into a group of girls and guys who hugged all three of them like a family just arriving at an airport.

“Jeff is never without girls,” Allison said. “Couldn’t Anna come to the concert?”

“No, her parents wouldn’t let her,” he said. “They say they’ve heard stories about this place. Not that anything’s going to happen to us. But that’s okay. I wouldn’t want to do anything to make her dump me.”

“Why would she do that? You’re great,” Allison said.

“When I got grounded I thought she might,” he said. “Thank God that’s over. But even before that, I used to wonder why she was going out with me. Sometimes, when I pull up to her house to pick her up, I’m afraid she’s going to come to the door and laugh at me and say, ‘Yeah, right, like I’d ever go out with you,’ but it doesn’t happen.”

“And it won’t,” Allison said. “What did you get grounded for?”

“I was with him when he got arrested at the mall,” Double A said.

“What! He got arrested? When?”

“You didn’t know?” Double A said. “He didn’t tell you? Oh, shit.”

“What are you talking about?”

“He’s going to kill me,” Double A said, pacing.

“Tell me.”

“Okay. Why not. I’m in it now.” He explained.

Jimmy came back with the cups of beer.

“I could buy two six packs for the price of these,” he said as he passed the cups out.

Allison handed him the necklace. “I don’t accept stolen property.”

“What? I didn’t steal that. Wait.”

She was heading down the stairs.

“Why did you tell her? I was going to.”

Double A was speechless, but he wouldn’t have been heard anyway because Jimmy ran after Allison.

He caught up with her on the stairs.

“I did not steal this,” he said, necklace in hand.

“You got arrested,” she said, trying to push through the crowd. “And didn’t tell me. I was honest with you about everything.”

“I’m sorry,” he said. “Please look at me. It was a stupid mistake. I was embarrassed to tell you, but I was going to.”

“I trusted you enough to tell you about my sister, something very hard for me to talk about, but you don’t even trust me enough to tell me this,” Allison said. “I already live with two people who don’t talk to each other. I don’t need that with you.”

“I’m sorry,” Jimmy said. “You’re right. I don’t want to be like my parents, especially not my father. You’re the only person I ever met who even gives me a glimpse of how I want to be. I promise I won’t ever do anything like this again.”

“I know,” she said. “We both have a hard time trusting anyone.”

She hugged him, and he held her.

“Come on,” he said. “Let’s get out of here.”

He got them through the crowd and back to the entryway.

“Wait,” she said. “Give me a minute.” She breathed in deep and exhaled. “I don’t want to just go home and sit there, thinking about my sister. There’s no way past this but through it. I’m all right. Let’s go back in.”

“Are you sure?” Jimmy said. “I mean, I don’t care about this show. If you aren’t in the mood –”

“I’ll get in the mood. Who said ‘Fake it til you make it’?”

“I don’t know.”

“Even if you’re not sure you’re going to make it, you have to try,” she said. She wiped her face. “I must look great now. Raccoon eyes.”

“What’s that?”

“When your make-up smears.” She rubbed under her eyes.

“Not my make-up,” he said, trying to joke.

She actually laughed, much to Jimmy’s relief.

“Yours looks great. Let’s go in.”

They joined the stream of people going inside like salmon running up a river.

They had to show their ticket stubs to get on the floor section for their seats. Double A was already there. They squeezed in past the other people who were already in the row and sat down on the metal chairs.

“Thank God,” Double A said. “I didn’t know what to do, so I figured I’d come here to the seats anyway.” He waved to the seats. The beer they just bought was sitting there. Double A had carried them downstairs.

“It’s all right,” Jimmy said.

Allison nodded in agreement and then saw the cups. “You saved the beer!”

“There is a God,” Jimmy said.

They all toasted that sentiment and drank. The crowd was filling in the seats all around them, and it was getting loud.

Allison finished her beer and looked around for a place to put her cup. Double A pointed under the seats. She bent over to put hers down and caught a glimpse of all the other beer cups strewn under the seats, most of them crushed from being stepped on. When she sat up, the guy behind her started talking to her. He was really stoned and couldn’t focus on her face. She couldn’t hear a word he was saying and squinted at him.