Continuum (30 page)

I try to gather myself before I call Ethan, but the overflow of emotion is nearly impossible to contain.  He’s not landing in London for several more hours but he has a layover in New York between flights.  I don’t know how to begin saying goodbye and pray he doesn’t answer his phone.  It takes me several minutes of slow concentrated breathing before I am crying and not sobbing.  It takes several more before I find my voice.  With shaking hands, I dial Ethan's phone number.  

He picks up on the third ring, breathing a sigh of relief as he answers, “Hey, Fallon.  I meant to call you but I had to call my mom first or she freaks.  She kept going on and on about her gift to Scott and how she wanted me to wrap it.  I don’t have much time, I’m about to board my next flight.”

I can’t control the trembling in my voice, “Ethan, I’m so sorry to drop this on you like this.  I don’t know how to say this.  I’m... I’m not coming to London.”

His silence stretches for an eternity, I can hear his breathing change before he replies, “I don't understand.  What’s going on, Fallon?  Is everything okay?”

I take a deep, shaky breath, “It's complicated, Ethan.  The time has come.  I have to leave.”

“What do you mean you have to leave?”

“I mean... I'm leaving Earth.”

“Why now?  What happened?  I just left you a couple hours ago,” his voice is fearful and uncertain.

I desperately want to tell him everything, to try and make it all right.  But I can’t ignore Zefa’s advice.  The less Ethan knows, the safer it will be for him.  “There’s a...situation. My father needs me.”

“What could your father possibly need you this suddenly?  I don't understand why you have to leave right this instant.”

I feel like I’ve aged an eternity since I left school, “Ethan, does it matter when I leave?  You knew I would have to leave eventually.  It’s better this way.  I feel myself growing more attached to you everyday.  I can't keep going on like this with you.  The longer we prolong this... it will just be harder for you.”

His voice is quiet with disbelief, “You can't just leave me like this.  Please, Fallon, tell me you don't really think it’s better this way.  Tell me you want to stay.”

The hurt and accusation in his voice is a crushing pain inside my chest.  It takes my breath away and I can barely whisper back, “I don't have a choice, Ethan.”  

“You're your own person.  You don’t owe him anything.  What has he done for you?  He’s been absent most of your life.”

“It's not that simple.”

He’s getting frustrated now, desperation in his voice, “It can be that simple.  You can't just leave!  I... I need you.  I have never felt this way about anyone before.”

“I will always care about you, Ethan.  I'm so sorry.  I wish there was another way, but there isn't.  Please trust me when I say it's for the best,” my voice is hollow as I try desperately to keep my tears in check.

“I thought you had finally let me in.  I feel foolish.”

“I never meant for it to get to this point.  But you have to understand nothing lasts forever.  We were meant to go on different paths.”  

“I think I love you, Fallon.”  And those six words are uttered with such despair, my resolve nearly shatters.  It is also a painful reminder of why I need to leave. 

“Goodbye, Ethan.”

With shaking hands, I hit end and quickly flip the phone over and remove the battery.  I let the dissembled parts fall onto the floor.  I pick up the sketchbook with the drawing of Ethan from the night we first kissed.  Studying his face, a teardrop falls onto the page smearing the image.  “I think I love you, too.”

I meet Zefa in the living room with my packed suitcase.  My entire existence fits inside a single 29 inch suitcase.  How pathetic is that?  Zefa told me I would need my warmest clothes, so I've changed into a long sleeve thermal shirt with two chunky knit sweaters layered over it and long thermal underwear under my jeans and two pairs of thick wool socks.  I have a tight lid on my emotions, waiting until we’re far away enough to let myself go.  I'm running on autopilot as I dig out my winter parka and waterproof boots from the hallway closet.  

Zefa takes a quick look around, “Is there anything else you need?”

“No, I'm ready to leave.”

He nods and heads toward the front door.  I follow Zefa out of the house, not bothering to lock the door.  I get into a nondescript black sedan parked on the curb next to my driveway.  He pulls out into the street and turns left at the end of the block.  I don't look back.

We drive 50 miles out of the town limit to the state forest preserve.  Once there, we drive up a winding gravel path deep into the heart of the forest.  The sun has long set and there is a dense canopy of trees, making anything beyond the glow of the headlights invisible.  But Zefa knows his way, he pulls into an empty parking lot by one of the hiking trails.

“We have to go into the woods to get to my ship.  It's dark out but I know the way.  I don't want to attract any unnecessary attention with lights so just hold onto me so you don't get lost.”  I nod in agreement, remembering the sharpness of his night vision from the memory he showed me.

Zefa unloads my suitcase from the sedan and carries it by the handle.  He starts walking away without locking the doors, “Wait, what about the car?  Are you just going to leave it here?”

He pauses, “The authorities will find it in the morning and it will be returned to its rightful owner.”

I am incredulous at his blasé tone, “You stole this car?!” 

“Not exactly.”

“Oh, so some stranger just lent you his car?”

“Not quite.  I was not entirely forthcoming earlier.  I wanted you to trust me.  The other aspect of my gift is that I can plant memories with my touch.  Izic knew you would not trust me even if I showed you the memory.  That is why he gave me the fan.”

I grind my teeth.  Lying to gain my trust.  This night was full of surprises and revelations.  “I’m going to have more questions about that later, but we should get going.  Wouldn’t want to get caught with stolen property.”

With that, we head into the line of trees twenty feet away from the parking lot and I grip a fistful of Zefa’s jacket.  I've hiked along every trail in this forest preserve, but the descent into the woods is eerie in the complete darkness.  Every twig that brushes against my skin, every critter skittering along the forest ground, every twig that snaps under my boot makes me want to jump out of my skin.  I press my lips tightly together to suppress my scream as my hand brushes through a spiderweb.

After a long walk in silence, Zefa announces in a whisper, “We are nearing the ship.  Just a few more minutes.  You have to be careful walking through this area, there are a lot of fallen branches.”  

We carefully navigate for a few more minutes when Zefa suddenly stops short and I smack right into his hard back, almost falling backward.  

“We're here.”  He reaches into the inside of his jacket and pulls out a flat round device.  He presses it against the second line tattooed on his left forearm and it flashes once.  Then right in front of me, his ship slowly shimmers into sight.  I am too exhausted, physically and emotionally, to be amazed by the sight.  The ship is an unassuming round white pod with smaller circular skylights all around it and a large round windshield in front.  The royal crest is painted on one side in a brilliant shade of red. 

Zefa steps up to the pod and presses his forearm against a small black screen on the side of the wall and a light scans the rings on his arm.  A door appears in the seemingly blank wall and stairs slide down with a quiet hiss.  As I board the pod, the reality of the situation hits me.  These were my last moments on Earth.  I was never coming back.  I look down at my covered wrists.  

I had not felt this alone in a long time. 

Ethan

I hit redial for the twentieth time.  It rings once and goes straight to voicemail.  Cursing loudly, I throw my phone to the ground.  It splits open with a clatter, the battery skittering across the tile before sliding to a stop in front of the large window that faces the tarmac.  Everyone in the terminal turns to stare at me, whispering to their companions.

I clench and unclench my fists.  I drag my hands through my hair and down my face.  I want to punch holes into the drywall until my knuckles are bloody.  I want to scream until there’s no air left in my lungs.  I want to cry until my tear ducts are dry.  But the other passengers are already staring and whispering about me.  I lean my forehead against the cold glass of the window and look out at the plane parked outside the terminal.  The plane that is going to take me to London.  I had no way of getting back to Everest Heights.  Not that it mattered anyway.  Fallon was already gone.

In the back of my mind, I had known one day she would have to leave.  I didn’t expect it to be so sudden and without warning.  I had been setting myself up for heartbreak from day one.  My heart clenches painfully in my chest as I remember our last kiss on the sidewalk in front of the school.  The last time I would ever see the girl I love.

The woman on the intercom announces that my flight has begun final boarding.  I peel myself away from the window and pick up the scattered pieces of my phone, stuffing them into my backpack.  I head to the stand and hand the gate agent my boarding pass and walk through the tunnel onto the plane.  

Taking my seat next to the window, I pull out the pieces of my phone.  I press the battery back in place and slide the back panel on.  The screen is completely shattered from the impact.  Catching my fragmented reflection in the black screen, I can’t help but wonder how I was going to pick up the pieces of my life.

Fallon

It takes us a few hours of traveling faster than light speed to get to the Elkipi sector.  As we approach Planet 213, I am struck by the sigh of it.  It reminds me of a snow globe--a snow globe in the middle of an asteroid field.  The whole planet seems to be covered in thick layer of white clouds. 

As we start our descent, I am surprised at how unnaturally calm I am.  Numb is probably a more accurate description.  Going to London was going to be the first stamp on my newly acquired passport.  Now I'm about to land on another planet in a different sector of the universe.  I am far from excited.  I don’t even feel my usual terror of traveling in a vehicle.  I am too emotionally drained to feel anything.

We descend under the cloud cover and the planet below us is covered in thick layer of perfect, untouched snow.  Everything from the mountain tops to the plains are covered in a layer of white.  The ship touches down behind a mountain in a puff of white powder.  The planet might be habitable but not particularly desirable to live on.

I undo the harness that's strapping me to the seat and stand up, “I'm going to go for a walk, I need to get some air.”

“There's too much carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.  You can't go out there, we're going to be staying on the the ship.  There are sleeping quarters and bathing facilities back there.”

“What about food?”

“We have enough supplies for months.”  Stranded on an alien ice planet with only Zefa to keep me company.  I might just walk outside and save Epir the trouble of hunting me down and killing me.

I go through the door of the cockpit and enter our living space.  Built into the curve of the wall is a set of oblong, slightly rounded bunk beds.  There is a curved table with matching curved booths bolted into the other wall.  I walk to the tail end of the ship through a pantry stocked with packages of dried and canned food.  At the very end is the bathroom, it’s very utilitarian with a single stall shower, toilet and a small sink mounted into the wall.  The surfaces are all made of a matte steel with the same rounded shapes.  The mirror isn’t even made of glass, just a piece of steel that has been buffed.

The whole set up is quite depressing.  The whole situation is quite depressing.  Stranded on an alien ice planet with only Zefa to keep me company.  I might just walk outside and save Epir the trouble of hunting me down and killing me.  His no non-sense, yes sir attitude is grating.  That and the fact that I knew he was just following my father’s orders to protect me.

Silently as possible, I roll my suitcase to the sleeping area and sit down on the bottom bunk.  The bed is made of a material that doesn't sink underneath my weight but instead instantly conforms itself to support me.  The foreignness of everything is suddenly overwhelming.  I unlace my boots and kick them off next to the bed.  I slide under the covers and roll onto my side facing the wall.  

A few minutes later, I hear Zefa quietly approaching.  He pauses next to my bunk but then he climbs up and settles into the other bed.  I stare at the bottom of his bunk and listen as his breathing evens out and deepens as he falls asleep.  I lay like this for many hours.

When I awake the next day, Zefa is already up and sitting at the table eating breakfast and working.  There are dark circles under his eyes and he’s still wearing the same clothes from yesterday, looking slightly rumpled.  He doesn’t look up when I sit up in my bunk and stretch.

My stomach growls in anticipation at the smell of something sweet and inviting in the air.  I walk to the pantry in my socked feet and dig up what looks like a box of granola and dried fruit.  I quietly take a seat across from Zefa who is typing away on a round tablet on the table.  Streaks of green scroll through the black screen, too fast for my eyes to follow.  He is eating a bowl of what looks like oatmeal and dried fruit.

He swallows another spoonful of breakfast before acknowledging me, “Good morning, Fallon.  I am sorry for being so rude at the table.  I am receiving field reports right now and I have to respond to some messages.  Please excuse me.”

“Good morning.  It's fine, Zefa.  No need to worry about me.  You do what you need to do, I'm used to eating meals alone anyway.  And please, you really don't have to be all formal with me.”

I try to eat a few handfuls of the granola but it feels dry and tasteless in my mouth.  Abandoning my breakfast, I set the box back in its place in the pantry and start exploring the living area of the ship.  There are panels all along the walls with little red buttons that are almost flush with the wall.  When I press the first button, part of the what I had thought was a seamless wall slides back, revealing a hidden compartment.  It is neatly stacked with fancy electronics with far too many wires and switches for me to comprehend.