Connie’s Courage (41 page)

‘Let's get him into the kitchen and clean those cuts, Connie suggested, waiting until she had cleaned them properly and was dressing them, before asking Nora, ‘if this isn't the first time he's been attacked, why hasn't something been done about it? Have you reported it to the police?

‘It isn't as simple as that, Connie. You see all the houses around here bar mine are landlord-owned and the landlord he wants this one, too, but he doesn't want to buy it for a fair price. He wants to frighten me out of it like he's done others around here. And if you were to ask me, I'd say that's part of the reason those thugs of his keep attacking poor Davie. It's the same men he sends in if'n someone doesn't pay their special rent money.

‘Special rent money? Connie queried.

Nora gave a heavy sigh.

‘Aye, that's the extra he charges his tenants for
making sure that they don't get no bother from anyone like. Thing is though, that the only ones they re likely to get bother from are his own men, she told Connie bitterly. ‘There's no need for you to worry though. They don't bother any of the lodgers. They bring in money, and he likes to keep this street respectable so that he can show it off, if anyone comes round checking up like.

‘I have heard as how he's got dozens of filthy tenements as is let out to poor souls who can't afford anything better, whole families living in one room, and all sorts rooming in the same building with them, if you know what I mean. Women as is looking to tempt the soldiers when they come home on leave, and keep them from their families, she added darkly, obviously not willing to utter the word ‘prostitute. ‘I warned Davie not to go out at night, but he never listens. Like a child he is …

‘Well, they've knocked him about pretty badly and he's got some nasty cuts, but nothing seems to be broken.

‘Connie? Connie Pride?'

‘Josie! Connie exclaimed in pleased surprise, as she paused halfway down the stairs leading to the hospital dispensary.

Enthusiastically the two friends hugged one another.

‘When did you start working here again? Josie demanded.

About a month ago,' Connie answered her. ‘When did you come back?'

Oh, six months back now. The house seemed empty without Ted to look after. Vera suggested I got a job with her in the munitions factory but I didn't fancy it somehow, and then I heard as how the hospital was needing nurses, so I got meself up here and asked if I could come back like, even though I was married. Well, widowed now of course, and they was more than pleased to have me!

‘And you?'

Connie hesitated, unwilling to lie, but all too aware of the fact that Matron had taken her back on as Connie Smith, even if everyone who remembered her, including Mr Clegg for whom she was now working as a surgical nurse, still referred to her as Sister Pride.

The same,' she answered Josie as casually as she could. She gave a small shrug. I could have stayed in Preston with my sister and her husband, but I missed the work.'

You means you was married? Well I never! I hadn't heard. And widowed, you say?' Josie added sympathetically.

There are a lot of women lost their men to this War,' Connie responded truthfully. And at least I've got my little Lyddy …'

You've got a babby! Fancy that! I saw Vera the other day, she's carryin'.'

‘How's her Bert?' Connie asked drily. ‘The last I

heard he had claimed to be a conscientious objector so as to avoid being called up!

‘Well, there's bin a bit of trouble there. Fell out good and proper, they did. The next thing was that Vera moved out, and moved in with this soldier she'd gone and tekken up with. Aye, and this babby she's carrin is his an all, and him gone back to the War and left her with nowt but a swollen belly and a heap o' trouble on ‘er hands.

‘Bert won't have her back, and her family have turned her back on her. She's still working at the munitions factory and she's moved in with one of the girls she works with there. Seems like the pair of them was off having a good time when they should have been at home cooking their husbands suppers, and that's how Vera met up with this soldier in the first place. Now he's gorn and left her and, like I said, she's in a right old mess.

‘Still, if you ask me, it serves her right. Ted allus did say she was one as would come to a bad end, and to tell the truth, it isn't as though she hasn't got what she deserved, messing around like that. I mean what respectable woman ends up in her state, carrin and no husband! Josie demanded indignantly. ‘I don't have anything to do with her any more, she added virtuously. ‘After all, I don't want to get tarred with the same brush as her, I'm a respectable widow!

Connie's heart sank a little further with every word Josie said.

‘Anyway, what about you, Connie?' Josie pressed
sympathetically. You're a widow too. Was your husband …?'

‘I don't want to talk about it, if you don't mind, Josie,' Connie stopped her quickly.

Aye, I know how you feel. Hated talking about my Ted I did, at first.'

I hardly knew John, really,' Connie told her in a low voice. He was a soldier … and … and not from round here.'

There, Connie, don't you go upsetting yourself,' Josie sympathised, making Connie feel even more guilty. But she had Lyddy to think of, she reminded herself, as she acknowledged how right Gideon and Ellie had been to want to protect her, even if something in her balked at having to lie.

‘Do you ever hear anything of anyone else?' Connie asked her.

Anyone else. Like who?'

Well … Mavis, for instance.'

Josie's face broke into an immediate smile.

‘Oh yes. She writes to me, regular like. It was through her that I ‘eard that you'd left the hospital because she wrote and asked me if I knew where you were. Said as how she'd had some of her letters sent back to her.'

Connie bit her lip.

‘I should have written, but what with … everything.'

Aye, well, Mavis ‘ull understand. Allus was an understanding one was Mavis. So you won't have ‘eard their good news then, I suppose?'

‘I knew that Rosa was to have a baby,' Connie admitted cautiously.

‘Oh that, yes, a fine boy she's had, but Mavis and them haven't so much as seen ‘im, on account of how Rosa has gone living with some cousin or other. But that'll change once this ruddy War is over and their Arry comes back.

The stairs moved sickeningly beneath her feet, and for a moment Connie thought she might actually faint.

‘Harry? But he's dead?' she protested shakily.

‘Aye well, they thought ‘e was, but seemingly it were all a mistake and he's a prisoner of war! Harry wrote to the War Office about the mix up and they checked up on everything, and Mavis and them were allowed to send a letter to Arry … Mavis says that she'd rather he was imprisoned than still having to fight, and I can't say as I blame her!

‘And then, as if that weren't enough good luck, that old aunt of theirs went and died, and they found out that she'd left them the house and a fair bit o' money as well! Ere is that the time? Sister will have me guts for garters, if I don't get a move on, Josie announced. ‘How about the two of us meeting up for a proper chat over a cup o' tea next time we re both off. You can bring your little un, if you like. Her face softened. ‘Right fond of kiddies, I am. Pity that me and Ted never had any. She gave a small sigh.

Connie was incapable of making any kind of
rational response. Her heart was thumping and she felt sick with shock and pain.

Harry was alive. Harry wasn't dead. Harry was alive and once this War was over he would be coming home to his wife and his son, and the three of them would live happily ever after, whilst she …

Tears burned the backs of her eyes like raw acid. Thank God. Thank God, Harry would never know the extent of her shame! She couldn't bear to think of him knowing that she was not married and the mother of a child, because she knew what he would think …

Harry was alive. Pain and joy filled her in equal measure. Harry was alive, but a part of her wished that she were dead.

‘Connie, it is so lovely having you here with us, and little Lyddy too.

Ellie smiled fondly at where Lydia was sitting happily in the late August sunshine, whilst the adults enjoyed the picnic they had brought to the lakeside with them.

‘When Gideon first bought the house here I thought it was an extravagance, but I admit I do love the Lake District,' Ellie told Connie happily, before adding, ‘but what I love even more is having us all together. I am so pleased that both you and John were able to be here at the same time.

‘Well I've only got two days off, Connie reminded her tiredly.

Ellie frowned a little as she looked at her. ‘I know how much you wanted to go back to nursing, Connie, but I have to say that it doesn't seem to be doing you much good. You look so thin and you've barely smiled or laughed the whole time you've been here. Is everything all right?

Yes, of course,' Connie answered her, but she knew that she was lying.

Something had happened to her with the birth of Lydia, something she had not bargained for – a combination of a deep need to be with her child, and an equally deep weariness of damaged young bodies and death. Sometimes it seemed no matter how hard they worked, there was so little they could do.

And then of course there were her agonising, aching dreams of Harry and the unending pain of loving him.

Tell me more about your landlady and her brother,' Ellie demanded.

Connie had given Ellie a brief description of Nora and Jinx, telling her about how much they both adored and spoiled Lyddy but omitting to mention the fact that Jinx, or rather Davie, had been beaten up twice whilst she had been living with them, and that Nora was in constant fear for her brother.

Perhaps I should just give in and sell this house to Derek Walton,' she had told Connie wearily one evening, when they were sitting together drinking tea, whilst Lyddy slept peacefully in Nora's arms. In Nora, Connie had found the perfect person to care for Lyddy whilst she was at work, and Nora had refused to take so much as a penny for watching over the baby, saying that she ought to be the one paying Connie for the pleasure it gave her to have Lydia's company.

‘He's an evil man. Him and that partner of his, they both are.

‘Perhaps you
should
sell and move somewhere else, Connie had suggested more than once.

‘I've got Davie to think of. And I'm afraid that no one would sell to me once they knew about him. He doesn't mean any harm Connie, you know that, but folks just don't understand.

Now though it seemed Nora was being forced to change her mind.

‘Connie, I've been thinking, Ellie broke into her thoughts. ‘I know it will be hard for you, but why don't you leave Lyddy with us instead of taking her back to Liverpool with you? Gideon has decided that I'm to stay up here with the boys, instead of going back to Preston at the end of the month as we'd intended, because of the way this influenza is spreading. There are thousands dead of it already abroad, apparently, she told Connie anxiously.

‘We have been warned to take every precaution against it that we can, Connie admitted soberly. ‘As yet we haven't had any patients affected by it.

‘Oh, this wretched War! I wish so that it would be over! Gideon says that even in the Government now there are those who are insisting that something be done to bring it to a close, and that too many lives have already been lost. And now what with more food rationing on top of everything else.'

Connie you're back. I have missed you so much. But where is Lydia?'

‘I left her up in the Lakes with my sister,' Connie answered Nora as the other woman welcomed her in. ‘Ellie is worried about this influenza and begged me not to risk Lyddy's health by bringing her back to Liverpool, especially with me working at the hospital.'

‘Oh I shall miss her so much!' So shall I.' Connie gave her a rueful look. I miss her already and it hasn't been a full day yet since I left her.'

It had almost broken her heart to say goodbye to her baby. But this time, unlike when she first came back to Liverpool, she knew she had to leave her behind, for Lyddy's own good. Gideon had alarmed her with his grim certainty that the influenza deaths being inflicted on other countries would also be inflicted on their own. He had already put in place stringent measures to prevent it infecting his own household.

If he should be proved right, Connie knew that Lydia would be far safer with Ellie in the fresh air of the countryside than in the close confines of Liverpool. Even so, she thought constantly of her little girl who had celebrated her first birthday earlier in the month with Ellie throwing a very grand party for her. She remembered how Lyddy had sat to have her photograph taken by her Uncle John wearing the beautiful silk and lace dress her Aunt Ellie had sewn for her.

‘Oh, Connie she is such a beauty, Ellie had whispered emotionally. ‘Every time I see her she is even prettier. She is so like our mother.' Silently they had looked at one another, and then Ellie had squeezed Connie's hand reassuringly, ‘She's all Barclay, with just the right amount of Pride common sense, Connie, and nothing else!'

By the end of September, Gideon's prediction had proved alarmingly correct, and the so-called ‘Spanish' flu was sweeping the country.

‘Have you heard the latest? one of the nurses an exhausted Connie bumped into in the dining room on her way for her breakfast before she went on duty, asked her, continuing without waiting for Connie to reply, ‘a friend of mine works at the Walton and they've had twenty-five nurses go down with the flu already.'

Connie said nothing. She had already heard privately from one of the other Sisters, the even more shocking news that seven nurses and one Sister had died from the pneumonia that was accompanying the influenza. The Liverpool hospital authorities were afraid that such news would panic people and affect the morale of the whole of the city's nursing staff.