Confessions of a Heartbreaker (34 page)

"You're starting to scare me," she says breathlessly with just a hint of laughter in her voice.

"Trust me, I'm scaring myself right now as well." Yeah, I am
so
scaring myself right now. But it's okay. Because it feels good to say the words. It feels good to have her know how I feel. How I've always felt about her... even when I was running scared.

And then I smack my lips against hers, kissing the hell out of her. Kissing the hell out of the girl I love.

Yeah, that's right, I love her and I'm man enough to admit it.

After she did, of course.

Epilogue

Nine months later...

Walking through the quad, I haul my backpack onto my shoulder. My last class of the day just let out and I've got two and a half hours to kill before football practice starts. And let me tell you something- that shit makes high school practice look like a game of patty cake. It's grueling. Every single damn day.  Sometimes twice a day.

But you know what?

I freaking love it.

College is way cooler than I imagined it would be. And I pretty much assumed that it would rock.

"Hey Montgomery!"

I fist bump a teammate as we pass one another, each of us heading in a different direction. "What's up, Conners?"

He turns towards me as he starts walking backwards. I do the same as we continue carrying on our conversation oblivious to those around us who are hurrying to their next class. "I heard coach is totally pissed and plans on working our asses over today-"

Before he can even finish with his pissing and moaning, I cut in, "And we're going to love every single moment of it."

His face contorts into one of disgust as he shakes his head in disbelief. "That's sick, dude, just plain sick."

"True that."  Giving him a wave, I turn back around.  “Catch you later, Conners.”

“Not if I catch you first,” he hollers back.

Yeah, maybe I am sick but I had to seriously work my ass off to get here so there's no way in hell I'm going to blow it by slacking off now. Nope, not going to happen. Last December, when it started coming down to the wire and I was still dragging my feet about which colleges to apply to, Coach Monroe called in a few favors and got my highlight tapes looked at by some college football coaches he knew. Luckily for me they ended up being interested. I probably owe that guy my firstborn son or something like that for all the ass kicking he did when I needed it the most.

You know who else helped kick my ass into high gear?

Drum roll please...

Ms. Fisk...

Yeah, you heard me right.

That woman was as much of a lifesaver as coach was. I think those two were involved in some sort of tag team effort to help get me to college. When one would finally back the hell off, the other would totally be all up in my grill, bugging the hell out of me. The woman who I once upon a time referred to as an old bat (but it was always said lovingly... okay maybe not..) tutored me herself four times a week for the remainder of the school year just to make sure I aced every single paper, quiz, test, quest, practicum and report. When I brought back anything less than a solid A, she'd make me meet up with her on Saturday afternoons.

Do you have any idea what a total buzzkill that was?

And I don't even want to get into what we did in preparation for the ACT and SAT...

A shudder actually slides through my body because that shit's the stuff nightmares are made of. Hell, sometimes I still wake up screaming in the middle of the night trying to wrack my brain for answers to questions like-

If f, g, and l are consecutive integers such that 0 < f < g < l and the units (ones) digit of the product fl is 9, what is the units digit of g?

(A) 0

(B) 1

(C) 2

(D) 3

(E) 4

I think I just broke out in a cold sweat...

Lord knows I've said it before but it bears repeating- that woman is a total ballbuster.

But thank God for it. Like we're talking me, Parker Montgomery, on my knees worshipping at Ms. Fisk's feet because guess who got straight A's for second, third, and fourth quarter? Not to mention mind blowing scores on both the ACT and SAT?

Yeah, that's right-
this guy
.

Has your mind been totally blown?

I know mine has.

Guess I'm not just a pretty face anymore. That's right, I now bring the brains, the brawn (did I mention that I've packed on thirty pounds of pure muscle?) and the pretty face. Because come on people, I am so damn pretty.

Anyway, my dad just about fell over when he saw my grades at the end of the semester. And my mom went on and on (and then on some more) about all that untapped potential that was sitting right there beneath the surface. I think she felt somewhat vindicated for all the years she spent yammering at me about what I was actually capable of. Yep, a whole lot of blah, blah, blah... Okay, so maybe I could have lived without all that. But in the end it was worth it.

So, so worth it.

Here's another epiphany (FYI- that means
a sudden realization
- yeah, you learn something new every day here at college), Ms. Fisk isn't so bad after all. But let's just keep that on the down low, shall we?  Maybe Jordan was right after all when she said that her aunt really does care about her students.

Because without her, I wouldn't be here.

At college.

Playing the sport I love.

Pretty much living the dream.

"Hey Parker," giggles some random chick as she sidles up beside me. I think she might be from one of my classes but I'm not sure.

Smiling, I give her a slight nod. "Hey, what's up?"
Girl I don't know
...

Hopefully that sentiment doesn't come across on my face. And no, my smile isn't what I fondly refer to as my
panty dropper smile
.  That oldie but goodie has been, for all intents and purposes, retired from public use. But worry not, for it shall live on in infamy in both our hearts and our minds. It was a good smile... Always worked so well on the ladies.

The random girl at my side giggles again knocking me out of my silent reverie. Man I seriously hate when that happens. Sometimes a dude just wants to be alone with his innermost thoughts. Even if they are about a panty dropping smile...

My eyes slide to hers as I wonder, not for the first time I might add, why girls always seem to giggle like that. Are they under the mistaken impression that it's sexy or cute? Because it's actually kind of annoying.

"Not much." Then she nips rather coyly at her bottom lip before asking, "So, are you going to the Delta Sig party Friday night?"

My gaze latches firmly onto hers and, very much like an obedient dog, stays put. I’d like to give myself a little pat on the back for not allowing my eyes to stray downward because this girl just pulled out the big guns. It's the-
I'm-going-to-bite-my-lower-lip-all-the-while-giving-you-a-sexy-little-smile
. Yeah, I'm on to you random girl and I'm definitely not falling for any of your sly flirty trickery.

And trust me when I say that I can tell from the single cursory glance I took that this girl is bouncing in all the right places- if you know what I mean but there's no way in hell my eyes are detouring south again for another look.

Nope, not gonna do it.

There's absolutely no checking out going on here folks.

I shrug my shoulders wanting to cut this chick loose. I'm not interested in the least.  "Not sure what my plans are yet."

"Well, a bunch of us from the third floor are going to be there." She smiles again only this time it's as full blown as it can get. I'm almost blinded by her whiter than white teeth. One of my brows slides slowly upwards. Yeah, that's a whole lot of teeth she's got going on in there... Makes me squirm just a bit thinking about the kind of damage teeth like that could do on a guy.

Although, it certainly won't be this guy.

That's for damn sure.

"Yeah, well, we'll see. Alright, I gotta get to the library and study."

No, seriously, I'm not just blowing smoke up this girl's ass, I'm actually on my way to the library to study.

And with those parting words, I carefully extract myself from the situation before making a beeline for the library. A moment later I'm pulling open the glass door before heading inside the massive brick building. Believe it or not, I actually spend quite a bit of time here. And that's in addition to the mandatory two hour study halls that we do twice a week as a team.

Yep, this is the newly improved Parker 2.0. All the bugs and glitches have finally been worked out.

I study hard for my classes.

I work my ass off in practice.

And I'm in love with the most perfect girl in the world.

Yep, Parker 2.0 is here to stay, my friends. So embrace it. I have.

Jogging up the stairs, I catch myself just as I start to hum.

Have I mentioned just how freaking good life is right now?

And I pretty much owe it all to the girl who changed my life. Or maybe I should say that I owe it to the girl who made me
want
to change my life.  To be a better man.  To be more than just some stupid punk kid constantly chasing after a piece of ass.  I actually wanted to be worthy of a girl like her.

And you know what?  I think I am.

Winding my way through the second floor stacks, I find a little table nestled in the back of a corner. It might be seriously unmanly to admit that my heart actually skips a beat when I catch my first glimpse of her, but I don't give a rat's ass. I really don’t.  And yeah, so maybe I’m whipped. So what?

I'd be willing to get whipped by that girl any day of the week.  Yeah… you know it…

I smile- and you bet your damn ass it's the panty dropper smile. It's reserved solely for her now. And I'll give her that smile all day long.

Throwing my backpack onto the small wooden table between us, I slide onto the chair situated directly across from her before leaning forward until she's able to meet me half way. My lips slide slowly, leisurely across hers. And then I'm all but lost in the taste and feel of her. I'm not exactly sure how many heartbeats slip past. It could be thirty or three hundred. All I know is that I'll probably never get enough of her.

As she slowly pulls away from me, the edges of her incredibly kissable lips bow upwards into a sexy little smile. It's seriously enough to make me want to lean in and go for round two right here in the middle of the library. And yeah, I am schwinging something fierce over here.

Because you know what? Some things never change...

"So how did your psych exam go?"

A smile curves my lips heavenward because I'm feeling pretty damn smug right about now. "I think I aced it." I give her a little wink as I pull my thick tome of a biology book out of my bag. "And I owe it all to my tutor."

Eyes narrowing, she tilts her head to the side. Her long blond hair has been pulled up into a messy looking bun on the top of her head. Have I mentioned just how sexy this girl is? She totally gets me going. I'm sure I don't need to go through the whole downstairs, below the belt thing do I? Yeah, I didn't think so...

"Oh, is that right? Because I don't recall us actually studying for psychology last night."

My smile turns into more of a sly grin as my eyes grow hot. My mind tumbles back to last night and how much fun that was. "Oh, trust me, what we did helped out tremendously. I think we're gonna have to do some more of that kind of studying... you know, at least once a day..."

Her gaze skitters away as her cheeks fill with heat. But still... there's that sexy little smile curving her lips upwards.

Damn but she's adorable. Especially when she's all flushed and embarrassed.

As I stare, it's like I'm suddenly being hit over the head with a two by four because I still can't help but wonder, probably for the hundredth time now, how in the hell I ended up with someone like her.

Jordan is the most perfect girl in the whole freaking world and for some strange reason, she's in love with me just as much as I am with her. And trust me when I say that I am head over heels in love with her.

And to think that we almost didn't happen. That I was too damn busy running scared... Acting like a major wussy along with a few other choice names I shan't be mentioning. But don't worry because I know exactly what kind of a lucky bastard I am to have her in my life. I'm reminded of it every single time I gaze into her gorgeous goldish green cat-like eyes and find myself drowning within them.

After she moved away last November, we did everything we could to stay together. We Skyped, FaceTimed, and Snapchatted every single moment of the day. We texted. Then we kicked it old school and actually talked on the phone. She spent vacations with her aunt just so we could be together.