Colonist's Wife (8 page)

“Only the four months awaiting trial. My parents had money, hired the best lawyers. They didn’t want the family name stained.” His hands slipped away and hers did with them, falling back to her sides. Everything around her felt cold and quiet. Adam didn’t look at her. “They cut off all contact with me afterward. I was disavowed. I had nothing. That was when I joined the army. The war was just getting going, so they were desperate for people. And I’d already proven I was willing to pull the trigger, so I went right to the top of the class.”

She swallowed hard. “That’s everything?”

“Yes. I suppose someone should have warned you.”

“Adam, you were just a kid…”

“I was seventeen.”

“Which is still a kid.”

“It’s not something you can excuse, Louise. Someone died.” He took a step past her and she stopped him, moving into his path and weaving her arms around his neck. Trying to reach him however she could. He turned his face away and his hands rose to disengage her. “Don’t…”

“
You
don’t,” she growled, stomping her foot on the hard floor. Juvenile but effective.

Wary eyes met hers. “Louise…”

“I need to hold you and you need me to, so just don’t.”

He rubbed his hands over her arms, then stopped, his fingers trying halfheartedly to pluck her from him. “Gideon was a good man. You deserve better. Maybe if we talk to the coordinator…”

“Gideon is dead. You are my husband.
You
,” she said, a strange sort of panic rising inside her, mixing with the anger. The thought of losing him unraveled her. Her hands balled into fists, anchored around his neck. “You think I’m some toy to be handed around? Fuck you.”

With a startled look, he lifted his chin and gazed down at her. “You’re really mad.”

“You’re talking divorce and you’re insulting me. Of course I’m mad.”

The skin between his brows ridged and she resisted the temptation to use it as a target, to slap the palm of her hand right there. Knock some sense into him. She wasn’t normally a violent person, but he brought out all sorts of complicated in her.

“I’m trying to do the right thing by you,” he said.

“What bullshit. I don’t get to walk away from you, so what gives you the right?”

“Louise…”

“No. Really.”

The man stopped and stared. “I hadn’t thought of it that way.”

“Yes, well—it’s hypocritical.”

“Ah.” His chest heaved against hers and his hands settled on her back, smoothing down her robe. “All right.”

She said nothing. Relief weakened her. If he hadn’t been there to prop her up she might have hit the floor.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“Okay.”

Her husband nodded slowly, eyes fixed on her.

“You were young and stupid—you made a mistake,” she said. “But Adam, I don’t want anyone else either.”

“No?”

“No.”

Adam lowered his forehead to hers, eyes sealing shut. He stayed quiet for a long time, standing there, holding her tight. It felt like a safe space in his arms, in their home. “I think I needed to hear you say that.”

She sighed and pressed her face to his. “Idiot.”

“That, not so much.” He smiled.

It was a beautiful thing, Adam Elliot’s smile. Louise licked her lips and drew herself up tall. Doing the right thing sucked. “And, if you need to go back to Earth for your father’s funeral, I understand.”

“I don’t.”

“Adam, you’re only going to get one chance at this. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret,” she said. “I know family is complicated, but it seems as if your mother is reaching out to you.”

He made a noise of disapproval low in his throat. “Do we really have to keep talking about this? I thought we needed to get to work in the garden.”

“Fine. I’m only saying—”

“Princess.”

She shut her mouth with an audible snap and he pressed a light kiss to it.

“Thank you,” he said.

Louise let Adam lead her to the garden with her hand tight in his. It gave her the warm fuzzies, him wanting the connection. Holding hands was such a simple, sweet thing.

He took her a back way, moving at his usual impossible pace. Down a small, silent corridor of rough stone. Down six flights of stairs. On and on they went. Her shirt was clinging to her by the time they reached the bottom, despite the frosty temperature in the passageways.

“Are you trying to avoid someone?” she enquired of her husband’s back.

“No.”

“Because this feels a little out of the way. Taking the lift wouldn’t have been more direct, perhaps?”

“No.”

“Sure you’re not trying to avoid the chief, maybe?”

“No.”

“Just wondering.”

Adam’s com sounded and he drew it from his back pocket without slowing the pace. “We’ve got a meeting with the marriage coordinator tomorrow.”

“Are you going to show this time?”

He stopped so fast she stumbled straight into him. Strong hands caught her elbows, steadying her. Dark stubble lined his jaw because he hadn’t bothered to shave. Her husband did rugged awfully well. Made her want to swoon, just a little. “I’m sorry about that.”

“Let me guess—that was before.”

“It was.” Blue eyes narrowed but he couldn’t quite keep the start of a smile off his face. A smile was a victory on what had to be an awful day for him, no matter what he said. “You’re a bit of a smartass, princess.”

“I’m your worshipful wife,” she corrected.

“Ah. That would be it.”

“Best five days of your life, since I arrived.”

“True.”

“So I think you should turn up this time and tell the nice lady as much.”

He nodded gravely. “I will. We’ll go together.” Adam dipped his head and kissed the tip of her nose, the jut of her chin. His eyes radiated warmth, affection. “Best five days of my life.”

And her heart kind of tipped and fell for him. Which terrified her, but there was absolutely nothing she could do to stop it.

“Adam.”

“Mmm?”

She couldn’t afford this, the feeling of being opened wide, everything exposed. Falling for this man could definitely expose her and her secrets. It could endanger them both. The district attorney had been insistent. She could tell no one. It would only put them in jeopardy. What happened to Con might have been a mess of his own making, but it wasn’t happening to Adam. He wouldn’t get dragged into it. She wouldn’t allow it. Now more than ever, she had to keep her shit together. There was still a price on her head for testifying at Con’s murderer’s trial. People still wanted her dead, if they could find her. A guard had been tortured to death not long before she’d shipped out because someone in the DA’s office had spoken out of turn. If the guard had known…

Louise stared at him with her mouth gaping but nothing coming out. Her husband.

An abyss yawned wide inside her and she stood on the edge, alone and uncertain. Her head was cluttered with all the things she couldn’t tell him. All the truths she couldn’t speak because he’d become precious to her. She couldn’t tell him the truth. Couldn’t risk it.

“You okay?” he asked.

Determinedly, she pushed back all the emotions pounding inside her. It took a long time for them to settle and recede. “Yeah.”

Adam stared at her long and hard. “Shall we go to your garden and get this done?”

“Sure. Let’s do that.”

Adam watched his wife as she watched Esther’s version of the Northern Lights do their thing. Dazzling streaks of green and blue and silver played across the sky overhead. Louise’s face was upturned, eyes wide with wonder. Adam sat entranced by her. He found her a million times more interesting than the show nature was staging outside. She sat in the passenger seat beside him, the low glow of the transport panel lighting her face.

Glacial winds howled and buffeted the sturdy scout-class transport they’d borrowed, but otherwise the night was fine. Or fine for Esther.

“Tell me about your family,” he said.

Her eyes darted to him. “My family?”

“Mmm.”

“They died a while back. I was an only child. Not much to tell.”

“You really were a princess. I bet they spoilt you rotten.”

She gave him a distracted smile.

“Come and sit on my lap,” he said, grabbing her hand and tugging her over his way. The perfect place for her to be for a nice heavy petting session.

“There’s no room…”

“Sure there is.” Another tug on her hand and she rose, giving him a dubious glance. He shuffled back in his seat so she could squeeze between him and the console, sitting sideways on his lap. “See. Now you can put your head on my shoulder and watch the lights. Won’t hurt your neck so much.”

“My neck was fine,” she said, but did indeed nestle into his hold and lay her head on his shoulder. The warmth of her felt wonderful and the scent of her filled him with a sense of rightness. His woman. His wife. No place he would rather be.

“Thank you,” he said, his fingers finding and stroking over the curve of her hip under her sturdy work pants.

There hadn’t been time to change after completing all the jobs she’d set for them in the garden. She’d restricted his activities to fetching and lifting heavy objects after he had inadvertently crushed the fifth baby-whatever seedling requiring a pot. Everyone down there adored his wife—some of the botanical boffins a bit too much. A menacing look or two had set them straight.

“What work did you do before?” Adam inched a finger beneath his wife’s baggy jumper. One of these days he would buy her some clothes that actually fit. His wife had a beautiful body. Hiding it was stupid.

“I worked in a dress shop,” she said. “I told you already.”

“Ah. That’s right.”

“What about you? What did you do in the army?”

“Just grunt stuff, then later the piloting. Nothing interesting.” Because he’d learned a long time ago not to go into the details of special operations—the less said the better. Some of the things they’d done in the name of intelligence-gathering should stay buried for all eternity. Yes, they’d saved lives, but they’d taken them too. For the greater good or whatever—didn’t matter. They had been dark deeds.

“Mmm.” Her eyes remained fixed on the heavens. No reaction from her to the finger creeping beneath her clothing. He let the rest of his hand follow, sliding up her rib cage, his touch light.

“Adam.” She squirmed suddenly, rubbing her rear against his groin in a pleasant fashion. “Your hand’s cold.”

“Sorry.” And he was. He should have thought to warm it up first. But she hadn’t asked him to remove it, so he didn’t. “What kind of dress shop?”

“A women’s one.” She smiled.

“Cute.” Fingertips found the swell of a breast and the soft cotton of her bra. “What did your parents do?”

“Look, the colors are changing again.” She pointed to the sky and he took the opportunity to tuck a finger into the top of the cup of her bra and drag it down. His knuckle drifted over the soft peak of her nipple and it immediately tightened. “You’re being very distracting, Adam.”

“Am I?”

“Yes. Wow, look—now there’s some yellow coming into it. It’s spectacular. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Very nice.”

“You’re not even looking.”

“I’ve seen it before.” Adam plumped her delicate breast in his hand. Just the feel of her made him wild. A ravishing was not out of the question. “You were going to tell me about your parents.”

“Sure. Then we should talk about your mother’s communiqué.”

He ignored her comment and lightly drew the pad of his thumb back and forth across her nipple, coaxing it to life. It didn’t take much. Her breath hitched when he gave it a light pinch and her delightful rear wriggled in his lap again. “What did your parents do, princess?”

“My father was a programmer and my mother stayed home. Are there security cameras in this transport?”

“Yes, they’re on all the transports. But we’re not being monitored. I mean, most likely we’re not.”

She grabbed his arm, body stiffening. “Adam.”

“Relax—they can’t see a thing.” He rolled her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, slowly increasing the pressure, tugging lightly until she gave a breathy moan. The one noise that ensured there would be no blood left for his brain at all. “I promise you, they have no idea how sensitive your gorgeous tits are. Nor are they aware of how much you like having them played with.”

Louise’s back arched against his hold, her teeth pinching her lip. “Stop it. What if someone is listening?”

“Well, yes. That could be embarrassing.” His cock was a steel pike in his jeans and she kept making those tight little movements, hips jerking. “Better tell me more about your life before I get carried away and start talking about how luscious the cheeks of your—”

“Adam,” she panted. “I thought you wanted to see the lights.”

“Yeah, they’re real nice. Wonder if I could make you come just by playing with your nipples? What do you think, princess?”

His wife gave a sexy growl, making the heat in his balls excruciating. No other woman would do. Only this one drove him nuts each and every time. “What do you want to know?”

“No siblings, hmm?”

“No. Let me up.” She made a half-assed attempt at rising. “Now, Adam.”

“No. You don’t want to get up. Tell me about your past boyfriends.” He slid the cup of her bra down over her neglected left breast, fingers paying the warm, succulent mound due homage. Sweet, small sounds escaped Louise’s lips and she buried her face in his neck, trying to hide. Her legs were clamped tight, knees rubbing restlessly together. “How wet are you, princess?”

“A couple of boyfriends. No one as difficult as you.”

“Be nice. Would you like me to put my hand down your pants yet?”

“Someone could see,” she hissed.

“Do you really care?”

“Adam…”

“Be honest. You know you don’t.”

His pretty wife scowled. “Why must you torture me?”

“If it didn’t get you so hot, I swear I wouldn’t do it. I’m a reasonable man,” he said, thoroughly enjoying himself. In fact, he couldn’t remember when he’d had more fun. Marriage was a wonderful institution—the very best. “What did you say your father did again?”