Cockpit: A Second Chance Romance (45 page)

I tore the top of her dress off her shoulders.
 
It ripped, making an ugly tearing sound. I groaned as her breasts sprang free. I feasted on them all the while fingering her gently. Making sure she was ready.

I grunted as my fingers became slippery.

"I can't wait."

I pulled my cock free of my pants and guided it home.
She
was home to me now. I wanted to visit it one last time before she told me to go to hell.

I closed my eyes as her body welcomed me in, holding me snugly. This feeling. This warmth and silky smooth flesh. This was something I wanted to remember for the rest of my life.

Slowly, I started to fuck her, standing up and fully clothed in the middle of the hotel room. Her eyes were on mine as we rocked in place.
 

I grunted, using my hands to lift and lower her slender body onto my shaft. It felt so good. I knew I wasn't going to last long. Even as drunk as I was.

"Nico..."

"I'm going to cum. I'm sorry. It feels too good."

But she was coming too. It sent me over the edge, making me pump up and into her faster and faster. I had wanted to make it count. To put off the inevitable. But my body took over.

"Unfffff..."

I held her firmly against me as my cock jetted thick ropes of cum all the way inside her. It was stupid, I know. But I still couldn't help myself. The urge to impregnate her was pure animal instinct. And it was so intense that it took over.
 

Every time.

I was still inside her when I finally said the words.

"I do this. This is what I do. For money."

Her eyes were still glazed with passion when she blinked at me. Her arms still around my neck. My cock still deep within her.

"What?"

"I have sex with wealthy women for money. I'm an escort."

I pulled out of her, lowering her skirt into place. I tried to pull her dress up but I had torn it too badly. I frowned, trying to make it stay up. Trying to cover her.

"I was an escort anyway. I'm done with it now."

"I don't understand."

I was afraid to look at her, so I looked at the floor. I tucked my cock back into my pants and walked back to the bar for another drink. I could feel her eyes on my back. I could sense her confusion. I closed my eyes.

It was time to face the music.

I picked up my phones. I held one up.

"Personal."

Then I held up the other one.

"Professional."

I didn't tell her which category she fell under. I wasn't sure I had the courage to do that yet. Or ever.

I swallowed my drink and poured another.

"Do you want one?"

She didn't say anything. She just stared at me.

"You could be anything. Why?"

I laughed bitterly.

"It started by accident. I was just out of high school. Thinking about trying to get into a culinary program. It was so expensive though, and we didn't have enough to make ends meet at home."

She waited, not judging me. Letting me talk.

"I was in a bar with some friends. I bussed tables there sometimes. I met a woman- older- wealthy. She picked me up. I went home with her to her house in Beverly Hills. I'd never seen anything like that. Known people lived that way."

I stared at Rosie's beautiful face.

"We were poor Rosie. We were on food stamps. And even that wasn't enough."

I could see sympathy in her eyes, not judgment. I was painting it wrong. I had to make her understand. To make her see me for what I really was.

"She taught me things. She was good to me, in a way. And when she dropped me off the next day, she handed me an envelope."

I shrugged.

"After that it became a regular thing. She told one of her friends about me. It just happened."

I wasn't sure if I should laugh or cry. Rosie still didn't get it. She didn't understand that this was about
her.

"I wasn't hurting anyone. Not until now."

I stared at her, hoping she would see.

"I never wanted to hurt you Rosie."

She nodded.

"I believe you."

She took a deep breath.

"I don't care what you did. As long as you aren't doing it anymore."

My stomach flip flopped as I finally looked at her in the eyes. She was willing to give me a second chance. She was willing to forgive me.

And I had to squash it. I forced myself to look at her when I told her. When I destroyed her love for me.

"Rosie... that's just the thing. I was hired to be here. With you."

Her mouth dropped open. Her eyes were wide.

"What? You mean tonight?"

I shook my head slowly. This was it. There was no turning back now. But I couldn't lie.

"I came to London to seduce you."

She shook her head wildly, backing away from me.

"No, you're Rebecca's friend. You know the same people as I do."

I handed her a drink and held mine up in a mock toast.

"She's the one who hired me."

I tossed my drink back, my eyes on Rosie. She looked so baffled. Of course she was. She didn't have a mean bone in her body. How could she understand something so hateful?

"Why would she do something like that? I don't understand."

I shook my head.

"I don't either. At first I thought it was just an expensive practical joke. But now I think it's something else. Something darker."

I grabbed her shoulders.

"Don't let her use me to hurt you Rosie. And don't trust her. Promise me."

Her gorgeous blue eyes shone with unshed tears.

"Okay Nick. I won't."

I smiled at her sadly. I knew I had lost her. But she didn't hate me. Not yet anyway. And at least her cousin wouldn't win. I went to the phone and called the front desk.

"There's a limo downstairs waiting to take you home. I'll take you out through the back. Just one last thing- please promise me you will tell me if you need me. If anything happens in the next few weeks that I should know."

She looked confused but she nodded. I would never forgive myself if I made her pregnant. But at the same time, a small part of me hoped that I had. That we had done something that would last together.

That maybe, somehow, she'd let me see her again.

She didn't say a word as I led her back down through the service entrance. I tossed my sport coat over her shoulders and head, covering her face and torn dress. I put her into the back of the car. I was about to shut the door when she stopped me.

"Just tell me one thing Nico."

I turned back, looking one last time at her beautiful face. She inhaled deeply, as if she was afraid to ask me. But she was too brave to hide. She lifted her chin and stared me right in the face.

"Was it all an act?"

I smiled at her sadly.

"No Rosie. None of it was."

Rosalie

Rain was hitting the roof of the limo at a steady pace as we drove out of London and into the countryside. I felt raw, jagged. I was sore between my legs. But it was my heart that felt strange.

Almost like it had been emptied and filled. Then emptied again.

I didn't know what to think.

I wanted to believe that Nicholas had meant what he said. He hadn't been acting when he was with me, even if he had been hired to come here. I tried to hold onto that one tiny grain of hope in this horrible, confusing mess. But Rebecca's actions were so cruel, so baffling that it was hard to think about anything else.

Why?

Why would my own flesh and blood do something like that to me?

I wrapped my arms around myself as the tears finally started to fall. Once they started though, I couldn't stop. It felt like they would never stop.

Nico.

Rebecca.

My own stupidity.

Why would I think that a man like Nico would be interested in me? Would want me? Pursue me?

Love me?

He had said he meant it. But why should I believe him? Especially when I was a shy, awkward bookworm and he was... him.

Gorgeous. Brilliant. Exceptionally appealing. Sexually advanced.

And the things he'd done to me... how he'd done them. Without ever once mentioning using birth control. I'd assumed he knew what he was doing.

Oh God. He had. He had said something at the end there... about calling if there was something he should know...

Realization hit me like a wall of icy cold water.

He had deliberately tried to get me pregnant.

Was it possible? Would someone really be so cruel?

I closed my eyes, leaning back against the seat. No. Nicholas wouldn't do that. He probably assumed I was on the pill. Just as I had assumed he had taken care of it.

I'd been beyond stupid.

I wiped my tears away. If I was pregnant I would deal with it. I would handle whatever came.

I could do it.

I had to.

By the time the limo pulled up to my parents estate I was calm, with no trace of tears. I went up to my room and packed a small bag. Then I climbed into bed full dressed and waited for dawn to lighten the sky.

Chapter Seventeen

Nicholas

I decided to fly coach, even though I could afford first class. I didn't deserve luxury. I didn't deserve anything.

I'd been so close to giving every penny back to Rebecca. But then I'd had a better idea. My last good thing. My last connection to Rosie.

I'd given the entire twenty thousand dollars to the bees.

Part of me hoped I could tell her about it someday. Even though I knew that wasn't in her best interest. I had turned my phone off the moment she left the hotel room. It's not that I didn't want to hear from Rosie. I just didn't want to hear another word from her cousin Rebecca.

Also known as 'the bitch who ruined my life.'

Rosie was the one who had saved it.

I wasn't going to squander the gift she had given me. I was going to be the man she saw in me. I had to be.

As soon as I stopped drinking.

The stewardess had already brought me several tiny bottles of booze. Luckily my seat mate didn't want to talk to me. She was too busy knitting. Just a tiny little old lady who barely filled her seat.

I was probably scary as hell to someone like her. Dark, brooding, drunk, seething with self-loathing and anger. I felt like there was a dark cloud hanging over my head. And it was ready to erupt in an epic thunderstorm.

I closed my eyes, calling up a memory of Rosie. She was walking in front of me laughing. It was chilly but she'd insisted on taking off her shoes and dipping her toes in the ocean.

And then she'd insisted on splashing me.

I had pretended to be angry, but it was just an excuse to tackle her. We'd wrestled on the sand, laughing like children. Until we stopped laughing. I'd been on top of her, feeling like I held the most precious thing in the world in my hands.

She hadn't been coy or made a joke to lessen the moment. She'd just stared back at me, as if she thought I was the most special person she'd ever met.

She
had
thought it too.

But she had been wrong.

So very, very wrong.

"Whatever it is, it will get better."

I opened my eyes to see that the woman sitting next to me had laid her hand on my arm. Her hand was delicate, covered with wrinkles and age spots. But it was warm. She was looking at me with compassion, not fear.

Maybe I wasn't the big bad wolf that I thought I was after all.

I laughed but there was no humor in it.

"I doubt that."

"I see. You must have women problems. There's no way out of that."

She patted my arm again.

"You're pretty much screwed."

I looked at her, laughing for the first time in days.

"You're very smart."

She picked up her knitting and winked at me.

"I know."

Rosalie

I stared out the window of the train as it headed for the Chunnel. I'd bought my ticket feeling like another person. A person who went where she pleased. Made her own decisions. A person who was utterly alone.

I
was
another person.

Rain was streaming across the window as I closed my eyes, remembering the terrible scene as I tried to leave the house that morning.

"We refuse to allow you to see that man again!"

"I don't care what you think you can and cannot refuse. I'm leaving!"

"With what money? Your trust? It's sadly depleted, my dear."

"You fool- we needed you to make a good marriage. Not everything is about you!"

"What are you talking about?"

"All of this- this is mortgaged to it's rafters! Don't you care about your family?"

"Perhaps I would. If my family cared about me."

I'd been shocked as my Grandmother had walked into the room, tossing a gossip magazine onto the table. There was a picture of me, wrapped in Nick's arms on the beach. I was staring up at him adoringly. Which only made the caption splashed over the cover worse.

The caption read "Barefoot Duchess and the American Gigalo."

I started laughing then. And I hadn't stopped as I picked up my bag and walked out the front door. I hadn't looked back.

Now here I was, shamed, alone and penniless. Or nearly. I had enough money to get me far from home. I had my computer. I had some clothes. And I had my wits.

I'd never felt freer.

Even despite his deception, I knew I had Nick to thank for this feeling. Of course, the ultimate betrayal was that he'd left me alone. Even knowing I might be carrying his child.

It didn't matter though. I had to find a job and quickly. I fired up my laptop and started looking. The sky was the limit now. Or the Earth was the limit.

I wanted to work with growing things. Join a communal farm. Or work with animals.

I just needed to find a place that provided room and board... or a way to make enough money to get by. I didn't need much to live on. I wanted to experience life, not go from one cushy cage to another, trapped in some nine to five job. I was going to do this my way. Wait tables if I had to. Babysit. Walk dogs.

Whatever it took.