Choices will Destroy (An FBI Romance Thriller Book 14) (52 page)

When he tore his mouth from hers, he was wild. “You want to play, Livy?” he whispered, letting his mouth move across her throat.

“Gabriel.”

He moved them to his couch. Sitting, he pulled her to the floor between his knees. “Get me off. Now!”

She was shocked.

“What’s wrong, Olivia? You’re the only one who can initiate sex in
MY
office? You wanted to play this game, and now you’ll finish it.”

He didn't give her a chance to speak. Instead, he pulled her mouth to his erection and forced her head into place.

Setting her free, he enjoyed the way she devoured him. “Oh, Olivia, I love you so much.”

He buried his hands in her hair, finding just the right tempo. He was close, and he couldn’t wait to explode.

She ran her teeth up his erection, and he couldn’t hold back. Instead, he closed his eyes and let the wave of pleasure pull him under.

He came, and Livy didn't stop.

She was overheated, hoping they’d have more moments like this. Before this last week, she’d never do something so out of character. She’d never show up at the Hoover building, get on her knees, and pleasure her husband at work.

Never
.

Now she saw how it drove him wild.

This wasn’t over.

She’d be back for more.

When she set him free, he started laughing. Opening his eyes, they were filled with love and humor. “You’re lucky I’m the boss. The FBI frowns upon this kind of thing in the office.”

“Well, then maybe my husband will have to spank me later.”

Gabe choked on his own saliva. “What has gotten into you?” he asked, praying it would never stop. He liked this side of her. The unpredictability was back.

It was sexy.

Livy stood and fixed her hair. “You will be later, and hopefully repeatedly.”

With that, she headed toward the door, leaving her husband staring. Outside, she stopped at his secretary’s desk and pulled an Elizabeth Blackhawk.

Her friend was wearing off on her.

“Paulina, he needs a minute before you bring him lunch. In fact, I’m not sure if he’s going to be hungry. He just had dessert.”

Livy walked away, leaving the husband-poaching woman staring in her wake.

Oh, she was glad she was coming back to work. She didn't like what was going on, and as Gabe’s wife, she was going to stop it.

Only, now, she had the nerve to do it.

She had backup.

Her best friend was going to have her back once more.

 
         
* * *
  B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x   * * *

Dean Quinlan’s

Home

They searched the place as Zane and Merry finished up with the body. One thing was for sure.

Dean Quinlan’s home was a hot mess.

It looked like the man didn't have a clue on how to clean anything.

It was a biohazard in the making.

Callen found a glass with enough mold to make penicillin for a whole third world country. He didn't have cleanliness OCD, but this filth was freaking him out.

“What did we find?” Elizabeth asked, digging through the drawer.

“Drugs,” Ethan said, lifting a bag. “I also have some needles, so don’t blindly reach into dark spaces,” Ethan warned. “Be careful.”

“How he didn't give me HIV as a child is a miracle,” Callen muttered. “Someone above was watching out for me.”

Elizabeth didn't respond because she wanted to cry. She couldn’t help it. The whole thing upset her. When Callen made light of it, her heart twisted into a knot in her chest. She knew it was a coping mechanism, but it didn't work for her. She kept seeing that wounded little boy, and she wanted to protect him.

It was the mother in her.

Only, he’d told her to stop. He wanted to let it go, and she had to let him take control of his life.

She kept digging.

In the bottom of one drawer, she found a baggie. In it, she found some Polaroids. They were old.

Like thirty years or more.

They were stained with age, and she couldn’t help but be curious. Pulling them out, she realized what they were.

They were porn.

Child porn
.

In the vile photos was Callen as a child as the dead man violated him. It appeared that his mother had taken them for her then boyfriend.

She wanted to puke.

In that moment, she needed to throw up. There was no way around it.

Elizabeth had no choice. She had to get out of there, and fast. The walls were closing in on her, and she was going to toss her cookies on a crime scene.

That hadn’t happened in years.

Shoving the photos into her pocket, she headed toward the door.

“Elizabeth!” Ethan called.

“I need air.”

Callen went to follow, but he’d already dove onto Elizabeth to save her. Ethan knew he was up to bat.

Outside, he found her on her knees in the snow, vomiting up everything in her stomach.

Okay, this wasn’t right.

Elizabeth had a stomach like a steel ship. It was impenetrable. 

“Baby, what’s wrong?” he asked, crouching beside her to hold her hair back. He touched her forehead to see if she possibly picked up a bug.

“Ethan,” she whispered, reaching into her pocket. She pulled out what she found and handed it to her husband.

He was confused.

“It’s Callen. His mother took pictures of him when Dean was raping him.”

The words rattled him.

No, they sickened him.

Truth be told, Ethan wasn’t sure if he could look at them, but he forced himself to do it. For his brother, he would endure it.

Sliding them out, he saw his brother being used and abused. In the faded photos, the tears were clearly there in the familiar brown eyes. There were demons hiding there too, and suddenly, he wanted to hurt the dead man inside.

“I wish I killed him. I wish to God that I was the one who did this to him. Had I known about these, I would have.”

Elizabeth stood, not sure if she could do this. “He was just a child. He was so afraid. I don’t understand how Charlene could let that happen and participate in it. Drugs or not—how did she let that animal rape her baby?”

She sobbed, unable to unsee what was in the pictures. It went against everything in her.

Ethan held her. Together they mourned what had happened to Callen. Yes, he told them, but to see it?

It was horrible.

Just then, the door opened, and Callen stepped out.

“What’s going on?” he asked, staring back and forth at the two people he loved. They looked like hell. Elizabeth had tears down her cheeks, and that worried him.

“Angel?”

Ethan glanced over. In that moment, they had two choices. It was either lie to him or tell Callen the truth.

This was a slippery slope.

Callen didn't understand. As he glanced down, he saw the vomit in the snow. Immediately, the father-to-be in him panicked.

“Are you and the baby okay?” he asked, placing his hand on her stomach. “Do you need a hospital? Are you sick?”

She shook her head.

Elizabeth was far from okay, and she’d never forget what she’d seen in those photographs. In their job, they saw a lot of horrible things, but this hit home.

“Someone tell me what’s going on.”

Ethan knew he’d want to know.

The choice was made.

In the end, he’d own his decision to be honest with their partner.

“Callen, Elizabeth found something. We don’t know what to do with it.”

“What did you find?”

Ethan didn't hand them to him. He wanted save his baby brother the pain. He prayed that Callen would take his word and let it go. “Dean had pictures. They’re of you.”

Callen stared at him.

“What? He was stalking me?”

Ethan shook his head. “No, Callen, they are from when you were a child—while he was abusing you. It looks like your mother took them.”

The silence sat between them.

Callen was forced to go back there in his memories. It didn't take long. He recalled them as if they were yesterday.

He remembered the camera.

The sadistic laughter.

The taunting.

He recalled it all.

Callen held out his hand. “I want to see them. I need to see them.”

Elizabeth wanted to weep.

She wanted to stop him. In that moment, she wanted to wrap around him and protect the man she loved. Nothing good would come of this. She feared what it would do to the man she loved.

He waited, holding out his hand. “Give them to me, Ethan. Now!”

His brother did it.

Callen pulled them out of the plastic and flipped through them. Ethan and Elizabeth watched him. Only, there wasn’t any inkling of emotion on his face.

It was blank.

His eyes showed nothing.

Glancing up, he stared at them. “I’m sorry you found these, and that they hurt you.” With that, he started toward the Denali.

Elizabeth thought he was going to run. She really believed he was leaving. As she went to chase after him, Ethan placed his hand on her arm to stop her.

This had to be his choice. They couldn’t take that from him—not after discovering those pictures.

Together, their lives hung in the balance.

Ethan had been right to let Callen choose. Instead of making a break for it, he went to the back of the vehicle and pulled out a kit. He grabbed the bottle of alcohol solution Merry used on the crime scenes and headed back toward his family.

Digging a small hole in the snow, he placed the pictures of his rape there. Then he doused them with the liquid. The pictures of the scared little boy morphed and twisted as the alcohol ate away at them.

It wasn’t enough.

He needed to watch them go up in smoke.

Callen needed to make them disappear forever. They hurt his family, and he needed them to be gone.

Pulling out his lighter, the one that his brother had given him so many years ago in their youth, it seemed only right. He was doing this for his family.

Flicking it on, he lit the edge of one of the photographs. It erupted in flames with a loud
‘WHOOSH’
.

It burned, giving off a horrible smell.

As they stood there, he said nothing. He didn't want to go there ever again. He’d given Dean Quinlan, and his mother, enough of his life. He was done. He wasn’t going to let them destroy his future. Seeing the photos hurt.

It reminded him of the moment.

Only, he refused to go back there. He was free.

This was his choice, and he wasn’t giving that up. He wasn’t that scared little boy anymore. He was more.

He’d survived.

Doctor Gaines told him that his past could only haunt him if he let it.

Well, fuck it.

He wasn’t letting that happen. He had a good thing going for him, and that was all that mattered.

“Callen.”

He glanced up at them. “Thank you for not hiding this. Thank you for believing I could handle it. I’m stronger now than I’ve ever been. That boy isn’t me anymore. He’s my past. I’m a father. I’m a husband, and I’m more than that scared child. I’ve taken it and used it to make me. Like granddad once said, it all led us here. If it didn't happen, maybe I never would have been taken in. Then I wouldn’t have had you, Ethan. If that never happened, then I wouldn’t have hurt you, and you wouldn’t have left.”

Ethan let Callen get it off his chest.

So did Elizabeth.

Callen needed this.

“If none of that happened, Elizabeth never would have fixed us, and I never would have this. I’ve come to terms with it. All of that led to a gift, and I’m not going to let it taint it. Dean Quinlan, and my vile mother, tried to break me, and they couldn’t. Charlene tried to waste a gift she was given, and she didn't deserve me. I’m not going back. I want to be happy, and that means living in the now. It means having this life—not that one. I’ve made my choice. I choose you two. I choose our love.”

They didn't know what to say.

Who was this man?

“Now, I’m going to head into town and get us our hotel room. I’m sure that you two want to dig around and find out what he was up to before he died. We can’t be everywhere, so it’s divide and conquer. I’ll call Gabe and Livy to let them know what happened.”

He held out his hand again, and again, Ethan handed him what he wanted. Callen took the keys and headed toward the vehicle.