Choices of the Heart (4 page)

Chapter Four

Sleep took a long time to come to Reese that night. He’d sat on his porch, rocking and smoking until well after ten, wondering if she would come. In equal measure, he hoped for and feared her arrival. If they made love, what then? He’d lied through his teeth when he’d said it was only lust on his part. What a great joke that was!

Now, lying in bed, he folded his hands behind his head on the pillow and stared up at the dark ceiling of his quiet bedroom a quarter mile from the house where he’d grown up, where Chloe now slept. Crickets chirped outside the open window. Cicadas sang in the trees. But insect noises weren’t what kept him awake.

It was Chloe.

Seeing her again was harder than he expected. Touching her again. Protecting her again. He should step away, protect his heart.

But he
couldn’t
pull away.

It didn’t matter that she’d left him, chosen the city instead of him. She was still little Chloe, the girl he’d loved forever. Being near her again showed him he still craved her touch, her smell. He had to remind himself a dozen times she was leaving again in a few days, returning to her idyllic city life, without him. But while she was still here…

He rubbed his hands over his eyes and flipped to his side. A single shaft of light from the moon shone in the window. A soft breeze ruffling the drapes at the window soon raced across his body, cutting some of the heat from the humid July night.

After she’d left, Chloe wrote him countless letters. Being stubborn and angry, he never opened any of them. What could they have said that he wanted to hear? They’d worked well as kindling for the fireplace on the long, lonely nights where a good book was his only entertainment. That, and the sporadic signal from
WPLT
, the radio station out of North Platte.

Today, he’d asked her about other men. He slammed his eyes shut, frustrated at his weakness. She hadn’t answered his question. Was there a man waiting for her in Lincoln? She’d known about Isabelle somehow. He’d been honest when he said the woman wouldn’t let him touch her, but only because he’d never asked. He just didn’t look at Isabelle that way, or feel that way about her.

Damn it! What does it matter anyway?
Too much time had passed. Plus, he and Isabelle were together now. He’d marry her after harvest. If she agreed. But seeing Chloe again,
feeling
for her again, made what he felt for Isabelle seem so shallow, so fake. It made him empty inside.

With a quick punch to his pillow, he rolled onto his back. Could he ask Chloe to stay? Maybe life wasn’t as grand as she thought it would be when she’d left him. How could he ask her without looking like a fool? Could he handle being left behind again? Shouldn’t he at least try?

He sighed. Pride sure made for cold company, even on a humid July evening.

A noise in the distance filtered through the upstairs window. It sounded like footsteps on his porch and then his back door closing. He got up and looked out the window, wondering if he was imagining things. There wasn’t an auto or horse in sight. He grabbed the shotgun he had resting against the wall near to the bed and held his breath, waiting to hear more noises.

Sure enough, light footsteps came up the stairs and then down the hall toward his room. His heart was thumping. Was someone breaking in? In the back of his mind, he was hopeful Chloe was the source, that she’d taken him up on his offer of loving and had made the trek across the pasture to come to him.

“Reese?”

It
was
her. He set down the shotgun and lit the oil lamp next to his bed before pushing open the door farther and welcoming her inside.

“You came,” he said on sigh.

“I need to know something.” She walked farther into his room and stopped right in front of him.

“What’s that?” His voice was thick, his body responding to her closeness.

“Did you mean to call me a whore earlier when you offered to share your bed with me again?” She poked him in the chest with her finger. “Because that’s what I felt like when you left. I felt cheap and dirty, as if the love we shared was just nothing more than…what did you call it? Scratching an itch?”

Her voice wavered as anger poured from her.

“Have you been with other men, Chloe? After sharing your innocence with me, and your body and love for years afterward, have you given yourself to others?” He placed his hands at her waist and pulled her up against his taut, aroused body. “Have other men been inside you like you allowed me?” he whispered at her ear.

He bent his head and captured her lips with his. She opened right up to him, let him explore her mouth with his tongue, but that wasn’t nearly enough for his hungry body. He pulled away.

“Answer me, Chloe.” His voice was demanding but not cruel. “Have there been other men?”

She cupped his face with her hands and softly kissed his mouth. She stepped back, ran her hands down the back of his shoulders and arms, finally clasping his hands in hers.

“I dated only one man after I left Broken Bow,” she whispered, meeting his eyes. “He wanted me, like this, like what we have shared, Reese, but I couldn’t.” She shook her head and looked away, over his shoulder. “When he touched me, I felt like an adulterer. My body and heart were yours, and I couldn’t be with anyone else.”

“And you want this now with me, Chloe Anne?” He kissed the side of her neck in that one spot he knew she liked the best, the spot that made her melt in his arms. “You want my hands on you, all over you?”

She nodded and moved his hands to her hips. “You said you ache with need for me—well, it’s the same way for me. Only it’s not just lust I feel for you.” She threaded her hands behind his neck. “Make love to me, Reese, make me feel alive again.”

He studied her, his beautiful Chloe. If they did this, made love to each other, everything would change again. He wouldn’t be able to let her walk away again, would he?

“You’re certain?”

She nodded mutely. Her hands trailed down his back and rested on his
BVD
-clad buttocks, pulling him against her. He hesitated only a minute before dipping his head and claiming her lips. He pulled at the hem of her dress, snaking it up her thighs, over her hips, stopping only when she had to pull away from him to hurriedly remove her arms from the gown.

“Slow down, sweetheart,” Chloe whispered.

He chuckled and led her to the bed. “It’s been a long time.”

The beats of her heart were throbbing in her ears. Nervous excitement, she figured. This would be the
no turning back
point. If tonight continued as it was, she would have to marry him…live on the prairie for the rest of her life. He wouldn’t let her go again.

“Just say no, honey.”

“I want this Reese. I want you.” She made her decision.

Goose bumps raised her skin as his lips worked their magic on her neck. She couldn’t possibly think straight. Her thin, silky chemise finally plopped onto the floor, baring her to his hungry eyes.

Reese’s sharp intake of breath made her smile.

“What do you think?”

“So damn beautiful,” he whispered.

An expression of supreme tenderness covered his face, and Chloe smiled. Feeling brazen, she took his hands and placed them on her breasts, hoping he would know what she was asking of him.

He understood fully.

His hands brought to life her nipples, teasing them gently, while his teeth nibbled on her earlobe. Chloe closed her eyes on a sigh.

She reached the waistband of his drawers and slowly pulled them down, over his hips, her fingers caressing every inch as the fabric dipped lower. She knew she was on the right path when a soft moan escaped his lips. He kicked off his briefs and stood in his naked glory in front of her.

She sighed and smiled. He was a vision, better than her memories.

She moved in closer, clasping her hands together at the back of his head. Her mouth joined with his as she rubbed her body against him, the hair on his chest tickling the soft flesh of her breasts. She moved her hands back down and imitated what he’d done to her, caressing his pectoral muscles, her thumbs rubbing his flat nipples.

He pulled his mouth away, breathless.

It was Reese’s turn to take charge. What he wouldn’t give to simply plunge himself into her. He’d been without her for so long, it was impossible not to contemplate complete, quick release.

Her lips touched his nipple, and by golly if he didn’t about explode, right then and there. He caught her chin in his hand and brought her mouth up to his. This was madness.

He lifted her slight frame and placed her gently on top of his bed then joined her, leaning over her. He trailed a line of kisses down the side of her neck, heading to the cleavage between her beautiful, pert breasts. Her nipples peaked as he caressed them with his thumb and forefinger, while he kissed the life out of her mouth.

Her full, rounded hips thrust against his, wiggling for relief.

“You like that, do you?” he murmured.

“Oh, yes, Reese. I feel amazing.”

She grabbed his head and pulled him back to her breast. He chuckled before continuing his loving. Tongue and thumb continued to work in tandem, in a rhythm he hadn’t even realized he knew. Her hands on his back crept lower, massaging his buttocks and hips.

A crazed yet dazed look covered her face. He had to keep a clear head, or he would take her too quickly. With a deep exhale he rolled to his side, lying next to her beautiful body. He pulled her against him and guided her hand to the spot that most needed her attention.

Her hand stayed there, and her lips found his. Her tongue and hand moved in unison, caressing and teasing him. This was madness! Sheer, utter madness. How he had missed this!

Two could play with fire. Slowly up her hip his fingers moved. Across her cheek and down, rubbing and soothing. Daringly, he moved to the core of her femininity and was pleased as she willingly spread her legs.

“I need you, Reese. Please,” she begged.

He yanked the covers back and slipped underneath, pulling them over Chloe as well.

His mouth found her breast again, sucking and licking at the nipple. As her mind was occupied with his mouth, his hand moved between her legs, thrilled by the dampness he found. He touched her—
there
—and chuckled when she nearly launched herself from the bed.

He kissed and touched and fondled until she took his hand and made him stop.

She pushed aside the sheet and turned Reese onto his back. She used her mouth and her hands to pleasure him as she’d learned in the years they’d enjoyed doing this together. She touched his shaft, ran her finger gently up and down.

“Oh, hell yes, Chloe,” he moaned. “Honey, don’t stop!”

Then she used her tongue. He clenched his hand in the sheets, counting to ten over and over again, trying to make it last. When her small, gentle hands caressed the base of his shaft, he couldn’t hold on any longer.

He shifted and pulled her up, not willing to spend himself in such a way, not after two years apart.

“Come up here, Chloe Anne,” he whispered.

He lay there naked, among the twisted sheets, thinking of her tongue and teeth as they made a path slowly, with great determination, back to his mouth.

She looked glorious in the soft light of the lamp, her hair in a mass of tangles, a flush coloring her cheeks. She looked well loved.

“It’s my turn again.” He smiled at her, fingered and caressed his way to her feminine curls, and grinned as she moaned. He chuckled. “You have always been so loud, little one.”

His mouth caught her surprised moan as his fingers entered her. Gently at first, he then increased the pressure until she began to buck against his hand. Slowly, carefully, he pressed farther inside, teasing what he knew was very sensitive skin. His lips found her neck, and he could sense the tension he was building in her veins. This was better than anything he’d ever even fantasized about on the long, lonely nights.

“Do you want me, Chloe?”

“I do, Reese.”

He pulled away so he could look into her glazed eyes. He knew she was talking through a haze of desire, that she probably wasn’t being rational, but hell, neither was he.

She grabbed his naked hips and pulled them against her.

He used his knee to spread her legs, and he slid between her desire-slick thighs, anticipating the pleasurable release soon to come. But just as he was about to enter her, the image of Isabelle’s kind smile flittered in his head. With a curse, he stiffened and pulled away.

“I can’t, Chloe.”

“What?” she rasped, sitting upright. “Why ever not?”

He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, needing distance from her body. His head fell into his hands, and he tried to regain his composure and even out his breathing.

“I’m an honorable man, Chloe. I have integrity, and this is not right. Not anymore.” He shook his head. “I’m spending time with Isabelle, and this would hardly be fair to her. I never should have asked you to come to my bed.”