Chesapeake 10 - A Seaside Christmas (10 page)

* * *

Nell O’Brien was everything Caleb had heard her described to be, a petite matriarch who ruled over the household with a great deal of love and wisdom. Dillon O’Malley, who’d once been an old flame in Ireland and was now her second husband, sat beside her and quietly looked after her every need, putting a little extra food on her plate, keeping her water glass filled.

What really touched Caleb, though, was not the attentiveness, but the unmistakable tenderness in his expression as he watched Nell’s interactions with this huge, rambunctious family. He was clearly prepared to jump in at the slightest hint of disrespect, though it seemed unlikely to Caleb that the need would ever arise. Everyone clearly adored Nell.

“They’re remarkable, aren’t they?” Jenny commented.

Despite her very deliberate attempts to find a place at the far end of the massive dining room table, Jenny had landed in the seat beside him. Caleb had noted the precise instant when she’d realized that changing places would cause more commotion than it was worth.

“Theirs is such a romantic story,” she said, her expression wistful. “They fell in love as teenagers while she was visiting her grandparents in Ireland, but she came back to the States to marry someone else. Then, years later, she went back with the whole family at Christmas...” She looked at him. “I told you about that trip, right?”

Caleb nodded. What he remembered, though, was that she’d found out on Christmas Day that her mom and Thomas were expecting a baby. That news had left her reeling. He was a little surprised that she remembered other events of the trip with such distinct fondness.

“Anyway, Nell went to the old tobacco shop that had been run by her grandfather. Dillon had worked there during the summer, and he was still there. He owns it now, along with a ton of other businesses. He was a widower, and he’d never forgotten her.”

She smiled. “Mick nearly had a heart attack over his mother dating an old flame. You’d have thought she was an errant teenager, rather than in her eighties,” she told Caleb. “Everyone else thought it was fantastic. Dillon came here for a visit a few months later, they got married in the garden at Nell’s cottage on the same day his granddaughter married Luke, Nell’s grandson. Now they live there.”

“That is pretty amazing,” Caleb said. It was proof of just how long love could endure when it was right. He could only hope his and Jenny’s was that strong.

He noticed that on Jenny’s other side, her little brother was trying to get her attention. More than once, he’d noticed how difficult it seemed to be for Jenny to warm up to the boy who clearly craved her affection.

“Hey, buddy,” Caleb said. “What’s up?”

There was no mistaking the frown on Jenny’s lips, even though it came and went in a heartbeat as she reluctantly turned to Sean.

“Guess what, Jenny? Mommy and Daddy bought me a guitar so I can learn to play music like you,” Sean announced excitedly. He’d clearly decided music might be the link to tie him to his big sister.

“Wanna hear me play?” he asked her.

When Jenny remained silent a beat too long, Caleb jumped in. “Absolutely,” he said at once. “We can have a jam session after lunch, you and me. How about it?”

Sean looked confused. “What’s a jam session?”

“We’ll play something together,” Caleb explained. “Maybe I can teach you some chords or one of Jenny’s songs.”

“One of Jenny’s songs,” Sean said beaming. His expression faltered as he turned to her. “Would that be okay?”

Caleb awaited her reply with almost as much nervousness as Sean did.

“Of course,” she told him.

“Me, too. Me, too,” Emily Rose announced when she overheard them. Her face fell. “But I don’t have a guitar.”

“I have a spare,” Caleb said at once. “It might be a little too big for you, but we can figure out a way to make it work.”

Jenny seemed startled by his response. She leaned over. “Caleb, you don’t have to do that,” she told him quietly. “I know how expensive those guitars of yours are. They’re not toys.”

“It’s no big deal,” he insisted. “I want to do this.” Maybe she hadn’t seen the hope in that little boy’s eyes, but he had. And who could turn a blind eye to Emily Rose when she was filled with such boundless excitement? Somebody had to build a bridge between all of them. Maybe he could at least get it started.

Jenny shrugged. “Up to you.”

He gave her a long look. “You’ll be joining us, right? We need Jenny to play, too, don’t we, Sean?”

The boy’s head bobbed enthusiastically. “Please, Jenny.”

“Yes, please, Jenny,” Emily Rose echoed.

Jenny hesitated, then nodded. “Sure.”

Over Sean’s head, Connie caught Caleb’s eye. “Thank you,” she mouthed.

He merely winked back.

He’d wondered when he came to Chesapeake Shores if he could possibly make peace with Jenny, wondered, too, if he’d ever find a way to fit in. Day by day, though, it was increasingly clear that while they might not entirely trust him yet, Jenny’s extended family had warm hearts and were eager to welcome him. He might even have a role to play in at least one little boy’s relationship with the big sister he so desperately wanted to impress.

* * *

Caleb had run out to his truck to retrieve his guitars after lunch while Jenny hid out in the kitchen helping the women clean up. She’d harbored the faint hope that he wouldn’t come looking for her on his return.

“I like your young man,” Nell said to her as they put away the dishes while Jess, Abby and Bree finished drying them. “I’m aware he made some mistakes, but I can tell how fond he is of you.”

“He’s not my young man,” Jenny told her. “Not anymore.”

Nell chuckled. “If you’ve told him that, he doesn’t seem to be buying it.”

“Because he’s stubborn,” Jenny said in frustration.

“Well, for whatever it’s worth, I don’t think you should be so quick to write him off.”

Jenny regarded her curiously. “Why? You’ve barely exchanged more than a few sentences with him.”

“I saw how kind he was to Sean,” she said simply. “For a man who’s new to all of us to see what that child needed—what you need—demonstrates a depth of sensitivity I don’t see all that often.” She smiled. “Except in my own family, of course. I like to think I’ve had a little influence with them.”

Just then Caleb came back into the kitchen, Sean and Emily Rose hanging on his every word. He’d made conquests, Jenny thought, not entirely certain how she felt about that. How was she supposed to hold out, to cling to her well-deserved anger, when everyone else was giving Caleb the benefit of the doubt?

Caleb bent down and whispered something to Sean. A shy smile spread across her little brother’s face, though there was uncertainty in his eyes as he approached Jenny and Nell. As if she understood, Nell put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

“Jenny, Caleb wants to know if you’re ready to play music now,” Sean asked, his expression hopeful.

Aware that everyone in the kitchen had gone silent awaiting her reply, she bit back any last trace of resentment and forced a smile she hoped looked genuine. “Absolutely,” she told him. She glanced at Nell. “Do you suppose Mick would mind if we used his office, so we don’t drive off the rest of the guests? This could be more noise than music.”

Nell immediately shook her head. “I think we’re all going to want to hear. You’ll play in the living room.” She glanced toward Caleb. “If you happen to play a few old Christmas carols, I might even be tempted to join in on the piano.”

Caleb grinned at her. “Now we have ourselves a real jam session, Sean.”

Sean ran back to him and slapped his hand in a jubilant high five.

Jenny shook her head. “The man is full of surprises,” she commented under her breath.

Nell laughed. “Take a word of advice from someone who’s been around a very long time. Surprises are essential. Not a day goes by that Dillon doesn’t find some new way to take my breath away. Whoever thought that at my age, with all I’ve seen and done, anyone would be able to do that again?” She glanced toward the doorway to the dining room, spotted the man in question, and blushed like a girl.

“I hope I can find someone like that someday,” Jenny said.

Nell pointedly looked in Caleb’s direction. “Not that my opinion is the one that counts, but it seems to me you already have.”

Jenny had a huge amount of faith in Nell’s wisdom, but this time? She told herself Nell wouldn’t have sounded half so certain if she knew everything Caleb had done not only to destroy his own life, but to rip her heart to shreds, too.

Of course, the real problem was that even though she’d lived through the experience, she was starting to have trouble remembering just how devastating it had been. And that, she warned herself, certainly wasn’t good.

Chapter Ten

J
ust a few notes into one of the first hits that Caleb had recorded of one of Jenny’s songs, Emily Rose picked up a pink princess hairbrush and began belting out the lyrics like a little pro. She missed the notes more often than not, but made up for it in flair and enthusiasm. Caleb accompanied her with an expression of astonishment on his face. As she strummed along, Jenny couldn’t help laughing at the two of them. She wasn’t sure which one was having more fun.

When they’d finished their duet, everyone in the room burst into spontaneous applause and cheers. Emily Rose bowed deeply from the waist, a huge grin on her face. Caleb leaned down and kissed her cheek, whispering something into her ear that had her laughing, then scampering away to climb into Jake’s arms.

Caleb and Jenny put down their guitars then, since it was evident that nothing could top that performance. As the family slowly started to disperse, Caleb moved closer to Jenny. He gave her a peck on the cheek no friendlier than the one he’d given Emily Rose.

“A pleasure performing with you again,” he said, his voice solemn, but a twinkle in his eyes.

“Is that what you said to Emily Rose?”

“Nah. I told her I was thinking we ought to team up,” he said. “I said I’d have my people speak to her people.”

Jenny laughed at the outrageous suggestion. “Watch it, pal. That little girl is already smitten. If you’re not careful, she’s going to expect you to take her on the road on your next concert tour.”

“I could do a lot worse for an opening act,” he said. “Or a duet partner. She’d have the crowds eating out of the palm of her hand.”

“Bree and Jake might object,” Jenny said, though she actually wondered about that. Bree might be all for her daughter being a superstar by age six.

“I imagine I could convince them,” Caleb said confidently. His gaze narrowed and he studied her more intently. “How about you, Jenny? Did you have fun this afternoon?”

“Surprisingly, yes,” she admitted.

“You made Sean happy, I know that.”

“He’s a good kid,” she acknowledged. She might not entirely feel the family connection the way everyone wanted her to, but she certainly wasn’t immune to his bright smile and eagerness to please.

“He adores you,” Caleb reminded her. “Your mom has obviously made sure he thinks of you as his big sister, even though you haven’t been around much.”

“I haven’t been around at all,” she corrected. “I’m still embarrassed by that. Maybe if I had been, I’d feel a stronger connection to him.”

“Instead of that last little bit of lingering resentment?” Caleb asked with surprising insight.

“Okay, yes. A part of me does resent him, but I do know that’s wrong. None of this was his fault. It’s nobody’s fault. Mom and Thomas fell in love. They had a child together, which is an incredible gift. I need to grow up and get over it. I realize that my attitude stinks,” she said, unable to keep a defensive note from her voice. “And I know everyone is still judging me for that.”

“I haven’t heard a single critical word,” Caleb told her. “In fact, it seems to me the only person who hasn’t understood how hard this has been and forgiven you for taking the time you needed to adjust is you.”

“Everyone’s just too discreet to say anything in front of you,” she insisted. “For all the inroads you may have made with your charm, you’re still even more of an outsider than I am.”

Caleb frowned. “Why do you keep saying that? You’re not an outsider, Jenny. These people are family, or at least they’re willing to be. Can’t you at least meet them halfway?”

She was startled by the impatience in his voice. Now he, too, was judging her? What right did he have? He hadn’t been here, hadn’t known the bond she’d had with her mom before Thomas and then Sean had taken her place.

“You don’t understand,” she said, blinking back tears.

“No, I don’t,” he acknowledged. “I’ve heard the longing in your voice, the admiration, when you talked about the O’Briens. I assumed they were the ones who hadn’t accepted the situation, that you were like a kid locked outside a candy store with all those wonderful treats just out of reach. Instead, you’ve had the key all along.”

She knew he was right. Why couldn’t she accept that she had a rightful place in their midst? Was she simply scared they’d take that love away as her father had? Did she think it was better never to experience it than to want it so badly, then lose it?

“I can’t think about this now,” she said. “It’s too confusing.”

For once Caleb didn’t push. “Want to take off? Maybe get a burger or something?”

She wasn’t sure which startled her more, his sensitivity or his suggestion that they grab a bite to eat. The latter was less dangerous.

“You can eat again already?” she asked incredulously. “After all that pot roast? You ate as if you’d never had a home-cooked meal before.”

“I haven’t had many like that,” he said. “My mom wasn’t much of a cook. There aren’t a lot of home-cooked meals to be had on tour. As for you, you were the queen of takeout. You had a drawer filled with menus from every place in a ten-mile radius that delivered.”

She gave him a wry look. “You always seemed eager enough for pizza.”

“One of the staples of life,” he agreed. “I’m not complaining, just observing.” He regarded her curiously. “Can you cook?”

“Sure,” she said a little too quickly. “If I have to. Play your cards right and maybe I’ll show you one of these days.”

“I’ll look forward to it. For now, how about that burger?”

“No food,” she said. “But I will go along if you’re starving.” Anything to get away from here and all the spoken and unspoken questions for which she had no ready answers.

They said their goodbyes then, thanking both Mick and Megan for including them, and then spending a moment with Nell.

“We’ll expect to see you here again on Christmas, if not before,” Nell told them. “Is that understood?”

“Yes, ma’am, and thank you,” Caleb said.

Nell regarded Jenny intently. “And you?” she prodded gently.

“I’ll be here,” Jenny promised, then acknowledged to her as she had to others, “I know how wrong it was to stay away so long.”

“You stayed away as long as it took to get your feet back under you,” Nell corrected. “Now you can concentrate on looking forward.”

Relieved by the apparent understanding which confirmed Caleb’s earlier observation, Jenny enveloped her in a warm hug. “Thanks.”

“No thanks needed, precious child. I consider you as much my granddaughter as anyone else in this family.”

Tears stung Jenny’s eyes at the comment. She didn’t want Nell or even Caleb to see how touched she was. Understanding was one thing, but unconditional acceptance? It was such an unexpected blessing.

She quickly turned away and hurried to the door. When she glanced back, she saw Caleb give Nell’s hand a reassuring squeeze. Even from the doorway, she could overhear him telling her that she’d said exactly the right thing.

“I hope so,” Nell said, sounding worried. “She shouldn’t be walking through life alone when there are so many of us who love her.” She gave him a pointed look. “I count you among them.”

“You can,” he said.

She nodded. “Then do whatever it takes to make certain she knows that.”

Jenny saw the glint of determination in Caleb’s eyes and knew then exactly how much trouble she was in. Up until now, Caleb had been pushing gently to make his way back into her life. Now, with Nell’s apparent blessing, she had a hunch he was going to launch a full-court press. And no matter how many misgivings she might have, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to resist.

* * *

“Boy, your string of conquests in Chesapeake Shores keeps getting longer and longer,” Jenny said as she and Caleb sat at a table overlooking the bay in Brady’s. “Bree, Emily Rose, the guys, Sean and now Nell.”

Caleb shrugged. “That’s just because I didn’t break their hearts,” he said simply. “That doesn’t mean most of them aren’t angry about what I did to you or wary about my intentions toward you from here on out.” He gave her a questioning look. “Are you upset about their accepting me? Do you feel as if I’m doing an end run around you?”

She shook her head at once. “I’m not really upset, just surprised.”

“You were hoping for tar and feathers, weren’t you?” he teased.

“Well, they could at least have made a pretense of hating you for my sake,” she grumbled. “At least for one afternoon.”

“How would that have made things any better? Would it have justified your holding me at arm’s length longer? Helped you to reinforce all those defenses you put into place after I hurt you?”

“Something like that.”

He held her gaze. “You do know that your opinion is the only one that matters to me, right? I like this huge extended family of yours, no question about it. They’re good people. And I’m glad they seem willing to give me a chance. In the end, though, you’re the one who counts, Jenny.”

She gave him a perplexed look. “Why do you want me back, Caleb? Is it that you can’t stand the thought of losing? Are you trying to prove something to yourself?”

He didn’t like what she was implying. “Do you honestly think I’d come after you and court you, not because I love you, but just to see if I could get you back?”

“Anything’s possible,” she said.

Caleb realized that she wanted to believe he was that shallow. It would make it easier for her to keep withholding her forgiveness.

“Then what?” he prodded. “Do you think I’ll humiliate you again? Walk away, satisfied that I’ve still got what it takes to get a woman, even one who has every reason to hate me?”

She winced at that. “It sounds horrible when you put it like that,” she said.

“It sounds horrible no matter how I say it,” he said. “Don’t you know me better than that?”

“I did once,” she said softly. “Now I don’t know. Maybe you’re just taking the whole making amends thing to a new level.”

Caleb’s temper stirred. He tried telling himself she had a right to be suspicious, a right to distrust him, but that didn’t mean it didn’t sting like crazy.

Fighting for control, he sat very still and leveled a look directly at her. “Look at me, Jenny,” he commanded very quietly, then waited until her reluctant gaze finally lifted to meet his.

“I am not playing games with you,” he said. “For all my flaws, and I have a whole ton of them, I have never used you or even deliberately hurt you. What I did do was incredibly stupid and wrong and I’ve paid for it in ways you can’t possibly imagine. I want to make that up to you, not because of any program, but because I owe that to you.”

“Fine,” she said, seemingly eager to slam the lid on the can of worms she’d opened. “Sorry.”

“No, wait a minute. You started this. Now hear me out. I loved you even though it must not have seemed that way, given the thoughtless stunt I pulled. I still love you,” he declared forcefully. “I came to Chesapeake Shores hoping to apologize. I’ve stayed, not just because Bree offered me an interesting opportunity to try something new, but to try to earn your trust again. Maybe even your love.”

She opened her mouth, but he cut her off again.

“Hold on,” he said. “You need to hear the rest. I want all of that, not to prove some point to myself, but because it physically hurts to think about going through life without you.”

There was a sheen of tears in her eyes when he finished and he felt guilty about that, but he’d said what he needed to say. She could believe him or not, but he knew in his gut that this was a turning point. If she truly believed what she’d implied before, that he was up to no good, or only here for some selfish reason, then he’d lost. They’d never get back what they’d once had.

He thought of the song that had initially sent him to Chesapeake Shores. Amazingly, it was the first time it had crossed his mind in days. He was glad he hadn’t mentioned it to her. She’d only see that as proof that his motives for being here weren’t as straightforward as he’d led her to believe. Losing that song, letting Ricky Nolan go right ahead and turn it into a hit, was a small price to pay if he could reclaim Jenny.

After he’d said his piece, he sat back. “Your turn.”

A tear streaked down her cheek. “I don’t know what to say, Caleb. I want to believe you. I really do. Since you’ve been here, I’ve seen so many glimpses of the man I fell in love with. I’ve seen new sides to you, too. The way you were with Sean and Emily Rose today...” She smiled tremulously. “I had no idea you could be so sweet and patient.”

“I like kids. I wouldn’t mind having a whole houseful, if I could have them with you.”

She gave him a startled look. “We never talked about having kids.”

“I thought you understood that’s where we were headed, at least until I went and ruined everything.”

“Kids, Caleb? Really? How would that work with all the touring and the late nights in the studio?”

He chuckled. “It probably wouldn’t, the way I was going after everything full throttle. I told you, though, that being a solo act will be different. My priorities are going to be different. There are plenty of musicians and singers who can balance a career and family.”

“Are you one of them?” she asked skeptically. “You don’t do anything by half measures. Look at how you’ve been since you got here. You’re throwing yourself into courting me. You’ve embraced this Christmas play. And I have no doubt if your agent called and said he could get you a concert gig during the holidays, you’d find some way to give your all to that, too.”

He shook his head. “That was the old me, trying to grab everything out of fear that it would disappear if I didn’t seize it right then and there. I know better now. I’ve learned to prioritize.” He shrugged. “I might even have learned a little bit about patience.”

“Seriously?”

“Hey, have I been giving you time or not? The old me would have had you in bed by now.”

She laughed. “That’s what you think. I’ve learned a few things, too. I won’t rush into some hot and heavy romance a second time.”

“And I accept that,” he said, a note of triumph in his voice as he added, “See what I mean? Patience is my middle name.”

“Caleb, what on earth am I going to do with you?” she murmured.