Chasing Second Chances (6 page)

Chapter Nine

By the time they got home, Kate felt better, her emotions under control once more and the whole incident at Rapid City forgotten. She felt terrible physically, though, her head feeling as if it was being split in two from behind, and so as soon as they arrived, she took in a pain reliever and went straight to bed, falling asleep with her pillow covering the upper half of her face.

When she woke up, it was still dark and her head still throbbed but as soon as she saw Bryan sitting at the desk near the window, she smiled.

“Bryan,” she called to him weakly.

At once, he got up, walking towards her and sitting on the bed. “You should just keep sleeping. Lloyd told me you weren’t feeling well and when I checked earlier, you were running a fever. You might be coming down with something.”

“It must be all this stress,” she said, lying back down. “And the rain.”

“The rain?”

Out of nowhere, the memory of the passionate kiss she had shared with Lloyd popped into her mind, and she quickly pushed it away, though not quickly enough to prevent a blush from coating her cheeks, which she hoped he did not notice. He didn’t have to know about it. He couldn’t. True, she had not meant to kiss Lloyd back and had only done so because her emotions had suddenly gone out of control but still, she knew it would hurt him. The guilt that was beginning to gnaw at her now was nothing compared to the pain she would feel if he found out.

“It was raining in Rapid City?” Bryan asked.

Kate nodded, remembering his question. “There was a squall just as we were leaving.” She turned towards him and placed her head on his lap. “Oh, Bryan. I felt so terrible.”

“What happened exactly?”

“It turns out that Ms. Singer was not as sane as she seemed to be. Either that or her vision was just plain horrible. The kids she had seen were the niece and nephew of a neighbor. They were staying there for a while because their parents had to go on a trip. They’re the same age as Lena and Jack but they certainly are not my kids.”

“Well, perhaps it was a honest mistake.”

“It was a hurtful mistake,” she said. “I should have listened to Lloyd and never had gone there.”

“You needed to know whether it was true or not for yourself,” Bryan said. “If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t have believed.”

She looked up at him. “I’m that stubborn, huh?”

“Stubbornness isn’t always a bad thing,” he told her as he ran his fingers through her hair. “In this case, being stubborn is a good thing, but you also have to have caution so you don’t end up hurting yourself more. I don’t like seeing you get hurt.”

She nodded. “I’ll try.”

He placed his hand on her forehead. “Your fever seems to have gone down a bit.”

“I feel a little better,” she told him. “But still under the weather.”

“You should take care of yourself a bit more.”

“Yes, doctor.”

“Then again, I can just take care of you. What good is being a doctor, anyway, if you can’t take care of the person you love the most?”

She grinned.

“And guess what? I can really take care of you from now on because I managed to find someone to fill in for me.”

Her eyes widened. “You didn’t.”

“I did.”

She placed her arms around him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Well, I’m glad.”

“I’m gladder.” He planted a kiss on her forehead. “I may not be a millionaire, Kate, and I may not know people in high places but what I am is yours. I want you to know that I’m here for you and I’ll do everything I can to get you through this.”

She wrapped her arms even tighter around him. “I’m so glad I have you.”

She lifted her head, presenting her lips to him. He sealed them, holding her close. Again, the memory of the kiss she had shared with Lloyd crossed her mind and again, she set it aside, her lips parting so Bryan could deepen the kiss and make her forget all else.

He took her cue, his tongue plunging inside her mouth to explore and then mingle with her own tongue, and she moaned. As always, Bryan was an amazing kisser, but it was not enough. She wanted more, wanted him to claim her and leave his mark on her so that she could feel completely his, just as she should be.

She ran her fingers down the muscles of his chest and abdomen, reaching for the bulge that she knew would be there in his crotch, but just as her fingers brushed against him, he grabbed her hand and broke the kiss.

“You’re not well, Kate,” he told her. “You should rest.”

“I think I’m running a different fever at the moment.” She batted her eyelashes seductively.

He gave her another kiss on the forehead. “I want you just as much, Kate, but you really need to rest.”

She sighed, giving up. “Oh well. You can’t blame a girl for trying.”

He laid her back down on the bed and tucked her under the covers. “By the way, Lt. Paulson called.”

Her expression suddenly changed to one of unbridled curiosity. “Why didn’t you say so sooner?”

“He said there was an FBI agent coming tomorrow to talk to you.”

“An FBI agent?”

“It seems like this case has just gotten bigger.”

“Oh.”

He stroked her cheek. “Don’t worry. That just means that we have more help now.”

She nodded. “I guess so. I hope it’s enough. I…”

She sneezed.

“See, I told you you should rest.” He pulled the covers higher so that they reached up to her chin. “We can’t have you getting sick.”

“Okay.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

She closed her eyes and relaxed, his words of love sounding in her ear and making her feel that she was right next to him even when he had left her side, making her smile. Strangely, though, just before she drifted off to sleep, there was another face that clouded her mind, the face of a man in a drenched shirt standing under the rain, a man who, at another time, had worn a tuxedo and stood in front of the crowd with a huge grin and eyes only on her.

Lloyd.

* * * *

Lloyd couldn’t sleep.

Each time he closed his eyes, he found himself remembering the kiss he and Kate had shared at the children’s playground in Rapid City under the rain, which in turn, made him remember every kiss they had ever shared, like that first kiss in the car and the kisses on their wedding day when she had looked so beautiful in her white gown, so radiant, so happy, and he had felt so complete.

It was not just the kisses that he remembered, though. He remembered, too, all the times that he had held her, all the times that she lay beneath him, panting, writhing, moaning, calling out his name in the rapture of ecstasy. He recalled one memory particularly vividly—the memory of them making love under a large quilt in front of a fire at a skiing lodge in Alta, Utah, just a few months after their marriage.

What had happened to them?

No, he knew the answer to that one. As far as he knew, there were only two things that could make a marriage fall apart—either one large unforeseen problem like an affair or abuse, or more commonly, the sum of many small misunderstandings and dissatisfactions that were left unresolved because words were left unsaid.

His marriage had fallen apart because of the latter. He could not pinpoint each of those small things but he knew that after giving birth to Lena, Kate had changed. For a while she went through postpartum depression, and it was a matter of bad timing that it was at that same time that he got promoted. At that time, he had thought it was a good thing. Now that he had a family, he needed to invest in their future, after all. But he had been wrong. By devoting himself to his job in order to provide an excellent future for his family, he had neglected his family. He had not been there during the times that Kate had needed him the most, and so he had destroyed that future.

It had all been his fault and so when Kate had asked him for a divorce, he had given it, even going so far as to give her the house, half his fortune and full custody of the kids without contest before moving somewhere far away, thinking that if he couldn’t give her happiness, then at least he could give her some peace.

He had thought he had forgotten all about her, but now, he knew he had been deceiving himself all along. Otherwise, he would not feel so jealous right now, so frustrated at being under the same roof as her but not having her in his bed, in his arms. He would not be hurting so much just from wanting her, not only the warmth of her body, but her smile, her tears, her soul, all of her.

God, he still loved her.

He knew, too, that she still loved him. It was only a small flicker, perhaps, one that burned unsteadily, but it was there. He had only to kindle it so that it became the fire that had burned for him before.

He had to be careful, though. The situation right now was precarious, not only because Kate was under great strain but because he was competing with Bryan. One wrong move and his one chance to get her back would go to waste, and everything would be lost.

He got out of bed, grabbed his phone and made an important phone call.

He did not care what it took. He was not going to lose her again.

* * * *

“You lost me there,” Kate told Bryan over breakfast the next morning, interrupting him in the middle of explaining something on the news about a new treatment for cancer. She still did not feel at her best, but she felt better. At the very least, her head wasn’t hurting anymore and she was able to gobble up a hearty breakfast without feeling sick.

“Never mind,” Bryan said. “You’ve got a lot to think of already.”

Kate just grinned as she took another sip from her glass of juice. She heard the phone go off again—she had lost count of the number of times it had gone off just that morning—but didn’t move. Instead, she just watched and after the third ring, Lloyd’s assistant, Sharon, picked it up, nodding and mumbling something into the receiver.

After the incident in Rapid City, Kate had to accept the fact that the phone would keep ringing, and that whoever was on the other end was not necessarily someone to be believed. In order to help her accept that, Lloyd had assigned answering the phone to his assistant, who took note of every call and screened them to try and determine which ones were worth a second thought, and a third, and which needed to be disregarded. Kate didn’t like the idea of someone else making that important decision entirely, but since Lloyd trusted Sharon, she decided to do so, as well, and so far, she was glad she did since the younger woman seemed to be taking her job seriously and doing it well.

“I’m beginning to wish I had an assistant,” she said to Bryan.

Bryan chuckled. “Aren’t you the kind of person who likes to do everything yourself?”

She sighed. “I guess you’re right, though it would be nice to have some help once in a while.”

“I’m here,” he told her. “You can order me around as much as you want.”

She smiled, then lowered her voice to a whisper as she brought her glass to her lips once more. “Says the guy who wouldn’t let me touch him last night.”

“You weren’t feeling well. That was an exception.”

“I was just kidding,” she said, nudging his shoulder.