Authors: Jo Willow,Sharon Gurley-Headley
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I learned to never underestimate my son.”
He went back to milking and I thought about that. He was giving me an anecdote, but he was also trying to teach me something. As much as I liked Grant - and I did - I couldn’t slip up and allow myself to feel impressed. Big deal. So a kid made a success out of a lemonade stand. Kids did it everyday. What made Deacon special? It made it special because it was special to Grant.
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Do the boys ever help with the cows?”
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Oh yeah. When they’re here, they do it in the morning for me while I take care of the bees. They won’t go near the bees.”
I giggled and relaxed.
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Don’t tell me they’re afraid of the bees...”
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Bees are tricky Dor’. They can smell fear and they hone in on it. You have to go in fearless with a purpose. Assume you’ll be stung and you’ll be fine. I’ve been stung hundreds of times.”
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And yet you keep the bees.”
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I love the honey more than I fear the sting. See, I have a theory...”
I smiled because that was my line.
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I think if something’s worth having, then a little pain is a fine price to pay for having it. Nothing in this life worth having is easy or pain free. Nothing.”
Again with the lessons. This one was transparent and I couldn’t let it slide.
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Grant, I appreciate what you’re trying to do for me. But I crossed a line that I can’t uncross. Deke and I really are just friends. Or we were anyway. He’s the bestest friend I ever had and I think he felt the same way. That kiss was a betrayal of the worst kind. He’s wondering now if I’m like every other woman that’s tried to trap him and he’s wondering if I found a sneaky way in by using our friendship.”
Grant stood up, gave the cow an affectionate pat, and moved to the next stall. He set his pale down near the entrance and placed my stool near the the cow. He motioned towards it and I sat down, then he put my pail beneath the cows udders. I did exactly as I’d seen him do. I gently placed my forehead against the cow and my hands on her udders.
At first, I got nothing. Then grant placed his hand upon my shoulder in a fatherly fashion and spoke softly.
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Don’t be afraid of her Dor’. Squeeze harder and twist your wrist towards the end. Pull, twist, relax.”
I did what he said and found my rhythm in no time. It was relaxing and I could see the attraction. We stood there in verbal silence for awhile, the only sound was the milk hitting the side of the metal pail.
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We both know you didn’t do that.”
His voice jolted me from the hypnotic chore I was doing.
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Didn’t do what?”
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Pull a fast one on Deacon. Once he has a chance to think about it, he’ll realize you didn’t as well. He may be skittish when it comes to women, but you’d have to get up awful early to pull a fast one on Deke. He guards himself too closely for that to happen. Don’t worry sweetheart. You’ll get your friend back.”
His kind words were my undoing. I didn’t exactly wail as I had with Pierce, but the tears came just the same. There I was sitting in a barn, milking a cow, and crying in front of Deacon’s dad. I would have been mortified if I hadn’t been so depressed. I looked up at him and I could see the compassion at my tears.
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What if I don’t get my friend back Dad? What then?”
The term of endearment pleased him, I could see it as his eyes softened and he brushed a tear away with his thumb.
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Sweetheart, if he lets you get away then he doesn’t deserve you. You’re good for him Dorothy. He’s happy with you and any fool can see that. You, are exactly what he needs. A woman that makes him think about all of his preconceived notions about women. He let you in, don’t let him shut you out.”
I turned back to finishing my chore. I spoke so softly, I wasn’t sure he could hear me until he put his hand on the back of my head gently.
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It’s not up to me. It’s up to him. Mr. Control Freak is back now and he’s not as nice to me as my friend is.”
We moved to the next stall and I sat down again, ready and willing to practice my new skill set. Grant had emptied our pails into a larger stainless steel container and he placed my pail as he’d done before. He took the same position, leaning against the opening to the stall. I had just begun milking when we heard the barn door open and slam closed on it’s own.
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Dad? Do you need any help?”
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I’d know that voice anywhere and I felt a brief moment of panic when it dawned on me that he stood between me and the only exit. So far, he hadn’t seen me, but if he came much closer he would and I didn’t think I could go another round with him in front of his father. I continued milking while I waited to see what would come next. Grant surprised me.
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Go on back in the house and see if your mom needs help. I’ve got this.”
I felt rather than heard his hesitation when he replied and it was obvious that he hadn’t figured out that I was there.
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I was hoping for some time away from Dorothy. Has she done the inquisition with you yet? You didn’t tell her anything embarrassing did you? She’s gonna be a pain in my ass until this book thing is done and I’m hoping to spend as little time with her as possible.”
He sounded busy with something and whatever it was, it kept me out of his immediate line of sight. I kept my mouth closed and kept on milking. He was doing a fine job of proving my point to Grant. Deacon wanted nothing to do with me.
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Son, I’m not sure why you’re making such a big deal out of one little kiss. I thought she was your friend.”
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I did too until she pulled that stunt. I knew she’d screw it up. The first time I met her, she had the same look that all the others have. I warned her then, do NOT fall in love with me, and I believed she could handle it. Then she went and proved my point.”
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Proved your point? With one little kiss? You must think that you’re highly prized and the star on top of the Christmas tree. What if it was nothing Deke? What if that little kiss meant exactly what she said it meant and you threw away a lovely woman and a damned good friend for nothing? What then?”
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So what if I did? She’s not THAT special Dad and you shouldn’t let her get to you. You don’t know her like I do. Trust me.”
I should have been angry. Instead, I was devastated. I had no fight left in me and even if I did, he’d just made it perfectly clear that I had nothing to fight for. I was done.
I stood up and handed the pail to Grant. He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek when he took it from me and Deacon saw the whole thing. Grant placed his free hand on my cheek and smiled.
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By the way sweetheart, that kiss meant nothing so don’t go falling in love with me or anything.”
If he was trying to make me smile he’d succeeded.
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I’ll try and remember that Grant. We both know I can’t help myself sometimes. It seems I throw myself at men left and right.”
He smiled and winked and I felt Deacon cringe. When I turned to him, he was fuming.
I spoke to Grant while I looked at Deacon.
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Dad? When he says, ‘trust me’, he doesn’t really mean it. He never means it. I should know. Trust me.”
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It’s alright Dor’. I’m not feeling very trusting at the moment and I’m starting to think that maybe I’m a tad bit smarter than my son. You go on up to the house and lie down for awhile. I’ll be up directly.”
I gave Deacon a wide berth, expecting him to have one or two cruel words left to throw at me, but he surprised me. He said nothing as I walked by. When the barn door closed behind me, I ran to the house and into the kitchen.
Bree looked up from her pizza prep and saw the state I was in. She knew where Grant and I were and what we were doing. She must have been there when Deacon went out to find his father as well.
She wiped her hands on her apron and pulled me into her arms. Were all the Sloans angels except for my ex-friend Lucifer? And how many tears can one woman cry anyway?
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Dorothy, when Grant comes in I’ll have him drive you home. Go up and get your things dear. You don’t have to put up with this, I know I wouldn’t.”
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I don’t want to take Dad away from your family, it wouldn’t be right. It’s only two more days. I can do this.”
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I’m sure you can hon’, but you shouldn’t have to. I’m appalled at my son’s behavior. I also happen to know that if you want to regain control of this situation, then you need to show him that you’re not afraid to walk away from him. That’ll make more of an impression than watching you fall apart. Hold your head up and walk away from his hateful ass.”
I gave a loose laugh and pulled away from her.
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What about Mel’?”
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What about her? She’s welcome to stay and I’ll have Anton bring her home Sunday night. He seems quite taken with her and she’s a lovely girl. Don’t worry about a thing Dorothy. I’ll keep an eye on her.”
I gave her a brief nod and trudged upstairs. There wasn’t much to pack and when I was ready, I carried my suitcase downstairs and dropped it near the front door.
I took a seat on the sofa and began to mentally go through everything I’d learned about Deacon, trying to figure out if I had enough to finish the damned book. I did not want to think about him any longer than I absolutely had to. I decided that I had enough for the meat and bones of the thing, but I still needed more about his childhood. I was still wrestling with that a few minutes later when Mel’ plopped down beside me.
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What’s with the suitcase?”
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Dad’s taking me home when he’s done in the barn.”
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Dad? Home? When did you start calling Grant, Dad, and why are you going home?”
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Since he asked me to, and, hello? Were you not here for my noteworthy performance and the aftermath? I can’t stay here two more days Mel’, there would be certain bloodshed by Monday. Especially if I had to suffer the ride back next to Deacon. No way.”
My sister chewed on her lip and I knew what that meant. She wanted to say something and was trying to grow a pair large enough to give her the courage.
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Go on. Say whatever it is. I’m at a weak point here. You’ll never get a better chance to take a dig.”
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I don’t want to take a dig. I feel like a disloyal bitch, but I don’t wanna go home yet. Is that awful?”
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Nope. You’re having a good time and these are great people. I don’t want you to go home Sis’. Stay. Enjoy yourself. Mom said you could hitch a ride home with Anton on Sunday evening.”
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Anton? Why can’t I ride home with Pierce?”
I turned to her and shook my head. Talk about a trainwreck in the making, Melody and Pierce? I felt like I needed to protect him.
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Mel’, you can ride home with Santa Claus for all I care. If Pierce is up for it, more power to ya’. I will say this though. If you hurt that guy, you’ll answer to me. Pierce is a sweetheart that does not deserve drama, bullshit, or heartache. You’d better not give him any of the above. Are you hearing me?”
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Wow. Are you sure you’re in love with Deacon and not Pierce?”
Where the fuck did THAT come from? If my head wasn’t full of “What the hell?”, I probably would’ve noticed the change in her posture. I might have noticed that her eyes were as big as a cocker spaniel’s looking at a cheeseburger. I might have, but I didn’t.
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How can you say that? I’m not in love with anybody. I’m not sure if I ever have been. Men are walking mistakes with egos. How long have I been virtually man-free Mel’? How long?”
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About three hours.”
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Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong wrong. Three years. For three damned years, I’ve lived a happy existence. Writing books, making lists, and doing whatever the hell I wanted whenever the hell I wanted to do it. Then my so called friend walked in, changed my style, and fucked me over. Even when you take them on as friends, men will find a way to break your heart. Well guess what? No more. I’ve learned a lot of lessons the hard way and this one can plant the flag on top of the pile. I’m done.”
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What if Deacon decides he feels otherwise?”
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I’ve heard enough from that guy to know he couldn’t be genuine if the deal came in triplicate and was notarized. I will never believe another word that comes out of his mouth. Ever. He ate my food, made me laugh, and convinced me to trust him when my gut told me he was a player. I thought I was safe because we were just friends. Well if this is how he treats his friends? Screw him and the Porsche he drove up in.”