Chance (20 page)

It was just after eight at
night when she knocked on the door. Bethany’s husband, Harry answered. He
looked fresh faced and happy like he always did. His hands were messy with
flour and he had an apron wrapped around his waist. He recognized her
immediately and broke into a huge smile.

“Charlotte,” he cried,
flinging the door open wide. “My God, it’s been ages. Come in, come in. Beth will
be so happy to see you.”

“Hi. I'm so sorry to show
up so late and without calling. Are you sure it’s all right I'm here?” She
hesitated before entering the apartment.

Harry just gave her a
weird, confused look and enthusiastically waved her inside.

“What are you talking
about? Of course, it’s all right. It's wonderful.” He chuckled and closed the
door behind her once she’d made the decision to walk into their warm, hallway.
The sound of the television could be heard coming from the living room.

“Beth’s in there watching
TV,” he pointed her in the right direction. “Go say hi to her. She'll be
thrilled to see you. I’m just finishing up some baking.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” she
nodded toward his hands. “What are you making?”

“Chocolate cake. It’s all
she wants, at the moment,” he smiled.

“Beth?”

“Yeah. Go see her.” He
winked at her then walked off back to the kitchen, humming happily under his
breath and leaving Charlotte standing in the hallway, still clutching onto her bag.

She dropped it down
slowly from her shoulder and left it in the corner by the front door, just in
case she wasn’t staying. She certainly didn’t want to make anyone feel
uncomfortable or obligated to take her in just because she was Beth’s old
friend. It really had been quite a while.

She turned in the
direction of the living room and took a few cautious steps towards the entrance.
She could see the back of Beth’s head over the back of the sofa.

Charlotte was startled and
literally jumped when Beth yelled, “Who was it, Harry?”

When the floor creaked
under Charlotte's feet, Beth twisted around in her seat to see who was there.

“Oh my God! Charlotte,”
she grinned practically ear to ear.

“Hey Beth,” Charlotte
responded meekly.

“Come here, come here…”
She patted the sofa next to her. “I'd get up to come and give you a hug, but…”

Surprised and incredibly happy
at the warm reception, Charlotte entered the room and walked around the sofa,
as Bethany muted the TV. It soon became obvious why Bethany hadn’t gotten up to
greet her. She was happily and hugely pregnant.

“Shit!” Charlotte
laughed, covering her mouth. “When did
that
happen?”

Her surprise was genuine.
Of all of her friends, Bethany had been the most vocal about the benefits of
never having kids.

Bethany joined in the
laughter, obviously enjoying Charlotte’s reaction of pure surprise. “Ooh,
nearly eight months ago, now.”

Charlotte sat down on the
sofa and wrapped her arms around her friend, giving her an awkward and
difficult hug with her large baby bump getting in the way.

“Wow, I never thought you'd
have kids, you were so anti…”

“What can I say? He wore
me down,” she interrupted.

They both chuckled some
more. Bethany was still grinning broadly.

“It’s really good to see
you,” she said genuinely. “I've tried getting in touch, but you never answered any
of my e-mails and your phone was always off.”

“Yeah um…” Charlotte frowned
and shook her head. “I’m really sorry about that. I don’t actually have a phone
anymore. I use Logan’s whenever I need to, which is…well…never, basically.” She
laughed awkwardly.

It felt so strange to be
talking to someone other than Logan. For months and months on end, he was the
only human contact she'd had. It was oddly liberating and within a few minutes,
she felt as though she'd at least begun to revert to her old self…had become
her
again.

She was no longer the
false Charlotte she'd custom designed and become only to please Logan. Now that
she was out of that toxic environment, she couldn’t even relate to that other
person who'd existed in the middle of an emotional minefield. She'd felt as if
her life had been devoted to trying her damnedest not to accidently detonate
any explosions.

She suddenly had no clue what
had motivated her to put up with everything Logan had thrown at her, both
literally and metaphorically. My word, she'd wasted so much time being scared
and lonely.

Bethany didn't respond to
her comment about her phone. Perhaps she'd remembered the last time she'd
criticized Logan, as well as how it led to months of silence between them. She
probably didn't even know what to say to her.

“Did Harry offer you
coffee or anything?” she asked.

“Um, no, it’s fine. He’s
busy baking, apparently,” Charlotte said with a smile.

“Yeah, God, the cravings
for chocolate cake have been insane,” Bethany laughed. "Apparently, the
baby is quite the chocoholic and it's contagious. I might need a twelve-step
program to give up my addiction once I give birth."

“About your e-mails…”
Charlotte began, getting them back on track to a more serious conversation.

She didn’t want to have
this discussion. However, she knew if she told Bethany she'd left Logan, she'd
need some kind of an explanation as to why she needed a place to stay. Bethany
was bound to ask questions about the relationship and would want to know why it
hadn’t worked out.

“Yeah?” Bethany asked,
looking serious.

“I did get them, I
honestly did. It’s just that…Logan…” she faded out as she tried to explain.

“Let me guess, he
wouldn’t let you reply,” Bethany interrupted, saving Charlotte the
embarrassment of having to say it out loud.

“Well, not really,” she
shook her head, protesting a little. “It’s not that he wouldn’t exactly
let
me,
it’s just…he said we didn’t need any friends, we only needed each other. He
said anyone who didn’t approve of our relationship would turn me away from him.
He couldn’t understand why I'd even want to speak to you in the first place,
if…well…”

“In other words, he'd make
you feel guilty about wanting to contact us or keep us in your life?” Bethany
asked.

“Yeah,” Charlotte
conceded.

“So…how come you’re here
today? I have to ask. I mean, I’m presuming he doesn’t know you’re here?”

“He doesn’t even know I’ve
left him,” Charlotte said.

“You left him? For good?”
Bethany’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Yeah, I just walked out
of the house when he wasn’t there,” Charlotte said with a weak smile.

“Oh. Why?” Bethany
couldn't help asking.

Charlotte frowned. “I…I
just had to get out. Things had gotten pretty bad between us.”

Even after all that had
happened between her and Logan, Charlotte simply couldn’t bring herself to say the
truth—not yet. It was as if saying the words out loud would somehow make them
more real and more painful.

“Well, I’m really glad you
decided to do it,” Bethany said with a smile.

“How so?”

“Because he's a prick,
Charlotte. Did he ever hit you?” Bethany blurted out, in true Bethany form, without
holding anything back. Charlotte both loved and hated this about her friend.
Some things will never change. Bethany was honest and candid. It wasn't always
easy to deal with, but she did respect how genuine and sincere she was. Bethany
didn't play mind games or manipulate others. She was true to herself. Charlotte
could learn from that.

“No, of course not,” she
lied. “He’s not like that, Bethany. He’s…”

“Stop defending him!”
Bethany interrupted her tersely, before putting her hand on Charolotte’s arm. “You
don’t have to do that anymore. He doesn’t control you now that you’ve left him.”

“He’s still my husband,
Bethany. I still love him.”

Charlotte suddenly felt as
if she was playing a dramatic role in some daytime soap opera. She couldn’t
believe the lines that were spilling from her mouth.

“Do you, Charlotte? Do
you
really
love him?” Bethany asked.

Charlotte rubbed her eyes
and sighed, suddenly changing her mind about the need to have this conversation
after all. She was confused and overwhelmed with conflicting thoughts and
feelings. It was too much for her to deal with, right now. She'd escaped her
prison and come to an old friend to apologize and ask for help. It was about
all she could handle tonight.

“Look, I’ve left him. For
now, that’s all you need to know,” she said, looking at Bethany apologetically.

“Yeah, okay,” Beth
quickly backed off. “It’s none of my business. I’m just trying to be supportive.
I thought I'd lost you forever. Hey, I’m so happy to see you. More than you
know,” Bethany said with a smile.

She wrapped an arm around
Charlotte’s shoulders, pulling her close for a cuddle.

“Harry!” she yelled for
her husband. “Get Charlotte coffee, please.”

“I’m fine,” Charlotte
protested.

“Don’t be silly. Have some
coffee. You're going to stay for a bit, right?” Bethany looked almost as if she
were begging her to stay.

“Well, actually…”

She didn’t even know how
to begin broaching the subject of staying overnight.

“Where are you 'actually'
staying? Are you going to go to your parents' house? You have a car, right?” Bethany
asked.

Charlotte felt bombarded
by too many questions all at once. She was suddenly overwhelmed. Her head was
spinning trying to figure out what to say.

“No,” she answered
slowly. “I don’t have a car. Logan keeps the keys and I don’t…I don’t know
where they are. I just left quickly; I wasn’t really thinking things out fully.”

The enormity of what
she’d done and what was happening in her life were suddenly too much for her. Having
to explain it all aloud just reinforced her helpless position.

“I don't even have any
money or anything. I have nothing,” she said.

Almost beyond her
control, her voice began to crack with emotion, as tears stung at her eyes and
threatened to trickle out down her cheeks.

In an instant, Bethany was
comforting her. She threw her arms around Charlotte again, trying her best to pull
her into another awkward hug—around her baby bump.

“Come here,” she
whispered. “Come here. Don’t worry about a thing. You’re out of there now.
That’s the main thing, right?”

“Yeah,” Charlotte said,
with her voice thick with emotion.

“You’re welcome to stay here
for as long as you'd like. However long you need, to get yourself set up. I'd
love to have you here,” Bethany offered.

“You’re…you’re sure?”

Charlotte pulled back
from their embrace, looking into Bethany's eyes to try and ascertain whether
she meant it genuinely, rather than just saying those things because of their
history as friends, or out of pity.

“Of course I’m sure,
silly,” Beth insisted. “God, come on. You’re my best friend, or one of them.
I’m not going to turn you away onto the streets or have you going back to…well,
back to him. You’re sure he never hit you?”                                                                                               

“Well…not
hit
,
exactly,” Charlotte said in a small voice.

Bethany’s eyes were
locked on hers, Charlotte felt as though Bethany was almost reading her mind.
Thankfully, Bethany didn’t pursue that line of questioning any further. She
could probably see how uncomfortable it was making her.

“Well, at least that’s
something. Now, do you need to borrow any money? I bet he didn’t let you have
any, did he?”

“He said I didn’t need any.”

Charlotte borrowed
Bethany’s phone and called her parent’s to let them know she was coming home.
Her mother wanted to know more of course, she could perhaps sense something was
not quite right, but Charlotte put her off, telling her that she would explain
everything when she arrived tomorrow.

Just then, Harry came in
with coffee and the conversation moved to lighter topics. Charlotte was happy
to stop talking about Logan and wanted to find out all about their plans for
the baby. Bethany and Harry talked about baby names as well as how excited and
nervous they were. It was great to forget about everything for a while, and
just relax with someone she loved and trusted not to hurt her.

That night, she slept in
the nursery Harry and Bethany had been decorating for the baby. It was strange
to be surrounded by toys and teddy bears, lying in a small single bed right
next to a cot; but the mattress was brand new and extremely comfy. She felt
safe.

Charlotte was awake for
an hour or so, just staring up at the ceiling worrying about Logan and what
would happen when he discovered she was gone. She realized he'd have to know by
now—know she'd left him. She was gone.