Catching You (7 page)

“Yeah, I want to give my condolences again.”

“Okay. I’ll drop you off.” I followed my mother towards the
car where my father was waiting. I guess he didn't like funerals either. I
started to get in then stopped.

“Mom, have you seen Nick?” I asked.

“I think I saw him talking to Derrick Rogers earlier. Why
don’t you try and find him?”

“Thanks.” I glanced around and I spied him a few feet away
engrossed in a conversation with Derrick. Derrick looked up as I ran over.
Brown hair, steely grey eyes, and full lips stared back at me. He hadn’t shaved
in a few days and was starting to grow a goatee.

“Nick. My mom said she could drive us over to the
Carmichael’s house," I said.

 “I’ll be right there,” he whispered something to Derrick
who nodded and walked away.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to leave you alone that
long. Derrick wanted to talk to me about something.” I noticed that he glanced
back over his shoulder.

“Is something wrong?” I asked.

“No.”

“Then let’s go. I really want to get over to the
Carmichael’s house so that I can talk to Lizzie.”

“Are you sure that’s a smart idea to bring it up while we’re
at Ryan’s house?”

“I just want to know if were still planning the cabin trip
or not.”

“Yeah, right. Promise me that you’re not going to make a
scene or anything. That’s what I’m worried about.”

“Calm down. I just want to know what was up with her little
‘speech’ at the funeral. If anyone is bringing up Ryan cheating, it’s
Elisabeth, not me. I still can't believe that he'd been sleeping with Lizzie.
He wouldn't do that to me. We're in love. We were, I mean."I sighed. I
didn't want to think about that anymore, so I decided to change the subject.

 "You’ll never guess what my mother told me last
night.” I paused, “Someone tampered with the brake line on Ryan’s car and
that’s why he couldn’t stop Friday night

“Where ….did you hear that?” he stuttered. I noticed that he
was also starting to sweat.

 “My mother told me. She said that it was in the newspaper,”
I replied. I didn’t get why he was freaking out over this news.

“She has to be mistaken. That kind of information wouldn’t
be in the papers yet. Unless someone wanted the car accident investigated. A
high school student dying on graduation night isn’t exactly news. Now, let’s
go.” He slinked towards the car.

****

As soon as my mother pulled up to Ryan’s house, I watched
Nick fumble with his seatbelt as if he couldn’t get away from me fast enough. I
had to run to catch up with him.

“Nick, wait for me.” I yanked on his arm and he turned
around.

 “What?” he asked harshly. I jumped back, shocked by his
anger.

“I just wanted you to wait for me,” I said slowly.

“Oh.” He took a deep breath, calming down.

 I stood at the door, hand frozen on the doorknob. "Are
we going to stand here all day or are we going inside?" asked Nick.

We’re going in."I pushed open the door and slipped into
the front hall. A chandelier hung down from the ceiling and on your left was a
sitting room and to your right was the dining room. I heard voices coming from
the kitchen, Nick’s grip suddenly tightened on my arm.

“I’m all right. You can loosen your grip a bit.” He let go.

“Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was holding on so tight,”
he explained.

“That’s okay. I hear noise coming from the kitchen. Let’s
see if everyone is in there.” I walked into the dining room and peeked into the
kitchen. Derrick, Bryn, and Elisabeth were all sitting at the kitchen table
picking at some food.

“Hey guys,” I said walking into the room.

Bryn glanced up at me, “Hi Lauren.”She came over to give me
a hug. “How are you doing?” Derrick got up from his seat and pulled out the
chair next to Bryn’s so I could sit down.

“I’m doing okay, I guess.” I sat down at the table and
pulled the chair closer. I noticed Elisabeth hadn’t said anything.

“I was thinking of something when we were at Ryan’s funeral.
Do you remember the trip to Nick’s parents “cabin” that we talked about
freshmen year? I know that Ryan’s not going to be with us, but I was wondering
if everyone still wanted to go. We could do it in memory of Ryan.”

I glanced around at everyone at the table. Bryn had taken
her braid out and was now chewing on a strand of her wavy brown hair. It was a
nervous habit. Elisabeth was pushing around some pasta salad on her plate.
Derrick was just sitting there. I glanced around for Nick and found him still
standing in the doorway. I guess he was worried about me causing a scene.

Derrick spoke up. “I think that would be a nice gesture. It
is going to be the last time we’re all together for a while. I say we do it.”

“I think it would be fun,” Bryn agreed.

I glanced at Elisabeth. “Lizzie?” I questioned, calling her
by an old nickname. “What do you think?”

“I guess if everyone else wants to go, I’ll go.” She
shrugged.

“Then I guess it’s settled. We’re going.”I smiled at
everyone.

“ Lizzie, Can I talk to you for a minute?” I asked

“What?” she blurted.

Nick came up behind me and grabbed my wrist. He leaned over
and whispered in my ear, “I don’t think this is the time or place to have that
conversation. This is no time for confrontations. We’re at Ryan’s house. Can’t
you two just have your cat fight elsewhere?”

“I just want to speak to you. It will only take a second.” I
watched Bryn and Derrick give each other ‘poor Lauren’ looks when they thought
I wasn’t looking. I didn’t need or want their sympathy.

“Lauren, don’t. Don’t do this right now,” he repeated, putting
his hand on my shoulder. I shook it off.

“Don’t touch me.” I snapped

“Fine I won't. Just try and be respectful and remember where
you are.”

“Do you mean like she was respectful to me. I don’t think
so. Not after that little stunt at Ryan’s funeral. Who is she to think she
knows Ryan better than I do?”

Elisabeth pushed her chair away from the table. “I told the
truth up there. You put Ryan on a pedestal. You thought he was perfect. He
wasn’t. There were things you didn’t know. And who are you to talk, anyway? I
saw you hanging on Nick at the funeral. You sure rebound fast.”

“I was not hanging on Nick the whole time. He was nice
enough to come with my family and me to my boyfriend’s funeral. Did you forget
he was
my
boyfriend?” I asked. She didn't say anything.

“Well, I guess you did forget he was my boyfriend when you
were busy screwing him, don’t even try to lie especially since I can see the
truth as if it was written all over your face!” I stared at her trying to get a
sense that she felt remorseful. I saw nothing.

“Well, he wouldn’t have to find someone else if you would
give him what he wanted,” she retorted.

“What did you just say?” I asked, my voice rising with the
last word.

“You heard me. If you had given Ryan sex, he wouldn’t have
had to go elsewhere.”

“You are disgusting.” I turned to Nick, “You were right. It
was a bad time to bring that up, but she made me do it. I need to go give my
condolences to Ryan’s mom. She’s the one who lost a son.” I began walking away.

“Lauren, hold up,” Nick said

 “Nick, I can’t handle being here, I’m heading home.”

I could not pretend anymore. I started to walk towards the
backyard when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around and found Derrick
staring at me.

“Lauren, Elisabeth is messing with you to get you mad don’t
leave because of her. Let’s talk somewhere quiet.” I looked around. Nick was
standing a little bit behind us, glaring.

"Seriously, whatever is on your mind, just say it,"
I said, feeling Derrick’s hand on my shoulder.

Derrick shook his head. "Never mind, it's not important,"
he mumbled. I shrugged and walked to the back bedroom to get my coat. I sifted
through a few and still couldn't find it.

I walked back into the living room, "Nick, where is
my…” I broke off. Nick had Derrick in a headlock and it looked like he was not
letting go.

I ran over to them. "What do you think you're doing?
Nick, he can't breathe let him go!" I screamed at Nick. "Are you
stupid?" I asked.

"No. He is.” He let go of Derrick and walked into the
living room. He came back with the coat in his hands.

“Let’s go. Your mom is picking us up in ten minutes.”

“Did you call her while I was looking for my coat?”

“Yes. She was picking your brothers up from somewhere. Now
let’s go,” he repeated.

“Wait, let me say goodbye to Mrs. Carmichael.” I went into
the living room and found her in the middle of a conversation so I waited a few
minutes.

“I just wanted to say bye and give my condolences. Sorry I
can’t stay longer. I can’t handle being here.” I lied.

“I understand.” She leaned over and gave me a hug. “Don’t be
a stranger now.”

“I won’t,” I promised and left the room. Nick was waiting
for me in the hall. When we got outside, my mom’s van was parked at the curb. I
got inside without saying a word to Nick.

I climbed into the car careful not to wake my brothers who
were sleeping in the middle seat. I sat in the back seat and buckled up. Nick
buckled up next to me.

I spoke in a whisper as to not wake the boys up. I glanced over.”
Nick, what was that all about?”

“What?” he asked.

“The scuffle back at the house with Derrick." I didn’t
want to spill any details in fear that my mother would overhear us.

“It was nothing, don’t worry about it.” He patted my hand

“I want to believe you that’s true, but I just have a weird
feeling about it. Feel free to tell me that I’m overreacting though.” He didn't
say anything. And, I didn’t bring it up the rest of the way home. I couldn’t
help but wonder if Nick was telling me the truth. I had no reason to think he
was lying. He was the one person I knew to tell me the truth.

A few minutes later, my mother pulled into our driveway.
Nick got out of car, thanked my mother, and started walking away. I let him go.

 I couldn’t believe that it was July 1
^st
already.
In another month my friends and I would be off to different colleges. I had been
accepted to CSU, but now I felt weird going away. How could I just move on with
my life, as if everything was normal, when it wasn’t?

I lay down on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I was bored. I
needed to do something
.
I jumped up off the bed, grabbed my empty plate
and cup, and walked downstairs. The house was too quiet. I went into the
kitchen and saw a note on the fridge,

WE HAVE GONE TO THE STORE, BE BACK LATER. LOVE MOM.

I ripped the note off and tossed it in the trash. I wasn’t
hungry, but boredom led me to scan the fridge for something else to munch on. I
grabbed another pop and headed over to the couch. I flipped channels until I
found a marathon of
Gilmore Girls
and kept it there. I sighed.

This is so depressing.
Here I am on a Friday night in
my pajamas at 7 p.m. I missed Ryan. We spent every Friday night together. I
clicked off the television, wrote my parents a quick note in case they came
back, and grabbed my jacket. I was too restless to stay at home. I didn’t even
bother changing clothes.

I just began walking, no destination in mind. Ten minutes
later, I found myself standing in front of Derrick’s house. There were cars in
the driveway so I knew that someone was home. I hadn’t talked to him since
Ryan’s funeral. I’d been avoiding everyone since the confrontation with
Elisabeth. Nick had been right. Ryan’s house was no place to act like that at
all.

I knew Derrick had been trying to tell me something, but I’d
left before he had his chance. Now, I could change that. I just hoped he hadn’t
changed his mind. I walked up to the door and knocked, waiting to hear noise
from inside. I heard the rustle of feet, but couldn’t tell if was little feet
or paws. A few seconds later, a woman answered the door.

She looked breathless, as if I had caught her in the middle
of a workout or something.

“May I help you?” she asked politely.

"Hi, I’m Lauren Bailey, Derrick's friend. Is he
home?" I asked. She nodded. "Do you think that I'd be able to talk to
him? It's
really
important." I said, emphasizing really.

“Oh, yes. He told us about you.”
Hmm. I wonder what he’s
been saying about me. I’m probably the girl whose boyfriend died. That’s my new
title.

She put out her hand. “I’m Andrea, Derrick’s older sister."
They had the same steely grey eyes.

She turned and yelled up the stairs. “Derrick, you have
company.” I stood there waiting and a few minutes later, I heard footsteps
coming down the stairs.

"Lauren.” He stopped at the bottom of the stairs. “What
are you doing here?" he asked, biting his lip. He was wearing slightly
worn blue jeans and a black t-shirt with some band name I didn’t recognize on
it. His hair stuck up in the back, as if he’d been asleep.
He looks cute
with his hair sticking up like that.

“I didn’t feel like being home alone and remembered that
you’d been trying to tell me something at Ryan’s funeral. I thought I’d come
over so that we could talk.”

 “Oh that, never mind. It was nothing. Forget I said
anything.”

“Are you sure? It seemed pretty important.”

“Yeah, I’m sure. You’re with Nick now.”

“Yeah, but what does that have to do with..” my words
trailed and it began to make sense.

“Are you trying to tell me that you have feelings for me?
How come you didn’t tell me this before?” I asked biting my lip.

“I’m not sure. I saw how mean Ryan could be to you and all I
wanted to do was pull you aside and tell you that you didn’t have to date a
jerk like him. That you could date me. And now, you’re back to dating Nick. Are
you just attracted to jerks or something?” he asked.