Carrying Hope (13 page)

With my jaw set into a firm line and my eyes narrowed in barely-contained rage, I turned my attention back to Tanner.

“It’s not a matter of wanting to. I
have
to.”

He frowned, but didn’t object.

“All right. The only way you’re going to be able to focus is to get that woman out of your head.”

I agreed. I would take her out the next day. Maybe if I spent some time with her I would realize that we weren’t fated or anything ridiculous. It was a coincidence that our paths ever crossed and soon she would only be a distant memory.

Chapter 15

I was just getting ready for bed, brushing my hair and fixing it into a long braid, when there was a knock on my door. I assumed it was Clara, coming to ply me with more goodies that I didn’t need. I kept complaining to her that I was going to gain a thousand pounds with all of the sweets and treats she showered me with. Of course, she argued that I was
supposed
to gain weight while pregnant. Hard to argue with that logic.

“Come in!” I called, not moving my eyes from the mirror.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t be asleep yet.” Bryce’s deep timbre surprised me and made me jump a little. He was the last person I would have expected to be at my door.

“No, not quite yet,” I replied, wondering what he wanted. Was it finally time for him to kick me out? I braced myself for the bad news that I thought was coming.

“I wanted to ask you something.” He was still standing just inside the doorway, as if he were afraid to come any closer.

“Okay?”

“How would you feel about going to dinner with me tomorrow night?”

I nibbled my bottom lip nervously. That definitely wasn’t what I expected him to say. He was full of surprises tonight. I couldn’t help but wonder what prompted the offer. He hadn’t spoken to me in weeks and now he suddenly wanted to take me out?

“I appreciate the offer, but…”

“Please don’t say no, Marcie.” Thinly-veiled pain rang through his words and my heart went out to him.

“Well, I still don’t have anything nice,” I floundered trying to come up with an excuse.

“We can go shopping, or you can go without me. I know you don’t feel comfortable with me buying things for you, but you can’t keep wearing the same clothes forever.”

I frowned, knowing he was right. Winter would be here before I knew it and without warm clothes I was going to freeze. I pursed my lips, trying to find a way to keep my pride and my distance from him; I came up empty.

“Okay, you win.”

I was rewarded with a huge smile from him that made my heart skip a beat. I hated how he did this to me! I was complete putty when he was around.

“I made a call today and made you an authorized purchaser on my black card. You’ll have your own in a few days, but for now you can hold on to mine.” He removed the card from his wallet and set it down on a table by the door.

“What? How can you even do that without telling me about it?”

He shrugged.

“When your bank account is as large as mine, the credit card companies tend to bend over backwards for you.”

“You are infuriating!” I groaned, not really meaning it. I couldn’t believe that he’d made such a huge leap to trust me with that kind of money.

He pouted, looking absolutely irresistible when he did.

“Why can’t you just accept a gift?”

“Because, it’s too much! Maybe you’re used to all of this, but I’m not. I’m used to having to decide between paying the water bill or the light bill. I’m used to having landlords pounding on my door because my rent check bounced. I’m not used to private jets and no limit credit cards.”

“I’m sorry, Marcie. I never thought about it that way. I only want to make you happy. I’m not trying to buy your affection or anything.”

“I… I mean, I didn’t… mean to… um…” I stuttered, unable to form a coherent sentence. He wanted to make me happy? He wanted my affection? Who was this man? For two weeks he pretended that I didn’t exist.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “Enjoy yourself shopping tomorrow and then we’ll continue this discussion at dinner. Deal?”

I nodded, still tongue-tied by his revelation.

“Have a good night, Marcie.”

“Night good… Bryce,” I muttered, wincing at how stupid I sounded.

He chuckled as he pulled my door shut, leaving me alone to wallow in my own awkwardness.

The next morning, Francis knocked on my door bright and early.

“Miss Marcie? Your driver is ready to take you into town whenever you’d like.”

I groaned, trying to eke out a few more winks of sleep. I knew that I was better off just getting up to face the day. It couldn’t be all that terrible, could it? Girls liked shopping. I always hated it because I didn’t have any money, but this was different. Now I had more money than I could wrap my brain around and I didn’t know how to process that.

“Francis,” I called, wiping sleep from my tired eyes, “do you know where Bryce is taking me for dinner?”

“Yes, ma’am, but he wants to keep it a secret.”

“Can you at least tell me if it’s going to be fancy?”

“I believe formal attire would be appropriate, yes.”

I couldn’t stop my moan of frustration.

“And I suppose there’s no way around that, is there?”

Francis smirked and then quickly cleared his throat to cover it up.

“No, I’m afraid not. Master Dorian has his heart set on this particular location.”

I sighed, knowing I’d been defeated. It wasn’t fair to have the butler fight your battles for you, but if he wanted to play dirty, I could too.

“Okay, tell the driver I’ll be ready in ten minutes.”

“Of course,” he said with a half-bow.

I rolled my eyes; he never dropped his butler routine. Apparently, according to Clara, he’d attended some fancy butler school overseas. I didn’t know if that was true, but I knew enough to know that this house would crumble without Francis’s watchful eye.

My hand trembled as I slipped the black credit card into my pocket. I couldn’t even begin to fathom the amount of money Bryce must have. Oddly, the thought comforted me. I shouldn’t feel guilty for buying myself nice things when it wouldn’t even make a dent in his bank account. The part of my brain that controlled scheming was working in overdrive. He’d finally begun to make a move and I didn’t want him to back out now, so I was going to go out of my way to look incredible.

I’d never really had the opportunity to care about my appearance. Without a mother around during my teenage years, I never learned how to apply make-up or do anything with my unruly curls. Being a young woman and having only your father’s hand-me-downs didn’t exactly make great fodder for a confidence boost.

I made a face at my scuffed sneakers as I climbed into the waiting town car. Even as an adult I didn’t really have the kind of income that allowed me to spend anything on myself. I probably had the smallest wardrobe of any twenty-five year old woman in America; especially now that most of my clothes were left behind at Kevin’s. It would be nice to have something different to wear. I didn’t know how I felt about trying to look sexy; I wasn’t entirely sure I could pull it off, but I was certainly going to try.

A lot of my memories of my mother were from shopping trips. My mother was a firm believer in retail therapy and spent my father’s hard-earned money on frivolous things that she didn’t even care about. Maybe that was why I’d always despised the activity: it reminded me of my mother’s betrayal. Bryce didn’t know that though. He was only trying to do something nice for me and there was no need for me to punish him for my mother’s misdeeds. If he wanted me to treat myself, I would.

“Do you know where you’d like to go, Miss?” The driver asked.

I froze; I didn’t think that BargainMart was the right answer. I needed something formal, but I had no idea where to go for that.

I leaned forward, sticking my head through the space where the partition would be if it were up.

“I’m gonna level with you, I have no clue what the hell I’m supposed to be doing. Where would I go to get something super fancy?”

The corners of his lips twitched upwards and he nodded.

“I know just the place; don’t worry.”

“Oh, good,” I said with a sigh, sitting back in my seat. That was one worry out of my mind. Now I just had to focus on finding the perfect ensemble.

I didn’t even know if they made fancy dresses in my size. That was another thing I always despised about shopping. Typically when I needed new jeans or shirts I just went to the men’s section instead of trying to find something feminine to fit my plus-sized frame.

Regardless, I had faith that Bryce’s black card would be able to conquer any wardrobe challenges I encountered.

As the car rolled to a stop in front of the boutique, my stomach filled with butterflies. This was so not my element. I didn’t know anything about fashion or how to match shoes with dresses. I didn’t even know how to walk in heels. If I was going to do it, I needed to just suck it up and jump right in. Taking a deep breath, I exited the car and walked into the small store with as much confidence as I could muster.

Immediately I knew I stuck out like a sore thumb; not only was every other woman in the store a stick figure, but my ragged clothes next to their designer duds made me look like a bum. A sales clerk approached me with a sneer on her face.

“The restroom is for customers only,” she spat with her hands on her bony hips.

I opened my mouth to respond, but another salesperson butted in before I could.

“We don’t carry
your size
anyway,” she hissed.

All of my worst fears were coming true. It was the mean popular girls in high school all over again. I was poor and fat and not on their level in any sense. Except now I had a secret weapon.

I slipped my hand into my pocket casually.

“Oh, okay, I’m sorry. Do you know where I could get something nice for a special occasion? Actually, I need a whole new wardrobe…” I withdrew the card from my pocket and watched them follow it like a cat stalking its prey.

They stammered, dumbfounded and made frantic motions to try to stop me from walking out of the store.

“That’s okay, I’ll find something on my own, thanks anyway!” I replied with far more enthusiasm than I felt. I wanted to curl up and cry. I’d been through plenty of humiliating experiences, but I’d never been turned away from a store before.

I left the store, my hands shaking with fury and climbed into the car, slamming the door behind me.

“What’s wrong, Miss?”

I was fine until he asked what was wrong. After that, all bets were off. My eyes welled up with angry tears and I buried my head in my hands to hide my shameful display. I swiped at my tears furiously, before sniffling and looking back up to answer him.

“My name’s Marcie,” I introduced myself.

“It’s a pleasure, Marcie. I’m Renaldo. So what happened?”

“Are you Bryce’s usual driver?”

He looked confused for a moment, so I’d already guessed the answer by the time he spoke.

“No, I work for a service. I drive different people all of the time.”

“Okay,” I leaned forward, wiping my face again, “If you haven’t noticed, I’m not like your usual clientele. This is like a different planet for me. Those people,” I gestured back to the store, disgusted that I even called them ‘people’, “They’re terrible. I need somewhere that’s going to treat me like a human being.”

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, Miss… Marcie. I never would have brought you here had I known that you would be treated poorly.”

I smiled at him, letting him know he was forgiven.

“I think I know an even better place. My wife works there and she will treat you like a princess.”

A wide grin spread across my face.

“That sounds perfect! You’ll be my hero if we pull this off.”

Of course, all of the confidence I’d managed to gather was now completely gone. I knew that Bryce didn’t mean for this excursion to be torturous, but it was. I already had enough self-esteem problems without piling onto them by trying on mountains of clothes that didn’t fit me.