Cardinal (20 page)

“Just Heidi.”

I nearly choke. “Heidi?  As in red-haired,
bitch-face Heidi?”

Dean smirks. “Gunnar told me about your
confrontation in his hallway. Did you not expect to see her on tour?”

I’d forgotten about that part of the
conversation. “Does she know I’m here?”

“I didn’t tell her.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s none of her business who’s in my
band.”

This ought to be interesting. “She’s going to
be pissed when she finds out. You might lose a groupie.”

Dean shrugs. “It’s nice to have the girls
around, but they’re not necessary. I let Heidi and her friends tag along
because their reaction to the band stirs up interest. If she wants to play
dirty, however, she can go. It makes no difference to me.”

“It might get dirty,” I warn him. “She hates me.
I don’t know what I did but –”

“You stole my brother’s attention.” Dean talks
as he autographs. “Heidi’s been after Gunnar since his voice changed. I think
she thought the two of them would bond over Audrey’s death, but it didn’t
happen. No matter how hard she tries, he doesn’t want her.”

I think about what he said. She does act like a
spurned lover.

Dean continues. “You know why I call Gunnar my
brother, right?  I was a foster kid.”

“I know.” I smile. “Latson told me. He told me
about his – your – mom, too. I’m sorry she’s sick.”

“You and me both.”

“Hey.” I feel a tap on my shoulder. “Can we get
some of those pens over here?”

I grab a few and turn around to hand them to
Drew. “Thanks,” he says. “Oh, and here’s a tip. The more you drink, the less
you’ll feel the carpal tunnel.”

I laugh.

Dean and I continue to sign until the Eagles “Hotel
California” comes on. He starts to sing and I join him, until footsteps and laughter
interrupt our duet. I look up to see Heidi and her entourage approaching. They’re
wearing tight, skimpy outfits with little strappy tank tops and heels. Heidi’s
all big smiles and swaying hips until she sees me. Her eyes narrow and her walk
slows, yet she makes it to our table. She looks down and picks up one of the
band posters.

“What the hell?” she hisses and turns to Dean. “Please
explain why this bitch is here.”

“I think it’s obvious.” Dean remains nonchalant.
“She’s in my band.”

“Since when?”

“Since I asked her.”

“She has no talent!”

“Says who?”

“Says me!”

I pick up my glass and take a drink. This is
entertaining.

“You must not have ears,” Paul says from behind
me. “She’s fucking talented. And, hey, by the way, long time, no see.”

Heidi shoots him an evil glare. “You didn’t
call
me
, remember?”

My eyebrows shoot up.

Heidi turns her attention back to Dean. “I
didn’t sign up to watch
her
on stage.”

“Then look past her and at me,” Drew says over
my head. “I’ll be the one behind the drums.”

“Or,” Paul stands, “you could not show up at
all. It wouldn’t hurt my feelings any.”

Heidi scowls and focuses on me. “You’ve got
them all wrapped around your little finger, don’t you?”

I shrug. I refuse to get riled up. Instead, I
grab a Sharpie and remove the cap. I sign another poster and ask, “Should I
make this one out to Heidi or do you prefer another name?”

She slams her hand down on the table and leans
into my space. “You don’t get it, do you?”

“I’m sorry. I guess I don’t. Do you want me to
sign your hand instead?” I move quickly, getting a J and an E on her skin
before she yanks her hand away.

“You …” she seethes. She points at me and looks
at Dean. “I’m not putting up with this!”

“No one said you had to.” Dean raises his glass.
“Why don’t you take a seat and relax. Jen won’t talk to you if you don’t talk
to her. Right, Jen?”

I nod.

“Ugh!” Heidi huffs and stomps off to an empty
table. One of her girlfriends follows her, while the other three remain by us.

“Wow.” A nameless woman steps forward. “Hi. I’m
Brooke.” She extends her hand to Dean. “I don’t want to get off on the wrong
foot. I have no idea what’s going on, but I’m super excited to hear you guys play.
So are Kate and Lisa.” She looks over her shoulder at the other two girls.

Dean shakes her hand. “That’s good to hear. Are
you familiar with our music?”

Brooke blushes. “Um, no. Not really. Heidi just
said she was following a band and we could come along. Maybe meet the guys and
help out and ... I don’t know. Have fun, I guess.”

“Well, ladies, you’ve come to the right place.”
Paul grins and pulls over two empty chairs. “You’re more than welcome to join
us.” He looks around. “I don’t see another empty seat. One of you will have to
sit on my lap.”

One of the girls, Kate or Lisa, I’m not sure who,
happily volunteers.
Jesus,
I think.
So it begins.
I’ve yet to see
any “rock star” behavior out of any of the guys; I suppose it had to start
sometime. As Paul plays Bad Santa, I roll my eyes and go back to what I was
doing. I silently wonder how interesting things will get once we’re out on the
road. I have no idea how big the tour bus is. Should I invest in sound-proof
headphones?

“Don’t worry about Heidi,” Dean interrupts my
thoughts.

“Do I look worried?”

“I don’t know. You’re making some kind of
face.”

I laugh. “I’m just thinking, that’s all.”

“About?”

I glance back at Paul, Drew, and the girls. Their
flirting makes me miss Latson. Not that I haven’t missed him every day, but
this kind of throws it in my face.

“Hellooo,” Dean says. “What are you thinking
about?”

I sigh. “That there’s only one lap I’d like to
sit on.”

Dean gives me a knowing smile. “You guys will
be together before you know it.”

“You promise?”

“Promise.”

~~~~

“God, I wish you were here.”

I stare at my reflection in the dressing room
mirror as I hold my phone to my ear. I’m trying to remain calm, but we go on
for the first time
ever
in about an hour.

“You’re going to be fine,” Latson reassures me
through my cell. “I know it. I can feel it from two time zones away.”

I let out a heavy breath and blow my side bangs
off my face. Mona, our stylist, intricately curled my hair to the left, since I
decided to grow a zit on that side of my forehead. I know it’s from stress, but
come on. Did it have to show up on opening night?

“Take a picture of yourself and send it to me,”
Latson says. “I want to see you before L.A. does.”

“Okay. Hang on.” I put his call on hold and do
as he asks using the mirror. I send the picture as a text message and then go
back to the call. “Done,” I say.

It takes a minute before he receives it. “You
look amazing,” he says. “Where’s the sign that says your mine?”

I laugh. “It will be spelled out in lights over
my head on stage.”

I have to admit that Mona did a great job
despite my new friend Zitty McZit. She gave me cat eyes with thick, black liner,
and she made my lips look pouty with two shades of lipstick and some sort of
gloss. My cheeks look perfectly pink, and the clothes she picked out are cute ankle
boots, tight jeans, and a sheer white peasant blouse. I’m wearing a black
mid-riff tank underneath it, and my hair falls in waves down my back.

“I miss you,” I say. “I could use a kiss for
encouragement right about now.”

“If I was there to kiss you I wouldn’t stop. You’d
be late for the show.”

“I’d be willing to risk it.”

Dean gags from behind me. My tone must give me
away. “Are you two getting all mushy?  We’re taking good care of her, G!”  He
yells so Latson can hear.

“Tell Dean to worry about himself,” he says.

A guy wearing a headset knocks on the open door.
“D.U.?  You have five minutes until meet and greet.”

“Thanks,” Dean says.

I meet his eyes. “D.U.?”

“It’s short for the band name. It’s easier.”

“Oh.”

“Still learning the ropes?” Latson asks.

“Yeah. They don’t give all the secret codes to
the new kids.”

Roxanne comes speeding around the corner. “Why
are you all still in here?  Meet and greet. Now. Walk.”

“Gotta go,” I say to Latson as I hop off the
stool. “Wish me luck.”

“You don’t need it,” he says, “but break a leg
anyway.”

I fall in line behind Rox, Dean, Paul, and Drew.
We make a few turns down a couple of hallways before we’re led into a small
conference room. There are no tables or chairs, just a group of about twenty
people wearing lanyards and holding stuff like cameras and papers. Roxanne
stops us before we get too close.

“These are the VIP people who paid extra for
close seats. They get to meet you now and Ariel after the show. So be nice,
smile, and sign whatever it is they want you to sign.”

We nod and she releases us. The guys wave and
greet the fans like the pros they are, while I do my best to fit in. A few
cameras flash and Dean’s name is shouted before Roxanne and another attendant
start to let people forward. The first two ladies look like sisters and wear
huge grins as they ask Dean to sign t-shirts. They each pose for a picture with
him and then make their way down the line. We each sign their shirts and they
want pictures with all of us, which surprises me. I mean, who am I?  They
haven’t even heard me play.

At the end of the session I meet a girl who
came to see the show with her mother. She looks about twelve years old and asks
me to sign her backstage pass.

“Sure. What’s your name?”

“Amanda.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Amanda.” I sign my name
next to the words “Renegade Tour.” “Are you excited to see Ariel later?”

She nods. “And you, too.”

“Me?  No one knows me.”

She blushes. “I didn’t know girls could play in
rock bands. I always thought they had to be pop singers.”

“Oh, no,” I say. “Girls can be band members. They
can play any instrument they want.”

“What do you play?”

“The guitar.”

“That’s cool.” She looks at her pass I just
signed and smiles. “Thanks. I haven’t heard any of your music yet, but I’m sure
I’ll like it.”

“I hope so,” I say as her mother asks us to
stand together for a picture.

We finish the meet and greet with time to spare
since not everyone who purchased a VIP ticket showed up. Roxanne explained some
people buy the tickets just to meet the headliner, but she hopes that will
change the longer we’re on tour.

“You have half an hour before show time,” she
announces. “Make the best of it.”

Without consulting the guys, I decide to go
back to the dressing room to busy my hands. I need something to pass the time
to keep my mind off what I’m about to do. Even though I’m using another guitar
on stage courtesy of the label, I brought my own with me tonight to keep me
sane. It’s comforting to hold something familiar before doing something that’s
the exact opposite.

I’m almost to the room when the same guy
wearing the headset from earlier stops me. “Are you Jen Elliott?”

“Yes.”

“There’s someone waiting for you in your
dressing room.”

Immediately my thoughts jump to Latson. “Thank
you.” I grin and pick up my pace. Maybe he was lying when he said he was two
time zones away. When I make it to the room, I expect to see him standing there
with his lopsided smile and open arms. Instead, who I see stops me dead in my
tracks.

“So.” Ariel Allyn flips her hair over one shoulder.
“You’re the one dating my ex.”

“Uh …” I stutter. I’m flustered by the famous
celebrity pop star standing in front of me.

“You know,” she turns toward the mirror and
checks her bright red lipstick, “Gunnar’s phone call surprised me. I didn’t
think he’d keep my number.”

Wait. “Latson called you?”

She nods and turns to me, then pulls at the top
of her strapless leather bustier. In fact, her entire outfit is leather. She’s
got the body to pull it off, too. She reminds me of Anne Hathaway when she
played Catwoman, but without the mask and ears.

“I don’t know who thought this was a good
idea,” she says as she adjusts her chest. “I’ve got more double-stick tape
going on than 3M.”

I suppress a laugh as her eyes comb over me.

“I’m jealous,” she continues. “You don’t have
to worry about flashing an arena.”

“True.” I take a few steps toward her. “But that
doesn’t mean I won’t find a way to embarrass myself.”

She gives me half a smile and starts to back
away from me. “Well, you’ve made it this far. You must’ve done a few things
right.” She turns around and reaches for a guitar case propped against the wall.
I don’t remember seeing it before.

“Whose is that?”

“Yours,” she says before placing it in my hands.
“It was delivered to me with strict instructions to make sure it got safely to
you.”

I’m confused. I take the case from her and set
it on the vanity in front of the mirrors. Popping the latches, I open the lid
to a familiar sight.

“No way,” I breathe as I stare at the Fender. It’s
Latson’s. The same guitar he let me play the night of Dean’s show. There’s a
folded piece of notebook paper tucked in the strings, and I wiggle it free.

So we can be on stage together.

She’s yours now. I know you’ll take good care
of her.

You’ve got this, Little Bird. Knock ‘em dead.

 – Latson

I’m speechless. His gift is unexpected and over
the top. Slowly, I run my fingers over the strings.

“Do you like it?” Ariel asks.

“Very much.”

“Then it looks like my job here is done. I’ll
leave you two to get acquainted.”

“Thank you.” I meet her eyes. “You didn’t have
to be Latson’s delivery service.”

She smiles. “He thought if he sent it to Dean
you might accidentally see it and ruin the surprise.”

“I don’t ruin surprises,” Dean’s voice sounds as
he enters the room. “Ariel. How in the hell are ya?”

She opens her arms wide and squeals. “C’mere! 
I need hugs!”

Dean wraps her tiny frame in his big arms. “Thank
you so much for this. We’ll make you look good, I promise.”

“No worries. When that Australian boy band canceled
I knew who I wanted to open for me.” She steps out of his embrace and hangs on
to his hands. “I’m so glad you’re here!  It’s almost like old times.”

As the two of them reconnect, Paul appears by
my side with his bass. “Hey. You want me to help you tune that thing?” His eyes
dart to the Fender.

“Yeah.” I lift it out of the case. I swear the
air around me changes the moment I slide the strap over my head. I position my
fingers on the strings and Paul strums an E. With his tone as a reference, I
strum the same note and then adjust the tuner. We go through all six strings
and play the beginning of our opening number for good measure.

“Sounds good,” Ariel says. “I’ll be watching
you guys.”  She starts to leave, but stops. “Oh, and I’ll see you after the
show. You’re coming, right?  Never mind. I just made it mandatory. I’m at the
Ritz. In the penthouse.” She gives us two thumbs up before disappearing out the
door.

“After party?” I ask the guys.

Drew stops doing push-ups and wags his eyebrows.
“Oh, yeah.”

Why is he on the floor?  “What are you doing?”

“Pre-show ritual,” he huffs. “Gotta get the
blood flowing.”

Good to know.

I run my hand over the smooth face of my new
guitar before I decide to give Latson a call. I want to let him know I got his
gift. It’s unbelievable, and he shouldn’t have done it. I no more than tap his
name on the phone when headset guy returns for a third time. He must get
exhausted running back and forth all night.

“D.U. The stage is ready when you are.”

I swallow and hang up.

“Okay.” Dean looks at us. “Ready?”

Drew gets to his feet, and Paul slams the last
of his Red Bull. They both walk toward Dean, so I do the same. We end up
standing in a circle, and Dean puts his fist in the middle. Paul follows suit
and so does Drew. I place my fist in last. It looks small next to the others.

“Tonight is the beginning of something I
thought I’d never see,” Dean says. “I wasn’t sure I’d set foot on a tour again,
let alone one this big. You all made that possible. We’ve put in the hours and
we’ve practiced our asses off. Now, there’s only one thing left to do.” He
looks each one of us in the eye. “Go out there and kill it.”

“Hell yeah!”  Paul pumps his fist in the air.

“Kill it!” Drew does the same.

“Let’s do this!” Dean says with the most
excitement I’ve ever seen from him. He high-fives me, and then we file out the
door.

When we get to the side of the stage, the place
is swarming with crew. They descend upon us, attaching receiver packs to the
backs of our clothing and helping us place our ear piece monitors. Dean and
Paul are given their guitars, and another crew member tries to hand me mine
until he sees the Fender in my hands.

“Change of plans?” he asks.

“Yes. Sorry. Is it a problem?”

“Nope. Here.” He hands me a few extra picks,
and I slide them into my back pocket. “You’re all set.”

I give him a nod of thanks and suddenly Roxanne
is in my face. “Nervous?”

“A little bit, yeah.”

“Well, snap out of it. You’re stepping on stage
in less time than it takes to pour a cup of coffee.”

My expression twists. “Gee. Thanks for the pep talk,
coach.”

She gives me the first genuine smile I’ve ever
received from her. “You don’t need any talk from me. I saw the effect you had
on that girl at the meet and greet. I don’t know what you said to her, but she
was grinning from ear to ear. I like it.” She leans closer. “Now go out there
and show the boys how it’s done.”

I’m starting to like Rox a little more now.

Drew walks on to the darkened stage and I go
with him. I find my place and plug into the sound system as he gets settled
behind his kit. Paul joins us, and my eyes catch the first arena audience I’ve
ever seen.

Now would be a good time to remember how to
breathe.

My hand clutches the neck of my guitar as I
stare. I can see the arena isn’t full by any means; however, a lot of people
have found their seats. Other concert-goers wander the aisles trying to find
their section and, closer to the stage, I see people returning to their friends
carrying plastic cups. Drew hits the bass drum a few times and does a quick
fill, testing the sound of his equipment. This gets the attention of the
audience and, realizing something is about to happen, a small cheer erupts. The
sound sends chills down my spine.

Paul gets my attention from across the stage. He
tests a few chords, and I respond back on the Fender. Satisfied with the sound
coming through the amps, he starts the bass line that will weave into our first
song. In this big space, with this many speakers, you can almost see the notes vibrate
through the air. On his cue, Drew jumps into the mix, pounding the drums in a
familiar rhythm. Each hit resonates deep in my chest and I close my eyes,
listening until the hair on the back of neck stands on end. It’s time for me to
add the hook.

Taking a deep breath, I think of Latson and his
faith in me. I think of Oliver, my brother, Jules, and everything that’s
brought me here. I open my eyes and see Dean standing at the side of the stage,
ready to make his entrance. I strike my first note.

And find absolute heaven.

~~~~

“Break free of the bonds

Break free of the chains

Own the blood

That runs through your veins

Love’s bigger than you

And it’s bigger than me

We’re breaking free, baby

We’re breaking free.”

I finish singing the chorus with Dean. “Breaking
Free” is the last song of our set. As the final notes of our instruments fade,
Dean sings the ending lines solo:

“There’s so much more out there to see

If love breaks one of us, let it be me.”

The crowd cheers as his voice drifts away.

“Thank you!” Dean says into the mic. He wipes
the sweat off his forehead with his arm. “We’ve had a great time with you
tonight, L.A. Now, who’s ready to see Ariel Allyn?” He puts his hand to his ear
and the crowd roars. He looks over his shoulder at us, grins, and faces the
audience once more. “That’s what we thought. It won’t be long now.”

He lifts one hand above his head in a wave, our
signal to join him at the front of the stage. The guys and I leave our places
to form a crooked line with him in the middle. Dean speaks, his voice echoing
through the speakers. “Thanks for a great show, Los Angeles!  We’ll see you all
again real soon.” I watch him take a small bow over his guitar and see Drew
wave his sticks in the air. Paul and I wave too, and I know my smile consumes
my face. So much adrenaline is pumping through my veins right now, I don’t know
what I’ll do to contain myself once we’re off stage.

Speaking of off stage, as we exit, I catch a
glimpse of Heidi and her friends near the front row. They’re being so loud
they’re impossible to miss. Heidi must catch me watching because she shuts up
for a second. I’m not close enough to see her eyes but I’m sure they’re
shooting daggers at me. It doesn’t matter. Nothing can ruin this high.

Nothing.

As soon as we’re out of sight, the crew
descends upon us again. We’re stripped of everything technical and electronic, and
even the Fender finds its case. I’m confused as to how it got backstage, but
I’m so geeked about the show I don’t care. People rush everywhere to transform
the stage for Ariel, and I realize I should get out of the way. Dean is talking
to Roxanne, so I start to head in that direction. Suddenly, strong arms wrap
around my waist, stopping and startling me.

“You blew me away out there.”

His voice melts over my skin, warm and soft
beneath my ear. I turn around and throw my arms around him. “You’re here!”

Latson grins before ducking his head to catch
my mouth with his. It’s a greedy kiss, one I’ve missed, and I pull him closer
by the back of his neck. He holds me tight, clutching my waist, as I press the
length of my body against his. “Surprise,” he says when we take a breath.

This night couldn’t get any better. “How long
have you been here?”

“Since we talked on the phone. I was in a cab
when you called.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I didn’t want to distract you. Dean needed
you focused.”

“He knew?”

“Who do you think sent me this?” He holds up a
backstage pass. “It pays to grow up with the lead singer.”

I look at the plastic and get hopeful. “Please
tell me that’s good for tomorrow, too.”

“Definitely. Oliver is staying with Mrs. Gibson
until you leave for Anaheim.”

I bounce up and down on my toes, then pull him
toward me and kiss him again. I get to keep him for two whole nights.

“So, how do you feel?” Latson searches my face.
“How was your first show?”

“It was …”  I can’t find words. I don’t think
anything I say will do the experience justice. “It consumed me.”

He gives me a gentle, knowing smile and brushes
his thumb across my cheek. “You were incredible.”

Dean appears beside us. “I see you found each
other.” He looks pointedly at me. “I promised you’d be together soon.”

“You did,” I say. “Thanks for delivering.”

“C’mon.” He waves us forward. “Let’s get out of
here.”

“Where are we going?”

“Up to the label’s private suite. Ariel said we
could watch her perform from there.”

He walks away and my jaw drops. I had hoped I
would get to see some of Ariel’s show, especially after being attacked by her
props.  I assumed if I did it would be from the television in the dressing room
or some other obscure location, not a suite. Excited, I start to follow Dean until
Latson takes my hand and stops me.