Maybe she’d been as stressed as I was this summer.
“Which is?”
“Who is going to be sitting with you at the wedding reception tomorrow?”
We’d never finalized the seating chart. Why hadn’t she asked me this before now?
Yet, in all honesty, what could I say?
“The truth is…” I hadn’t heard back from my invitee. I would most likely be alone for the wedding. But I didn’t want the bride to worry more when she had a lot on her mind. “I’m not sure.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
I tried to tell myself that it was okay that I attended Kellianne’s wedding solo.
After all, I was in charge of things like arranging my sister’s mile-long train when she was at the altar so that the custom-sewn inset of vintage Alençon lace showed to its best advantage. Then there were the last-minute hair repairs for the bride before the photos, the endless posing for those pictures, and patiently fielding comments from relatives about how “grown-up” I looked in my bridesmaid gown.
But no matter how practical it might have been to attend the wedding alone, I was hurt inside. Maybe the hollow feeling in my gut as the bridesmaids’ limo reached the reception hall was what I deserved after the way I’d played both Matt and Seth this summer. Not that I’d meant to.
I’d had good intentions about being there for Matt. About staying away from Seth until Matt and I were no longer together. Unfortunately, I hadn’t been able to separate my feelings for them any better than I’d been able to separate the old and the new me. They were both a part of the real me—the Lauren that was a nerd
and
a cheerleader, a wannabe astronomer with a Diva’s eye for fashion.
Too bad I’d hurt people I cared about to finally be okay with who I was inside.
Now, smoothing any wrinkles from my lavender chiffon Vera Wang custom dress, I blinked hard to banish any trace of tears. This was Kellianne’s big day, and I wasn’t going to let regrets about my camp boyfriends steal a moment of the bride’s happiness. She looked happy enough, but I still worried about her after our talk last night. I hoped she came to her senses and started voicing her needs instead of following everyone else’s expectations for her.
Guests poured into our country club for the reception as valets scurried to keep up with new arrivals. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t secretly scanning the vehicles in a futile hope for a late arrival. Forcing myself inside the banquet hall, I mingled with a few cousins while we all waited for the bride and groom’s big appearance.
“Congratulations, Lauren!” A meaty hand clapped me on the shoulder, and I turned to see an older gentleman who looked vaguely familiar in a dark blue suit with an American flag pinned to the lapel.
A distant uncle? A friend of my father’s?
“Thank you,” I said automatically, wondering if he’d somehow mistaken me for the bride. Since I was a brunette wearing lavender instead of a blonde in white, that didn’t seem too likely.
“Aren’t you going to ask me what for?” he teased, a big grin on his face, his polished white teeth standing out against very tanned skin.
Like a politician’s, I thought.
That’s when it hit me how I knew this guy. From TV and the paper. He was our local congressman, a friend of my grandfather’s.
“
Ohmigod
.” I let the comment slip out, unguarded. “You’re Representative Fawkes. Thank you so much for the letter of recommendation for the Aerospace program. I just sent you a thank-you note—”
“You’re welcome.” He took a glass of champagne off a passing waiter’s tray and gave the man orders to start sending over the folks with the hors d’oeuvres. Then Representative Fawkes leaned closer to me. “But I’m not congratulating you on
applying
, young lady.”
My head reeled. My knees felt weak. Could he be saying what I thought he was saying?
“Excuse me?”
“I talked to the folks over at the Aerospace Scholars program just this morning.” He took a sip of his champagne and I wondered if he was enjoying the suspense because it was definitely killing me. Then, with all the drama of a man who knew a thing or two about sound bites, he whispered, “You’re in.”
I couldn’t hold in the scream even though I bit my lip. It came out as more of a screech. I launched myself in his arms and hugged him, almost spilling his drink.
“Thank you!” I couldn’t wait to tell my dad. “Thank you so much.”
“It wasn’t
my
hard work that got you in,” he reminded me. “We need strong women to lead us into the future.” He patted me on the shoulder, still grinning, while he intercepted a waitress with a tray full of bacon-wrapped shrimp. “Make good use of this opportunity.”
“I will,” I promised, wishing I could share this news with Siobhan after the way she’d encouraged me to apply.
For that matter, Seth deserved some credit for reminding me to follow my dreams. Matt, too, would be so proud of me…
The ache in my chest returned with new bittersweetness. I wouldn’t be seeing any of them next summer, since the Aerospace Program would be my priority. I wouldn’t be going back to camp. I wondered if this hurt inside would go away by then.
Funny how some dreams came true at the same time old ones faded away.
“May I have your attention please?” The DJ’s voice came over the sound system just as the lights dimmed in the country club. “Ladies and gentlemen, I have some very special introductions to make.”
Knowing my sister must have arrived, I hurried to the back of the room to get ready for the DJ’s introduction of the bridal party. Kellianne and Andrew got to make their big entrance as husband and wife, and then they’d dance. Then, finally, we could all relax and eat.
Hopefully that would help ease the butterflies that had come out of nowhere. I shouldn’t have been nervous, but it had been such a roller coaster for the past few weeks. I saw my mom and dad gathered with the bridal party as the first bridesmaid and groomsman were called to the dance floor, but I didn’t say anything about my big news. This was Kellianne’s time.
“Where’s Kellianne?” I asked my mom, peering around the entrance to the restaurant.
“With Andrew,” she said vaguely, a big smile pinned to her face, as if that could erase the hint of worry in her eyes. “Around the corner, I think.”
My stomach cramped. They couldn’t seriously be having a disagreement two hours into their married life. Guilt swamped me for not hashing things out with Kellianne last night when she’d expressed some worries.
While the next bridesmaids were announced, I hurried toward the alcove my mom had indicated, a little lounge near the bathrooms. I hadn’t rounded the corner yet when I heard Andrew’s thick southern accent speaking softly.
“Honey, you know I just want you to be happy. You should take that job if you want it.”
And my sister’s voice answering him. “But what about your mom? You know she can’t wait for a grandbaby.”
“We’ll just keep reminding her she’s too young to be a grandma, okay?” He chuckled over that and something else he said—too low to overhear—made Kellianne laugh.
My heart melted as Andrew Buford III’s stock soared in my book.
“Maid of honor, Ms. Lauren Carlson,” the DJ’s voice suddenly boomed through the sound system as I was being announced “and best man Mr.—”
Crap.
I sprinted to the best man’s side and looped my hand through his arm for our entrance, but not before I gave my mother a thumbs-up so she would know everything was okay with Kellianne. Seeing my sister’s happily-ever-after come together so well made it a little easier to feel okay about not getting one for me. At least I had the Aerospace program.
I took my place off to one side of the dance floor with the other wedding attendants. We were supposed to wait there while Andrew and Kellianne took their first quick turn around the dance floor. Apparently it was a tradition in the Buford family to do this lone dance before dinner—an unorthodox practice that my mother had tried politely arguing about, but this was one arena where Andrew’s family got some say.
“And for the bride and groom’s first dance,” the DJ announced as a spotlight hovered on Andrew and Kellianne. “We have a special guest to serenade them with an original song.”
Special guest?
I hadn’t heard a word about this, and wondered if the Bufords had tried springing more last-minute surprises. But my mother’s face showed no hint of aggravation. In fact, she smiled at me. As did the bride.
Why where they looking at
me
?
Then the DJ continued, “Please welcome Matt Butler to sing to the new Mr. and Mrs. Buford!”
I didn’t fully comprehend that introduction until I heard the gorgeous strains of a melody I knew well even though I’d only heard it a few times before. It felt like I was in a dream as I eased away from the best man to see the source of the music.
In the shadows of the stage, off to one side, Matt sat at the piano, dressed flawlessly in a black tuxedo, his broad shoulders leaning forward over the keys.
“When the cold/ freezes you body and soul…”
His green eyes met mine in the slow, spinning squares of light filtered over the dance floor. While the rest of the room watched Andrew and Kellianne, Matt and I only had eyes for each other.
He came for me
.
I knew he would never be sitting here, singing in public for probably the first time in his life outside of camp, just because Kellianne wanted him to. No. If Matt was here, at this wedding that I’d asked him to attend with me, it was because he wanted to be here for me.
As my date. And—I hoped—my boyfriend.
“
When the sun falls/and the stars emerge
,” he sang, lifting his voice with lyrics that had never been about Hannah. I understood now that
Come Back and Be My Love
was about me.
Us.
The tears that had threatened earlier were falling now, and I didn’t even care. It was dark anyhow, and the only one who saw was Matt. Frankly, he deserved to see how much I cared. After he’d waited all summer for me to figure out what I wanted. After he’d eventually forgiven and even understood about me and Seth.
After he’d reached deep inside to write the most beautiful song I’d ever heard… Yeah, Matt Butler had earned the right to know how much his love touched me. How much I loved him back.
The notes swirled around me like the rose-colored lights, the music reaching out like a hug across the space between us.
“
The future’s certain/since you’ve opened my eyes/So won’t you be my love?/Come back and be my love
.” The final chords of the song died away, and Matt straightened back from the keys, his eyes still on me.
The room erupted in thunderous applause for the couple in the spotlight while I sought the man behind the music.
“Matt.” I put shaking hands on the piano as he rose from the bench. “That was amazing.”
The spotlight flashed over to him for a minute and the applause rose again. He took a bow, that dazzling smile of his winning over anyone in the crowd who wasn’t already in love with him. No matter that Matt had found his inner geek, he was still seriously hot. Nerd cool and geek chic. It was a sexy combination.
I was glad I saw a lot more than that in him, though.
“Sorry I’m late.” He turned toward me after taking the bow, his hand reaching out for mine. A half-grin kicked up one side of his face. “I thought I’d make an entrance.”
“You definitely accomplished that.” I took his hand while everyone else started taking their seats for the meal.
“Hey.” He frowned and put his arm around me. “You’re shaking like a leaf. Everything okay?”
“I thought you weren’t coming,” I confessed, tilting my head onto his shoulder. He felt so solid. So real.
“I wouldn’t miss it, Lauren. You worked so hard on this wedding all summer, even when you were supposed to be having fun with your friends.” He squeezed me and guided me toward a door that led outdoors where a few patio tables were set up for anyone wanting to catch some fresh air despite the heat. “Come on, we can take a minute to talk while they get seated.”
Looking back over my shoulder, I saw he was right. People who’d missed Kellianne and Andrew in the receiving line were swarming them now. Mom and Dad were talking to old friends. Dinner would be a while.
Following him outside, we could see Turtle Creek in the valley below the country club. Torches were already lit even though it wasn’t dark outside yet. A white canvas tent was set up with fans for outdoor dancing later.
“When I didn’t hear from you after camp, I thought maybe Hannah had finally convinced you…”
“No.” He shook his head. “Lauren, I’m crazy about you. I wouldn’t have been hanging out with Hannah at all except that she was always there any time I turned around this summer.” He shrugged. “She’s going through some tough stuff at home and I related, but when she started to think it meant more than friendship…”
“You don’t have to explain it to me.” I didn’t want to be the kind of couple that needed to question each other’s every conversation with someone of the opposite sex. “You trusted me plenty of times. I trust you, too.”
He smiled. “That feels really good. But I have a confession to make before you trust me too much.”
My heart fell. “What?”
“I talked to Seth on the bus to the airport after camp.”
“You’re kidding.” I couldn’t picture the two of them doing more than snarling at each other.
“No. And I’ll admit I asked him—you know—what his intentions were toward you.”
I rolled my eyes. “So you only trust me now that you believe Seth and I are really through?”
“Hell, no. Lauren, that guy will always be a little in love with you, and I’m going to have to live with that. But hearing him talk about you reminded me that I’d be a jerk to let stupid jealousy keep us apart.”
My eyes burned all over again. Because even though it was Matt that I loved, I had Seth to thank for pushing us together. Seth, who would always have a place in my heart too. But now I understood that it was as my friend.
“Seth and I were friends for a long time, and I hope someday we’ll be friends again.” Twilight was falling now, the sky turning purple in the west as a few fireflies lit the bushes nearby.