Camp Alien (39 page)

C
AMILLA, RAHMI,
and Rhee were there. Keith was supporting both princesses, but Camilla was standing on her own, though it looked like Daniel and Joshua were ready to catch her if she happened to fall. All three women looked seriously pissed.

“You guys okay?”

Camilla nodded. “No thanks to him.”

Turned back to the Kendroid. “We call this checkmate. What do you call it?”

He gaped. “How . . . how did you find them?” he asked White.

“It's amazing how distracted Missus Martini and the other young ladies made you,” White said. “The rest of us felt that we would be of more help putting our natural talents to use.” He smiled at me. “We searched the ship, found where everyone was being held, and released them. It wasn't as difficult as it could have been, since Daniel and Joshua had already examined the entire ship and had good suspicions as to where the animals would be. Once they were released, they led us to the chamber where Camilla, Rahmi, and Rhee were being held.”

The Field agents looked pissed. “They were in stasis for sure,” Joshua said. “No air, no water, no food, just frozen.”

“How are you guys doing?” I asked the women. “For real, this time.”

“We will be fine once we can avenge ourselves,” Rahmi said. Rhee nodded.

“I'm with the princesses,” Camilla said. “I assume you've figured things out?”

“Yeah, you guys have been gone for over a week. We've probably figured a lot of things out, but no guarantees that it's everything you know.” Looked at the Kendroid again. “Your ship is officially commandeered. Matt, do you guys know how to fly it by now?”

“Pretty sure we do, Commander,” Hughes said cheerfully.

“What heading do you want?” Jerry asked.

“Get us to Andrews on the double. Colonel Franklin has a nice parking place reserved for us.”

Hughes barked orders and the ship shuddered. The Kendroid was shuddering, too.

“You tricked me,” he said.

“No. I'm just better at salesmanship than you are.” My salesmanship professor and former boss would both have been proud of me right about now, since I'd used their techniques to the letter. “I gave you exactly what I said I would. I have five guys here flying this thing for you. I'm going to take you to Andrews, and you're going to get to go see Stephanie in her cell. Maybe they'll let you stay there with her.”

“Not that I'd think you'd want to,” Lizzie said. “Because we weren't making it up—she's cheating on you.”

“Because you're not a real person,” Mahin added.

The Kendroid again looked like he was ready to cry. “I'm real,” he said plaintively.

“No. You're not. I could possibly help you become more human, but you haven't given me a lot of reason to want to. However, if you do want to try to become a real boy, then I'll help you. As long as you come over to the good guy's side. You know Stephanie's wrong to be doing what she is.”

He was shaking even harder. “She might be wrong, but she's all I have.”

“You could have more,” Adriana said. “But you have to choose to want more.”

“I . . . I . . .” His face fell. “I can't. I can't change my programming.” He blinked several times in rapid succession, and my music changed to “I'm Blowin' Up” by Kool Moe Dee.

“You can fight it,” I said urgently. “Other androids have fought the self-destruct sequence, and you can, too.”

“I don't know how!”

Grabbed his hand. “Look at me and just focus on being you. Not your programming, on you, on the person, the being, you think you are. You're more than the programming someone else gave you. That's what being human is—being able to overcome your programming when you have to, when it's right to.”

The Kendroid stared at me for a few long moments while he continued blinking. Then he squeezed my hand, but not too hard. “Thank you for trying. But . . .” He shook his head, leaped over the railing, and ran off the way we'd come.

“Commander, he's heading for the same hatch we entered through,” Walker called.

“Open it.”

“Have grounds on viewer,” Joe said. Ran over to see what he had. We were pretty high up already, which was good for us if the Kendroid self-destructed. But only if he did so when he wasn't inside the ship.

“Android has left the ship,” Walker said, as we continued to rise up. “Hatch is closed and secure.”

Joe had a good view of the grounds and I watched the Kendroid avoid hitting any of the buildings and fall to the ground. He didn't explode. “Think he's dead?” Joe asked.

“No. Stay on him.”

Sure enough, as we rose up, I watched the Kendroid jerk and sort of bounce on the ground. Then it stopped. And, as we started forward, he stood up, looked up, and waved at us. Then he ran off, headed toward the main house and Adriana's motorcycle. Knew without asking that he could hot-wire and ride it.

“Do you think he knows you're watching him?” Joe asked.

“Yeah, I think he does.”

“What do you think he's going to do?” Randy asked.

Heaved a sigh. “I have no idea.” My music changed to “Home Tonight” by Aerosmith. “But I know what we're going to do. Whoever has external communications, contact Andrews and the White House. We're going home.”

Everyone cheered, Poofs and Peregrines, too. Even Keith.

At least we did until Jerry shouted over everyone else. “Commander, we have a situation!”

“W
ELL,
that success was short-lived.”

“So,” Abigail said, “you know, routine.”

“Yeah. Jerry, what's up?”

“Need you to confirm countersigns.” His voice was very tense. “They don't believe we're who I'm saying we are. I'm on with low-level at Andrews. They've supposedly hooked in someone at the White House, but I can't determine who. Whoever I'm talking to, they don't seem to know that American Centaurion or the Office of the President are missing any people, yourself included and in particular.”

“Fan-freaking-tastic. Everyone, see who you can reach on your phones. Guys, see who else you can reach via the ship's telecommunications.” Took my own advice and checked. I had bars. Called Jeff.

“Hello!” He sounded hearty and cheerful.

“Jeff, it's me—”

“You've reached Jeff Martini. I'm unavailable right now, but please leave a message and I or one of my team will get back to you as soon as possible.” The phone beeped. “Mailbox is full,” the automated female voice shared.

Stared at the phone. Hung up. Tried Chuckie. “Charles Reynolds, here.” He sounded all business and no nonsense.

“Chuckie—”

“I'm unavailable. Leave a message.” The phone beeped. “Mailbox is full,” the same automated female voice shared. Well, we were all on the same A-C Carrier System, so that made sense. Only that so far, but one thing was better than none.

Called Reader, Tim, and Mom. Got the same thing—hit their voicemails and couldn't leave a message.

“Kitty,” Abigail called, while I tried Buchanan, “no one's answering. I've tried Paul, Walter, Kevin, and Serene and all I get is voicemail with no way to leave a message. And I can't get a call through to my parents.” Same response from Buchanan's phone—no answer and the mailbox was full.

“I can't reach Doreen, or Raj, or Pierre,” Mahin said. “I tried William but I can't get the call to connect.”

“My wife's phone is the same,” Joe said darkly. “Voicemail and you can't leave a message. I tried my mother- and father-in-law, too, and Tito as well. Same thing.” Rahmi looked stricken and Rhee looked confused. Felt their pain.

“Mine, too,” Randy shared. “Wife and in-laws both. Along with the main Embassy phone. Same lack of anything. Nice to know they missed us.”

Camilla waved her phone. She looked pissed. “Can't reach anyone who matters, same thing as everyone else.”

“Like Mahin, I can't get through to Dulce,” Jerry said. “Not hitting voicemail, for which I guess we should all be thrilled, but literally can't connect to their number. Any of the Dulce numbers. That goes for all A-C Bases worldwide. Cannot connect.”

“Maybe we're still being dampened,” Abigail said.

“Or we have limited range for some reason. Guys, see if you can fiddle with our communications. Maybe we're blocking ourselves in some way.”

“I can't reach my dad,” Lizzie said. “And I tried your dad, too, Kitty. And Denise and Nadine.” She looked frightened. Well, that was a change from the adults who all looked as upset and angry as I felt. Abigail put her arm around Lizzie and hugged her.

Tried not to worry about the kids—mine and everyone else's. If we couldn't reach the Embassy, there could be a bad reason as to why. Tried Vance. Got nothing—couldn't connect to his line.

“Christopher's phone is the same—voicemail with no way to leave a message,” White said. “The same with Amy's. I've tried all other Embassy personnel, including Magdalena.” Since White and Nurse Carter were dating, this was the same for him as my calling Jeff. “I believe the phones
are all turned off. The quickness of both the answer and the send to voicemail is indicative.”

The others nodded. “Have tried all White House personnel we know that Chip, Jerry, Joe, Randy, and I have numbers for,” Hughes said.

“That's a lot of numbers,” Jerry added. “We're popular, or at least I thought we were. We know everyone.”

“Ship's telecommunications system says that Richard's determination is correct,” Walker shared. “It's not on our side. Phones appear to be turned off. Voicemail systems are either full or also turned off. There's a way to do it so that the system will give everyone a ‘mailbox full' response even if the mailboxes are empty.”

The Field teams were having the same luck as the rest of us. Keith, however, had a different issue. “My phone won't connect to anything or anyone.”

“He's not on our system,” Daniel added. “That might be why.”

“The A-C's system is stronger than the normal carriers'. I just tried Vance, who I don't think is on our system yet, and couldn't connect. So, if I'm understanding our situation correctly, we can reach most of the very people we want to reach, but they've set things up so that we can't actually reach them.”

“Or someone's hacked our system,” Mahin said.

“Hackers! Everyone try to reach Hacker International!”

“Tried that already,” Jerry said. “Same for them as all the others.”

“I've reached Grandmother!” We all turned to stare at Adriana, who started talking quickly in what I assumed was Romanian. Her look of elation changed to one of worry. “I understand. Yes. I love you, too.” She hung up. “Grandmother says that no one has hacked the phones. If the phones are off, they were turned off intentionally by the Office of the President, the Director of the CIA, or the Head of Field.”

We all stared at each other. “Wow,” I said finally. “I guess we know where we stand.”

“Grandmother is as unable to reach anyone as we are. The American Centaurion Embassy is in full lockdown—Romanian Embassy personnel were not able to contact
anyone, and were repelled away from the door, so were unable to knock or gain entry. Grandmother is concerned for us and suggests that we be prepared.”

“For what?” White asked.

Adriana swallowed. “To fight.”

“Commander, Adriana's not wrong. I've managed to stall while we wasted time trying to reach our loved ones who apparently don't miss us at all,” Jerry said. “But you need to get involved or we need to fly far, far away as fast as we can.”

Went to Jerry's station and put on the headset he gave me. “Hello, to whom do I have the pleasure of speaking?”

There was a pause. “Identify.”

“This again? You first. Jerry, did we get a name from those we're speaking to at Andrews and the White House?”

“Negative, Commander, and I did ask. We're supposedly on a conference call with both locations, however.”

“Super-duper. Jerry, make sure the others can hear this, just in case. To whoever's on the other end of this line, I have no idea what the password is when you've been kidnapped, then escape, save everyone else, and recapture the stolen invisible helicarrier, but whatever that password is, we're saying it.”

“We need proof of who you are.” Did not recognize the voice. This boded. “You are in a foreign craft above American soil. Identify or we will shoot you from the ground.”

“You decloaked us?” I asked the flyboys.

“Unintentionally,” Jerry said, voice tight. “It was closely connected to communications. If we'd been able to leave in a normal way, we would have been able to avoid decloaking.”

“And we're just learning these systems,” Walker reminded me.

“Fine, fine, these things happen. Look, whoever I'm talking to, I'm the First Lady. Kitty Katt-Martini. Also known as Cyclone to the Secret Service. Perhaps you've heard of me?”

There was a pause. “The First Lady is confirmed to be safe and not in an enemy helicarrier. Per the President of the United States.”

“Excuse me? I'm in the airship you're threatening.”

“Negative. The First Lady is on the White House Lawn,
with the President. Both confirmed by top-level White House staff and on the news right now. So, your plan to fool us isn't working.”

Randy waved me over. The headset was cordless so I went. Sure enough, he had a viewing screen up and it showed Jeff and “me” on the lawn, doing a photo op. Sure, it was Francine doing her Double Me Duty, and you could tell because she was far prettier than I was in real life. However, no one seemed to note this.

“According to the news, this is the President and First Lady announcing that the peace talks are back on and scheduled for three days from now,” Randy shared. “They were out earlier, too, a few hours ago, apparently to just sort of wave at reporters and announce that things were just peachy in the White House, but it was televised.”

“What the literal hell is going on?”

“You were kidnapped,” Camilla said quietly. “That's what Richard told us. Something must have happened to force a press conference, so they trotted your double out. But they clearly haven't told anyone on the front lines that the actual First Lady is really missing.”

Decided it was time to think hella fast. No one had come to rescue us, and we'd been at Forest Haven for hours. Meaning whatever scrambling had been put into effect had truly been exceptional. Drax's stuff had been good, after all, and we'd have never found him if not for Wruck. Chose not to ask where Wruck was right now.

Instead, focused on the here and now. It seemed clear that Jeff and everyone else either thought we were somewhere far, far away or were so hidden they couldn't find us. Or else they were glad we were gone. Yesterday I'd have scoffed at that option. Right now, however, it seemed very possible. Time to return to my call and see what I could salvage of this situation.

“Look, I realize that you think you're seeing the real FLOTUS, but I need you to tell the President, my husband, and the Director of the CIA, my best friend, that whatever intel they have is wrong. We're near some NSA black site, I think. We're literally less than an hour away from D.C.”

“Are you threatening enemy action against our capital?”

“Good lord, is Keith's twin on the other end of this line or something?”

“I resent that!”

“Not now, Keith. Look, I'm Wolverine and I'm trying to reach Nick Fury. Does that help?”

“Not at all.”

“I want to speak with the President, Jeff Martini, my husband, aka Cosmos.”

“You are not the First Lady and therefore not authorized to do so.”

“Really? Then give me the Director of the CIA, Charles Reynolds.”

“You are not authorized to do so.”

“How about Tom Curran, the Director of the FBI?” Didn't know Curran at all, but figured I'd have a better shot with him than whoever was holding down this fort.

“Again, you are not authorized. You are not authorized to speak to anyone other than me.”

“Who are you?”

“You are not authorized to know my name, rank, or serial number.”

“Of course not. Where is Rajnish Singh?”

“Nowhere you need to know about.”

“I want to talk to Colonel Arthur Franklin and I want to do so right now.”

“Identify. The President has protocols in place to determine if you are actually who you say you are. Meet those, or we will be forced to shoot you from the air.”

Camilla took a headset from Walker. “This is Agent Ninety-Nine.”

“Seriously?” Went over to where she was. Walker had type on his screens. Looked like he was trying to reach Hacker International via a method other than cellular. I approved.

Camilla shot me a look that said she'd heard all the jokes and had been sick of them before she'd heard them. She also tossed out some numbers and words and such so fast I couldn't catch them.

“Those protocols are old,” whoever was on the other end said. “Agent is not confirmed.”

Camilla looked shocked for what I suspected was the first time in her life. But she gave it the old college try. “Supersede protocols due to state of emergency. New protocols are sign countersign. Romeo.”

“Negative. You are not authorized.”

Camilla looked worried. “What did Jeff change while I was gone? And why?”

“I have no idea, but whoever we're talking to doesn't seem to think I've been kidnapped. Well, I was, most of us were. But we got better. Which is why we're trying to get to you there at Andrews.”

“Identify or we will shoot you from the sky.”

“Oh, my God.” Had nothing else. Went with the things that worked best—the crazy and channeling my mother. “I am the wife of the President of the United States, and the daughter of the Head of the P.T.C.U. and you
will
put me on with one of those two people immediately or I will personally come down there, kick your ass into the Atlantic Ocean, and then ensure that you do the rest of your active duty in Siberia using our nice exchange program with Russia. Do I make myself clear?”

“You're clear, but we still need identification.”