Burning Bright (10 page)

Ramsay shook his head and turned away from her so she couldn’t see his expression. She clenched her fists. This was so
stupid
, this assumption that because she was a woman, her virtue was irreparably stained the moment she was alone with a man not related to her anywhere but the drawing room of her own home. She felt like burning something, anything to give relief to her pent-up frustration and anxiety and fear, but she did not want to appear ungoverned and dangerous in front of this man.

Finally, Ramsay looked back at her, his expression as calm as if she weren’t an impediment to him, which she was certain she was. “If that’s your decision, Miss Pembroke…well, I suppose it doesn’t matter so long as we can conceal your presence. We will set sail around noon, and I’ll ask you to keep to these quarters until we are underway.”

Elinor nodded. Ramsay looked as if he wanted to say more, shook his head, and went to take the short sword off the wall. He strapped it to his waist, picked up his hat, and said, “
Athena
is the newest design for frigates—the captain’s quarters have a little more space, so we’ll be able to accommodate you nicely. This is the great cabin. Please feel free to make use of it whenever you want. I keep a few books in that cabinet you’re welcome to.”

He slid open a panel Elinor had thought was a wall, revealing a tiny space containing a bench with a hole in it. “The quarter gallery. The, ah, sanitary facilities,” he clarified when she looked at him in confusion. “We call it the head. And over here is where you will sleep.” He opened the second door to reveal another tiny chamber mostly filled with a strange, boxy-looking bed. Ramsay Moved the narrow, long chest sitting on the bed, making it rock, and lifted the chest to shoulder height.

“But…this is your bedroom,” Elinor said, looking at the chest.

“Not anymore. Now it’s yours.”

“I cannot take your room, Captain.”

Ramsay removed his hat and turned his full gaze upon her. “Miss Pembroke,” he said, “I could hardly call myself a gentleman if I didn’t see to your comfort. I’ll be bunking out here. Don’t trouble yourself on my account.”

“But—”

“The First Lord put you under my command, yes? Then I’m making this a command. I’ll return shortly.” He put his hat back on and was out the door before Elinor could protest further.

She gave the bed a little shove—it was mounted in a way that made it sway at her touch—and went back to the great cabin to look out the windows. They provided her with a view of the river traffic headed into London or toward the sea. Not all the ships had sails; some were propelled by oars, a few near the shore by long poles, but mostly it was sails as far as she could see in both directions. She imagined what it would be like to look out these windows and see nothing but water, and she shuddered, excited and terrified by the thought.

The room Ramsay had indicated she was to sleep in was little more than a windowless cubby illuminated only by one of those orange-tinged lamps. She wondered what other frigates were like, if this were representative of “more space.” At least the bed wasn’t a hammock, even if it did move alarmingly like one.

Two of the sailors brought her trunk into the room, and she unnecessarily tidied its contents when they were gone, reflecting on how strange it felt to wear only a boned chemise and shift rather than stays, which she had left behind knowing she would be unable to don them without assistance. She smoothed the wrinkles from her favorite evening gown, white rose-figured gauze over pink silk, then hung it on a peg in the narrow cupboard; she had no idea when she would wear it, but she hadn’t been able to bear the thought of Amelia snatching it up as she was certain to do with the rest of Elinor’s wardrobe, once it became clear she was not returning. Never mind that she wouldn’t be able to wear any of it; Amelia could never bear anyone having the advantage of her.

She returned to the great cabin and took a turn around the room. The wall into which the door was set appeared impermanent, as if it were designed to be removed, though why that should be necessary she had no idea. She looked out the windows, then sat on one of the couches. There was another sliding door on the opposite side of the room to the head, and before she could contain herself, curiosity drove her to open it.

The space beyond, matching the size and shape of the head, would have been small even if it hadn’t held Ramsay’s chest and a neat bundle of fabric hanging from the ceiling. She pushed on it and watched it sway; so this was what a hammock looked like when it was not in use. Windows looked out across the Thames toward the ship under construction, filling the little room with light. She slid the door shut and then took a few startled steps backward as the cabin door opened and Ramsay entered. Elinor quickly turned away, her cheeks red. “Will you show me how to work the windows, Captain?” she asked to cover her confusion.

Ramsay showed her how to turn the latch and prop the windows out of the way. “Keep them closed during heavy weather, obviously,” he said, then gestured for her to take a seat on the sofa. “We have a few things to discuss, you and I.”

Elinor took a seat and crossed her hands neatly on her knees, and waited for him to speak. He looked at her as if he expected her to say something, then shrugged.

“Sailors can be superstitious about women on board, though it’s not that uncommon an occurrence,” he began, “and they are terrified of fire. Getting the ships to accept Scorchers on board has been a battle, especially since none of them have your ability to contain fire. On the other hand, sailors are also superstitious about Extraordinary talents, in a good way—they see them as a sort of divine providence. So between the two of us and Peregrine Hays, the surgeon, that should offset their fears. Somewhat.”

“You’re an Extraordinary?”

He nodded. “Mover.”

“You can
fly
?”

His lips twitched in a fleeting smile. “That’s the definition of an Extraordinary Mover, Miss Pembroke.”

“I’ve never known an Extraordinary Mover before.”

“Well, I’d never met an Extraordinary Scorcher before, though I gather no one in England has in a century.”

Elinor flushed. “According to my father,” she said in a low voice. She knew she sounded resentful, but if he noticed, Ramsay didn’t react.

“At any rate, you should be prepared for some of the crew, and possibly some of the officers, to steer wide of you and make warding signs in your direction. As long as they don’t grow abusive, you should ignore that behavior. I think a few victories in which they can see your talent directed against the enemy should make them less antagonistic.”

“I will do my best not to give them cause for resentment.”

“Let’s hope that makes a difference. You’re not to wander beyond the captain’s quarters and the quarterdeck. I’ll show you exactly what that means when we’re underway. The men don’t need you intruding on their space. They’re good men, at least most of them are, and they know I expect them to behave honorably, but you have an ambiguous status here, and I can’t guarantee some of them won’t be stupid enough to offer you insult. You’re free to defend yourself, but I don’t want you offering provocation.”

Elinor was annoyed at his implication that
she
might be the one causing trouble, but decided not to challenge him.

Ramsay went on, “I will have one of the midshipmen instruct you on ship’s rules and regulations, mainly so you won’t get in anyone’s way, though you will be expected to obey the rules that apply to someone in your position. If I give you an order, you follow it. If one of the officers tells you to move, you move. But I will be the one directing your attacks, when the time comes. You will eat with me and my officers, and dinner is as formal an occasion as we can make it, though judging by what you’re wearing now you’ll look more formal than the rest of us. Any questions?”

“Yes,” Elinor said, her irritation getting the better of her at last. “Will your antagonism interfere with the performance of my duties here on your ship?”

He looked surprised. “I don’t feel any antagonism toward you.”

“You are certainly giving an excellent impression of a man faced with an insurmountable annoyance.”

Ramsay closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath, then released it slowly. “Miss Pembroke,” he said, his eyes still closed, “your presence here causes me some difficulties, it’s true. This ship is embarking on its maiden voyage, half the crew and a third of my officers have never sailed with me before, and the Atlantic journey isn’t the easiest to make.”

He opened his eyes, and again she was startled at how blue they were. “I’m not happy about having to explain your presence and then deal with the consequences while I am, at the same time, trying to integrate over one hundred men who don’t know me into my crew. And you are a civilian, and civilians make trouble simply because they don’t understand what life on a Royal Navy vessel is like—and before you come over haughty at me again, I believe you will do your best not to be a problem, but you’ll make honest mistakes that will still cause trouble. But I also think your talent will be invaluable in this fight, so I’m willing to face all those potential problems for its sake. I just don’t think it’s reasonable for you to expect me to be happy about doing so.”

“I…think I understand, Captain. I wish there were a way to do this without so many problems.”

“If that were possible, this wouldn’t be the Royal Navy.” His lips twitched in that faint smile again, making Elinor wonder if he were even capable of stretching his lips wide enough for a real one. “We will meet with my officers in the great cabin in about an hour, when they’re all aboard. You’ll hear two bells—two bells of the forenoon watch; you should probably start becoming accustomed to our timekeeping aboard ship. I think it’s fair to tell the officers what’s happening before the rest of the crew knows. And, Miss Pembroke… for what it’s worth, all things considered, I’m glad to have you on board.”

He nodded to her and left the room before she could think of a suitable reply.
That
was at odds with his demeanor and his lecture to her about proper behavior. For a moment, he had been much more like the man she had met in the Ormerods’ music room. Remembering that meeting still made her blush, though she didn’t know why; he certainly hadn’t behaved as if her rudeness had affected him at all.

She went to lean against the windowsill and watched the ships pass by in the distance. A few hours, and
Athena
would join them, and it would be too late to abandon this course. That would not matter; she already knew she would not turn back.

In which Elinor has a small problem, which leads to a larger problem

linor slid the door to the head closed and leaned against it. Well. This was certainly something she should have come prepared for, and having been caught unprepared, she felt embarrassed and foolish and angry all at once. What was she to do? Her wardrobe was not large enough that she could afford to use one of her shifts for rags. She would have to ask someone for help, but the thought only deepened her mortification.

After three days at sea, she barely knew enough to put names to faces. First Lieutenant Beaumont was polite but impossibly distant; Lieutenant Livingston, who’d “welcomed” her aboard, continued barely civil; Lieutenant Fitzgerald was awkward and bumbling in her presence. The midshipmen pretended not to notice her. The assortment of men who held positions somewhat lower than the commissioned officers but a good deal higher than the crew baffled her, the officers’ servants avoided her, and as to the crew… after hearing someone, in a none-too-low voice, refer to her as “the captain’s bit of muslin” a second time, she had not needed Ramsay’s warning to stay away from their territory, much as she longed to visit the place where the livestock were kept below.