Burn (20 page)

I can feel his lips. Hear him tell me that it’s going to be all right, just
breathe
. He restrains the sweet ache in my chest to kiss him. It’s a temptation beyond understanding.

***

In the morning I tell Mom I can’t go to church, that I’m too tired from working the late shift. Truth is, my wearied body doesn’t compare to the Mack truck Logan drove over my emotions last night. It is heartache in acres, trying to imagine my days without Logan.

I fish out Chloe’s diary from my underwear drawer and land back on the bed in a heap.

August 14
^th
,

Last time I embarrass myself with a boy. Ever. I’ve never felt so insecure, immobilized with grief over the way Gage made me feel when he shut me down. Gage said his mystery girl would sail into town soon. I’ll be sure to pull out the welcome mat, make her feel like she’s my new best friend before I accidently knock her off Devil’s Peak. Oops! People are prone to drinking too much around here and accidents happen.

August 15
^th
,

Perfect night!
Carly
had a party. Lame as usual. Of course she asked about Brody one zillion times until I finally made something up about him seeing Zoe
Topherman
. It was priceless to see
Carly
take off crying upstairs during her own get together. To top it off, Zoe has hair that covers her body like an ape, so of course this really pissed off miss tan and beautiful. It must hurt to think
you’ve been replaced by a circus animal, sort of like it hurts to be replaced by the invisible woman
. For all I know she might be a figment of his imagination—wishful thinking.

Anyway, Gage was there, stringing me along with one of his “discussions”. I let him fill me in on how
Nevermore
was doing. I wish I
would have
cut a little deeper when I plunged that knife into his hand—impaled him two or three times, severed an artery. You should have seen his face drop like a brick when I stopped listening midsentence and went over to talk to Logan. With Michelle and
Lex
both on vacation, this won’t even be a challenge.

August 16
^th
,

I picked up Logan and we went to the south side today over by Rockaway Point. I told him I forgot my bathing suit and stripped down to nothing right in front of him. I swear he’s just like Gage. He didn’t even try to make a move. He just acted like I was fully clothed and we went out swimming like it was no big deal. There’s obviously something wrong with the both of them.

August 17
^th
,

Ellis is driving me insane with these constant midnight visits, not that I’m turning him away. Besides we go light driving after and do fun things like change test scores at school and mess around with Dr. Oliver’s corpses. He suggested I mess with Gage, but I have something bigger planned. It involves his BFF Logan Oliver. It is a thing of beauty I tell you.
 
 

August 21
^st
,

Look at me. I can’t keep you up on things for two days straight. I guess it’s not a secret that I have a hard time being faithful. I finally got Logan to kiss me!
Turns out there’s
no invisible girl in his future. Well, Logan doesn’t have the curse of ‘knowing’ so we’ll go with the idea that I’m the girl of his dreams. Besides, he’s sweet. I like the way he takes up my hand and kisses it.

His aunt and uncle are buying them both trucks. Can you believe it? They are so spoiled rotten. I’ll be driving around in that beat up old hatchback for the rest of my natural life and they get brand new wheels right out the gate.

August 22
^nd
,

I think Logan is in love with me. Tonight at the bowling alley I thought Gage was going to piss his pants when he saw Logan and me sucking face for like five minutes straight. Of course, he wasn’t the only one having a seizure over the situation,
Lexy
and Michelle freaked out on me, like I was caught lighting their hair on fire. It’s every girl for
herself
. Don’t they know that already?

August 23
^rd
,

Shit hit the fan! Had an encounter with a full-blown army of
Fems
and I thought I was a goner. Thank God my dad came around and helped me get away. He broke his arm in two places and was in surgery getting pins put in this afternoon. Dad says he doesn’t know what they want or what we did to cause this sort of trouble in our lives. Mom thinks we should move, but Dad says they’ll just follow us wherever we go. They wanted to know if I did anything to piss off the Counts. I kept my lips shut tight. Good thing dead men (or should I say dead girls) tell no tales. Too bad their brothers do—or threaten to anyway. Maybe I should slaughter their whole family and put myself out of my misery.

There’s something to think about.
 

August 24
^th
,

After cheer practice I got in a knock down drag out fight with
Lex
, trying to get her to tell me how to bind a Fem. I’m afraid my entire family is going to die if she doesn’t spit it out soon.

I bashed her head into my locker so hard it left a dent (my locker not her head). She did get a nasty cut that bled profusely and ruined both our uniforms. Hopefully lockjaw will set in, or she’ll hemorrhage internally in her sleep, because she won’t tell me a thing. She said she’d die before she did that. I might take her to the mat on that one.
 
 

August 25
^th
,

I love that Logan is a
Celestra
.
For a long time I thought he was this stuck-up pretty boy, but he’s actually really nice, and kind of shy and quiet.
I told him what happened with the
Fems
and he GAVE me his grandmother’s pendant to protect me. I don’t think anyone has ever been so kind to me before.

 
I wish I could get over Gage.
Carly
swooped in now that Brody and her broke up. OK, I might have had something to do with that, but how was I supposed to know I’d push
Carly
-let’s-have-a-baby-Foster into Gage’s arms? Anyway. I asked him if we could get together and talk sometime. I’m hoping there’s still a chance for us.
    

August 27
^th
,

Met up with Gage yesterday after practice and just hung out on the senior lawn. We talked for hours. I finally broke down and told him about how I felt, about how scared I was because of what’s been happening with Ms. Richards’ grandmother—how I’ve been seeing her everywhere like a ghost, how she feels so real to me. I think I’m going insane. She actually spoke to me and said it was ‘almost time’. Almost time for what?

 
I feel like I’m losing my mind. Maybe I should go back to Dr. Booth? Obviously giving the
Ceslestra
files to Holden was a mistake. Maybe telling them they could taste my blood and see how strong it makes them, or how they could read minds and time travel if only for a moment, wasn’t the most brilliant idea in order to save my freaking ass. I’ll be paying for her death the rest of my natural life. They made me an offer I couldn’t refuse, pinned me to a wall and now I’m just fucked.

Oh and have I mentioned I lost Logan’s necklace again? Welcome to my wonderful life.
    

I wonder what kind of deal Holden made with Chloe? She said
them
—I bet his brother knew all about it. What the hell were they doing with
Celestra
files? Don’t the Counts keep track of us anyway? Unless Holden and Pierce were going off on their own, starting their own demonic junior council, with no rules, and no backwards code of ethics.

I touch the top of my neck, still swollen and bruised. I wonder what kind of an offer they made her? What could possibly make Chloe whore out her blood to them? And
who
the hell did she kill?

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Calling All Angels

“What kind of company meeting?” Tad balks when I tell him and Mom that I’m going out for a few hours and why.

“I don’t know. Logan wants to talk to the staff. It’s like a production meeting or something. He’s buying dinner, so I didn’t ask too many questions.” Actually I don’t know if we’re even having dinner. Besides, I can’t eat knowing Logan doesn’t feel we should be together anymore. The only bright spot in my day is that he’ll be at the faction meeting tonight.

A light knock erupts at the door.

“That’s for me.” I head towards the door with both Mom and Tad hot on my heels.

“Ready?” Gage offers a private smile before saying hello to the two of them.

“So where is this meeting?” Tad cranes his neck looking down the driveway.

Gage presses his lips together. I can tell he’s shocked that I might have said anything about the faction meeting.

“At the bowling alley,” I say, picking up Gage by the hand and heading into the frigid night air before things get too involved. The last thing I want is to drag Gage into my bed of lies.

“Your friend has a nice ride.” Tad ticks his head down towards Logan sitting in the orange beat-up mustang.

“That’s actually
Skyla’s
ride,” Gage says, as we move down towards the driveway.

“That’s the car they want to give you?” Tad rushes past Gage and trots down the stairs to get a better look. “That’s a 66 mustang!” He slaps the sides of his heavily pleated chinos. “
Lizbeth
!” He motions for my mother to come down in her bathrobe.

Logan gets out from the driver’s seat and politely says hello.

Tad ignores him. He’s too busy asking Gage faux permission before popping up the hood.

“It’s got a 289!” Tad’s voice echoes through the forest like a boomerang. “Shit!” He smacks his head on the inside of the hood before backing up. “What the hell are you thinking giving her a car like this?”

“I’m going to pay for it,” I offer.

“We’re working something out.” Logan looks back at me and relaxes into a smile.

It crushes me—everything around me stops as our eyes linger. All of the madness of Tad and his bizarre commotion, my mother’s bare breast nearly exposed, the fact Drake has appeared and is pulling at his hair like a cartoon character, none of it fazes me.

Logan gets behind the wheel, while Gage and I banter about who’s going to sit in the back, but I insist.

I take Logan in, as we head out on the road—drink him down like water. His long muscular arms, his chiseled to perfection features, the strong assurance he exudes without having to say a word, and my heart shatters like glass over and over until it’s ground down, fine as sand.