Broken In Pieces: Billionaire Stepbrother Romance (Wounded Hearts Book 1) (23 page)

By the time I was ten, Maddie was constantly strung out. She was high as hell most days and if she wasn’t, she was having withdrawals. It was during this time that she came damn close to overdosing for the first time. I came home one night and she was out cold. Her breathing was shallow and she barely had a pulse. I finally got her to open her eyes then I just kept her moving. I knew that if I could keep her conscious, she would be okay. We walked the apartment floors for what seemed like forever. By morning, I knew she was going to survive but she was sick.

She stayed in bed the next couple of days but started going through DT’s. She begged me to help her, to get her some pills. I refused at first but she was in pitiful shape by the next day. I couldn’t stand seeing her that way, so I did it. I bought pills for her for the first time and I hated myself for it. I just didn’t know what else to do. When she started feeling better, I told her that I would never do that again. She apologized and swore she would never ask it of me again.

That was the day I decided to ask her about my father. I don’t know why I had never asked before and she had never mentioned him, not even in passing. She told me that my father had died in a car accident just before she found out she was pregnant. He never even knew about me. She told me the story of a wonderful, caring, brilliant young man who she said would have absolutely loved me with all his being.

Wow, I thought Carter was Blades father. I’m so confused. Blade had lived such a difficult life and now, he finds out his father never even knew about him before his death. I’m even more pissed at the selfish bitch his mother was. As I run my hands over my face, there’s a bit of a sting and I realize I’ve been in the sun a bit too long. I gather Blade’s writings and head in for lunch.

Donna is already in the kitchen preparing some sandwiches for us. “Must be an intriguing story, ya haven’t moved since breakfast,” she smiles.

“I love getting to know him but it’s sad and horrific at times,” I frown as tears begin to well in my eyes.

“No one said this would be easy, Sher. The most wonderful part of all this is that he’s willing to do whatever it takes to keep you in his life. He loves you,” she sits a plate in front of me. I know she’s right, he’s putting himself out there more than he probably ever has.

When lunch is over, I retreat to my room. I lay back on the bed, almost dreading continuing his story. It’s beginning to feel like I’m intruding on the most private parts of him…that’s not what I wanted. As I’m thinking, sleep claims me and the dreams about a little boy with raven hair begin…dreams that end up nightmares. I awake out of the nightmare suddenly but with a realization. I’m not intruding, he has invited me in.

I pick up the journal and begin reading again:

Somehow after hearing about my father, I felt completely cheated. I was mad at the world for a long time. Sometimes I would lie in my bed at night and think about how different my life might have been if my father had lived. How different Maddie’s life might have been. I wondered if we would have had a nice home with a back yard. Would we have had plenty of food and would all our bills be paid? I was quite sure Maddie wouldn’t be a pill whore and I wouldn’t be a street thug. Yeah…I felt cheated as fuck.

Over the next few years, Maddie overdosed three or four more times. Each time I would find her just in time to bring her back from the edge of death. A young woman in our building had befriended us and I had come to trust her completely so I would ask her to help me each time. Shelley would stay with us the entire time, until she was sure Maddie was okay. Shelley was stable, unlike Maddie. She worked and went to college full time. She said she wanted better than what her life was at the time but she never judged Maddie, or me for that matter. She was just always willing to help.

When I was fourteen, I came home to find Maddie lying on the stairs that led to our apartment. I had no idea how long she had been there but I knew she wasn’t breathing, she didn’t have a pulse and she was cold. I ran to Shelley’s apartment for help but she wasn’t there. I tried everything I knew to bring her back but she never responded. I sat on the stairs beside her lifeless body, crying for an hour. Then it hit me that with Maddie dead, social services would come for me and I wasn’t going down that road.

I ran as fast as I could to Belli’s place. I told him about Maddie and how I wasn’t hanging around for social services. Belli calmed me down, gave me something to eat and put me up in his back room for the night. I cried myself to sleep that night wondering what I could have done differently. I hadn’t saved her at all, I was no angel.

I found out the next day that Belli had called the cops and reported seeing a woman on the stairway in our building. He said even she deserved at least that. Belli was no fan of Maddie’s and he didn’t hide it. He always said I deserved better than a pill whore mother.

The local paper had a small story, near the back, about the overdosed prostitute who had been found. It mentioned me and how I was nowhere to be found. No one ever came looking for me though. No one cared. She was also listed in the obituaries but there were no service times or real details. It didn’t matter, I couldn’t attend anyway. Someone would be sure to see me and I couldn’t take that chance.

A couple of weeks later, I returned to the apartment building looking for Shelley. She had moved and no one seemed to know where. All of our belongings, not that there were that many, were boxed up and left out for the trash. I found the necklace Maddie still kept from my father and I still have it to this day. It’s the only thing I have left of her besides memories and some of those, I wish I could forget.

This takes us to my teen years, which is a story for tomorrow. Please remember that no matter where I have been or what I’ve done, I love you with my whole heart and soul.

All My Love,

Blade

Holy Christ!!
This is like reading about someone I’ve never met. A little boy, all alone in this world, doing everything he can to survive and to save his mother. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. Mothers are supposed to save their children. I can tell he deeply loved her but at this point, I fucking hate the rotten bitch. A rotten bitch that he never even got to say goodbye to, a father who never knew about him…..these thoughts flood my brain as sleep comes again.

I wake to Blade and Donna’s voices coming from the living room. I quickly tuck the letter away in my nightstand and place the journal on Blades. I rush through the door to greet him as I catch a glance of Donna heading for the kitchen. I stop in my tracks, staring at him in awe. This wonderful, beautiful, maddening man has overcome so much in his life.

I run to him so hard that I almost knock him over as I throw my arms around his neck. I groan in pain but I don’t let go. He wraps his arms around me, “Careful baby girl. You’re in no shape for tackle football yet.”

A giggle escapes my lips as I whisper in his ear, “Thank you. Thank you for sharing yourself with me.”

He hugs me even tighter and whispers, “I love you, baby girl, with all my heart.”

The evening goes by way too fast. I can’t seem to get enough of him….his words, his smile, his little affectionate touches. At bedtime, we take our usual places, “Hold me, please.”

He rests his head on his hand, leans over and locks eyes with me, “Are you sure, baby girl?” My eyes never leave his as I nod yes. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into that spot. The world fades as sleep takes its hold.

Enlightenment

W
hen I wake,
Blade has already left for the office again. The journal is back on his pillow.
How did he get time to write? I was with him every minute.
He must have done this while I slept. Usually, I would wake at any movement he made but since coming home, I sleep deeper than I ever have. I assume it’s something to do with my body healing.

I decide to join Donna and Styx, in the kitchen, for breakfast before I begin reading. It’s time I get back to some type of normalcy. The three of us enjoy each other’s company as we eat. “Sis, we have to get you healed up. The band needs you,” Styx announces.

I’m confused, “Me? Why? I told you that you could use the song.”

“Yes and we really appreciate it but we need to get you into some meetings. Lots of paperwork to be done to get you paid for the song, set up royalties, that kind of thing. We’ve discussed it and we want you to work on writing songs with us and for the band,” he grins.

“Wow, really?!” I’m so excited. Music has always been special to me and to get to share it with these great people is more than I could ever imagine.

“So, you in?” he asks.

“Hell yeah, I’m in,” I squeal.

After breakfast, I return to my bedroom where Blade’s journal awaits me. Yesterday was horrifically enlightening but I’m thankful for the opening it has created. I had begun to shut Blade completely out. I thought I needed to in order to protect myself. I know his words may not be pleasant today but I need them, I need to understand him. I open the book and begin to read again.

MY TEEN YEARS

After Maddie’s death, Belli gave me a place to sleep and some extra work to get me through. But within two months, someone had snitched and the cops rocked his world. They ceased all his properties and bank accounts then threw his ass in jail. He refused to roll over on anyone so he was going to have to serve at least four years of his sentence. For me, this meant I was on my own. Sleeping where I could and stealing what I needed. Belli helped, through his men, as much as he could but he still had to lay low.

When I was fifteen, I met Caroline. I went into an abandoned building to sleep, the same building she held you in. She’d been staying there at night for quite some time. Over the next few years, we talked a lot and became close friends even though she was older than me. Caroline was twenty four and running from an abusive husband. Every so often, he would pop back up, insisting she was his. She didn’t have any money to run any further so she would have to reinvent herself, different hair and different name, change her movements, etc.

Belli was in prison but he still had long arms. I explained her situation to him through one of his men. Belli issued the order and a couple of his thugs paid her husband a visit. Needless to say, the husband never showed his face again. Later, when my life was straightened out, I helped her get her divorce and gave her a good job. I owed it to her then. She had taken care of me like a mother when I was on the streets.

I never saw any signs of the Caroline she had become when she kidnapped you. She was always kind and caring. She was very interested in my life and always involved but I thought that was because of the motherly thing. I had no idea she was delusional and obsessed with me for all those years. The red lipstick should have been a clue to me but I had forgotten her fascination with it. She stole more red lipstick than food.

Just before I turned eighteen, Belli got out on parole. One of the first things he did was send for me. When I walked in his door, he took one look at me and starting shaking his head. He said…. “You look like a damned ragamuffin, boy”. I explained how hard it had been and all he wanted to know was had I stayed in school. I was embarrassed to tell him no but there was no way around it, I hadn’t.

Belli made me another deal. If I would get my GED, he’d help set me up in business…legitimate business. He said that’s where I would excel because of the way my mind worked. He wasn’t a stupid man, he had properties in various names and money stashed that even the feds hadn’t found. I think Belli knew then that he was sick and wouldn’t be around long so he was making sure I could take care of myself.

A month later, I turned eighteen and a month after that I got my GED. Belli put up the money for my first house and property. Me and some of the other street thugs, from the neighborhood, worked our asses off fixing it up. When I flipped it, I could pay Belli back, pay the guys that helped me and buy my next piece of property. Some of those same men work for me still today.

Belli advised me for the next two years, up until his cancer took him. I had probably been closer to Belli than anyone else in my life, even Maddie. His death devastated me and I stayed drunk for a solid month. Then, one night I had a dream…it was almost like a vision or maybe it was just the alcohol but it brought me out of my grief. I dreamt that Belli came back to see me and he wasn’t happy. He grabbed me, shook the shit out of me and asked me if I had decided to piss my life away, the same way my mother had. The next day, I sobered up, cleaned up and wised up. I didn’t want to end up that way and Belli had so much confidence in me, I didn’t want to let him down.

A few weeks later, Belli’s lawyer sent for me. Belli had left me three of his properties and a large sum of money. The lawyer said he hadn’t informed me earlier because Belli had put stipulations in the will. One of them being that if I turned back to my old ways, I got nothing. Belli told him to keep an eye on me, give me a few months and see how I conducted myself. After that, I was pretty much golden. Things started happening fast and by the time I was twenty-five, Hawthorne Heights was born.

When I was twenty-six, I found out that what Maddie told me about my dad dying in a car accident wasn’t true. Shelley and Maddie had gotten even closer than I realized so Maddie had confided in her. I think Maddie knew that her demons were going to take her one day and she didn’t want the truth to die with her. When she confided in Shelley, Maddie gave her a letter she had written for my father and a letter she had written for me. She told Shelley if anything ever happened to her to make sure we got those letters.

My running from social services and her moving shortly after Maddie’s death didn’t leave Shelley a whole lot of options of getting my letter to me. Maddie had given her all kinds of information about my dad so she used it to track him down. It was easier to find someone who wasn’t trying to hide. About a year later, she found Carter. She sent both letters to him with a letter of explanation from her.