Bringing Home Danny (23 page)

“
He was pretty
scared. I thin
k something happened to him, something he doesn't want to talk about.”
 

“
It's possible. He
c
ertainly reacted strongly to seeing his mother and that boyfriend of hers.”
 

“
When he woke from his dream he was shaking and begging to be left alone. He didn't even recognize me at first.
Then, this morning he woke up in a panic because I rolled over on him a little.”
 

“
Why were you
rolling on him?”
 

“
I fell asleep with him under my arm.”
 

“
Don't you think it's a little early in the morning for this conversation?” Mitch asked, addressing his comment to both Antonio and TJ.
 

“
Sorry, Mitch,” TJ answered. “I'm just really worried about Danny."
 

“
Why don't you hold your worries and this discussion for later in the day?”
 

TJ sat up, still distressed by Danny's reaction to him in
bed. He didn't want Mitch to dismiss his concerns so quickly.
 

“
How? It's not that easy."
 

“
Not now, TJ,” Mitch said, a little more firmly.
 

TJ looked pleadingly back towards Antonio for support.

“
Mitch is r
i
ght. Losing sleep over it will not change things. We will all be thinking more clearly after we have a little more sleep.”
 

“
But...”
 

“
That's enough, TJ,” Antonio cautioned. “I promise we will give it our full attention after we have had our morning coffee.” He narrowed his eyes in warning before opening his arms and allowing TJ to nestle back in.
 

TJ exhaled deeply. He knew there was no way he would be able to fall back to sleep now.

“
That had better be the last noise I hear out of you for the next two hours. Unless you want to be spending the remainder of the morning in a corner?” Mitch grumbled irritably.
 

He too had been worrying about Danny. But, his concerns extended to his partners, as well. It had not escaped him that TJ had left their bed during the night. Nor was he shocked to learn that he had been with Danny. Mitch required a solid seven
hours of sleep to be fully functioning, and he could not sleep soundly knowing there was unrest within his home.
 

*****

The discussion later that day did not yield any satisfying results. Danny denied remembering his disturbing dreams despite the fact that they continued for the next three nights. After a week of leaving the master bedroom to join Danny in bed, Mitch and Antonio decided it was time to have another talk with TJ.
 

“
Listen, honey," Antonio began, when the three settled into bed, "it's not that we don't trust you, but Danny is at very impressionable age. If you keep going into his room every night, he is not only going to develop a dependency on you, he may also start to confuse your intentions.”
 

“
But he can't fall asleep after a nightmare unless I'm there.”
 

“
TJ, everybody has bad dreams from time to time. Danny has been on his own for quite a while. I am sure he can manage through the night without you,” Mitch said,
backing up Antonio's words.
 

“
These are different, they aren't normal dreams. He gets really frightened and sometimes he cries. He doesn't think I notice, but I can tell by the way he huddles up and hides his face. I hear him sniffling when he thinks I'm sleeping. He shouldn't be alone when he's that upset.”
 

“
Nobody wants him to be hurting, TJ. However, you can't be spending every night in his bed. You don't have to sleep with him to offer comfort,” Antonio continued to advise.
 

TJ refused to concede his position. “With me he sleeps through the night, and he doesn't have those terrible dreams.”

“
That may be true. Nevertheless, it's not healthy for either one of you to develop a habit of sleeping together.” Although Antonio was sympathetic towards TJ's feelings, he was confident that their concerns held merit.
 

“
But...”
 

“
That's enough, TJ. You heard what we sai
d.
No more arguing,” Mitch warned.
 

“
That's not fair. You said he was my responsibility...”
 

“
TJ, we understand that it is difficult for you to see him so upse
t.
Regardless, if you continue to speak disrespectfully we will end this conversation for another that will begin with you over my knee,” Mitch threatened.
 

“
I'm sorry,” TJ mumbled, “but he needs me.”
 

“
No, what he needs is a safe place where he can learn to take care of himself.”
 

“
No one should have to suffer alone like that.”
 

“
Look, you can offer him a shoulder to cry on, and encourage him to talk about whatever is bothering him. However, if you continue to crawl into bed with him, you are going to have a young man who is not only dependent on you in order to fall asleep, but is liable to develop other feelings for you, as well.
If
you think you have a traumatized boy now, wait until the repercussions that are sure to follow when he realizes his feelings will not be reciprocated.”
 

“
He is way too vulnerable right now,” Antonio sa
i
d,
following up Mitch’s lecture.
 

“
We don't do anything, we just sleep.” TJ wanted to be convincing and regretted sounding so whiny.
 

“
Trust us, TJ, yo
u’
re
heading for trouble.”
 

“
I can handle it, Mitch.”
 

“
That doesn't mean Danny can,” Antonio reasoned.
 

“
It's my job to take care of him,” TJ pushed sullenly.
 

“
Right now it is your job to listen and do what you're told,” Mitch scolded.
 

“
Sweetheart, it’s nice that you care so much about him. We care about him, too. But his issues run deep. Having him here is going to be an adjustment for all of us. As much as we all want to help him, we need to make sure we don't do more harm than good,” Antonio cautioned.
 

“
I brought him here. I have a responsibility to make sure he feels safe.”
 

“
While he is in this house, we’re all responsible for him,” Antonio reminded his young partner.
 

TJ opened his mouth to speak. Mitch cut him off. “Ultimately, you and Danny are our responsibility, and we have final say about what's best for the both of you.”

“
Fine,” TJ uttered with an eye roll, acting very much like the adolescent at the heart of the discussion.
 

Mitch's patience had worn out. He swiftly grabbed TJ, pulled him over his lap, and delivered several sound reprimands to his upturned bottom. “This is your last warning. You will pull your attitude together and watch your tone. Or, do I have to get my belt to remind you just where your responsibilities lie in this house?”
 

“
No, sir. Sorry.”
 

“
Good. So let me make this perfectly clear. You will
not
be going into his bed tonight.”
 

“
What if he has a nightmare?” TJ asked, feeling slightly ridiculous laying over Mitch's lap.
 

“
You may wake him up and offer to talk to him. That's it.”
 

*****

Danny didn’t want to think about how reliant he was becoming on TJ's nightly visits to his room. With TJ at his side, his sleep was calmer, his dreams more peaceful, and he woke better rested. He feared it wouldn't last. When
TJ didn't come into his room that night he wasn't surprised. What he hadn't expected was the way his body physically craved the warmth of his embrace and the soothing caress of his touch. All night long he laid half awake hoping to hear his door crack, and for TJ to crawl into his bed. The next day he was overtired and cranky. After several more nights like that, Danny was miserable.
 

Antonio sent him to bed, concerned that if he continued on his current irritable path, he'd be facing a spanking before the night was over. Danny made a slight fuss about his early bedtime. He dreaded being alone in his room at night. During the day he would keep busy to force haunting memories and bad thoughts to the further recesses of his mind. Being put to bed
caused Danny to feel anxious. It was too much time to think. He couldn't rest knowing the night terrors that tormented his childhood were cycling back.
 

“
It's not even nine o'clock yet,” he complained.
 

“
I'm aware of that, sweetheart, but you've been tired lately. I think its best you make it an early night.”
 

“
I'm fine. I'll go to bed after the movie is over.”
 

“
The movie just started. I'd rather you go to bed now.”
 

“
Why?”
 

“
Please don't argue, Danny. We've talked about the rules of the house. You either do what's asked of you, or suffer the consequences.”
 

Danny detected the threat in Antonio's usually patient demeanor. He wasn't sure if Antonio spanked, too, and decided today was not a good day to find out. He trudged upstairs unhappy about having to face a long night in his room. He tossed in bed for hours. Finally overcome with exhaustion, he fell into a fitful sleep. His nightmares always seemed so real in the mid hours of the night. It was then that Danny had the hardest time distinguishing between what were dreams and bad memories. With vague images quickly receding from his memory, the feeling of foreboding couldn't be shaken. Danny couldn't stay in bed any longer. A tightness in the chest forced him up with plans to distract his mind until morning.
 

Surprised that the door to TJ’s old room was left ajar, Danny wandered closer to take a peek in. He rubbed his eyes to make sure he was seeing correctly. TJ was sleeping in bed by himself. Danny stole a moment to gaze at him. The reading lamp was on over the bedpost, and it casted a soft light on TJ’s fine features. TJ was painfully attractive. Danny’s heart was beating to his throat. He
couldn't resist the compelling urge to crawl into bed with him. The closer he got to TJ, the more nervous he became. He had never initiated contact, and was feeling quite bold as he pulled back the blankets to climb into bed.
 

“
What's the matter, baby? Did you have a bad dream?” Having
heard Danny get up, TJ anticipated him coming into his room.
 

“
No...Yes... I couldn't sleep.”
 

“
Do you want to talk about it?”
 

“
I just want to sleep.”
 

“
You know, it might help to talk. You've had a lot of bad nights lately.”
 

Danny turned red. “There is nothing to talk about. I just have trouble sleeping.”

“
Something is obviously on your mind or you wouldn't be having so much trouble sleeping.”
 

Although Danny didn't want to talk about it, he took solace in hearing TJ's caring voice. It reminded him of the first night they met. With the word
baby
echoing in his head, Danny impulsively leaned over and kissed TJ on the lips.
 

After gaining his senses, TJ pulled away. “What was that for, sweetheart?”

“
I...Why don't you want to kiss me anymore?”
 

“
Danny, you know I'm in a relationship with Mitch and Antonio.”
 

“
But you kissed me before, back at the party.”
 

“
I had a little too much to drink that night. Besides, you looked like you could use one.” Passing his comment off as a joke, TJ offered a sly smile.
 

“
So… what? It was a pity kiss?”
 

“
No. No, that's not what I meant.” TJ tried to retract his insensitive remark. “I wanted to kiss you. You were so damn adorable. I couldn't help myself,” he admitted, this time laughing at himself.
 

It didn't have the effect he was hoping for. Danny couldn't find anything funny about the situation.

“
I shouldn't have given you the wrong impression. I'm sorry."
 

Danny blinked, taking on the appearance of a kicked puppy.
The
look of a hurt, innocent boy struck TJ so profoundly that he instantly understood the gravity of Mitch and Antonio's warning.
 

“
I really am sorry. If I wasn't already in a relationship, and you were a little older...”
 

“
You don't have to say it. I know I'm not your type. Why would you be interested in me?”