Break Me Slowly (15 page)

If this was a game, Adam held the advantage…

~

I held on to my clutch as the limo bumped along the streets of Chicago. Emma and I had exchanged numbers. I liked her so much already. Very blunt, but sweet. She reminded me a lo
t of Megan, only with more edges. Plus, she had to deal with Adam on a regular basis, so it was nice to see a female able to tackle the feat and still have a full head of hair.

I didn
’t even realize we had stopped in front of Adam’s penthouse. He got out and offered me his hand.

“
Aren’t you going to take me home?”

“
No.” He guided me through the doors and into the elevator. “I was hoping you’d stay with me tonight.”

The thought made me happy. That warm and fuzzy happy.
And I needed that. I had held it together through the event, but the truth was, I didn’t know how to handle these feelings. Assurance was something I’d need constantly until I gained enough emotional ground and security for this situation.

I didn
’t know if it was even fair to ask that of Adam. The way he looked at me right then spoke volumes. We had just been surrounded by some of the most beautiful women in the world, yet Adam Kinkade had taken
me
home and wanted
me
in his bed.

H
e leaned in and kissed me. Softly and gently. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered against my lips.

“
How do you do that?”

The elevator opened into Adam
’s foyer and we walked through.

“
Do what?”

“
You seem to…read my mind.”

H
e shook his head. “I read your body. I’ve told you before you’re very expressive. I can tell how you hold yourself, when you tense, how your brow starts to strain.” He touched my forehead and I immediately relaxed my frown. “You give off cues that tell me when you’re troubled, over thinking…” He clutched my hips and pulled my body into his. “And when you’re wanting.”

His hard cock
pressed against my stomach and I arched. I did want him. Wanted that connection and that crazed feeling of obsession. It was never enough. The moment he was inside me was like finding the rest of myself, and when we parted, I thought of him all day, missing him before he’d even gone.

I was falling, and there was
nowhere for me to land. Ever since Adam had come into my world, he’d clipped all the safety nets away.

“
Come with me.” He grabbed my hand and led me to his master bath. It was large and lavish. With the overall modern theme, the fixtures were all black wood and gray steel. The shower took up an entire corner. It wasn’t enclosed, nor did it have a door. Glossy bricks of dark marble spread from the floor and up the wall. A massive waterfall shower head hung from the ceiling. Off to the right was a Jacuzzi tub. The vanity and mirror took up the entire opposite wall.

Adam
started the shower, then his hands were back on me, unfastening my dress.

He kissed me
as the zipper slipped down my back. “I want to shower with you.”

I caught the bodice before it fell from me and took a step back.
“I can’t. You go ahead. I’ll just throw on a T-shirt and wait in the bedroom, if you don’t mind.”

“
You don’t want to shower with me?”

It wasn
’t that I didn’t want to. Last time I was over, I’d passed out with all my makeup on. Sure, I’d probably looked like a train wreck in the morning, but I got to go home first thing and shower there.

I couldn
’t get my face wet in front of Adam.

“
I’ve seen all of you, you know,” he said, pulling and loosening his tie. I started salivating watching him undress. Just his tugging on that thin, black piece of silk was sexy.

“
I know. I just…I just don’t feel like it.”

My heart sank as soon as the words came out
. I wanted to be with him. Skin to skin. Water falling between us. But the remnants that my mother’s talons had left behind were not something I wanted him to see.

H
is tie hung around his neck. He worked open his shirt buttons. Every square inch of skin he uncovered entranced me further. He was strong as stone, masculine and powerful. Once his chest was bare, he reached out and tilted up my chin. My eyes met his.

“
Lover.” He held out his hand, beckoning me give up the death grip I had on my dress. “Please.” His words were fierce, uttered like a command, but he had asked instead.

I was helples
s against it. He’d probably see the scars sooner or later. I had just been hoping for later.

I let my dress fall to the floor
. I felt every caress of his eyes over my skin. Cool air rushed over my nipples and they instantly hardened. Adam’s gaze was slow as he moved those baby blues up and down my body until my sex throbbed and I wanted to squirm. Never taking his stare from me, he undid his pants and finished undressing.

He took my hand. I was trembling
and it had nothing to do with the cold. He stepped under the spray, his eyes still remaining on me. Water fell around him. The man was a god. His eyes burned bright against the soft glow of light. His black hair hung damp around his brow and ears. Tanned skin and rock-hard planes of muscles were sculpted by water drops slipping down his body. His shoulders eased, the tightness of his day was washed away, and I had never seen a more beautiful man.

I w
anted to kneel before him and take all that impressive length into my mouth again. I wanted him to make love to me while water rained down on us...

First I had to get in.

He held his hand out for me to join him. He must have known I was nervous, because he didn’t push me. Didn’t rush. He just stood and waited.

I slid my palm into his and entered. He gently pulled me
against him and the water cascaded down. I hung my head and turned, giving him my back. He let me.

H
eat radiated. It wasn’t just the water, it was him. I could almost hear his brain ticking. He obviously wanted to know what my problem was. But he didn’t speak. Instead, he poured shampoo onto my hair and began lathering. His fingers worked my scalp and massaged me into a lethargic state. The press of his fingertips, followed by the gentle scratch of his nails, sent shivers skating across my skin. He let the water rinse away the suds, then ran conditioner through the strands.

“
You have the most beautiful hair I’ve ever seen.”

When the conditioner
was rinsed away, I ran my fingers under my eyes. My mascara must be running, but that was the least of my worries.

Tears stun
g and I tried to fight them. Tried to shake away the memories. The fear of what Adam would think when he saw me like this. Would he ask me to leave? Would he think I was ugly?

Every day
I looked in the mirror and knew what was there. Though I told myself it was better for him to find out now, I still tensed to run. It was too much to risk. His rejection would devastate me.

“
Katelyn,” he whispered. His hands on my shoulders slowly turned me to face him. Those tears I had been fighting slid down my cheeks.

I looked up at him, face to face, while water
continued to trickle down my brow.

His
jaw tightened and his eyes blazed with fury. My heart struggled to beat. He looked angry and shocked. I knew what he was seeing. I watched his eyes track from the hairline at my temple down my jaw, to my neck. My bottom lip trembled and I thought my knees were going to give out. He took my chin between his first finger and thumb and tilted my head, examining me.

The tears came quicker.
My anxiety should be flaring, but it wasn’t. Adam didn’t make me feel nervous or afraid, he made me feel vulnerable. I was stripped bare—straight to my soul—completely naked.

I squeezed my eyes shut. I knew the image
he was seeing. Pink scars littered my skin, trailing from my temple to my jaw and down my neck like a pathway.

He traced a finger along
the line of scarring and I fused my eyelids together harder. I wanted this to be over. He had seen me now. All of me. Scarred and completely terrified.

“
What is this, Katelyn?” His voice was laced with anger. He must be upset that, like my virginity, I hadn’t told him about this, either.

“
Scars.” I hung my head.

“
I can see that. Scars from what?”

“
F-fingernails.”

I
risked a look at him, expecting to find disgust in his expression. Instead, he looked like he’d just been kicked in the stomach.

“
Someone clawed at your face?” His voice was deadly quiet.

I nodded.

“Who? Because these aren’t scratches. These are deep. Old. Like they were trying to—” He caught himself. His temper was obviously coming out and his tone was growing harsher.

“
Like they were trying to rip my face off,” I finished for him. “Please don’t be mad that I didn’t tell you. I just—”

“
You think I’m mad at you?” He cupped my face in his palms. “I’m ready to kill the bastard who did this. Don’t ever,
ever
think for a moment that this affects my feelings toward you.” He kissed my cheeks, my eyes, my tears. I sobbed and he pulled me into his arms. “Is this why you flinch when people get too close?” He tucked a lock of damp hair behind my ear. “Why you remained a virgin?”

I nodded.
“You’re the only person who’s gotten this close to me without being violent.”

Adam tensed
. His grip on me tightened. I pressed my cheek further into his chest and wrapped my arms around his middle. His lips trailed along the top of my head.

“
I would never put my hands on you with the intention to hurt you.”

“
I know.” Since the day I’d met him, that had never been a doubt in my mind.

“
I’m glad you showed me.”

I looked up at him.
“Do you think I’m weak now?”

He scowled
as though I had slapped him in the face. “I think you’re strong.” He ran his fingertip down my jaw. “You’re kind, vibrant, beautiful. And you survived.” He skimmed my forehead with his lips. “Whatever I have to do to make you realize this, I will.”

Adam
’s endearments sounded like a threat I desperately wanted him to follow through on. He was changing me, flooding me with his will and might.

He stood there and held me,
skin to skin, as the water beat down on us. With one palm on the back of my head and the other tightly around my back, he clung to me and I felt like I could melt right into him. Leave this world and live out my existence as a puddle surrounding Adam Kinkade.

And nothing sounded more peaceful.

“Sure you don’t mind me borrowing your shirt?” I asked, strutting from Adam’s walk-in closet in only a white tee.

He was lying on the bed, long legs stretched out and hands
folded behind his head. He was in a pair of navy blue pajama bottoms and nothing else. Hot damn, the man was mouthwatering.

“
It’s a shame to cover up that body of yours.” He raked his gaze up and down as I came to the edge of the bed. “But seeing you in one of my shirts is fucking sexy as hell.”

It had been weeks since we
’d shared our first shower, and every day seemed better than the last. Adam had tried several times to get me to talk about my past. How I got the scars and more important, who had given them to me. I refused to go into it. Which led to an argument. But the argument led to make-up sex and in the end, the secret was still mine.

I didn
’t want to think about the past or taint Adam with any of the bad memories from it. I was happy to be moving on.

I crawled on my knees atop the bed and
wiggled my eyebrows at him. His arm shot out and wrapped around my waist. In my squeal of delight, he pinned me on the mattress and hovered over me. He tickled my sides and I burst into laughter.

“
I see you have a weak spot.” He smiled.

I begged for mercy and he relented. He eased
himself down on me, his face a few inches from mine, and brushed a lock of hair from my brow.

“
You’re so beautiful.” He trailed his finger along my jaw and the scars that marred it. “All of you.” He kissed my neck. “Especially when you laugh.”

I smiled up at him.
“You realize how unfair this is, right? You’ve found my tickling weakness. I have yet to find a single weakness of yours.”

He
looked at my face as though he was staring at Utopia. “You’re closer to my weakness than you think.”

H
e kissed me and I melted for him. Lifting my shirt up and exposing my bare thighs, he shoved his bottoms down and was inside me instantly. There, surrounded by Adam Kinkade in every possible way, I let myself fall even further into the abyss.