Branded (Strand Brothers Series Book 1) (12 page)

So many questions bubbled through my mind. This was the most I’d ever heard him speak, though I could tell it’d taken its toll on him. The first thing I did was reach over to squeeze his hand. “I’m so sorry.”

When he jerked his hand away, I was shocked and not a little wounded. “Don’t,” he hissed.

What the hell? Why wouldn’t he accept sympathy? As if he read my mind, he clarified, “I do not deserve any of your pity.”

Pity! What was wrong with him? “Nik…” I paused before I continued, “It isn’t pity I feel.”

Odd, he didn’t seem to be feeling grief regarding Rachel. If I had to put a name to his expression, at the moment, it would be dispassionate.
Huh?
Then both of his brows rose, he obviously didn’t believe what I had just conveyed. He hesitated, “What, then?”

Wow, he had really closed himself off from any empathy whatsoever. I wondered why that was. “I know what it’s like to lose someone. That’s all,” I confessed as I wiped away my tears. Every time I thought of my cousin, Cheryl, the grief hit again.

With a flat voice he queried, “Who?”

What a difficult man. I recommenced, “My cousin Cheryl.” When he didn’t say anything, I forged on, “She was as close to me as a sister. So when she took her own life, I thought mine was over, too.” There was no controlling the sob that caught in my throat. He patted my knee for comfort.
See, he’s not without emotion—just damaged.
The act gave me courage to go on, “She tried to tell me. But I was sixteen, and none of us knew what signs to look out for.” I swallowed the large lump caught in my throat, not wanting to rehash this. Then I realized he felt the same way. At that moment, I clearly heard the lyrics to the song still playing in the background: the question of breaking free from chains hanging in the air between us
.
Wish I had the answer to that.

I took his hand in mine, needing contact—some form of connection. When he gazed into my eyes, something shifted. He leaned in, but instead of placing his lips on mine, he kissed me right below my ear. To give him full access to my throat, I tilted my head to the side. The invitation was accepted. Ah, his mouth was hot and wet. Once he began to lick up and down the tendons of my neck, I was lost and wanted
more
. So much more. I tried to reciprocate, but he wouldn’t allow me to. Already panting with need, I noticed his breathing was heavier as well. At least I knew he felt it, too.

He nuzzled my nose with his and breathed, “Marry me, Aimee.”

I was instantly pulled from my sensual haze.
WTF?!
“Excuse me?”

“Do I really need to repeat myself?” he asked rhetorically. “It’s the only way to insure your safety,” he explained. “I know you recognize that.”

“This is insanity,” I blurted out. To reiterate that fact, the lyrics once more played loud and clear about how it was
all around us. Ha! How was that for rhetoric?

“Maybe.” He countered, “Doesn’t change anything.” No, the irony wasn’t lost on him either.

I stood and walked away, needing space and time to think by myself. As I paced down the hallway, over my shoulder I called, “Give me a few minutes, will you?”

He nodded in agreement, which ended our conversation—
for a while at least
.

I opened the door to the guestroom I was staying in. That was the last thing I ever expected from Nik Strand. Sure, he had proposed before, but I knew he didn’t want to follow through with it. But
this
time something was different, as if he had decided there was no other way. So how could I say yes? My subconscious pointed out,
how can you not? You want him.
And there lay the crux of my answer.

Chapter Thirteen

Nik

Holy shit! Did I actually just propose? Yes, that had been my plan. But it wasn’t supposed to be so easy to do. No, it should’ve been the hardest thing to ask. Instead, reality kicked me in the teeth. Bottom line, I wanted her to be
mine
. Fuck. That wasn’t right. Those feelings should not exist. “I’m not supposed to care,” I mumbled under my breath. With my head in my hands, I sunk down onto the couch and fought like hell to keep the tears at bay. Over and over in my head I told Rachel,
I’m so sorry, baby. I’m sorry.
My heart ached and guilt overwhelmed me. How could I betray Rachel this way?

I didn’t know if I sat like that for a few minutes or a few hours, so when Aimee approached and greeted, “Hey,” I startled.

I ran my hand over my face and hoped there was no trace of moisture there. I responded, “Hi,” and patted the cushion beside me. She took the hint and sat down. Shock instantly shot through me when she clutched my hand in hers.

She confided, “I’ve been thinking.”

Ah, hell. She was going to fight me on this. As much as I wanted her to say yes, I also wanted her to say no.
How messed up is that?
“Come to any conclusions?”

“Yeah, I did.”

Damn. Here goes.
“What are they?”

She took a fortifying breath and acknowledged, “You’re right. It is the best answer to the problem.”

I sort of chuckled. “Is that a yes, Aimee?”

She bit her bottom lip. Heaven help me, but that was hot. At the moment, I wanted to run my tongue over her mouth before I delved deep inside to explore.
Where do these thoughts keep coming from?
Again, I was struck by familiarity. As if I already knew how she tasted. Impossible. She glanced up at me and answered, “Yes.”

The desire to sweep her onto my lap and kiss her senseless was almost my undoing. Somehow, I mustered every ounce of self-control and stood, then strode over to the bar and called, “Would you like a drink?”

In disbelief she shook her head and observed, “I just agreed to be your wife. And you’re asking if I want a drink? What the hell, Nik?”

Ah, should’ve known that temper of hers wasn’t far off. I fought the smile that threatened. Her feistiness was a huge turn on. I adjusted myself, as discreetly as possible, before I walked over with a bottle of champagne and offered her a glass. Next I held mine to hers and expounded, “Yes, to celebrate.”

As our flutes
clinked
in a toast
,
she regarded me sheepishly. “Sorry ‘bout my outburst.”

“’S all good.” I took another drink before I proceeded, “Listen. I’m not expecting you to be my wife in the biblical sense. Only on paper.”

She actually looked affronted. “What the…?!” She stood and began to pace the room. “Expound, please?”

“I meant what I said,” I reiterated, “We’ll be married on paper only.”

She spun around and marched right up to me. While she pointed her slender finger at my face, she growled, “Seriously? You expect us to be married for what”—throwing her hands up in exasperation—“months, years perhaps? And we won’t share a bed. Is that what you’re saying?”

Well, yeah. I thought that’d make her happy. Obviously, I was mistaken. “We don’t love each other.”
At least, you don’t love me.
I wasn’t so sure about me loving her. Which was just beyond fucked up, I
couldn’t
love her. Or could I? Dammit. It was never going to work if I didn’t get my head on straight.

She blinked her eyes furiously. Was she crying?
Way to go, Nik.
“Maybe not yet. But later…Well, we could eventually, right?”

I could hear the hope in that question. Time to quash it, so I lied, “No.”

She gasped, “You won’t even give us a chance?”

I can’t, Aimee. Don’t you see that?
If I allow myself to love you, or worse, you love me, something bad will happen. It always does.
“Many marriages don’t have love involved. It’s nothing new,” I pointed out.

“Omigod! Do you really expect me to be caught in a loveless marriage for the rest of my life?” She was appalled, and honestly, so was I. What the hell was I thinking? She hissed, “So no sex? Am I supposed to live without it forever? Or find it elsewhere?”

Now that pissed me off. No way would I let her give that sumptuous body to another man. “Sex and love are not mutually exclusive.
You
of all people should know that.”

She stamped her foot. “Did you just call me a whore?” she screamed.

What a frustrating woman! I had not called her that. How could she think such a thing? I snarled, “I would never call you something so vile. How dare you accuse me of such?”

“How dare I? Oh, Nik, you are beyond exasperating!”

“Me? Woman, you aggravate the hell out of me.” With that, I turned and left the room. But I heard the glass shatter, along with her sobs. I knew I should turn around. Comfort her. At the very least, talk to her and share my thoughts. Not. Going. To. Happen.
I really am a bastard.

*****

I needed to calm down, so I took a shower. Every cell in my body cried out for Aimee’s. There was nothing I wanted more than to shove her against the wall and take her. No other woman had ever stirred my emotions like she did. Well, the exception was the beauty from that masquerade. Something about the masked goddess had called to me on an elemental level. I had to have
her.
Kind of like now. Who was I kidding? I was fighting a losing battle. If it were simply lust, I would act on it. Yet even in this agitated state, I knew it was more. Knew, I couldn’t live with just one time. No, if I had sex with Aimee, I’d only want more. So, the solution was not to do anything stupid.
Yeah, right. Stupidity has never stopped you before.
As the visions of the masquerade played through my head, I stroked my enormous erection. Hell, I didn’t know I could swell to this size. What was the connection between that one night from my past and Aimee? How could two different women cause the same reaction? Why had my wife not had such an effect on me?

This was exactly what I needed—release. I poured more body wash into my hands and allowed myself the escape. As I pumped myself harder and faster from base to tip, I thought I heard a sigh. My eyes popped open as I tried to see through the steam on the shower door. Then I froze, literally, with my dick in my hands, as I recognized the figure watching me.
Aimee.
I held her gaze and began to stroke again. Without breaking eye contact, I grunted as I came harder than I ever had in my life. The orgasm wouldn’t stop as I continued spurting the shower door and walls over and over again.
Holy shit. At this rate I won’t have any left.
She stood there blatantly aroused, watching. The lust dancing in her eyes made her appear to be a goddess standing there before me. One pleased with the effect she had.
Minx.
Fine, I could play.

Once I cleaned myself up, I shut off the water, grabbed my towel, stepped out of the shower, and, without pause, stalked towards her. After I dried off, I clasped her waist and lifted her onto the vanity. I ran my hands through her hair and fisted it. Then I pulled her head back and ravaged her throat with my lips, tongue, and teeth. I continued to taste her until she was breathing rapidly. In response, she rubbed her body against mine like a cat in heat.
Fuck. Yeah.
When she arched her back, I could feel her nipples harden through her blouse and bra. Unable to resist such an invitation, I took one of them into my mouth. All the while she begged for more. Against her breast I whispered, “Take it off. All of it.”

There was no hesitation as she bared herself to me. And I could do nothing else but step back and admire the beauty before me. “Lovely,” I purred, “So damn perfect.” Once more, I zeroed in on her voluptuous tits. They were enough to make a man weep with joy. There was no other choice, homage must be paid. Under my assault, her head thrashed back and forth. She was close, so close, but I didn’t want to bring her this way. My fingers traveled down to the dripping crevice between her thighs. As I stroked her clit, she moaned deeply. “That’s right, Aimee. Come for me.” I circled the bundle of nerves again with my thumb and entered her hot core with two fingers. While my hand was busy between her legs, I once again laved, first one, and then the other nipple. I used my other hand to hold her in place by the waist and gave her no choice but to accept all I had to give. After a few moments, she broke apart. Damn, her detonation was spectacular. A smug,
yeah, I did that
echoed through my mind. And I had every intention of doing it again when we both heard:

“Oh, sorry.”

Shit. Why was my brother here? Without taking my eyes off Aimee’s I said, “Give me a minute, Alex.”

He stammered, “Yeah…okay…I’ll wait for you in the study.”

Once he left, I asked, “Are you all right?”

Aimee’s face was flushed a beautiful shade of pink. Unsure if it was from embarrassment or pleasure, I wrapped a robe around her. She finally answered, “I’m fine.”

I walked into my bedroom and grabbed some sweats and a t-shirt from my dresser drawer. She stood in the doorway. As I passed her, I stroked her cheek. “We’ll talk later, okay?”

“Alright.” She turned and padded away.

I couldn’t help but wonder what in the world I was going to do now. Like I had predicted, once I had a taste of her, I wouldn’t want to stop. Damn it all to hell.

*****

Alex sat pensively on the chair in front of my desk with a scotch in his hands. Hell, this did not look good. After I filled my own glass, I took the chair next to him. “Lay it on me.”

He shook his head. “I didn’t realize the two of you had gotten so close.”

I shrugged. “Neither here nor there. Talk to me.”

He was affronted. “Don’t give me your I-don’t-give-a-crap attitude, Nik.”

“You really wanna go there?” I snarled while giving him a baleful look.

He squirmed under my heated gaze and put his hands up in a surrendering fashion. “All I’m sayin’ is you care.” As I leaned forward, he wisely pushed back as far as possible in his seat. “You don’t want to, but you do,” he bravely stated.

Damn. I wasn’t ready to own up to anything. My head, my heart, and my body were in knots over Aimee. I couldn’t. No, wouldn’t voice a thing. Not until I had some ounce of control back. Funny, self-control had never been an issue for me. Probably the reason why I was so good at business. Knee-jerk reactions weren’t in my repertoire.
Until Aimee. You have no control around her. Oh, shut the fuck up,
I told myself. I stood and then strode across the room. After a beat, I finally proclaimed, “You’re not here to discuss my love life.”